FabSwingers.com forum: From then until now

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Sat here chilling out to a bit of PF.

It always makes me nostalgic.

When I started on Fab, I was married (we are no longer together) and we had rules such as no kissing, no full sex with someone else.

It was very limiting. Now, with a new partner, there is very little we wouldn't do other than a few things.

Have you found that your limits and boundaries have been stripped away as you discover your own fab journey? Are you now doing things you never dreamt possible when you first joined?

Have you always stuck to those limits and never waivered because it's exactly how you like it to be?

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By *otwifeHusbandCouple
over a year ago

Dorset

That’s a really good question

We have broken the rules we first set only because we alway said no bareback but sadly some men don’t listen and before I know it he’s balls deap and I’m like ?? , really hard when your in the mix of excitement etc , but I wasn’t happy

And we have a couple we’ve been chatting to for months we’ve meet loads for drink , but they are bareback so if we was to have a play date we would have broken the rule , we know there history so it would only be with them

Hotwife

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi

That’s a really good question

Hotwife "

Interesting. I often wonder if I'll break any of my limits in the heat of things

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By *urplechesterCouple
over a year ago

chester

Great post

... we’ve recently tweeked a few of our rules, and I quite like that tbh! I think as long as it’s discussed before anything happens, and both agree then happy days. But we definitely have areas where we think differently to when we first started on here!

Miss pc

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By *athyperkinsCouple
over a year ago

lifton

We're only looking for mm and ff. I can't see myself ever being comfortable being with a man other than S and certainly wouldn't cope with him being with another woman so I would say those rules will stay. T

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Great post

Miss pc"

Yeah I've definitely evolved as the years have gone by on Fab

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We're only looking for mm and ff. I can't see myself ever being comfortable being with a man other than S and certainly wouldn't cope with him being with another woman so I would say those rules will stay. T"

We all need to find the comfortable ground. There are still definitely things I won't do and I have no intention of changing that x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bump!

Probably posted this a little late last night.

Anyone else changed how they started on here?

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

You've been through quite a journey on here OP, it's interesting to read.

When I first joined I was very much only wanting casual encounters.

And then I met my fiancé. We didn't have rules as such bar being very honest and open with each other, letting the other know what's going on. Trust and communication.

Now I'm embracing being demi and poly. My fiancé is happy as long as I'm happy. So we don't really have any rules but showing each other respect. I can understand why people do, it's about what works for you as a couple.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You've been through quite a journey on here OP, it's interesting to read.

When I first joined I was very much only wanting casual encounters.

And then I met my fiancé. We didn't have rules as such bar being very honest and open with each other, letting the other know what's going on. Trust and communication.

Thank you Meli.

My life's been pretty turbulent at times hence the hiatus from Fab.

It definitely seems that some people evolve as they find out more about themselves. I was certainly far more innocent at the start and have learned a LOT about myself through the years.

PNG x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am continually finding new boundries. I am very fortunate to know a very sassy lady who knows me better than I know myself. Looking forward to the next challenge

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I am continually finding new boundries. I am very fortunate to know a very sassy lady who knows me better than I know myself. Looking forward to the next challenge

Do you enjoy pushing these boundaries? Have you found it sometimes confirms your original limits?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

We have more or less the same rules but we are now soft swap not full.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the biggest thing I do differently is that both my wife and I prefer to meet others separately. We started out as steadfast couples only, and we’d only be in the same room.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We have more or less the same rules but we are now soft swap not full. "

Evolving again. It's clear that things can change all the time. Good communication must be a key factor for many couples.

It does make me wonder how singles evolve too. If they too have the same evolution process on here

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

For me it is boundaries getting tested & pushed, with no pressure just when I’m ready as I get comfortable with certain thoughts. They will keep on moving with trust in those I’m with.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think the biggest thing I do differently is that both my wife and I prefer to meet others separately. We started out as steadfast couples only, and we’d only be in the same room."

