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"Sometimes it annoys me, sometimes it doesn't, sometimes I use it myself. I don't know what the difference is. I see your point and sort of agree. I'm not a girl but I can be part of a group of girls sometimes, like the Boots here come the girls campaign thingy. I dunno. I'm rambling." Lol go and sit in the corner with your finger on your lip until you can speak sense | |||
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"The times when I feel disquiet is when it is used in discussions about sex amongst people who are a long way from childhood themselves. Saying I'm going shopping with the girls is one thing. Saying I have three girls waiting in my hotel room and I'm going to fuck them all over is another... And I know that the people who use it are not in anyway considering underage sex. I just don't think it is appropriate in a sexual connotation." Bad case of selectivism young lady. So when your with a guy hes taking you and your lady friends upstairs for a shag but the next day when he treats you all to lunch hes treating you and the girlslol | |||
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" And I know that the people who use it are not in anyway considering underage sex. I just don't think it is appropriate in a sexual connotation." Well you have changed your tune for the sake of argument. The reason this started was because you said, and I quote "As far as I am aware the forum rules do not allow discussions about underage sex. So for fecks sake call us women not girls" That is why I stood up and defended myself, and for no other reason. If you don't like the word fine, just like many things context is everything, and I was in no way using it in a derogatory way. Just using it as I would face to face with any girl. | |||
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" Bad case of selectivism young lady. So when your with a guy hes taking you and your lady friends upstairs for a shag but the next day when he treats you all to lunch hes treating you and the girlslol" The selectivism is my point Diamond, it makes me feel uncomfortable when used in conjunction with sexual discussions, not in non sexual ones. Although some do used it as a subjugating word to infantilise women and devalue them/their opinions. The Australian parliament is having a major debate about acceptable ways in which to refer to women at the moment... | |||
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"Who feels uncomfortable when the word 'girl' is used in discussions on sites like this? I feel a genuine unease when people discuss what kind of girl they prefer. By definition all of the females on the site are women, not girls. And if the underage connotation is not there then there is sometimes a patronising connotation. So, as an unreconstructed feminist, can I campaign for a full cease and desist of use of the word girl on sex sites! " I think girl is a nice word, it's more personal than woman. "She's a lovely girl," sounds far more appealing than, "she's a lovely woman." IMHO. | |||
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"Who feels uncomfortable when the word 'girl' is used in discussions on sites like this? I feel a genuine unease when people discuss what kind of girl they prefer. By definition all of the females on the site are women, not girls. And if the underage connotation is not there then there is sometimes a patronising connotation. So, as an unreconstructed feminist, can I campaign for a full cease and desist of use of the word girl on sex sites! " To answer your question and to not go off-topic... not me: I feel no discomfort with it. I believe it's normal practice. | |||
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" Bad case of selectivism young lady. So when your with a guy hes taking you and your lady friends upstairs for a shag but the next day when he treats you all to lunch hes treating you and the girlslol The selectivism is my point Diamond, it makes me feel uncomfortable when used in conjunction with sexual discussions, not in non sexual ones. Although some do used it as a subjugating word to infantilise women and devalue them/their opinions. The Australian parliament is having a major debate about acceptable ways in which to refer to women at the moment..." You tell 'em - Go Girl! ermmm Sheila! | |||
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" I think girl is a nice word, it's more personal than woman. "She's a lovely girl," sounds far more appealing than, "she's a lovely woman." IMHO." And how would you feel if you knew that you were being regularly referred to as a lovely boy? (this is not an attack, this is a genuine request for your opinion) | |||
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"And as I keep saying the context in which I don't feel it is appropriate is in discussions about sex on sex sites. The connotation with underage sex is the primary issue." So, if i had a 'girl'friend and was to post on here that she enjoyed having sex with me, you would take that to mean an unlawful act had occurred? | |||
