FabSwingers.com forum: Simple question

By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Yes i have been watching loose women.

But what does it mean when people say we "work" at out marriage, or that youve got to "work" at it to keep it alive. What does Work at it" actually mean in this context

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

flexibility

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do as she says

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do as she says

Great answer!

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By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem."

Now that is what it means to me, but surely that comes naturally, its the word work i struggle with as though its some chore you have to do

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By *ooty and suuCouple
over a year ago

barnsley

swing more often lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do as she says

Great answer!

Thanks she told me to put it .. Lol

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

To me it means making the time for each other....we always set aside some time just for us. Otherwise you can get bogged down into a work/family rountine.

Making sure you listen and talk to one another.

Just not take each other for granted really...

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By *hynottsCouple
over a year ago

nottingham

Give her the pay packet and. Let her think she is the boss lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem."

hey shall we say we can all go on as guests to talk about how we keep ours alive?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem.

Now that is what it means to me, but surely that comes naturally, its the word work i struggle with as though its some chore you have to do"

Well yes but if you think of it like it is a physical or mental effort directed towards doing or making something, then that could be applied to the meaning of working on a marriage.

However I think marriages that require a lot of "work" will be the ones under strain/divorce.

A true bond, and happy marriage will be imo, one where little "work" is required as you flow together throughout life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem.

hey shall we say we can all go on as guests to talk about how we keep ours alive?

On where lol, please god don't say Jeremy!! Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Coming form a single girl but I see it as compromise making time for each other having your special date night and being there for one another and being best friends as well as lovers x and a whole lot of other stuff x

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By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem.

Now that is what it means to me, but surely that comes naturally, its the word work i struggle with as though its some chore you have to do

Well yes but if you think of it like it is a physical or mental effort directed towards doing or making something, then that could be applied to the meaning of working on a marriage.

However I think marriages that require a lot of "work" will be the ones under strain/divorce.

A true bond, and happy marriage will be imo, one where little "work" is required as you flow together throughout life."

Well that saved me typing all that out, i agree completely

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By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

[Removed by poster at 09/10/12 14:11:53]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Give her the pay packet and. Let her think she is the boss lol

Done and she is the boss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem.

Now that is what it means to me, but surely that comes naturally, its the word work i struggle with as though its some chore you have to do

Well yes but if you think of it like it is a physical or mental effort directed towards doing or making something, then that could be applied to the meaning of working on a marriage.

However I think marriages that require a lot of "work" will be the ones under strain/divorce.

A true bond, and happy marriage will be imo, one where little "work" is required as you flow together throughout life.

Well that saved me typing all that out, i agree completely"

Great, let's get married

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By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem.

Now that is what it means to me, but surely that comes naturally, its the word work i struggle with as though its some chore you have to do

Well yes but if you think of it like it is a physical or mental effort directed towards doing or making something, then that could be applied to the meaning of working on a marriage.

However I think marriages that require a lot of "work" will be the ones under strain/divorce.

A true bond, and happy marriage will be imo, one where little "work" is required as you flow together throughout life.

Well that saved me typing all that out, i agree completely

Great, let's get married

ha ha, thankyou for your generous proposal but on this occasion im going to have to take a rain check as i dont want to get married again lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I take it to mean, keeping your relationship fresh and alive.

Don't get into a routine that could become boring.

Put the effort into keeping communication, dreams and expectations of one another going, as you get older and time moves on, things/people change and it is about changing in tandem.

Now that is what it means to me, but surely that comes naturally, its the word work i struggle with as though its some chore you have to do

Well yes but if you think of it like it is a physical or mental effort directed towards doing or making something, then that could be applied to the meaning of working on a marriage.

However I think marriages that require a lot of "work" will be the ones under strain/divorce.

A true bond, and happy marriage will be imo, one where little "work" is required as you flow together throughout life.

Well that saved me typing all that out, i agree completely

Great, let's get married

ha ha, thankyou for your generous proposal but on this occasion im going to have to take a rain check as i dont want to get married again lol"

Sssh I'd have to get divorced as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes i have been watching loose women.

But what does it mean when people say we "work" at out marriage, or that youve got to "work" at it to keep it alive. What does Work at it" actually mean in this context"

I hate work, and try and do as little of it as possible

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By *lackboaWoman
over a year ago

greenock

i'm with Julie....if you have to work at it, that means its an effort....and a good relationship should be 'effortless'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The simplest questions often demand the most complex answers !

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

One of my aunts has the most contented marriage I have ever seen. They are like chalk and cheese but the love shines out of their eyes and they are united on all major decisions. Their children, now all adults, know where they stand.

She always says that it is because they put the work in. They know what is going on with each other because they spend time talking about things, agreeing a way forward and supporting each other. They have always worked hard to have a home and family. They worked shifts most of their working lives - if he was on days then she was on nights to ensure there was always childcare. If they hadn't put the time and effort into the marriage they could easily have found strangers at home when they stopped the shifts.

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By *acandJulesCouple
over a year ago

Stockton on Tees

"Do as she says

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Communication.

Understanding.

Empathy.

Co-operating.

Commitment.

Negotiating win win situations.

And learning to love the small of their farts.

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