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"Jack Daniel and cola please barmaid and emmm what ever your haveing on me " Coming right up  . I’ll have a jäger | |||
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"Me so thirsty today cant shift it think its cos i was glued to the bog having a dumb and dumber moment dehydrated me "Gallon of water coming right up | |||
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"Lager top ..please hun xx "Hello stranger . What would you like on top of it  | |||
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"Jack Daniel and cola please barmaid and emmm what ever your haveing on me Coming right up . I’ll have a jäger "Thank you and ok then perfect | |||
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"I’ve got one thanks "Evening Stumpy. Please yourself then, I’ll drink yours | |||
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"I’ve got one thanks
Evening Stumpy. Please yourself then, I’ll drink yours "Well you know you’d be welcome to join me  | |||
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"As the OP from another thread wasn’t sharing, can I have a bottle of whiskey please? The cheap stuff from Aldi will do "How do you know I shop at Aldi? | |||
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"Do you serve coffees at this time?" This isn’t a cafe . Of course, what would you like | |||
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"Do you serve coffees at this time? This isn’t a cafe . Of course, what would you like "Single shot latte please | |||
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"Do you serve coffees at this time? This isn’t a cafe . Of course, what would you like "Espresso for me, please. | |||
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"As the OP from another thread wasn’t sharing, can I have a bottle of whiskey please? The cheap stuff from Aldi will do "A whole bottle . Would you like a mixer for it | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 19/03/22 20:02:19]" Can of please if you insist on a mixer  | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 19/03/22 20:02:19]" Ben Romach, the 15 year old. . . .don't you dare come near with any mixer except that wee drop of water | |||
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"Do you serve coffees at this time? This isn’t a cafe . Of course, what would you like
Espresso for me, please. "Shot of brandy in it | |||
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"Think I need a double! In fact give me two amaretto sours please "I have dissorono. Any good? X | |||
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"Can I have 2 pints of San Miguel and 2 Pernod lemonade's please. "Coming right up | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up "You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this?? | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up "Swear I typed in the first and second posts. Only asking for it as a mixer so not that important | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
Swear I typed in the first and second posts. Only asking for it as a mixer so not that important "C*** sometimes get autoblocked fir dr**s reference | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this?? "No I’ve definitely not got the patience | |||
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"Think I need a double! In fact give me two amaretto sours please
I have dissorono. Any good? X"I'm in a pub mate they have loads of it. Get your erse down here. | |||
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"Think I need a double! In fact give me two amaretto sours please
I have dissorono. Any good? X
I'm in a pub mate they have loads of it. Get your erse down here. "I would. Small problem. 13 year old son with me | |||
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"Grrr it removes c0ke from my messages. Fuck it I’ll just have the whiskey " Ok Sprout calm the feck down…deep breaths and here’s a bottle | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience "Add honesty to your list of pros | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros "You could help behind the bar x | |||
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"Think I need a double! In fact give me two amaretto sours please
I have dissorono. Any good? X
I'm in a pub mate they have loads of it. Get your erse down here.
I would. Small problem. 13 year old son with me "Bring him! We’ll all have a wee sing-along in a minute. He’ll have a ball! | |||
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"Think I need a double! In fact give me two amaretto sours please
I have dissorono. Any good? X
I'm in a pub mate they have loads of it. Get your erse down here.
I would. Small problem. 13 year old son with me
Bring him! We’ll all have a wee sing-along in a minute. He’ll have a ball! "En route x | |||
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"Grrr it removes c0ke from my messages. Fuck it I’ll just have the whiskey Ok Sprout calm the feck down…deep breaths and here’s a bottle "Thank you. I’ll be in my happy place in 30 minutes | |||
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"Dear Chëëky6? - please may I have a large highball filled Martin Miller's Gin and tonic, served with ice and a wedge of lime? "You’re Ram-bling now Nero, I think you’ve had enough | |||
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"Grrr it removes c0ke from my messages. Fuck it I’ll just have the whiskey Ok Sprout calm the feck down…deep breaths and here’s a bottle
Thank you. I’ll be in my happy place in 30 minutes "30? Amateur | |||
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"Think I need a double! In fact give me two amaretto sours please
I have dissorono. Any good? X
I'm in a pub mate they have loads of it. Get your erse down here.