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" I think girl is a nice word, it's more personal than woman. "She's a lovely girl," sounds far more appealing than, "she's a lovely woman." IMHO. And how would you feel if you knew that you were being regularly referred to as a lovely boy? (this is not an attack, this is a genuine request for your opinion)" Its not used like girl is, as we have the word 'guy' that people like to use that has no comparable for the female gender and is a half way house. Maybe 'gal'? But really slang for the same word... | |||
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" I think girl is a nice word, it's more personal than woman. "She's a lovely girl," sounds far more appealing than, "she's a lovely woman." IMHO. And how would you feel if you knew that you were being regularly referred to as a lovely boy? (this is not an attack, this is a genuine request for your opinion)" It wouldn't bother me in the slightest, although I'm 47 years old so I'd probably suggest the person saying it visits specsavers. | |||
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"think you could be over thinking this, its a word same as woman makes no odds to me. ive never once thought negativily to the word. if people have to becareful how they use every word noone would speak" Well said. It is already a nightmare trying to have a conversation in a professional setting because of people finding offence and connotations, and common sense goes out the window. You can no longer have a 'brainstorming' session because somebody with too much time on their hands decided that this had connotations of mental illness or some such nonsense. It is now a 'thought shower' in schools, I believe. Too far! | |||
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" It wouldn't bother me in the slightest, although I'm 47 years old so I'd probably suggest the person saying it visits specsavers. " But would you refer to a woman the same age as you as a lovely girl? | |||
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"Well ive decided, im way to naive for this site and ive been thinking about this now. I like being called girl, because it makes me smile cause when you get to my age you dont get called it very often. My son is 22 if he said he had met a nice girl last night and had sex with her i would think it more normal than saying woman. It would never enter my head if someone referred to someone as a girl on here that they ment someone under age. Being a fellow woman id like to back you tempting as its mostly men answering but i cant on this one " Exactly, if i had a partner i would refer to her as my 'girl'friend, as i feel that 'lady'friend or 'woman'friend sounds as if i've hired her for the night! | |||
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"The times when I feel disquiet is when it is used in discussions about sex amongst people who are a long way from childhood themselves. Saying I'm going shopping with the girls is one thing. Saying I have three girls waiting in my hotel room and I'm going to fuck them all over is another... And I know that the people who use it are not in anyway considering underage sex. I just don't think it is appropriate in a sexual connotation." This I agree with, in general. It depends a little on the person and the context but mostly the use of girl with sexual connotations does bother me. If nothing else, if you're considering having sex with someone it would be nice if they regarded you as an adult rather than as a silly, soppy, potentially inexperienced being, which using girl rather than woman or lady suggests to me. For shopping type fun, dining fun, evenings in fun and similar, girl is fine. For sex, call me a woman or a lady, please. | |||
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"I'm not expecting or asking anyone to back me. As the title says I was just wondering if I was alone in this way of thinking. These discussions have drawn my attention to the fact that there are fewer ways to refer to women informally without being unpleasant than there are about men: bloke, fella, guy etc as opposed to ? What is there? Lass, gal, lady? None of them as easy to use so it seems we fall back on using girl. Which, IMHO, isn't as flexible as the variation we have for men. And gets up my nose as.previously discussed..." thats not what you said. you said you didnt like the use of it on sites like this not that it got up your nose in general. ive lost track on this thread now | |||
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"I'm not expecting or asking anyone to back me. As the title says I was just wondering if I was alone in this way of thinking. These discussions have drawn my attention to the fact that there are fewer ways to refer to women informally without being unpleasant than there are about men: bloke, fella, guy etc as opposed to ? What is there? Lass, gal, lady? None of them as easy to use so it seems we fall back on using girl. Which, IMHO, isn't as flexible as the variation we have for men. And gets up my nose as.previously discussed...thats not what you said. you said you didnt like the use of it on sites like this not that it got up your nose in general. ive lost track on this thread now" Hmmm...does appear the OP is saying something different to her opening post. | |||
