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"I've been watching some stuff on YouTube and I'm shocked by how invested these people become and how difficult it is to get them to believe that the person they're talking to isn't who they say they are." I'd like to watch that too if you care to share links please ! Maybe con artists are most sophisticated manipulators out there? There must be some gaslighting involved and picking people who would feed of this kind of blind loyalty/dedication. | |||
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"I've been watching some stuff on YouTube and I'm shocked by how invested these people become and how difficult it is to get them to believe that the person they're talking to isn't who they say they are. I'd like to watch that too if you care to share links please ! Maybe con artists are most sophisticated manipulators out there? There must be some gaslighting involved and picking people who would feed of this kind of blind loyalty/dedication. " I was mostly old episodes of Dr Phil (don't judge me ). I'll post up a link layer to one I found particularly awful. The woman was recently widowed and was preyed on by a scammer.
When Mr Ns stepfather was widowed he suddenly began getting contact from young, pretty women in foreign countries. Fortunately we had access to his social media and warned him | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow " It's absolutely despicable | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow It's absolutely despicable" It is. He does actually exist in the form he's represented himself which is unusual but he can't leave his wife of course... | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow " Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas | |||
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"Have you watched the Tinder Swindler on Netflix. It shows you how awful people can be" No I haven't. I might have a look at some point | |||
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"Have you watched the Tinder Swindler on Netflix. It shows you how awful people can be No I haven't. I might have a look at some point" I watched it last night….very shocking indeed | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas "He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car... | |||
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"Have you watched the Tinder Swindler on Netflix. It shows you how awful people can be No I haven't. I might have a look at some point" It's a really good doc. Inventing Anna is of similar nature but I think it's not as pleasant viewing. Just seen two episodes and I find this type of series hard to digest. Lots of eye rolling. | |||
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"Have you watched the Tinder Swindler on Netflix. It shows you how awful people can be No I haven't. I might have a look at some point" It's worth a look. Shows how genuine people really arent | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car..."What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands? | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?"She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely". | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely". "God that's so sad | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely". "Some people settle for a very little substitute of what love truly should be. Sad indeed. | |||
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"It's a whole different form of cat pishing with monetary value. I almost got caught out on POF some years ago, top of the range iPhone at that time. Story along lines of he was in USA armed forces and weren't allowed Mobile phones. I looked further into this and that's absolutely not true. The quickness of the messages and love poems (boak) raised my suspicions and I copied and pasted some of the content to find they had done exactly the same as me. Came off POF then. Re joined and its no different - just need to look at a images and wording of text and be on guard. I've no money anyhoo (I'm not orientated by it), so they'd have a difficult time trying pmsl. " There’s tons of those type of profiles on FBook. They reply to women’s comments saying they love their profile and asking them to send a friend request. They are fishing for any responses and work it down from there I guess. Also seen lots of young attractive women’s profiles that reply to men’s comments just saying ‘hi’ or ‘hello’ but probably for the same reasons.  | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely". "That last sentence is one of the main reasons it happens. They prey on those type of people unfortunately. I’ll never understand how people respond to this kind of attention with money, so I’ll comment no further | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely".
That last sentence is one of the main reasons it happens. They prey on those type of people unfortunately. I’ll never understand how people respond to this kind of attention with money, so I’ll comment no further "Me neither. I watched the tinder swindler last night and I must admit I had trouble finding any sympathy for those women. | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely".
That last sentence is one of the main reasons it happens. They prey on those type of people unfortunately. I’ll never understand how people respond to this kind of attention with money, so I’ll comment no further
Me neither. I watched the tinder swindler last night and I must admit I had trouble finding any sympathy for those women. "Why? | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely".