I would. Small problem. 13 year old son with me
Bring him! We’ll all have a wee sing-along in a minute. He’ll have a ball! "That sounds like the start of a social. | |||
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"Think I need a double! In fact give me two amaretto sours please
I have dissorono. Any good? X
I'm in a pub mate they have loads of it. Get your erse down here.
I would. Small problem. 13 year old son with me
Bring him! We’ll all have a wee sing-along in a minute. He’ll have a ball!
That sounds like the start of a social. "This needs to occur | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros "Like poster below said..you can come and help..pleeeeeeease | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros
You could help behind the bar x"I’d be a disaster, but I can smile, chat and put out bowls of snacks. | |||
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"Grrr it removes c0ke from my messages. Fuck it I’ll just have the whiskey Ok Sprout calm the feck down…deep breaths and here’s a bottle
Thank you. I’ll be in my happy place in 30 minutes "Where’s that then | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros
You could help behind the bar x
I’d be a disaster, but I can smile, chat and put out bowls of snacks."Yes and drinks are free | |||
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"Grrr it removes c0ke from my messages. Fuck it I’ll just have the whiskey " Try the Pepsi  | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros
You could help behind the bar x
I’d be a disaster, but I can smile, chat and put out bowls of snacks."Reach for the high stuff.....no, scrap that x | |||
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"Sparkling water please. And something for yourself.  "Only serve tap water here but I can blow into for a few minutes to create some | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros
You could help behind the bar x
I’d be a disaster, but I can smile, chat and put out bowls of snacks.
Reach for the high stuff.....no, scrap that x"Whit nae Bombay Mix! | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros
You could help behind the bar x
I’d be a disaster, but I can smile, chat and put out bowls of snacks.
Yes and drinks are free "Free drinks?! *whips off top* Let’s partaaaaay! | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros
You could help behind the bar x
I’d be a disaster, but I can smile, chat and put out bowls of snacks.
Reach for the high stuff.....no, scrap that x
Whit nae Bombay Mix!"Brannigans.....oh shit, they're not available | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros
You could help behind the bar x
I’d be a disaster, but I can smile, chat and put out bowls of snacks.
Yes and drinks are free
Free drinks?!
*whips off top*
Let’s partaaaaay!"( . Y . ) Like your bartending skills, Dieu. . . | |||
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"Coke Can’t you make your mind up
You’re lovely, gorgeous and clearly very efficient … but you sure you got the people skills for this??
No I’ve definitely not got the patience
Add honesty to your list of pros
You could help behind the bar x
I’d be a disaster, but I can smile, chat and put out bowls of snacks.
Yes and drinks are free
Free drinks?!
*whips off top*
Let’s partaaaaay!"Ok, bit early, but why not x | |||
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" x"Never too early for taps aff. . . | |||
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"Sparkling water please. And something for yourself.
Only serve tap water here but I can blow into for a few minutes to create some "I love the thought of your warm breath in my drink. | |||
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"Sparkling water please. And something for yourself.
Only serve tap water here but I can blow into for a few minutes to create some
I love the thought of your warm breath in my drink. "No she was farting in it | |||
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"Jaegerbomb Jaegerbomb JAEGERBOMB who's with me?? "Again, bit early, but let's go! | |||
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"Sparkling water please. And something for yourself.
Only serve tap water here but I can blow into for a few minutes to create some
I love the thought of your warm breath in my drink.
No she was farting in it "Mmmmmmm. Even nicer. | |||
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"Sparkling water please. And something for yourself.
Only serve tap water here but I can blow into for a few minutes to create some
I love the thought of your warm breath in my drink.
