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What is the best comeback you have heard to an insult

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By *usman 199 OP   Man
over a year ago

Stockport

.Hope you are enjoying your week end. Only Saturday aswell .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" .Hope you are enjoying your week end. Only Saturday aswell . "

Yo Mumma

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By *asilyled1Man
over a year ago

ogmore valley

You want my comeback?

Check your mothers mouth

(Not directed at you OP!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hope you get everything you deserve ( take it which ever way you want )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gay

I'm as straight as the pole your mother dances on

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

Not quite an insult, but this is my favourite entry from the "badass boast / real life" section on the website "tv tropes".

When Philip II of Macedon sent a message to Sparta saying "If I enter Laconia, I will level Sparta to the ground," The Spartans' response was one word: "If." Later, Philip II sent another message to Sparta, asking if they would rather have him come as friend or foe; the Spartan reply was, "Neither."

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I am rubber, you are glue

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Someone commented on my tall, slim frame in a derogatory way. My comeback statement was "You are only jealous".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mother's a What?

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By *erfectman122Man
over a year ago

from somewhere nice

Your totally right

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yer da sells Avon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go visit your wife , your brother does

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You want my comeback?

Check your mothers mouth

(Not directed at you OP!) "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Someone commented on my tall, slim frame in a derogatory way. My comeback statement was "You are only jealous"."

.

Someone referred to my short, small frame as an insult when I asked him, politely, to desist from being a lout and my answer was "at least my intellect towers over yours if that's the best insult you can throw."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got told to think before I open my gob !

Told him think before he makes judgments !

Boss is total dick clueless!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes I say two three four. Sometimes say four five six.

Use the first letters of the numbers to make a comeback. 4 5 6 is easy.

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By *utdooorsyguyMan
over a year ago

town

"My dear, you are ugly, and what’s more, you are disgustingly ugly. But tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be disgustingly ugly"

Got to love a bit of Churchill for insults!!!

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

Al bundy was the king of insults

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When someone is sitting alone and some prick says "are you sitting with your chums", the best comeback ever - "no, I'm sitting with yours ye prick".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Al bundy was the king of insults "

Unlike his cousin Ted, who would just kill anyone that insulted him

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

At a comedy club with 3 mates. The comedian picks on my friend about how she is dressed. My friend 'it's not as bad as what you're wearing'. Comedian 'what do you mean?', my mate comes back quick as a flash 'my grandads got a jumper like that!' The whole room was pissing themselves. Fantastic night out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some of these are hilarious

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington


"Al bundy was the king of insults

Unlike his cousin Ted, who would just kill anyone that insulted him "

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

Light travels faster than sound which is why you seemed bright until you spoke

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

I am returning your nose. I found it in my business.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

Your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

Remember when I asked for your opinion? Me neither.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth.

Remember when I asked for your opinion? Me neither."

.

Good God man, you're unstoppable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yer da sells Avon."

Ooo please god no

Not that cringe worthy song

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'I heard your father said something pretty awful when you were born'.

'That's horrible. Take that back'.

'Yes that was it'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, your husband is a nice guy. It's a pity personality isn't an STD.

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By *J and CBCouple
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

Fancy having lovely blonde hair and dying your roots grey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Courtesy of Jimmy Carr.

Your Mum told me you'd say that. At least I think it was your Mum, we weren't the only ones there and she had her mouth full.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I envy so many people. Everyone's who has never met you, for example.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go find yourself! not that derogatory comments float this way.

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By *ad66Couple
over a year ago

Manchester

From the film On golden pond, young kid says to the very old Henry Fonda "wow, you're really really old!" to which Fonda replies, "you think I'm old, you should meet my grandpa" the kid says "what, your grandpa's still alive?" Fonda says "nope, but you should meet him"

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By *etMeBeYourFantasyyMan
over a year ago

bournemouth

The classic - do one cxnt does the trick

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By *lwaysHorny1997Man
over a year ago

tonbridge

Im gonna fuck your mum and give her a child she actually loves - almost cried laughing

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