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Chasing the Dragon..?

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff

I’d be interested to know if anyone on FAB feels like they’ve peaked on here having already had their perfect meet/FWB; but then couldn’t see them again for whatever reason?

It would also be good to understand their mindset afterwards. Did they consider quitting FAB, become unrealistically picky, unfairly treat future playmates by comparing them to the one that got away, keep meeting but have never since been truly satisfied by anyone else, landed up settling for an inferior model living happily/sadly ever after or anything else really?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Not me. This is a no strings attached style relationship site predominantly focussed around swinging, whatever preconceptions and needs that we bring here. Expectations are all.

In life, we will find different opportunities available to us throughout it and these will vary, depending on our abilities as well as how we may match with others.

Perhaps the swinging lifestyle won't be far all of us, for all of our lives. For fab, it can often be better for us to take a break from time to time. Our needs will typically not remain static throughout the many years that we have left on this planet and that can be part of the beauty of life, meeting new challenges and satisfying interests.

It's certainly worth taking stock of where we're at and what we want, so that we can ensure we're living appropriately for us. A lot still comes down to our expectations from swinging and the site though. I'd not expect that 1 site will give me everything that I need, for all of needs, for all of my life.

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Very interesting perspective above.

I met some one here 3 years ago and then covid hit .she has the potential to be everything I want in play partner and would be happy for that to continue for years .and so it has but with infrequent meeting .

Then each time since up to today's

Meet gets cancelled because of family responciblities beyond our control .if this carries on for another 3 years I think I'll have lost the desire to bother. Hence here for forums .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/03/22 03:32:21]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yep fab is a very tiny part of my real time on a scale of importance i live in the shadow of my old life unable and unwilling to step back into the light my abilities are the same but iv become no more than a world class vibrator who now does things to distract myself and prove im still worthy focusing on other parts of my life seeking out fleeting joy trying to repair my mind and my body still able to seduce but not able to connect like i used to simply filling my time in the hope that one day my true light shines on me again until then il keep fighting my fight rewarding those lucky few who i fit in my calender even 50% me is still potent and addictive as sugar

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By *atricia ParnelWoman
over a year ago

In a town full of colours

Luckily no but then I am always open to the next connection. People stay in your life for as long as they are meant to. It's all fluid and ever changing as life is. I'm not going to stop looking for those connections as they are far and few between and I wouldn't do any of my friends the injustice of comparison to others

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Not me. This is a no strings attached style relationship site predominantly focussed around swinging, whatever preconceptions and needs that we bring here. Expectations are all.

In life, we will find different opportunities available to us throughout it and these will vary, depending on our abilities as well as how we may match with others.

Perhaps the swinging lifestyle won't be far all of us, for all of our lives. For fab, it can often be better for us to take a break from time to time. Our needs will typically not remain static throughout the many years that we have left on this planet and that can be part of the beauty of life, meeting new challenges and satisfying interests.

It's certainly worth taking stock of where we're at and what we want, so that we can ensure we're living appropriately for us. A lot still comes down to our expectations from swinging and the site though. I'd not expect that 1 site will give me everything that I need, for all of needs, for all of my life. "

I totally agree with your description of what the site and lifestyle is supposed to be. I’d like to think everyone who signs up also understands that and there aren’t many naive enough to join FAB to find love... but that said it’s a little cold to suggest you can’t stumble upon your life partner on here as I’ve met so many FAB (or similar) couples that have met in scene and have been together for decades. I think it’s also easy to overlook that there’s so many people that join here having come out of, or even sometimes still in, long term sexually incompatible relationships that fall for another FAB member because of a shared kink appetite they once thought was out of reach. I’d like to think the FAB community better than most can recognise the importance of sex in a healthy relationship

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Luckily no but then I am always open to the next connection. People stay in your life for as long as they are meant to. It's all fluid and ever changing as life is. I'm not going to stop looking for those connections as they are far and few between and I wouldn't do any of my friends the injustice of comparison to others "

You’re right and that’s a healthy way to think about it, “what’s meant to, just happens”.