No she was farting in it
Mmmmmmm. Even nicer. " you've had enough fella. Get the bouncers! | |||
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"Dear Chëëky6? - please may I have a large highball filled Martin Miller's Gin and tonic, served with ice and a wedge of lime?
You’re Ram-bling now Nero, I think you’ve had enough "° I'm totally bereft from being denied your libation. | |||
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"Tit juice please "You want ice in that? | |||
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"Sparkling water please. And something for yourself.
Only serve tap water here but I can blow into for a few minutes to create some
I love the thought of your warm breath in my drink.
No she was farting in it
Mmmmmmm. Even nicer.
you've had enough fella. Get the bouncers!"Bad news: you ARE the bouncer!   x | |||
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"Tit juice please
You want ice in that?"Nope, spoils the flavour | |||
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"Sparkling water please. And something for yourself.
Only serve tap water here but I can blow into for a few minutes to create some
I love the thought of your warm breath in my drink.
No she was farting in it
Mmmmmmm. Even nicer.
you've had enough fella. Get the bouncers!
Bad news: you ARE the bouncer! x"Righto. Grab your coat son, you're barred! x | |||
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"......the DJ has arrived. Black Lace first up......we're having a gangbang, we're having a ball...." Can I request Agadooo? | |||
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"......the DJ has arrived. Black Lace first up......we're having a gangbang, we're having a ball...." | |||
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"......the DJ has arrived. Black Lace first up......we're having a gangbang, we're having a ball.... Can I request Agadooo?" Steady son, he's got pat and Mick lined up next with ' I haven't stopped dancing yet' | |||
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"......the DJ has arrived. Black Lace first up......we're having a gangbang, we're having a ball.... Can I request Agadooo? Steady son, he's got pat and Mick lined up next with ' I haven't stopped dancing yet' "Okay, okay I will wait 29 minutes. But can we have the Conga afterwards? | |||
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"......the DJ has arrived. Black Lace first up......we're having a gangbang, we're having a ball.... Can I request Agadooo? Steady son, he's got pat and Mick lined up next with ' I haven't stopped dancing yet'
Okay, okay I will wait 29 minutes. But can we have the Conga afterwards? "Yep, but it's naked! | |||
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"......the DJ has arrived. Black Lace first up......we're having a gangbang, we're having a ball.... Can I request Agadooo? Steady son, he's got pat and Mick lined up next with ' I haven't stopped dancing yet'
Okay, okay I will wait 29 minutes. But can we have the Conga afterwards? "Absolutely Davie. There’s no haudin’ us back! | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P" Dieu, cheeky has left her post. Put you pants back on and serve some punters x | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P" I’ve heard of whisky nose but not whisky fingers | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P" That's not a bad malt but my preference if going supermarket is Highland park dragon legend | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P That's not a bad malt but my preference if going supermarket is Highland park dragon legend " It's a comfort thing, first whisky himself got me on. Laphroaig is actually a bit too heavy on the smoke and peat for everyday for me but when I feel like I need a real boost I go for this P | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P Dieu, cheeky has left her post. Put you pants back on and serve some punters x"Does she have to put the pants back on?
P | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P Dieu, cheeky has left her post. Put you pants back on and serve some punters x
Does she have to put the pants back on?
P"Well, they're currently dangling off the mild tap, so, it's a bit inconvenient. I could use them as a bar towel though x | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P Dieu, cheeky has left her post. Put you pants back on and serve some punters x
Does she have to put the pants back on?
P
Well, they're currently dangling off the mild tap, so, it's a bit inconvenient. I could use them as a bar towel though x"See recycle and reuse
P | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P Dieu, cheeky has left her post. Put you pants back on and serve some punters x
Does she have to put the pants back on?
P
Well, they're currently dangling off the mild tap, so, it's a bit inconvenient. I could use them as a bar towel though x"As long as I don’t have to put them back on after! | |||
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"3 fingers of good whisky please, Laphroaig preferably. Been a long day P Dieu, cheeky has left her post. Put you pants back on and serve some punters x
Does she have to put the pants back on?
