FabSwingers.com forum: Unread messages

By *ames5169 OP Man
over a year ago

Birmingham

What do you think of women boasting about their unread messages? Wouldn’t it be better for them to apply filters to reduce the number ? Or block men altogether so they don’t receive any ? Speaking as someone who has 1 unread message so obviously not jealous!! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just have a chuckle to myself. And move on.

I’m largely ambivalent to those kinds of boasts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/02/22 16:15:56]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven't seen any boasting posts. I did complain about my unreads a couple of weeks ago and had apologised on my status for not replying to people. That issue fixed itself when I accidentally 'deleted all' in the sleepy early hours one morning. Whoops.

Only then, I got some snotty messages because I'd deleted without replying. I guess you can't please everyone, right?

At risk of sounding like I am boasting (I'm genuinely not, hand on heart), I don't know how to reduce the number of messages received without stopping them entirely. I don't want to block all men. I just want them to read my profile and filter themselves out.

The surprise for me was the speed of getting to that number of messages, most from people that weren't even looking for someone like me or what I offer. You can't fix that, can you? If so, please do tell me. It would be a big help.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

If people would just read profiles and respect what others have on their profiles as to what they are looking for then the messages shouldn't be in that great a number.

Why should woman have to turn filters on?????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t think I’ve seen anyone boasting

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"What do you think of women boasting about their unread messages? Wouldn’t it be better for them to apply filters to reduce the number ? Or block men altogether so they don’t receive any ? Speaking as someone who has 1 unread message so obviously not jealous!! Lol"

Can I ask why you haven’t opened the one you’ve got. No criticism or agenda, just being nosey.

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By *hewifeandiCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

"If people would just read profiles and respect what others have on their profiles as to what they are looking for then the messages shouldn't be in that great a number.

Why should woman have to turn filters on?????"

Have to agree with this .Reading a profile is to hard for some mind

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I think it's not worth worrying about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it really boasting (not that I've seen anyone doing it) or is it a cry for help?

Also you can't prescribe how other people manage their messages...

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

That's what I do. I'm still currently sitting on 4. I'm lazy

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"If people would just read profiles and respect what others have on their profiles as to what they are looking for then the messages shouldn't be in that great a number.

Why should woman have to turn filters on?????

Have to agree with this .Reading a profile is to hard for some mind "

Very true x

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"I think it's not worth worrying about"

Just this.

Nod, smile or roll your eyes and get on with your day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't stand a messy box! I have no unread messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I ask why you haven’t opened the one you’ve got. No criticism or agenda, just being nosey.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

Who's doing a LAM....People are answering the OP!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

What's LAM?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I don’t post it as a lam, I post because I feel really bad about bulk deleting, but sometimes I just have to.

I tend to have filters on, but if I take them off for a forum game or something then my box gets full, and not in the way I like it filled

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

What's LAM?"

Look at me....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I don’t post it as a lam, I post because I feel really bad about bulk deleting, but sometimes I just have to.

I tend to have filters on, but if I take them off for a forum game or something then my box gets full, and not in the way I like it filled

Ooh er missus

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

What's LAM?

Look at me...."

Ah. Thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

What's LAM?"

Look at me I’d guess

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

No offence taken on my part

I didn't post anything here about it but I updated my status to try and stop follow up messages. "Why haven't you answered my first three?" It worked to a point. They certainly slowed down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The worst feature on here is the messages showing as unread , or deleted .

It seems it is what gets people's backs up for some reason.

Mayby the fact they can't handle rejection and then seeing that a message has been unread or deleted sends they pysyco lol.

But if that feature wasn't on I think noone would know .

And a lot can't grasp that the men to women ratio is insane , so most women get hundreds of messages a second

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What makes you think we don't have filters on anyway? Many women/couples do. I do.

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

Who's doing a LAM....People are answering the OP! "

I was answering and agreeing with the OP. I didn't say people in the thread were doing a LAM, just that that's how I perceive it. As an unnecessary thing to post.

I gave a nod to folk who had commented, with their reason, so as show that I wasn't including them.

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

No offence taken on my part

I didn't post anything here about it but I updated my status to try and stop follow up messages. "Why haven't you answered my first three?" It worked to a point. They certainly slowed down. "

Thanks lovely, and none was meant to you x

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I don’t post it as a lam, I post because I feel really bad about bulk deleting, but sometimes I just have to.

I tend to have filters on, but if I take them off for a forum game or something then my box gets full, and not in the way I like it filled

Ah, but Hippy, you're your own worst enemy. You drop your filters for the games & they're in like Flyn for your boobies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I don’t post it as a lam, I post because I feel really bad about bulk deleting, but sometimes I just have to.

I tend to have filters on, but if I take them off for a forum game or something then my box gets full, and not in the way I like it filled

Ah, but Hippy, you're your own worst enemy. You drop your filters for the games & they're in like Flyn for your boobies

They bloody are, apparently I should drop my knickers as well

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I'm going to agree with this mainly because I'm chuckling at Red's balls to be so direct about how she sees it.