As someone who also values connection over the meat market, I do believe that runs the risk that one day you could get accidentally lost in that connection

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By *ecky and justCouple
over a year ago

Godalming

No, we’ve not peaked.

Yes, we found love on Fab.

No, we’ll never be complacent and we’ll chase each new high together..

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff


"yep fab is a very tiny part of my real time on a scale of importance i live in the shadow of my old life unable and unwilling to step back into the light my abilities are the same but iv become no more than a world class vibrator who now does things to distract myself and prove im still worthy focusing on other parts of my life seeking out fleeting joy trying to repair my mind and my body still able to seduce but not able to connect like i used to simply filling my time in the hope that one day my true light shines on me again until then il keep fighting my fight rewarding those lucky few who i fit in my calender even 50% me is still potent and addictive as sugar "

That’s worryingly poignant but still a horrible way to think about yourself my friend. In text, I can’t tell if you’re reaching out for support or you’re very accepting of it. Either way, that mindset is surely not sustainable long term and you need to revaluate what you’re getting out of this, and more so reconsider and recognise your genuine self worth.

I’m sure/think there’s an element of sarcasm in there but it is a mindset some guys may believe that’s for sure. I’ve always said FAB is healthily very empowering for the ladies, but if the result is a growing number of men thinking like that, I may need to revaluate my thoughts around the social power switch these sites inadvertently create

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Very interesting perspective above.

I met some one here 3 years ago and then covid hit .she has the potential to be everything I want in play partner and would be happy for that to continue for years .and so it has but with infrequent meeting .

Then each time since up to today's

Meet gets cancelled because of family responciblities beyond our control .if this carries on for another 3 years I think I'll have lost the desire to bother. Hence here for forums ."

Interesting, but, and I genuinely have no idea on this having never experienced it; isn’t the concept of finding the one all about be willing to wait for them, walk on nails for them etc. Perhaps then she was never your dragon

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff


"No, we’ve not peaked.

Yes, we found love on Fab.

No, we’ll never be complacent and we’ll chase each new high together..

"

That’s a healthy and positive outlook on this whole conversation and one everyone should strive to get to. Unfortunately I don’t think most will, with their inner pessimist playing havoc with their mental health.

... but genuinely “EVERYONE READING THIS THREAD, TRY TO AIM FOR THIS MINDSET OR AS CLOSE AS POSSIBLE”

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South

I’ve definitely peaked on here! Though not from having a meet that couldn’t be matched, but more from being on here during Covid and seeing the selfishness on my local updates. Prioritising their need for casual sex over health. Moans and whiny updates about needing fucked when the virus was still new and very worrying to most. I decided there and then I was done meeting. I no longer have any interest in meeting anyone from here, for anything. My wanting to meet for casual sex withered up and died overnight. I realised there was more important things in life. I’ve been there, done what I wanted and I know I’m not missing out on anything.

That probably sounds very trite, but meh. I don’t care.

I’m here for the forums. The forums only. They were my place for social comfort when we couldn’t get out.

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff


"I’ve definitely peaked on here! Though not from having a meet that couldn’t be matched, but more from being on here during Covid and seeing the selfishness on my local updates. Prioritising their need for casual sex over health. Moans and whiny updates about needing fucked when the virus was still new and very worrying to most. I decided there and then I was done meeting. I no longer have any interest in meeting anyone from here, for anything. My wanting to meet for casual sex withered up and died overnight. I realised there was more important things in life. I’ve been there, done what I wanted and I know I’m not missing out on anything.

That probably sounds very trite, but meh. I don’t care.

I’m here for the forums. The forums only. They were my place for social comfort when we couldn’t get out. "

You shouldn’t care either. It’s a public forum and everyone is allowed to say their bit and have an opinion. Nobody can ever tell you you’re wrong on what you’ve said as it’s not a tangible subject.

