FabSwingers.com forum: Black men only

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No issue with preferences

Absolutely not.

But it’s strange the wording changes

The BLACK ONLY are very abrupt and forthright about it

But if a lady prefers not to meet black guys

She feels the need to apologise for it

‘Sorry just my preference’

Any idea why ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No idea. What do you think?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are people still concerned about who meets who, what race they're etc...

Live and let others live

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Because the weight of other people's disapproval weighs heavy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess because if I was renting a room out and said "no dogs, no blacks, no Irish it's just my preference" it has lots of historical connotations. Something along those lines.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think perhaps because of the reason for the "preference".

What's the most likely reason someone would prefer to meet only black guys, compared to the reason someone would prefer to meet no black guys?

I suspect people can give you reasons for the former, but get very cagey about explaining the latter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmmm

Makes you wonder why we don't all state emphatically that we wont have sex with animals. Were not going to do it, so it must be our preference not too.

So presumably we can apologise for that?

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

It woukd be nice if it were about a personality and not their skin colour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest, we don’t see the point in having that on a profile, it’s very easy to just not reply or engage with anyone outside of your preference without having to feel the need to put exclusions on your profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hmmm

Makes you wonder why we don't all state emphatically that we wont have sex with animals. Were not going to do it, so it must be our preference not too.

So presumably we can apologise for that?"

Erm.. Because we're talking about sex between humans, not animals

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/01/22 17:47:09]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It woukd be nice if it were about a personality and not their skin colour "

You in the wrong place for that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No issue with preferences

Absolutely not.

But it’s strange the wording changes

The BLACK ONLY are very abrupt and forthright about it

But if a lady prefers not to meet black guys

She feels the need to apologise for it

‘Sorry just my preference’

Any idea why ?"

I find both to be worthy of skepticism. Some people fetishize us, some have a “preference” against us. It’s a weird tight rope with finding the right people.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

The judgey people judge.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 17/01/22 17:58:34]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No issue with preferences

Absolutely not.

But it’s strange the wording changes

The BLACK ONLY are very abrupt and forthright about it

But if a lady prefers not to meet black guys

She feels the need to apologise for it

‘Sorry just my preference’

Any idea why ?"

Who cares. And I’m saying that as a non caucasian who often sees such things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No issue with preferences

Absolutely not.

But it’s strange the wording changes

The BLACK ONLY are very abrupt and forthright about it

But if a lady prefers not to meet black guys

She feels the need to apologise for it

‘Sorry just my preference’

Any idea why ?

Who cares. And I’m saying that as a non caucasian who often sees such things."

I guess the OP cared enough to create a topic about it.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

"No issue with preferences

Absolutely not.

But it’s strange the wording changes

The BLACK ONLY are very abrupt and forthright about it

But if a lady prefers not to meet black guys

She feels the need to apologise for it

‘Sorry just my preference’

Any idea why ?"

Why would their be a need to apologize because if the person took the time to read their profile and understood what they are looking for then someone who doesn't fit that criteria technically doesn't have a reason to send a message why would they assuming people only send messages because they have similar interests

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Bottom line is no body has to explain and no need for anyone to need to make it out more than someone's preference it doesn't make them negative towards the person who has the problem is the one whose unable to accept that you don't need to explain why they have a preference sexually

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By *ustyshowoffCouple
over a year ago

Cyprus

We wont meet black guys and we don't feel the need to apologise for it. It's nobody else's business

Mark

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hmmm

Makes you wonder why we don't all state emphatically that we wont have sex with animals. Were not going to do it, so it must be our preference not too.

So presumably we can apologise for that?"

Possibly the worst post to a question I’ve ever seen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We wont meet black guys and we don't feel the need to apologise for it. It's nobody else's business

Mark "

This right here is perfectly reasonable. Sure, ya might wanna question why but it’s their business at the end of the day.

At the same time, people only looking for “BBC” might seem nice but they might be just fetishizing us.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

[Removed by poster at 17/01/22 18:48:54]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To be honest, we don’t see the point in having that on a profile, it’s very easy to just not reply or engage with anyone outside of your preference without having to feel the need to put exclusions on your profile."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Right attitude right here!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure about OPs race but it is something black men on Fab definitely end up pondering eventually. Or at least, I did.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Right attitude right here!"

