FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Chat with women

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

have a question, especially for women:

I have seen many profiles that say they are waiting for some effort in the messages they receive. My question is: what do you expect me to tell you, since I don't know you? Do you want me to write you a short story? I just have nothing to write to someone I've never talked to in my life, other than "Hi! What are you doing? I'd love to talk and get to know you." After receiving an answer, the discussion can continue. That's how I see it. I'm really looking forward to seeing women's views on this.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m not a woman.

I like to receive messages about sandwiches.

Meat, accessories, garnish and bread details.

Hope this helps.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Here's a novel idea.

Read their profile and that will give you plenty of clues of things to write about.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I'm not looking to meet men.

If I was, I would want a message that shows they had actually read my profile and met all my criteria. It would also be in sentances, with punctuation and no text speak.

Adding a face photo would probably help too.

Though to be honest, if I was looking to meet men, I would block them and do the looking myself.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

As above, read the profile, respond accordingly, include a face pic.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reading the profile bio is a great start. Yes some are like war and peace, others short and sweet, if you dont match what the lady is looking for, its a waste of a message. Your own profile being well presented is another good idea.

I’ve answered ‘hi! How’re you?’ Messages if i’ve liked the profile of the message sender.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

OP... it might not be your messages that are the problem, but your profile... or lack thereof...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reading the profile will answer this question, pick out something you have in common and run with it, maybes tell them what made you message them ie you have beautiful eyes and I have to message because …… make it honest, we smell bull shut a mile away xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ndyn50000Man
over a year ago

Birmingham


"I’m not a woman.

I like to receive messages about sandwiches.

Meat, accessories, garnish and bread details.

Hope this helps."

Do you also like references to special sauce in the opening messages?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m not a woman.

I like to receive messages about sandwiches.

Meat, accessories, garnish and bread details.

Hope this helps.

Do you also like references to special sauce in the opening messages?"

Obvs.

Who doesn’t?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Here's a novel idea.

Read their profile and that will give you plenty of clues of things to write about.

"

Look, I read your profile and even though you say you don't want to be wanted, the pictures you post make you wanted by men. I, as a man, will naturally want you after seeing the pictures and videos with you on your profile, so what should I tell you after reading your profile? )

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ndyn50000Man
over a year ago

Birmingham


"I’m not a woman.

I like to receive messages about sandwiches.

Meat, accessories, garnish and bread details.

Hope this helps.

Do you also like references to special sauce in the opening messages?

Obvs.

Who doesn’t? "

I am a true amateur at sandwich opening mails I'm afraid. I usually stick to curry and ask about naan preferences

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well OP, are you what they are looking for? The “cannot accommodate” may be a red flag for starters.

And mentioning you miss sex on your profile status isn’t exactly going to sell you.

There are far more men than women here, something to remember.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's a novel idea.

Read their profile and that will give you plenty of clues of things to write about.

Look, I read your profile and even though you say you don't want to be wanted, the pictures you post make you wanted by men. I, as a man, will naturally want you after seeing the pictures and videos with you on your profile, so what should I tell you after reading your profile? )"

Not this… definitely not this!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" "Hi! What are you doing? I'd love to talk and get to know you." "

Ok roleplay

'Hey, not much. You? Yeh, ok.'

In my experience, boring questions get boring answers and the conversation leads nowhere.

I like being read Goodnight moon

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try pick something from their profile but it really is just luck on here whether it gets read..

Some women want their egos massaged so regardless what you write it'll not be good enough for them..

Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ndyn50000Man
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Here's a novel idea.

Read their profile and that will give you plenty of clues of things to write about.

Look, I read your profile and even though you say you don't want to be wanted, the pictures you post make you wanted by men. I, as a man, will naturally want you after seeing the pictures and videos with you on your profile, so what should I tell you after reading your profile? )

Not this… definitely not this! "

Spot on. Write something amusing, ridiculous and stand out (this comes with a high risk of being regarded as an idiot - fortunately I am one and this helps)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lots of women have "cannot accomodate", why is this a red flag? Single parents with kids may not want to mix casual sex encounters and home life, yes?

Lots of women have profiles that don't tell much about what they like or who they are. "Looking for fun with men"; what do you say then "Hi, I am a, err... man?" Is that message "tailored" enough?

There is an amount of BS here that is staggering; like so many profile without picture at all asking specifically to attach a face pic with first message. Little bit of intellectual honesty doesn’t hurt!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South

Hey sugar tits,

I can’t help but notice that you’re currently in the market to test drive a cock.

Here’s mine (insert cock pic of choice). How do you fancy being it’s one careful owner this week?

RSVP ASAP!

Cheers

Dave

—————-

Something like this. Because it would make me giggle.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Makes no difference what you send, if they don't want to reply for whatever reason, they won't. A basic expectation is that you indicate you've read the profile and have a reason for messaging. A copy and paste message is obvious too so most people will delete these straight away.

Ultimately be you, have a sense of humour and don't take it all too seriously. I don't expect anyone to chase me or pretend to be something they are not, just a genuine message.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tan thrill seekerMan
over a year ago

wigan

Write a message and don’t expect a reply, if you do it’s a bonus. Some profiles may not give much away, the odd profile may have a tick list where you think you tick every box. You can right the most considered and personal message and it might not even get read. However try and persevere and get creative.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth


"Here's a novel idea.

Read their profile and that will give you plenty of clues of things to write about.

Look, I read your profile and even though you say you don't want to be wanted, the pictures you post make you wanted by men. I, as a man, will naturally want you after seeing the pictures and videos with you on your profile, so what should I tell you after reading your profile? )"

Absolutely nothing.

You've completely missed the point.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Making an effort will mean different things to different people.

However what does ring throughout these type of threads is, a constant stream of messages that completely ignore anything said or request in their profile. This isn’t what anyone wants. The endless “fancy a fuck”, “I’m free for fun tonight” or something similar is tedious and can make us dread our inboxes.

The attitude of entitlement of a reply and abusive messages also not what anyone wants, either side.

Ultimately it doesn’t really matter if you do put in the effort, if that person isn’t interested they won’t change their mind. But if you send a half arsed messages because you haven’t read their bio it may very well put off.

No one wants people to be something they’re are not, but they would also like to have their preference respected.

Also if you don’t get a reply, it isn’t always because they think you did something wrong.

Personally my message are turned off for all. I deleted most of bio, as it’s very rare for people to actually read it or take it in and it became frustrating and actually I just didn’t want to read the messages anymore.

I get it can be disheartening to not receive a reply but it’s also the same when 80-90% of the messages have everything you’ve clearly stated you don’t want.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Here's a novel idea.

Read their profile and that will give you plenty of clues of things to write about.

Look, I read your profile and even though you say you don't want to be wanted, the pictures you post make you wanted by men. I, as a man, will naturally want you after seeing the pictures and videos with you on your profile, so what should I tell you after reading your profile? )"

The clue is in the profile, don't contact and move along to another.

Reading profiles can offer you lots to speak about in your opening message.

That's the secret, but don't tell everyone.

Read the profile, see if you think you may be compatible, then message expressing what caught your eye and how you think you may be compatible.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"OP... it might not be your messages that are the problem, but your profile... or lack thereof..."

Precisely.

Many here, before opening a message will check out the profile attached.

If the profile doesn't catch their eye, many have already made to their minds before opening up the message.

Effort is appealing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top