I will also add that I certainly recognise and empathise with everything you’ve said; I was someone cleaning and placing flowers on a grave just this Sunday gone to commemorate the first year anniversary of a fantastic Gentleman who died of COVID-19

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 23/03/22 07:56:14]

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

[Removed by poster at 23/03/22 08:11:41]

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire


"I think I might fall into the naive category.

I realise it’s a sex site but I like getting to know new people, making friends through going to clubs. To find a friend on the same wavelength would be great but to find a life partner? Not so sure.

I haven’t either peaked or unpeaked (If that’s the right word) Just here to open up my mind"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Peaked?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"yep fab is a very tiny part of my real time on a scale of importance i live in the shadow of my old life unable and unwilling to step back into the light my abilities are the same but iv become no more than a world class vibrator who now does things to distract myself and prove im still worthy focusing on other parts of my life seeking out fleeting joy trying to repair my mind and my body still able to seduce but not able to connect like i used to simply filling my time in the hope that one day my true light shines on me again until then il keep fighting my fight rewarding those lucky few who i fit in my calender even 50% me is still potent and addictive as sugar

That’s worryingly poignant but still a horrible way to think about yourself my friend. In text, I can’t tell if you’re reaching out for support or you’re very accepting of it. Either way, that mindset is surely not sustainable long term and you need to revaluate what you’re getting out of this, and more so reconsider and recognise your genuine self worth.

I’m sure/think there’s an element of sarcasm in there but it is a mindset some guys may believe that’s for sure. I’ve always said FAB is healthily very empowering for the ladies, but if the result is a growing number of men thinking like that, I may need to revaluate my thoughts around the social power switch these sites inadvertently create"
no no im not moaning or reaching out for help just answering a question im good i feel strong i stay super busy and use my frustrations as fuel to make me fitter and stronger i have a focus to simply be there and im good with that fab and shagging around doesnt define my worth my honour and loyalty to those i care about and sacrifice for does

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. I prefer to keep an open mind.

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff


"yep fab is a very tiny part of my real time on a scale of importance i live in the shadow of my old life unable and unwilling to step back into the light my abilities are the same but iv become no more than a world class vibrator who now does things to distract myself and prove im still worthy focusing on other parts of my life seeking out fleeting joy trying to repair my mind and my body still able to seduce but not able to connect like i used to simply filling my time in the hope that one day my true light shines on me again until then il keep fighting my fight rewarding those lucky few who i fit in my calender even 50% me is still potent and addictive as sugar

That’s worryingly poignant but still a horrible way to think about yourself my friend. In text, I can’t tell if you’re reaching out for support or you’re very accepting of it. Either way, that mindset is surely not sustainable long term and you need to revaluate what you’re getting out of this, and more so reconsider and recognise your genuine self worth.

I’m sure/think there’s an element of sarcasm in there but it is a mindset some guys may believe that’s for sure. I’ve always said FAB is healthily very empowering for the ladies, but if the result is a growing number of men thinking like that, I may need to revaluate my thoughts around the social power switch these sites inadvertently createno no im not moaning or reaching out for help just answering a question im good i feel strong i stay super busy and use my frustrations as fuel to make me fitter and stronger i have a focus to simply be there and im good with that fab and shagging around doesnt define my worth my honour and loyalty to those i care about and sacrifice for does "

Top man, glad to hear it brother!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I’ve definitely peaked on here! Though not from having a meet that couldn’t be matched, but more from being on here during Covid and seeing the selfishness on my local updates. Prioritising their need for casual sex over health. Moans and whiny updates about needing fucked when the virus was still new and very worrying to most. I decided there and then I was done meeting. I no longer have any interest in meeting anyone from here, for anything. My wanting to meet for casual sex withered up and died overnight. I realised there was more important things in life. I’ve been there, done what I wanted and I know I’m not missing out on anything.

