FabSwingers.com forum: Tell me what you do for a living in a fun way

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Without actually saying what you do?

For example, I provide quality of life for people

Let others guess what you Actually do!

Just for fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use my magic hands on old things?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I point out the faults in other people's work

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

I use science to predict the ravages of the future and engineering to reduce the impact of that future _ased upon the findings of a triple bottom line risk assessment.

I am told, daily, that I lack both compassion and empathy, because when I get it right nobody knows, and when I get it wrong, everyone does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I let every little helps help the helpers

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

"I use science to predict the ravages of the future and engineering to reduce the impact of that future _ased upon the findings of a triple bottom line risk assessment.

I am told, daily, that I lack both compassion and empathy, because when I get it right nobody knows, and when I get it wrong, everyone does. "

Ah you said “fun” way….. erm……. Nope, got nothing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Protecting members of public

I might be watching you

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

I sit in my office drinking tea, dunking biscuits & errrr

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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

I load people who are willing to go into a metal tube and be locked in there, at very close proximity, for anytime between 40min and 14 hours. And they thank me for it.

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

I book things then cancel them again

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By *rTongueMan
over a year ago

...

I turn up, wiggle a mouse, and hope nobody realises I dint have a clue what I do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I book things then cancel them again

You don't work for mp's party planning then??

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

I used to be there, 24-7 364 days etc..

But not alone..

Now I eat Werther's toffees and walk the dogs..

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By *ustamanMan
over a year ago

weymouth

I set fire to explosive gasses, hopefully in a controlled manner

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

"I turn up, wiggle a mouse, and hope nobody realises I dint have a clue what I do"

Cat catcher?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I pump lubricant into small holes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I resolve complicated situations for extravagant amounts of money.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i make electrons flow along wires to make things move, cook, pack and illimunate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I pump lubricant into small holes"

Your gavin off auto glass you need to stop pumping your special resin in to everyone's crack

Keep doing it

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By *obycontinuedMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I make people feel better by messing with there hair

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By *exy Ruby 100 300Couple
over a year ago

unknown

I help those ,who can't do things like d use to R x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't even know myself to be honest. Type lots of numbers.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

I abuse a rodent so I can draw lines and circles.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tell people what to do for a living and I also persuade people to give me money

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I disappear for 3 weeks at a time and sometimes come home with a sun tan - do I even work?? I could tell you but our good friends at MI5 are probably trolling FAB right now, so I'd best keep shtumm.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

i can't - no one ever thinks my job is fun but they all want me when there is a problem!!

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I care for people who forget who i am.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I pump lubricant into small holes

Your gavin off auto glass you need to stop pumping your special resin in to everyone's crack

Keep doing it "

Unfortunately not! Filling glass would be a step up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I teach people to suck eggs

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By *pen2UMan
over a year ago

Telford

I play with a scanner whilst sat down and enjoying chatting with 100s of people a day!

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By *ig_eric_tionMan
over a year ago

IPSWICH

I get wood often.

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By *ysyphusMan
over a year ago

Star_ase K-7

I conduct long term testing on mattresses.

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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago

Newry Down

I spent hours every day ferreting out information which few people really want, and in the meantime I come across other information that I often put into threads on the forum for which I am vilified, lambasted, lampooned, ridiculed, criticised, berated and abused: to loosely paraphrase Oscar Wilde: it would be worse if they were ignoring him.

I enjoy what I do; in both contexts!

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By *entleman_spyMan
over a year ago

nearby

"I disappear for 3 weeks at a time and sometimes come home with a sun tan - do I even work?? I could tell you but our good friends at MI5 are probably trolling FAB right now, so I'd best keep shtumm."

No we’re not

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By *aughty but nice...Man
over a year ago

Staffs

I move bits and pieces around the world

We can get it anywhere as long as it's not Europe ..lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I annoy people on daily basis

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I sit in a metal box most days looking down at the clouds

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try and find practical solutions for people in distress, hopefully empowering them to help themselves in the future, all whilst society hates me and thinks I steal and torture children.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m a taxi for people with medical issues

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Post udders and pasteurised controller

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I fold pretty squares of paper in creative manner to make lovely people smile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I sit in a metal box most days looking down at the clouds "

Pilot?

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

Ain't nothing fun in stacking shelves!

It was funner when I fielded babies for a living but I much prefer the absence of stress stacking shelves and making things go 'beep beep'.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ain't nothing fun in stacking shelves!

It was funner when I fielded babies for a living but I much prefer the absence of stress stacking shelves and making things go 'beep beep'."