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"I'm not expecting or asking anyone to back me. As the title says I was just wondering if I was alone in this way of thinking. These discussions have drawn my attention to the fact that there are fewer ways to refer to women informally without being unpleasant than there are about men: bloke, fella, guy etc as opposed to ? What is there? Lass, gal, lady? None of them as easy to use so it seems we fall back on using girl. Which, IMHO, isn't as flexible as the variation we have for men. And gets up my nose as.previously discussed...thats not what you said. you said you didnt like the use of it on sites like this not that it got up your nose in general. ive lost track on this thread now Hmmm...does appear the OP is saying something different to her opening post." Maybe she's working through her thoughts as the thread progresses and gaining a clearer understanding of her thinking and feelings about this. I can't know, obviously, so that's just a possible explanation that occurs to me. I often refine my thoughts, feelings and ideas as I discuss them with others. | |||
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"Who feels uncomfortable when the word 'girl' is used in discussions on sites like this? I feel a genuine unease when people discuss what kind of girl they prefer. By definition all of the females on the site are women, not girls. And if the underage connotation is not there then there is sometimes a patronising connotation. So, as an unreconstructed feminist, can I campaign for a full cease and desist of use of the word girl on sex sites! " I'm with you. I think 'girl' is a creepy/ condescending word to use in a sexual way. In day to day chat it's fine. | |||
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"Who feels uncomfortable when the word 'girl' is used in discussions on sites like this? I feel a genuine unease when people discuss what kind of girl they prefer. By definition all of the females on the site are women, not girls. And if the underage connotation is not there then there is sometimes a patronising connotation. So, as an unreconstructed feminist, can I campaign for a full cease and desist of use of the word girl on sex sites! " OMG!! Just thought it was me. I hate the term 'lady' too. When I've asked guys not to say it they state that they are trying to be polite which is a lovely sentiment but also suggests that the word 'woman' is somehow wrong, rude and to be avoided. Why? I'm happy and proud to be a WOMAN!! | |||
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"Well ive decided, im way to naive for this site and ive been thinking about this now. I like being called girl, because it makes me smile cause when you get to my age you dont get called it very often. My son is 22 if he said he had met a nice girl last night and had sex with her i would think it more normal than saying woman. It would never enter my head if someone referred to someone as a girl on here that they ment someone under age. Being a fellow woman id like to back you tempting as its mostly men answering but i cant on this one Exactly, if i had a partner i would refer to her as my 'girl'friend, as i feel that 'lady'friend or 'woman'friend sounds as if i've hired her for the night!" | |||
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"Who feels uncomfortable when the word 'girl' is used in discussions on sites like this? I feel a genuine unease when people discuss what kind of girl they prefer. " I have to agree with the OP. While it's quite ok to refer to ourselves as "girls" in the general walk of life, and between friends, there are some places that it's really out of place. For example, it shouldn't be used in the workplace, especially between people of different grades... or anywhere formal. In the very specific context of being here on a sex contact site (as the OP did say!) it can easily cause offence, or at the very least break a line of contact. It also disturbs me because there are people on here, men and women, who are looking for girls, in the underage context of the word - I get several contacts hinting at it each year and quickly tell them where to go - and it's sickening when it happens... So, no, I don't think that it's right to use the word at all here - because when it comes down to it, this is just a sex site, not a social network. | |||
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"Who feels uncomfortable when the word 'girl' is used in discussions on sites like this? I feel a genuine unease when people discuss what kind of girl they prefer. I have to agree with the OP. While it's quite ok to refer to ourselves as "girls" in the general walk of life, and between friends, there are some places that it's really out of place. For example, it shouldn't be used in the workplace, especially between people of different grades... or anywhere formal. In the very specific context of being here on a sex contact site (as the OP did say!) it can easily cause offence, or at the very least break a line of contact. It also disturbs me because there are people on here, men and women, who are looking for girls, in the underage context of the word - I get several contacts hinting at it each year and quickly tell them where to go - and it's sickening when it happens... So, no, I don't think that it's right to use the word at all here - because when it comes down to it, this is just a sex site, not a social network. " the main problem with this is its not a sex site you may use it as a sex site but to each there own i use the site to socialise with freinds and hopefully get more contacts freindly or otherwise back to ops point you dont like the use of the word "girl" inform people you dont like it i am sure they wont use that word with you | |||