That probably sounds very trite, but meh. I don’t care.

I’m here for the forums. The forums only. They were my place for social comfort when we couldn’t get out. "

I'm in a similar head space, although I'm hoping it isn't permanent. I've seen a very dark, ugly side of humanity and I want nothing to do with it.

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By *cidcassual88Man
over a year ago

Glasshoughton

Chasing the dragon means something totally different in some parts of the country do you know !

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By *arkcrystalMan
over a year ago

Bristol

Do you mean the how to train your dragons films?

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.


"Chasing the dragon means something totally different in some parts of the country do you know ! "

Errmmm exactly what I thought.

I'm very confused chasing the dragon means something very different to pretty much everyone else on the planet.

OP I think you should Google it's meaning.

Unless that's what you mean or today's lingo has changed it's meaning??

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire


"I’d be interested to know if anyone on FAB feels like they’ve peaked on here having already had their perfect meet/FWB; but then couldn’t see them again for whatever reason?

It would also be good to understand their mindset afterwards. Did they consider quitting FAB, become unrealistically picky, unfairly treat future playmates by comparing them to the one that got away, keep meeting but have never since been truly satisfied by anyone else, landed up settling for an inferior model living happily/sadly ever after or anything else really? "

We met on here and I’m sure before we got together we had some good meets but it’s fair to say that we both rocked each other’s worlds enough for us to get together as a couple.

We wanted to carry on in this lifestyle but I guess our mindset is different now as we only look for connections which are going to provide us with top shelf memories or something’s that’s going to blow our minds. We get great sex from each other so we look for good connections and people who are going to enhance our play.

Luckily the people we’ve met have all been fantastic.

K

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By *cidcassual88Man
over a year ago

Glasshoughton

I know what it means dont need google lol

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I'm v lucky that I found my partner here over 6 years ago.

I'm still open to new experiences etc,but Its v rare now that I find anyone I'd want to meet on this profile.

On our couple profile we are both open to enjoying more experiences together .

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central


"Not me. This is a no strings attached style relationship site predominantly focussed around swinging, whatever preconceptions and needs that we bring here. Expectations are all.

In life, we will find different opportunities available to us throughout it and these will vary, depending on our abilities as well as how we may match with others.

Perhaps the swinging lifestyle won't be far all of us, for all of our lives. For fab, it can often be better for us to take a break from time to time. Our needs will typically not remain static throughout the many years that we have left on this planet and that can be part of the beauty of life, meeting new challenges and satisfying interests.

It's certainly worth taking stock of where we're at and what we want, so that we can ensure we're living appropriately for us. A lot still comes down to our expectations from swinging and the site though. I'd not expect that 1 site will give me everything that I need, for all of needs, for all of my life.

I totally agree with your description of what the site and lifestyle is supposed to be. I’d like to think everyone who signs up also understands that and there aren’t many naive enough to join FAB to find love... but that said it’s a little cold to suggest you can’t stumble upon your life partner on here as I’ve met so many FAB (or similar) couples that have met in scene and have been together for decades. I think it’s also easy to overlook that there’s so many people that join here having come out of, or even sometimes still in, long term sexually incompatible relationships that fall for another FAB member because of a shared kink appetite they once thought was out of reach. I’d like to think the FAB community better than most can recognise the importance of sex in a healthy relationship "

I wasn't suggesting that we can't meet our ideal partner here - that does and has happened, as the many marriages and enduring relationships support. These could occur elsewhere too, though getting together via here or the swinging scene introduce us to others who may share some essential values that we want in a partner.

Overall, I take each day as it comes, the best for me may lie ahead, even though I may already have had it.

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff

[Removed by poster at 24/03/22 04:55:20]

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By *ove to explore OP   Man
over a year ago

Cardiff

Please kindly ignore the obvious grammatical and spelling mistakes as auto correct hates me and I’m only now getting into bed after a very long 26 hour day

Good night for now fab family!

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