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" Just keep in mind it's only fun/play nothing more & move on to the next meet " What she said ^^^^^ | |||
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"I dont if i like her i piss all over her and get her to get a tattoo saying beware of the dog" Admire your style | |||
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"I dont if i like her i piss all over her and get her to get a tattoo saying beware of the dog Admire your style" this is the way | |||
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"There's a really good article I was given a link to about polyamory and jealousy. It's a very interesting read. I know youre not talking about polyamory but the reason behind the jealousy in the article and how to deal with it are still applicable. Not sure if I can post it though. PW " Thanks for sharing it | |||
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"I don't get jealous, truly " This | |||
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"I don't get jealous, truly This " Well, the clue is in your name isn’t it? | |||
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"I don't get jealous, truly This Well, the clue is in your name isn’t it? " | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? " I guess jealousy is caused through lack of communication and therefore inadvertently overstepping boundaries? One person feels neglected or pushed aside maybe?? I think the ultimate Q to ask yourself is 'do you want the other person to be happy' and then figure out how to do that without destroying what you have and with out making yourself unhappy... Its a balance Discussing and setting boundaries definitely helps.. Periodically revisit them - did things change - why etc | |||
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"https://www.morethantwo.com/jealousypractice.html Please delete if not allowed. PW " Thanks for the link, it was a very interesting read | |||
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"I've never felt any jealousy over physical actions, which is what I class swinging as...it's an enjoyable physical act. I wouldn't feel jealous about him playing tennis or going for a walk, so why would I feel jealous about him swinging? Where I do feel jealousy though is with emotional attachment. Not family, friends etc, but romantic emotions...that's my line, I don't share romantic partners emotionally. That's where communication comes in. We talk about what we're both comfortable with, we're honest about how we're feeling, and we will continue to revisit the same discussions and check in with each other as we continue to explore this lifestyle together and experience different things, tweaking our agreed boundaries if we mutually agree that we should. " This is exactly the way we both feel .. | |||
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"I’ve no idea. I couldn’t do it. Is it jealousy though, not wanting to see the person you love with someone else? I wouldn’t call it jealousy. I’d call it pretty standard! " This for me too! I know I couldn’t swing. | |||
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"Also, important to remember that not wanting to think about or see your partner with some neons else is perfectly valid. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re lacking confidence or insecure, some people just don’t want to share their partner and that’s fine too! " I think this is fine if there partner also doesn’t want to be shared, sometimes there is a pressure on one half to suppress themselves in order to keep the other half happy and that’s where cracks will appear. If both people communicate and are open and honest with each other about what works for them we learn to adapt, compromise it’s where complete change is expected from someone I find it never works and often leads the suppressed person to go behind the others back to fulfil needs they don’t get from there current partner. I’ve always found the concept of gaining everything you want or desire from one human difficult to comprehend, whilst I don’t wish to have sexual relations with multiple people a 2/3 person dynamic works for me and I’m forthright about this when meeting people regularly xx | |||
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"https://www.morethantwo.com/jealousypractice.html Please delete if not allowed. PW " That's a great article. Mrs | |||
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"Also, important to remember that not wanting to think about or see your partner with some neons else is perfectly valid. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re lacking confidence or insecure, some people just don’t want to share their partner and that’s fine too! " | |||
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"It is a strange one. If Dora was to flirt with a guy on a vanilla night out I’d be jealous probably but in a club or on fab it’s a turn on for me. I think it has to do with consent and respect. If it’s on a vanilla night out then the guy she’s flirting with wouldn’t know we’re swingers and so wouldn’t have any respect for me as my woman (in his eyes) needs a better man. Also Dora has my consent to play and be admired as a Hotwife when we’re out out although of course she chooses to give me this. " That makes sense to me. | |||
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"Also, important to remember that not wanting to think about or see your partner with some neons else is perfectly valid. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re lacking confidence or insecure, some people just don’t want to share their partner and that’s fine too! I think this is fine if there partner also doesn’t want to be shared, sometimes there is a pressure on one half to suppress themselves in order to keep the other half happy and that’s where cracks will appear. If both people communicate and are open and honest with each other about what works for them we learn to adapt, compromise it’s where complete change is expected from someone I find it never works and often leads the suppressed person to go behind the others back to fulfil needs they don’t get from there current partner. I’ve always found the concept of gaining everything you want or desire from one human difficult to comprehend, whilst I don’t wish to have sexual relations with multiple people a 2/3 person dynamic works for me and I’m forthright about this when meeting people regularly xx" Agree with this, I can’t think of anything worse than someone suppressing themselves, not being true to themselves, to please another. Open honest communication from the start is really important, also gives you an indication if you are on the same page or not. | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? I think the ultimate Q to ask yourself is 'do you want the other person to be happy' and then figure out how to do that without destroying what you have and with out making yourself unhappy... Its a balance " | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? I think the ultimate Q to ask yourself is 'do you want the other person to be happy' and then figure out how to do that without destroying what you have and with out making yourself unhappy... Its a balance " After many years of a sex less marriage I had a girlfriend who I had great uninhibited sex with and she "confessed" to me one night as we were watching mfm porn that she had always fancied a threesome but didn't have the courage to tell her previous partners. It was so refreshing to meet someone with such an health attitude to, enjoying the physical pleasure of sex that I did manage to arrange some mfm threesomes. And it felt wonderful seeing her sucking another guys cock and sucking our two cocks together. Even better seeing other guys cocks fucking her cunt and arse and seeing her really enjoying it. I was in no way jealous.. Quite the opposite it felt so loving to be able to help her maximise her sexuality. She told me she fantasized about being gangbanged as well but unfortunately we never did get around to that. Other non sexual circumstances intervened and we drifted apart and eventually split. But I still remember the incredibly warm loving feeling I felt during the threesomes. Probably the strongest feeling of love I've ever experienced. | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? " I'm going to say something some could view as controversial here OP . they don't get jealous because there getting there own needs meet through the acts they are up to . i think people only get jealous when there not getting what they want when others are . controversial maybe but i really do believe its that simple. | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. " Maybe you're on the wrong site then | |||
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"I thrive on mixed emotions. For example, when Mrs was living out her fantasy of picking up a guy in nightclub. When she messaged to say she's found the one and it's happening, the rush of almost fear and lustful urges was rather very exciting. I feel though that I don't particularly suffer with jealousy, and rather feel envy. " That resonates. Especially the envy rather than jealousy. I confess sometimes there is something selfish inside me. For example when I can't make a night out, party or club night but My Girl can. On one hand I'm really excited for her and want her to fill her boots. On the other hand I really hate missing out sharing that with her. | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then" Much. I don’t get why people linger around in a swinging site with this reply. Do they try to steal other peoples stuff? | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then" Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site " Are you saying you’ve got stuff you’re not sharing ? | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site Are you saying you’ve got stuff you’re not sharing ? " You could have my last rolo though | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site Are you saying you’ve got stuff you’re not sharing ? You could have my last rolo though " Don’t you want me to pop it in your mouth instead? | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site Are you saying you’ve got stuff you’re not sharing ? You could have my last rolo though Don’t you want me to pop it in your mouth instead? " Before or after you’ve eaten the rolo? | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? " I compartmentalise, every thought and feeling has it's own little box in my brain So swinging has a box. Real life has a box etc. Making things more easy for me to deal with my life | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site Are you saying you’ve got stuff you’re not sharing ? You could have my last rolo though Don’t you want me to pop it in your mouth instead? Before or after you’ve eaten the rolo?" I’ll grab your coat for you….. I don’t need mine, I’m feeling a little hot around the collar.. | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site Are you saying you’ve got stuff you’re not sharing ? You could have my last rolo though Don’t you want me to pop it in your mouth instead? Before or after you’ve eaten the rolo? I’ll grab your coat for you….. I don’t need mine, I’m feeling a little hot around the collar.. " Coat! I’m northern. It’s May! | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? I compartmentalise, every thought and feeling has it's own little box in my brain So swinging has a box. Real life has a box etc. Making things more easy for me to deal with my life " I've got to be honest, I thought everyone did this to keep themselves sane and I'm not just talking about swinging but as a way to concentrate on what need to be done at anyone time without letting other problems or tasks interfere with what you are doing or needing to do . I was genuinely surprised to find out a good few years ago that this was not the case . | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site Are you saying you’ve got stuff you’re not sharing ? You could have my last rolo though Don’t you want me to pop it in your mouth instead? Before or after you’ve eaten the rolo? I’ll grab your coat for you….. I don’t need mine, I’m feeling a little hot around the collar.. Coat! I’m northern. It’s May! " my geography is so bad. And there I was ready to go south of the border … …. Nora. Stop it!!!! | |||