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"I couldn't refer to a women I find attractive as a girl, for me the word women means so much more. I certainly would never entertain any suggestion of a ban on the word 'girl' on this type of site, but it simply does not form part of my language when I describe someone i feel genuinely attraction to who I consider a respected equal. Language is important, in my mind there is a very big difference between a girl and a women. (I am in no way referring to the underage aspect of the discussion). " Couldn't agree more about language being important. | |||
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"^^ How about Ma'am (as in Jam and not smarm) ? " The last time that happened I was being questioned by security at JFK. | |||
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"^^ How about Ma'am (as in Jam and not smarm) ? " i really like that and the use of the word 'sir' when I lived in the USA, there were very few things I liked but I did like the respect that is shown from younger to older family members | |||
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"Who feels uncomfortable when the word 'girl' is used in discussions on sites like this? I feel a genuine unease when people discuss what kind of girl they prefer. By definition all of the females on the site are women, not girls. And if the underage connotation is not there then there is sometimes a patronising connotation. So, as an unreconstructed feminist, can I campaign for a full cease and desist of use of the word girl on sex sites! " My _iew is that women are called - and call themselves - things on here that I find far more offensive than 'girl' | |||
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" My _iew is that women are called - and call themselves - things on here that I find far more offensive than 'girl' " . Too true! | |||
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"Context, tone and intent. All we have on here is some context, maybe a hint of tone and a guess at intent. Personally, I think it is mostly derogatory to refer to women as girls. The fact that it is a norm and subconscious speaks volumes on sexual equality. " Totally agree, well put. | |||
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"Fuck me I didn't realise there were so many anal people on here! Don't call me babes, hun, love and now girl! et a grip ffs and get a life everyone knows its over 18's on here so stop all the drama queen shit ladies. " I'll strop my drama queen shit as long as people keep stropping their misogynistic, casual dismissal of women. That solves it, don't call me hun, babes, sexi, girl or lady, just call me Your Majesty. | |||
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"Fuck me I didn't realise there were so many anal people on here! Don't call me babes, hun, love and now girl! et a grip ffs and get a life everyone knows its over 18's on here so stop all the drama queen shit ladies. " drama queens shit ladies here, I am indignant that guys are left out of this...... | |||
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"Fuck me I didn't realise there were so many anal people on here! Don't call me babes, hun, love and now girl! et a grip ffs and get a life everyone knows its over 18's on here so stop all the drama queen shit ladies. I'll strop my drama queen shit as long as people keep stropping their misogynistic, casual dismissal of women. That solves it, don't call me hun, babes, sexi, girl or lady, just call me Your Majesty." Her Anal Heinyness | |||
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"Fuck me I didn't realise there were so many anal people on here! Don't call me babes, hun, love and now girl! et a grip ffs and get a life everyone knows its over 18's on here so stop all the drama queen shit ladies. I'll strop my drama queen shit as long as people keep stropping their misogynistic, casual dismissal of women. That solves it, don't call me hun, babes, sexi, girl or lady, just call me Your Majesty. Her Anal Heinyness" I'll accept HAH(!) for short. | |||
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"Fuck me I didn't realise there were so many anal people on here! Don't call me babes, hun, love and now girl! et a grip ffs and get a life everyone knows its over 18's on here so stop all the drama queen shit ladies. " the fact that we're mature women means we're going to have mature opinions. If you think its drama queen shit that's your prerogative but I think it possibly makes the first two words of your post less likely to happen | |||
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