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I'm going to agree with this mainly because I'm chuckling at Red's balls to be so direct about how she sees it.

Cheers Meli!

Sometimes I just have to say it as I see it.

If you don't want hundreds of messages, filter up!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think it's about boasting. Some must get loads of messages. They are under no obligation to trawl through them all..

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

I don't have the problem that the women and couples on here have with regards to the number of messages I get.

When I get loads of messages at work,e-mail, I look at them then delete them, then if it has a read receipt it shows as having been read. This has something to do with a bit of OCD though as I hate seeing the number of unread messages showing up in blood blue. I do accept that this may not be a good use of your time especially if you get 100's of messages per day.

If only people took the time to read and understand the words, on a profile, properly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I'm going to agree with this mainly because I'm chuckling at Red's balls to be so direct about how she sees it.

Cheers Meli!

Sometimes I just have to say it as I see it.

If you don't want hundreds of messages, filter up!

Users shouldn't need to "filter up"

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By *asty tatsyMan
over a year ago

london

I don’t see it as boasting or popularity to be honest, I think women are just saying it’s hard to message everyone back as they receive too many which is a fact. When they say sorry they had to mass delete I think it’s just out of curtesy

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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago

Stirling

Never think about it to be honest, there answering a forum with the number - not much more of a thought process for me than a question and answer

More things to concern myself with on here than the number of messages someone does or doesn’t get x

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By *andering Welsh GuyMan
over a year ago

All over the place

To an extent yes, but guess it depends on how many, like 200 a day etc is a little crazy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I'm going to agree with this mainly because I'm chuckling at Red's balls to be so direct about how she sees it.

Cheers Meli!

Sometimes I just have to say it as I see it.

If you don't want hundreds of messages, filter up!

You'd think that would be the logical thing to do wouldn't you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have relatively tight filters still have an unruly inbox though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't have any unread messages. It bothers me having it showing. Cant cope with the red dots on my apps either.

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

I'm going to agree with this mainly because I'm chuckling at Red's balls to be so direct about how she sees it.

Cheers Meli!

Sometimes I just have to say it as I see it.

If you don't want hundreds of messages, filter up!

You'd think that would be the logical thing to do wouldn't you

You would indeed lovely.

If you're gonna complain about 100's of messages - and let's be clear, that's what I'm refereeing to - employ filters.

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By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville

"If people would just read profiles and respect what others have on their profiles as to what they are looking for then the messages shouldn't be in that great a number.

Why should woman have to turn filters on?????"

Agreed you wise lady sparkle, I even have it written in my 1st paragraph and still receive loads of messages every day from unverified ppl

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"If people would just read profiles and respect what others have on their profiles as to what they are looking for then the messages shouldn't be in that great a number.

Why should woman have to turn filters on?????

Agreed you wise lady sparkle, I even have it written in my 1st paragraph and still receive loads of messages every day from unverified ppl

Maybe the way to go is just have blank profiles

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

"I don't have any unread messages. It bothers me having it showing. Cant cope with the red dots on my apps either.

Or blue for e-mails. I get all twitchy when I see colleagues with 100's or in some cases 1000's.

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything."

I'm not talking about the content of the messages because the whole point is that they are all unread.

It's all about the numbers and very naive to say it's not when it's used every single day on here by some women to basically say mines bigger than yours.

I've seen it dozens of times in the forums and just as often in private messages. Why else would anyone start a thread telling everyone how many unread messages they have if it wasn't a LAM or a humble boast?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, I've seen people saying how many unread messages they have but it's not in a boast way imo. It's to show guys that it's not only that one individual waiting for a reply!

You'll be glad to hear I have none unread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything.

I'm not talking about the content of the messages because the whole point is that they are all unread.

It's all about the numbers and very naive to say it's not when it's used every single day on here by some women to basically say mines bigger than yours.

I’m only speaking for myself, I don’t feel that amount of messages = popularly.

Some men will literally message any women in reach. I don’t consider it a marker of popularity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/02/22 17:22:02]

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything.

I'm not talking about the content of the messages because the whole point is that they are all unread.

It's all about the numbers and very naive to say it's not when it's used every single day on here by some women to basically say mines bigger than yours.

And just to add, I don't see any amount of messages,fabs,friend requests or how many times you post on the forums as a sign of popularity but it's very obvious that some are confising productivity with popularity and they use all those tools as part of their USP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why turn filters on when they might just be able tell from the picture or beginning of the message that they aren’t interested, maybe they aren’t looking to chat to somebody new or your message just joins the list of the other 100s they have. Don’t worry about others so much …. Just relax and enjoy the site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything.

I'm not talking about the content of the messages because the whole point is that they are all unread.