You could make it more fun by facing up so tight the customers cant get it out!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I work for nothing but the enjoyment of helping others

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"Ain't nothing fun in stacking shelves!

It was funner when I fielded babies for a living but I much prefer the absence of stress stacking shelves and making things go 'beep beep'.

You could make it more fun by facing up so tight the customers cant get it out!

Ha! There always a few extras at the back out of place that I could jam in.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I am loving reading these btw!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I make men happy, and the occasional woman..

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

I’m not entirely sure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I teach people how to get more internet likes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I provide people with multiple bills which have payment deadlines and they thank me for it.

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"I provide people with multiple bills which have payment deadlines and they thank me for it."

That’s like the prime minister thanking the honourable gentleman for asking a question that’s actually telling him he’s a lying buffoon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I make your cuppa tea so much better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I provide people with oral pleasure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I provide people with multiple bills which have payment deadlines and they thank me for it.

That’s like the prime minister thanking the honourable gentleman for asking a question that’s actually telling him he’s a lying buffoon.

My bills never lie

questioned sometimes with peoples own workings

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman
over a year ago

Next Door

create and support things for hospitals

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I sit in a metal box most days looking down at the clouds

Pilot?"

Correct

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I provide people with oral pleasure

Barista?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I observe where the wave function of the Schrodinger Equation will collapse and on these findings and the probability of it occuring again judge where to send life saving medical support.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I provide people with multiple bills which have payment deadlines and they thank me for it.

That’s like the prime minister thanking the honourable gentleman for asking a question that’s actually telling him he’s a lying buffoon.

My bills never lie

questioned sometimes with peoples own workings

Accountant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I provide people with oral pleasure

Ice cream lady.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I provide people with oral pleasure

Ice cream lady."

no, but I could branch out!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One mate said I press buttons. To be more accurate I also cut, screw and blow gas before I press 3 buttons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One mate said I press buttons. To be more accurate I also cut, screw and blow gas before I press 3 buttons. "

I was hoping you were actually a pheasant plucker.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I provide people with oral pleasure

Ice cream lady.

no, but I could branch out! "

Can I have a 99 please?

I mean a 69.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I provide people with multiple bills which have payment deadlines and they thank me for it.

That’s like the prime minister thanking the honourable gentleman for asking a question that’s actually telling him he’s a lying buffoon.

My bills never lie

questioned sometimes with peoples own workings

Accountant"

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I provide people with multiple bills which have payment deadlines and they thank me for it.

That’s like the prime minister thanking the honourable gentleman for asking a question that’s actually telling him he’s a lying buffoon.

My bills never lie

questioned sometimes with peoples own workings

Accountant

Will you have a look at my abacus?

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

I often inflict pain on request and people actually thank me for it

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By *aseMan
over a year ago

Gourock

I offer a service for money

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I often inflict pain on request and people actually thank me for it

I think I did that to you once! And you did indeed thank me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I make your cuppa tea so much better"

Haha very good, I read that and was trying to work it out before I realised you had posted it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell people to stay at home.

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman
over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales

I make sure the rich and famous get from A to B in luxury.

but soon I’ll be a walking, talking road map for 90 lorry drivers

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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago

Stirling

I have 2 jobs for one I jump around in a leotard the other I deal with very rich farmers x

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I have 2 jobs for one I jump around in a leotard the other I deal with very rich farmers x"

Sod the farmers - can I watch you do the first one?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I make sure the rich and famous get from A to B in luxury.

but soon I’ll be a walking, talking road map for 90 lorry drivers

Logistics !

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By *heDesiCandiTV/TS
over a year ago

Leicester

The 3 L’s

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By *eardedman7Man
over a year ago

Berkshire

I sell people

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By *lwayshorny79Woman
over a year ago

Leicester

I arrange for my colleagues to probe people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I catch living things then sell them

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By *uckslut and MCouple
over a year ago

Poole

Fem - I shovel lots of Sh#t, and clean lots willys. No I don't work in a carehome or hospital.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The 3 L’s "

Lick Long Lengths?

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

I work with the C.I.A

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By *ocktoplaywithMan
over a year ago

Derby

I turn over large areas of soil, plant seeds in it, watch them grow, and harvest the results

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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago

Stirling

"I have 2 jobs for one I jump around in a leotard the other I deal with very rich farmers x

Sod the farmers - can I watch you do the first one?

I may have a video

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have 2 jobs for one I jump around in a leotard the other I deal with very rich farmers x

Sod the farmers - can I watch you do the first one?