Did this happen with continuing trust and eventually recognition that maybe both of you wanted slightly different things?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting thread .

I became single this time last year after 17 years together . I spent time alone before ‘ traditional dating’ which I either wasn’t ready for or it just bored me . Jury’s out on that one.

Now ? Met a couple of men . On the whole , they want sex and ignore until they get horny again .

Now just looking to fulfil a couple of fantasies before I decide my next moves !

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"For me it is boundaries getting tested & pushed, with no pressure just when I’m ready as I get comfortable with certain thoughts. They will keep on moving with trust in those I’m with. "

I would guess it's easier with a regular partner, similar to those couples who have trust in their other half

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think the biggest thing I do differently is that both my wife and I prefer to meet others separately. We started out as steadfast couples only, and we’d only be in the same room.

Did this happen with continuing trust and eventually recognition that maybe both of you wanted slightly different things? "

Neither really, it evolved from the difficulty in finding couples where all were compatible and attracted enough to indulge together as a group.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Husband and I started slow and cautious as we didn't know ourselves at the time how we'd feel about one thing or another. As the time went - the boundaries got widened and opened up with some rules we had initiated being scrapped for good.

We're at the stage now where we're comfortable with where we've settled and don't want to push those boundaries any further.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Interesting thread .

I became single this time last year after 17 years together . I spent time alone before ‘ traditional dating’ which I either wasn’t ready for or it just bored me . Jury’s out on that one.

Now ? Met a couple of men . On the whole , they want sex and ignore until they get horny again .

Now just looking to fulfil a couple of fantasies before I decide my next moves !

So you're open to more when you feel ready.

I'm not sure I could date traditionally anymore if I was single. It would be hard to bring up my sexual interests without lots of apologies first and forewarnings

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think the biggest thing I do differently is that both my wife and I prefer to meet others separately. We started out as steadfast couples only, and we’d only be in the same room.

Did this happen with continuing trust and eventually recognition that maybe both of you wanted slightly different things?

Neither really, it evolved from the difficulty in finding couples where all were compatible and attracted enough to indulge together as a group. "

I get this as a couple. The odds are pretty stacked against 4 all agreeing that they are attracted to the other 3

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"For me it is boundaries getting tested & pushed, with no pressure just when I’m ready as I get comfortable with certain thoughts. They will keep on moving with trust in those I’m with.

I would guess it's easier with a regular partner, similar to those couples who have trust in their other half "

Not necessarily, I don’t have one but friendships build and from that comes trust that allows me to say ok let’s do this, both male & female.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Interesting thread .

I became single this time last year after 17 years together . I spent time alone before ‘ traditional dating’ which I either wasn’t ready for or it just bored me . Jury’s out on that one.

Now ? Met a couple of men . On the whole , they want sex and ignore until they get horny again .

Now just looking to fulfil a couple of fantasies before I decide my next moves !

So you're open to more when you feel ready.

I'm not sure I could date traditionally anymore if I was single. It would be hard to bring up my sexual interests without lots of apologies first and forewarnings

Literally my entire issue ! And you can’t bring it up without them thinking ‘ sex on tap here’

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Husband and I started slow and cautious as we didn't know ourselves at the time how we'd feel about one thing or another. As the time went - the boundaries got widened and opened up with some rules we had initiated being scrapped for good.

We're at the stage now where we're comfortable with where we've settled and don't want to push those boundaries any further."

I think that's where we are now, experimenting until we find that comfortable point for both of us

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am continually finding new boundries. I am very fortunate to know a very sassy lady who knows me better than I know myself. Looking forward to the next challenge

Do you enjoy pushing these boundaries? Have you found it sometimes confirms your original limits? "

I do yes. It's a mixture of excitement and nerves and I guess I'll soon find a boundary I won't wish to cross but I have a very, very good line of communication with my fwb and we talk in depth about anything and everything. So that itself is perfect preparation for anything new we wish to try. Yes I know, I'm a very lucky guy

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