It's all about the numbers and very naive to say it's not when it's used every single day on here by some women to basically say mines bigger than yours.

I agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The worst feature on here is the messages showing as unread , or deleted .

It seems it is what gets people's backs up for some reason.

Mayby the fact they can't handle rejection and then seeing that a message has been unread or deleted sends they pysyco lol.

But if that feature wasn't on I think noone would know .

And a lot can't grasp that the men to women ratio is insane , so most women get hundreds of messages a second

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t like a messy inbox either, like another fabber suggested. The filters are great - fab please add location filters and verified by meeting filters! Thanks!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No offence to the ladies posting above but I do read it as a LAM status. Or at the very least that the lady doth protest too much

No offence taken on my part

I didn't post anything here about it but I updated my status to try and stop follow up messages. "Why haven't you answered my first three?" It worked to a point. They certainly slowed down.

Thanks lovely, and none was meant to you x"

All good

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Why turn filters on when they might just be able tell from the picture or beginning of the message that they aren’t interested, maybe they aren’t looking to chat to somebody new or your message just joins the list of the other 100s they have. Don’t worry about others so much …. Just relax and enjoy the site

Exactly, we shouldn't need to turn on filters just because others are too lazy to read.

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull

Along with the pointless (imo) how many views have you had? So many view in stealth no one would even know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

2,983,848 unread messages

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden

"Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it."

•

Whoa there young lady! I have seen many delectably enticing and salaciously inviting Apple Pies that would benefit from my love making.

Especially the ones sprinkled with copious amounts of sweet cinnamon.

Don't knock it.

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE

I don't believe women should have to employ filters. But, if you complain about too many messages, you are better off using them...for some calm at least.

I talked a friend into turning on filters when I saw she had 1600 unread messages.

It would put me off just seeing that much workload every time I logged on.

She says she feels less stressed as a result and that is a good thing.

I am sure there are other things Fab could do to ease this avalanche of unsolicited messages and dick pics...but they haven't.

So, use filters for a quiet life. Drop them

...for moments of madness.

As for those who "boast"...well they are either truly stressed and ap9logetic, or misguided as to their importance.

Either way, I will just tend to my 2 messages. A week.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The worst feature on here is the messages showing as unread , or deleted .

It seems it is what gets people's backs up for some reason.

Mayby the fact they can't handle rejection and then seeing that a message has been unread or deleted sends they pysyco lol.

But if that feature wasn't on I think noone would know .

And a lot can't grasp that the men to women ratio is insane , so most women get hundreds of messages a second

65% men apparently, I read a review of this site.

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By *o new WinksMan
over a year ago

BSE

"2,983,848 unread messages

Prove it

I thought it stopped before 2000

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

•

Whoa there young lady! I have seen many delectably enticing and salaciously inviting Apple Pies that would benefit from my love making.

Especially the ones sprinkled with copious amounts of sweet cinnamon.

Don't knock it.

*goes and sprinkles cinnamon on myself. After a few shakes, I take the lid off and throw it over my head in utter bliss*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm happy with my 10ish messages a day.

Even then most go unread...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything.

I'm not talking about the content of the messages because the whole point is that they are all unread.

It's all about the numbers and very naive to say it's not when it's used every single day on here by some women to basically say mines bigger than yours.

whats a LAM?

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Never came across anyone boasting,having ex amount of messages.besides pointing out that they have a considerable amount and would struggle to get through this and took the option to delete.or would reply to as many as they are able to.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

It’s nothing to boast about its a pain in the arse

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything.

I'm not talking about the content of the messages because the whole point is that they are all unread.

It's all about the numbers and very naive to say it's not when it's used every single day on here by some women to basically say mines bigger than yours.

whats a LAM?"

Look at me.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I've referred to this in the past as the female equivalent of a sky remote.

There have been a number of humble boast threads over the last year or so from women claiming to have 500+ unread messages and others post saying that's nothing they have 800 or 1000.

It doesn't bother me how many they have tbh but it is used by some as a measuring tool to determine popularity.

I've seen screenshots that some have sent in private messages to prove that they really do have all those unread messages.

I never get this, how is it a measure of popularity.

Some men would message an Apple pie if they thought they could fuck it.

Nothing on here is an indication of popularity, not messages, fabs or anything.

I'm not talking about the content of the messages because the whole point is that they are all unread.

It's all about the numbers and very naive to say it's not when it's used every single day on here by some women to basically say mines bigger than yours.

whats a LAM?"

I saw this the other day on a post and wondered what it was too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyhoo. That’s all exciting reading.

I’m off to answer my 23 messages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not always down to the woman's filters. I use all the relevant filters available to me.

I can't filter any further without just blocking all men!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women get flooded by guys on here because it’s free. I remember the old aff days where you paid and it was much easier to chat to someone you wanted too and actually take time to see if they want the same as you not just spamming

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