P
Well, they're currently dangling off the mild tap, so, it's a bit inconvenient. I could use them as a bar towel though x
As long as I don’t have to put them back on after!" only if I get to take the bra off x | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here "Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x"You all simply can’t be left alone can you | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x
You all simply can’t be left alone can you "No. This is actually a classy night out in Barnsley x | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x"Who left? I didn't hwvr Yiu down as a knuckle dragger. Pats were mentod! Ooooooooof | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x
Who left?
I didn't hwvr Yiu down as a knuckle dragger.
Pats were mentod! Ooooooooof"You've had too much! Dieu has git naked. It's warming up! | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here "Debauchery apparently | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Debauchery apparently "You'd better believe it......get off the pool table | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x
Who left?
I didn't hwvr Yiu down as a knuckle dragger.
Pats were mentod! Ooooooooof
You've had too much! Dieu has git naked. It's warming up! "Iv sobered up.  | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x
Who left?
I didn't hwvr Yiu down as a knuckle dragger.
Pats were mentod! Ooooooooof
You've had too much! Dieu has git naked. It's warming up!
Iv sobered up. "It was dieu being naked that did that, right? She's currently lathering herself up in baby oil | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x
Who left?
I didn't hwvr Yiu down as a knuckle dragger.
Pats were mentod! Ooooooooof
You've had too much! Dieu has git naked. It's warming up!
Iv sobered up.
It was dieu being naked that did that, right? She's currently lathering herself up in baby oil "Davie faints! | |||
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"What on earth is going on in here
Black lace has been on, you left, so I'm the bouncer, dieu is serving, and I'm using her pants as a bar towel. Normal Saturday night really x
Who left?
I didn't hwvr Yiu down as a knuckle dragger.
Pats were mentod! Ooooooooof
You've had too much! Dieu has git naked. It's warming up!
Iv sobered up.
It was dieu being naked that did that, right? She's currently lathering herself up in baby oil
Davie faints!"Wait until dieu reads this...she'll kill me  | |||
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"Fifey, behave!!! "Sorry x | |||
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"I hope you’re all feeling rough this morning "• Chance would be a fine thing. You didn't serve me a single drink, despite my request for a Gin. | |||
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"I hope you’re all feeling rough this morning "......oh, my head x | |||
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"I hope you’re all feeling rough this morning "Had one drink then went to bed like a good girl
P | |||
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"I'm a tad rough OP. I blame the barmaid, she kept force beer down my throat. "...err.....it wasn't beer  | |||
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"I hope you’re all feeling rough this morning
•
Chance would be a fine thing. You didn't serve me a single drink, despite my request for a Gin. "Your status  | |||
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"I'm a tad rough OP. I blame the barmaid, she kept force beer down my throat.
...err.....it wasn't beer "(Gasps in shock) | |||
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"I'm a tad rough OP. I blame the barmaid, she kept force beer down my throat.
...err.....it wasn't beer
(Gasps in shock) "It's OK, I've still got her undies, and she's sleeping it off. She got a bit wild | |||
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"I'm a tad rough OP. I blame the barmaid, she kept force beer down my throat.
...err.....it wasn't beer
(Gasps in shock)
It's OK, I've still got her undies, and she's sleeping it off. She got a bit wild "That's those posh burds for you. | |||
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"I'm a tad rough OP. I blame the barmaid, she kept force beer down my throat.
...err.....it wasn't beer
(Gasps in shock)
It's OK, I've still got her undies, and she's sleeping it off. She got a bit wild
That's those posh burds for you. "She had the campari on an empty stomach | |||
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"Just knocking the doors to see if you’re open yes" Closed for urgent repairs to the ceiling | |||
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"I hope you’re all feeling rough this morning
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Chance would be a fine thing. You didn't serve me a single drink, despite my request for a Gin.
Your status "• Doffs cap. | |||
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