That last sentence is one of the main reasons it happens. They prey on those type of people unfortunately. I’ll never understand how people respond to this kind of attention with money, so I’ll comment no further
Me neither. I watched the tinder swindler last night and I must admit I had trouble finding any sympathy for those women. "I’ve yet to watch it, but think I’ll find myself asking them out loud, at the TV ‘why? Why do you do that? What are doing?’ that’s the polite version | |||
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"It's a whole different form of cat pishing with monetary value. I almost got caught out on POF some years ago, top of the range iPhone at that time. Story along lines of he was in USA armed forces and weren't allowed Mobile phones. I looked further into this and that's absolutely not true. The quickness of the messages and love poems (boak) raised my suspicions and I copied and pasted some of the content to find they had done exactly the same as me. Came off POF then. Re joined and its no different - just need to look at a images and wording of text and be on guard. I've no money anyhoo (I'm not orientated by it), so they'd have a difficult time trying pmsl. There’s tons of those type of profiles on FBook. They reply to women’s comments saying they love their profile and asking them to send a friend request. They are fishing for any responses and work it down from there I guess. Also seen lots of young attractive women’s profiles that reply to men’s comments just saying ‘hi’ or ‘hello’ but probably for the same reasons. "Yep, had that too -had to basically lock my FBook account to stop that happening. The behaviour is also similar on Insta with the friend request but their account is locked, they follow thousands of people but onky a handful follow them. Immediate red flag. | |||
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 I am usually kind and empathic, but not with this I’m afraid.
Hope that doesn’t sound too awful | |||
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"One of the things I really dislike about myself at the moment - and I’m just being honest - is that I feel really impatient towards people who have fallen foul of these scams. I don’t understand how they could let it happen, unless elderly and not in full possession of their faculties. My best friend recommended I watch Tinder Swindler, but I knew it would only wind me up so didn’t. I am usually kind and empathic, but not with this I’m afraid.
Hope that doesn’t sound too awful "People are vulnerable for all kinds of things and this is how these scammers work they work on loneliness and vulnerability. | |||
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"One of the things I really dislike about myself at the moment - and I’m just being honest - is that I feel really impatient towards people who have fallen foul of these scams. I don’t understand how they could let it happen, unless elderly and not in full possession of their faculties. My best friend recommended I watch Tinder Swindler, but I knew it would only wind me up so didn’t. I am usually kind and empathic, but not with this I’m afraid.
Hope that doesn’t sound too awful "I dont think it sounds too awful as it is extremely difficult to understand how people can be controlled. The Tinder Swindler was glammed up, watching it I was thinking 'What your'e taking out a loan for him!' serves you right. But on reflection, they were women that were subject to coercive control and deserving of sympathy. If he had been a 'woman beater' im sure there would have been instant empathy from me and everybody. But that doesnt make for popular tv. Another one worth a watch on Netflix is the 'puppetmaster' its as interesting, mind bogling and tragic as you can get. Some people just have that ability to manipulate others no matter how 'together' they may seem. Very dangerous people. | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely".
That last sentence is one of the main reasons it happens. They prey on those type of people unfortunately. I’ll never understand how people respond to this kind of attention with money, so I’ll comment no further
Me neither. I watched the tinder swindler last night and I must admit I had trouble finding any sympathy for those women.
Why? "I don’t know the answer to that. Maybe I’m not vulnerable. I’ve no idea. I spent the whole time thinking what the hell are you doing?? I’m not saying I don’t have sympathy for the elderly and vulnerable. It’s a scum of the earth thing to do but those two women just saw his lifestyle and money and got drawn in. They wouldn’t have met him if he worked in Tesco’s! I didn’t enjoy the programme I thought it was boring and predicable. | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely".
That last sentence is one of the main reasons it happens. They prey on those type of people unfortunately. I’ll never understand how people respond to this kind of attention with money, so I’ll comment no further
Me neither. I watched the tinder swindler last night and I must admit I had trouble finding any sympathy for those women.
Why?
I don’t know the answer to that. Maybe I’m not vulnerable. I’ve no idea. I spent the whole time thinking what the hell are you doing??
I’m not saying I don’t have sympathy for the elderly and vulnerable. It’s a scum of the earth thing to do but those two women just saw his lifestyle and money and got drawn in. They wouldn’t have met him if he worked in Tesco’s! I didn’t enjoy the programme I thought it was boring and predicable. "*predictable | |||
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"An older friend has sold everything including her marital home to send money over a period of about 25 years to a younger waiter she met on holiday shortly after she was made a widow Oh wow.. and BTW no judgment about trash TV I used to watch 90 days wedding or whatever it was called. Not the same but I wonder if any of those survive or were just used for visas
He didn't want to live here, he's married and can't leave his wife for various ridiculous reasons. He did however need money for medical bills, farm machinery, house repairs, a car...