I may have a video

Of the farms

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I have 2 jobs for one I jump around in a leotard the other I deal with very rich farmers x

Sod the farmers - can I watch you do the first one?

I may have a video

Just for me? Awww thanks

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By *icearmsMan
over a year ago

KIDLINGTON

I schmooze and charm to get what I want.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

I tell people what to do; reel off scientific facts to people younger than me and act as Mum x400

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get paid to keep people hot

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm an internet agony aunt #sponsoredcontent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use the hi-tech technology to create functional and sometimes pretty things.

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By *hunderace...Man
over a year ago

Dudley

I'm currently working 2 jobs atm...

Predominantly I'm in charge of men who will flash you if you watch them, I flash too.

Weekend nights I sometimes fight gypsies

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull

I get lied to, fobbed off, ignored and dismissed. Also get grief because of the way other people do things. It’s a bit like being a single male on here

I do have the ability to withdraw our services though and this does tend to make them change their ways and comply in the end

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All car drivers hate me and need me gha haha

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By *erfectman122Man
over a year ago

from somewhere nice

I get to see air stewardess every day

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By *lice MaliceWoman
over a year ago

The Facility

I provide would be 'people snatchers' with quality alternatives to pillowcases. (All consensually of course).

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

I'm retired now, but I used to make people say "I can remember when this was all fields"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I often inflict pain on request and people actually thank me for it

Chiropractor?

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By *elisandre300Woman
over a year ago

dontbefuckingnosey

I get up really, really early with the hope of tantalizing other peoples tastebuds

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have 2 parts to my job, first part I walk around a lot allegedly throwing things about and the second part I walk around a lot allegedly playing knock a door run and nobody has a good word to say about me

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I get up really, really early with the hope of tantalizing other peoples tastebuds

You cook bacon?

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By *elisandre300Woman
over a year ago

dontbefuckingnosey

"I get up really, really early with the hope of tantalizing other peoples tastebuds

You cook bacon?

Sometimes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tell people how to do a job I have never done

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I get up really, really early with the hope of tantalizing other peoples tastebuds

You cook bacon?

Sometimes

Woohoo. You're my new friend.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have 2 parts to my job, first part I walk around a lot allegedly throwing things about and the second part I walk around a lot allegedly playing knock a door run and nobody has a good word to say about me "

Postman

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/01/22 13:47:07]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get paid to keep people hot "

Heating engineer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look after lots of females.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I look after lots of females."

Nurse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I tell people how to do a job I have never done"

QC inspection?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Postman"

Close but no cigar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get to see air stewardess every day

Pilot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I look after lots of females.

Nurse "

Afraid not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I look after lots of females."

Midwife, prison officer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Postman

Close but no cigar "

Delivery driver - Hermes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I look after lots of females.

Midwife, prison officer"

Good guesses but nope.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I tell people how to do a job I have never done

QC inspection?"

Nowhere near as exciting I'm afraid haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/01/22 13:53:03]

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By *lice MaliceWoman
over a year ago

The Facility

"I look after lots of females."

Shepherdess?

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By *hunderace...Man
over a year ago

Dudley

"I look after lots of females.

Nurse

Afraid not"

I know what ewe do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I care for people who forget who i am."

Carer for people with dementia

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I spin around slowly like a bond villain.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use my hands a lot and people are always pleased to see me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a steering wheel attendant for lots of people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to watch the beautiful countryside whizz past me at 100 mph whilst I got shouted at, cleaned, tidied, made phone calls/announcements, played agony aunt, solved peoples problems, upset people, helped people, played nurse,unblocked toilets, played tetris with huge suitcases and occasionally looked out for red and green lights. Oooohhh I was also in charge of detonators

I don't do it anymore though, too stressful.

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By *xhib12Man
over a year ago

Blyth

I'm retired from my proper job so now I help people who have no idea how to do it themselves.

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By *urfoxsnake69Man
over a year ago

Port Talbot

I turn stuff on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I used to watch the beautiful countryside whizz past me at 100 mph whilst I got shouted at, cleaned, tidied, made phone calls/announcements, played agony aunt, solved peoples problems, upset people, helped people, played nurse,unblocked toilets, played tetris with huge suitcases and occasionally looked out for red and green lights. Oooohhh I was also in charge of detonators

I don't do it anymore though, too stressful. "

Conductor?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I fill things then splash stuff on the filler to fill what I've filled

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stroke pussy’s and delete arseholes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't do it anymore though, too stressful.

Conductor? "

Only the best in the North West

(well in my head I was)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm retired from my proper job so now I help people who have no idea how to do it themselves."

