FabSwingers.com forum: It is what it is

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Up until a few years ago I used to despise this term because I believed it was a very dismissive way of relating to any situation. Basically its avoiding the prospect of a solution to any issue good or bad. That's how I understand it anyway.

Maybe I'm wrong?

Now I use it all the time. Having grown to realise certain situations in life we can never be in control of and we just have to accept them for what they are.

'It is what it is'

How do you see this term? and is there any words or terms you disliked but now find yourself using

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon

And ‘we don’t know what we don’t know’.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

It is what it is is fine. Especially if it is and there’s nowt you can do about it!

“I am what I am and I don’t give a fuck/monkeys/toss what everyone else thinks” I find quite aggressive though and is usually said by those who do give a fuck/monkeys/toss what everyone else thinks.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"And ‘we don’t know what we don’t know’."

But can we find out?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use it for everything I have zero control or influence over. It’s worked for me so far. I’m far happier than when I used to stress over every minute thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use it when I'm feeling a bit stuck but the situation is out of my control. It's like most words and phrases, they all have a place at the right time and in the right context.

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I do use it, because some things just are, and if I have absolutely no control over it then I'm sure as hell not going to stress about it...it's my way of accepting things that I can't change.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Whatever" really racks me off

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

"It is what it is is fine. Especially if it is and there’s nowt you can do about it!

True. Usually very ignorant people who use that phrase!

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I use it a fair bit, especially past events I can no longer change their outcomes.

Sometimes it's an acceptance that you can't change things even if you wish you could.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I'm not sure how long feel about that or "you do you" and " I have to tell my truth"

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By *herry OnatopWoman
over a year ago

Just over there

It seems to have been a phrase used an awful lot over the past 2 years with covid and restrictions.

I've found that it's quite a good statement to make to myself. I am a naturally impatient person and find accepting that 'it is what it is' and repeating it in my head really helps.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

‘Living my best life.’ I’m not sure exactly why but whenever someone utters that phrase, I have an overwhelming urge to end their existence.

Maybe I’m just a miserable sod? Ahhh well, fuck it.

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon

I hate the term ‘smashing it’.

And I’m not keen on ‘most definitely’.

So if during a phone sex session with a woman from Fab - even the one I fancy the most, and she said while masturbating “ I’m most definitely smashing it for you here Seb”, I’d put the phone down.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It is what it is is fine. Especially if it is and there’s nowt you can do about it!

True. Usually very ignorant people who use that phrase!"

I find this to be true. Which is why I never liked it.

Have I become ignorant?

I hope not, that's not me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""Whatever" really racks me off"

and

End of.

Like a petulant teen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate the term ‘smashing it’.

And I’m not keen on ‘most definitely’.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

""Whatever" really racks me off

and

End of.

Like a petulant teen.

Like grow up sometime soon so we can have a conversation

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Bedford (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

What will be, will be ...

...another similar phrase, maybe?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"‘Living my best life.’ I’m not sure exactly why but whenever someone utters that phrase, I have an overwhelming urge to end their existence.

Maybe I’m just a miserable sod? Ahhh well, fuck it. "

This just really made me laugh! A shared love of dark humour…

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

We are where we are

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By *not123Couple
over a year ago

sp1

Hate the saying . It's like they can't be bothered

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By *ayjay218Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen

"Hate the saying . It's like they can't be bothered "
don’t think I have said that well not that I’ve noticed. Heard it quite regularly though and I always thought it is a cop out answer. What does annoy me now is people who say or even type .com added on to a word. I’m busy.com, tired.com etc etc I know I’m probably being fickle but it does touch a nerve

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By *iaisonseekerMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

How about "we are where are"?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not sure how long feel about that or "you do you" and " I have to tell my truth""

Sorry I’m going to have a mini rant.

I have the “my truth” “their truth” thing

absolutely grinds my gears.

You tell your side of what you believe to be true, not a whole new version of truth smh. It’s like listening to nails down a chalkboard, every time I hear it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a big fan of “obviously wasn’t meant to be”

Heard it so many times after a miscarriage and it crushed me every time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

this term helps me a lot because I see things in a very black and white world, so it helps settle my mind if there's something that's out of my control.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"this term helps me a lot because I see things in a very black and white world, so it helps settle my mind if there's something that's out of my control. "

It does. Then I tell myself.

All is well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't like it at all. It's negative, dismissive and justifies far too many shit situations.

So there.....

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By *urplechesterCouple
over a year ago

chester

I use that phrase a lot tbh, and probably annoy the hell out of everyone every time I say it

! I don’t like stressing, it conflicts with my chilled personality haha, so when something’s a bit shite but you have zero control over it then ‘it is what it is’ I have no power to change it, so crack on

Miss pc

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By *inda May SimmonsTV/TS
over a year ago

hexham

"It is what it is is fine. Especially if it is and there’s nowt you can do about it!

Except me… ( see my profile )

It isn’t meant as aggressive, I tried to get across that I accept what I am and I don’t analyse it, dissect it, try to pigeon hole it or feel the need to justify it.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

To me it just means that the situation is what it is and that's life

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

O am who I am..someone who makes no apologies for being who they are.

Can be a good and bad thing

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't like it at all. It's negative, dismissive and justifies far too many shit situations.

So there.....

I used to have the same attitude towards this statement.

The people that say it tell you, you have the negative attitude.

When the statement itself is negative.

Modern society perhaps? Too busy, no work life balance etc to care. Easier to dismiss a situation.

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By *yron69Man
over a year ago

Fareham

People just love an Aussie style shrug nowadays don’t they?

I don’t think, I’m cool, but in a moment I will blurt out something ignorant and offensive..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"People just love an Aussie style shrug nowadays don’t they?

I don’t think, I’m cool, but in a moment I will blurt out something ignorant and offensive.."

Showing Patience is an even bigger virtue these days.

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By *ushandkittyCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

I dislike 'it is what it is', I reply with ' well it's not what it isnt, is it?'

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