What did she get out of it ? Apart from his verbal gratitude I guess ? And more demands?
She felt loved. My mum talked to her about it and tried to help her but she just said "you don't know what it's like to be lonely".
That last sentence is one of the main reasons it happens. They prey on those type of people unfortunately. I’ll never understand how people respond to this kind of attention with money, so I’ll comment no further
Me neither. I watched the tinder swindler last night and I must admit I had trouble finding any sympathy for those women.
Why?
I don’t know the answer to that. Maybe I’m not vulnerable. I’ve no idea. I spent the whole time thinking what the hell are you doing??
I’m not saying I don’t have sympathy for the elderly and vulnerable. It’s a scum of the earth thing to do but those two women just saw his lifestyle and money and got drawn in. They wouldn’t have met him if he worked in Tesco’s! I didn’t enjoy the programme I thought it was boring and predicable. "Greed does play a part in some of these scams, that's another vulnerability that they exploit. Lots of them present as having a good lifestyle and potential access to money that they need help to get hold of. I haven't watched Tinder Swindler but some of the stuff I have watched I wonder why these women in their 60s and 70s think well set up, attractive, young men are interested in them. Hell I question why younger men are interested in me on here and I know that's just sex! Their vulnerability is probably partly vanity | |||
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"Most will know the story of what happened to my son, only a tiny few know where his depression came from. Andrew at the age of 14 inherited part of a lottery jackpot win, this happened at a time when because of his mother poisoning him against me I'd moved to Australia. I lived there for 10yrs until he found out his mother's lies and contacted me... I moved back instantly to be his Dad once again. I never wanted anything to do with his money and he was told never to spend more than £10 on presents for me, this was because not only did I not want him to think I only saw him as a cash cow but I could see that growing up without my grounded guidance his 23yr old "look at me" attitude would attract the wrong types. After a few girls who were obviously gold diggers with sad stories he met a girl from Leicester. Butter wouldn't melt or so 1st impressions led me to believe but what I know now I didn't at the time, she was an addict of crack amongst other substances who's addictions came with many associated convictions... My son was immature in many ways but perhaps like me his humour hid many demons, I was 1st alerted to her ways when after a simple argument he spent £12,000 on a car just to say sorry. I'd always told him to not to tell of his good fortune to anyone but this advice he never listened too, she'd already moved in by the time he'd bought her the car and she'd already introduced him to her addictions, maybe he'd experimented before I've no idea but without me knowing he now had a regular habit, while he was buying she was happy to stay. Of course I had no idea of what was going on but as his father I could see changes in his attitude, I suspected addiction but it was something he was never going to admit and didn't until his life hung by a thread twice inside a month a few months later. Prior to these hospitalizations she left him, to be honest although I had no idea of her influence on his new lifestyle I saw it as a good thing as I grown to intensely dislike her... something about her demeanour screamed at me she was no good. Her parting gift was to make a hideously false accusation about him to the police, when he told me of this I didn't believe it from the get go as her story was so unbelievable and full of holes, my advice to him was not to worry and any court would see right through it. He was arrested and questioned by officers who didn't believe it either but due to the nature of her accusation had to follow procedures. Weeks went by when one day I was in his house which is now mine chatting with my son, the front door was knocked and as I was sitting in the front kitchen I heard the conversation clearly. Her brothers were there threatening him but saying all he had to do was to pay her £100,000 and she'd drop the charges, their laughter confirmed to me that these charges were nothing but lies. What I then did in reflex any father would've done... After his later hospitalizations I'm proud to say he got over his addiction but the depression had already took its hold and toll to the extent he ended his own life. She's had a string of convictions since and is now in jail for a short stay for car theft. Her attempts at extortion were so shameful to him it fed a depression I knew little of and this was all too much for him to take. I seek no attention but apparently it's therapeutic to share this kinda thing. " I’m so sorry that this happened to your son, such a tragic story . Sending hugs and hope life will sort her out | |||
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" I seek no attention but apparently it's therapeutic to share this kinda thing. " I'm genuinely sorry for your loss- you show real strength sharing this & I hope it is therapeutic to discuss it. I hope you have some good memories of your boy to help drown out the sad ones. Sending you a hug xx | |||
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