Citizens advice adviser

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By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

If I told you....I would have to make you disappear.....

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I spin around slowly like a bond villain. "

You work for Spectre?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I spin around slowly like a bond villain. "

You test stair lifts for bungalows?

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By *ohnnyGentMan
over a year ago

london

I keep the madhouse from getting out of control…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stroke pussy’s and delete arseholes. "

I do that daily

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stroke pussy’s and delete arseholes.

I do that daily"

You’re just describing an actual Bond villain now.

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By *andonmessMan
over a year ago

A world all of his own

Called out when no-one else can help, proceed to hit things with a hammer until they work again. If that doesn't work, a laptop usually comes out.

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By *olden PoleMan
over a year ago

Kent

My erections can be seen for miles and know mainly in London.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I ruin the commute into London via transport

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By *tarburst babydollMan
over a year ago

Dingwall

I listen to people's problems, get chatted up and flirt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get up really, really early with the hope of tantalizing other peoples tastebuds

You cook bacon?

Sometimes

Baker

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

I tell physicians they’ve done something wrong then I Show them how to do it correctly.

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By *ike both76Man
over a year ago

Kettering

spanner spinner

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By *nn_JamesCouple
over a year ago

the

I buy then sell

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Market Harborough / Kettering

I do lots of scientific calculations, a bit of guessing and add some more numbers and words and then send off this information to someone else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I change this from old to new or just make things new

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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

I get to have wonderful conversations with things with 4 legs

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By *ewbie AnalystMan
over a year ago

Little Sandhurst

I steal all your free time.

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

I help people to understand words and numbers.

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By *ove2Couple
over a year ago

colchester

I look you and dow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't do it anymore though, too stressful. "

Train Stewardess

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By *arker secrets 321Man
over a year ago

West Bromwich

Erect tubes so orther people can do their work then strip it again x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Erect tubes so orther people can do their work then strip it again x"

Scaffolder

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By *aximus74Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

I pull stuff and give good head,also get hot and steamy and soaked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I change this from old to new or just make things new"

Website developer?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I help people to understand words and numbers. "

Teacher

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By *aximus74Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

"I listen to people's problems, get chatted up and flirt"

Bar person

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get to have wonderful conversations with things with 4 legs"

Dog walker? Horse exerciser/trainer?

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

"I help people to understand words and numbers.

Teacher"

Yes.

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By *sturjackMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

You know those little pieces of shiny metal and sometimes small rocks?

Well I make them so you can look even more gorgeous or super handsome...

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

I calculate amounts for people, who are in charge of other people, so that they can send said amounts to the people they are in charge of. Normally once a week or once a month.

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By *arker secrets 321Man
over a year ago

West Bromwich

"Erect tubes so orther people can do their work then strip it again x

Scaffolder "

100percent correct x

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By *aximus74Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

"I calculate amounts for people, who are in charge of other people, so that they can send said amounts to the people they are in charge of. Normally once a week or once a month.

Pays the wage of said people.

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By *irestorm 500Couple
over a year ago

coventry

I put up with rude people who aren't happy you have the things they want and then argue about the prices of other things, who then find it acceptable not to say please or thank you..

X Storm X

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By *ixedDevilMan
over a year ago

Bootyville

I take turns going around to different people…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I watch different things go in and out all day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You know those little pieces of shiny metal and sometimes small rocks?

Well I make them so you can look even more gorgeous or super handsome... "

Jeweller

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

"I put up with rude people who aren't happy you have the things they want and then argue about the prices of other things, who then find it acceptable not to say please or thank you..

X Storm X "

Retail?

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By *sturjackMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"You know those little pieces of shiny metal and sometimes small rocks?

Well I make them so you can look even more gorgeous or super handsome...

Jeweller"

Absolutely correct... Jeweller and silversmith

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By *xhib12Man
over a year ago

Blyth

"I'm retired from my proper job so now I help people who have no idea how to do it themselves.

Citizens advice adviser"

Nope, not even close.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I peel stuff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Watch every one

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By *athyperkinsCouple
over a year ago

lifton

I make arrangements for people to have their heads cut open

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By *orbino67Man
over a year ago

Rochester

I hang off the side of building on a rope looking like a shit spiderman

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Figure out what people mean by "Desktop Cup Holder" and why its not working

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By *rAitchMan
over a year ago

Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe

I make sure 20 people with spanners have things to mend big boys toys.

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By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon

I help people fade away in comfort.

Mart damages peoples houses at their request, bends glass with his bare hands, and enables people to do things quicker than they were doing things before.

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