But it also saves receiving unwanted messages if pointed out rather than someone wondering why no reply it's common sense

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By *aliceWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

I know this will be an unpopular opinion but both are discriminatory. I use that word in full knowledge that we all discriminate ie make choices and have preferences so I'm not using it strictly or solely in a context of prejudice, but when people only meet black men or will not meet any black men you do have to wonder whats behind that. The diferrence in respect to the question of the OP is that people who don't meet black men are aware of how that looks as a negative and feel the need to try and justify it.

Fetishication based on race is dehumanising IMO and it's hard not to see prejudice in the blanket refusal to meet a particular race, particularly when accompanied by statements such as ' due to bad experiences ' which I've seen a few times.

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By *rbane PlayerMan
over a year ago

London

"No issue with preferences

Absolutely not.

But it’s strange the wording changes

The BLACK ONLY are very abrupt and forthright about it

But if a lady prefers not to meet black guys

She feels the need to apologise for it

‘Sorry just my preference’

Any idea why ?"

I don't think anyone needs to nor should explain or apologise for their choices or preferences. I will say that the Scene has lots of sub scenes such as cuckold, bi, interracial, bdsm, and so on, which one is either into or not. These scenes have their own events, even culture and it may be difficult for "outsiders" to understand. If it isn't your interest area or you are not a part of that play style, I would think about not bothering to work out the whys or why nots.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know this will be an unpopular opinion but both are discriminatory. I use that word in full knowledge that we all discriminate ie make choices and have preferences so I'm not using it strictly or solely in a context of prejudice, but when people only meet black men or will not meet any black men you do have to wonder whats behind that. The diferrence in respect to the question of the OP is that people who don't meet black men are aware of how that looks as a negative and feel the need to try and justify it.

This is a reasonable take. Some people have had good experiences with certain groups, some people have had good. Aside from clear indicators given about any harm meant, it’s almost impossible to tell.

Mind ya, I certainly don’t mind momentarily benefiting from being fetishized. It’s just long term and repeat exposure that can wear on ya.

Disclosure: I hold no ill will to anyone who doesn’t wanna meet black men, even if ya have a different reason.

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By *DGF20Man
over a year ago

Dublin

Same story again and again...it's personal preference and it's no one else business...and there is absolutely nothing wrong if someone says I don't want to meet black, asian, old, young or whatever...

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By *edfleetMan
over a year ago

covent garden

If your anti-preferences are going to cause offence or upset best to leave them off your profile and then just disregard the messages you choose.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If your anti-preferences are going to cause offence or upset best to leave them off your profile and then just disregard the messages you choose.

Basically this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If your anti-preferences are going to cause offence or upset best to leave them off your profile and then just disregard the messages you choose.

Also a reasonable position. Some people might’ve had significant experiences tho that inspire em to write such. Still think they should limit what they write, based on the possibility of causing offense?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's because they are stating what they want not what they don't want. If I read a profile and it's just a list of no's I just find it really off putting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hmmm

Makes you wonder why we don't all state emphatically that we wont have sex with animals. Were not going to do it, so it must be our preference not too.

So presumably we can apologise for that?"

That is a slightly strange comparison and take on the subject but I won't delve any deeper, I do wish the world were different though, at the end of the day we're all just very similar but slightly different meatsacks with brains.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lov watch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lov watch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's because they are stating what they want not what they don't want. If I read a profile and it's just a list of no's I just find it really off putting. "

Sorry for raising the dead but wanted to respond to and agree with this!

Someone with a profile of dislikes/not interested in is usually going to be a miserable person, in my experience and opinion.

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By *imGimMan
over a year ago

london

It’s called fetishisation. Black guys are singled out for the BBC. I have many ppl ask about my cock size like it’s any of their business. I’m considerably above average but my dick is mine

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By *imGimMan
over a year ago

london

It’s because we have bigger cocks

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By *imGimMan
over a year ago

london

It’s simple I’m black and I have a 10” cock. So of course if as was the case at a certain naturist place as was the case recently a 20 year old

Japanese woman with possibly the tightest pussy I’ve ever seen comes along, then i am gonna be balls deep inside her, or some dude wants to watch me fuck his wife… it’s a no brainier. I’m black and hung so im not gonna complain when a naked woman is on her knees in a dark room and wants to spend the next half hour sucking my cock. Bottom line is what I have means i can have what I want whenever I want

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/08/22 08:29:34]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Again it's preferences. End of

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