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"I don’t share my stuff. Maybe you're on the wrong site then Nah. I don’t either and I’m quite happy with the site Are you saying you’ve got stuff you’re not sharing ? You could have my last rolo though Don’t you want me to pop it in your mouth instead? Before or after you’ve eaten the rolo? I’ll grab your coat for you….. I don’t need mine, I’m feeling a little hot around the collar.. Coat! I’m northern. It’s May! my geography is so bad. And there I was ready to go south of the border … …. Nora. Stop it!!!!" . Your geography is fine. I’m a northerner daaaaan saaaaarf | |||
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"Jealousy isn't an issue we have. To us, it's a physical act that we do with others. It's something we both enjoy and is just an extra, it's not really part of our 'real life', it's almost fantasy life so doesn't impact our 'real life' in any negative way. If we thought that one of us was feeling the emotions for someone else that we feel between ourselves then that would be an issue but we know that won't ever happen. " Sound like you compartmentalise swinging away from your normal life and leave it there after play untill it's time to play again . I do a simular thing as I find it's the only way you can stay sane and balanced in your normal life away from the fun . | |||
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"Jealousy isn't an issue we have. To us, it's a physical act that we do with others. It's something we both enjoy and is just an extra, it's not really part of our 'real life', it's almost fantasy life so doesn't impact our 'real life' in any negative way. If we thought that one of us was feeling the emotions for someone else that we feel between ourselves then that would be an issue but we know that won't ever happen. Sound like you compartmentalise swinging away from your normal life and leave it there after play untill it's time to play again . I do a simular thing as I find it's the only way you can stay sane and balanced in your normal life away from the fun ." Yes that's a good way of putting it actually. | |||
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"I don't get jealousy. I once was part of group sex in a club when the wife got very jealous and stormed out of the room in tears. It was embarrassing. They should of stopped swinging there and then but I saw them in the club again a few weeks later. The woman ignored me and the husband gave me a lovely smile when the wife wasn't looking. It's really sad actually and it wasn't fair on me at all. People like that shouldn't be swinging, end of." | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? " If one is jealous, not sure swinging is going to help. Unless youre one of those "face your fears" types. | |||
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"I've never been the jealous type since my very 1st relationship. To me jealousy partly stems from insecurities within! - find your self worth - know u cannot claim anyone for yourself. Its their choice if they want you & you only - learn to let go. (Things don't workout, oh well & move on) Those are just a few examples of how I deal with jealousy when it pokes its ugly head lol " Well, going by the above, you have said you don't get jealous but then said what you do to deal with your feelings of jealousy.... I'm confused | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? " If boundaries and limits are drawn and respected then this shouldn’t be an issue. Once one start to step outside these then it’s natural to get jealous feelings. | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? " Me and my partner are very secure in our relationship and we trust each other completely. We're also very open with each other and can talk to each about anything. There's nothing in the swinging world that can unsettle that so there's nothing to be jealous about. I'm happy for her to go and enjoy herself and she feels the same about me. | |||
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"Discuss what may be a trigger or specific things that have made you feel insecure and avoid those situations. Dora can’t stand the thought of me even thinking of another woman. I’ve seen her spit roasted without a hint of jealousy yet I got all touchy once when she affectionately stroked a guys leg. You can never tell. " Same.. For me it's nothing sexual at all. It's the more intimate stuff. Happened to me once but once I'd processed it... It made everything so much more intense... Quickened the pulse. | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? I compartmentalise, every thought and feeling has it's own little box in my brain So swinging has a box. Real life has a box etc. Making things more easy for me to deal with my life " I use this method also.. | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? " Above all things you're a team. Talk to eachother. If necessary and it can't be resolved... Stop. | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? I'm going to say something some could view as controversial here OP . they don't get jealous because there getting there own needs meet through the acts they are up to . i think people only get jealous when there not getting what they want when others are . controversial maybe but i really do believe its that simple. " we met a couple at a party and after a short time it became obvious that they were only interested in sandy, I got jealous and felt left out and forced us to change what we looked for .all is good now after a good chat Dan | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? " with difficulty | |||
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"How do people control their jealousy when swinging? with difficulty " Yep, although it partly depends of the personalities and mindsets of the individuals in that relationship. The best way is communication and complete openness to each other on how you feel and what you want (as an individual as well as a couple). It's hard sometimes but that exposure, openness and mutual understanding brings you closer as a couple. I think it's a vehicle that brings many swinging couples far closer together than many vanilla couples. Because it really doesn't work unless you can truly be open and understand each others inner workings. So swinging can be hard in a relationship but as long as its benefits and enjoyment outweigh the work and difficulties then you keep doing it. | |||
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