FabSwingers.com forum: ADHD

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So I recently discovered I have ADHD at 40 and now everything makes so much sense. Just curious to know if anyone else got diagnosed as an adult and felt the same.

Only if you’re happy to share though as I know not everyone is happy to share such things.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m so pleased that things are falling into place as a result of your diagnosis

My now 20 year old daughter was diagnosed with high functioning autism at 16 or 17. Still quite late compared to boys. Girls are generally very adept at masking - and mimicking socially acceptable behaviours - hence their relatively late diagnoses.

All the best x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m so pleased that things are falling into place as a result of your diagnosis

All the best x"

My 19 year old son just got diagnosed too, actually his diagnosis led to mine although I hear that’s common as women are brilliant at masking!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So I recently discovered I have ADHD at 40 and now everything makes so much sense. Just curious to know if anyone else got diagnosed as an adult and felt the same.

Only if you’re happy to share though as I know not everyone is happy to share such things."

What kind of things make sense now?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

One of my sons back in the day before it was recognized he is 42 this year was just classed as naughty and disruptive x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Late to the party but after a search I just want to say that being diagnosed last year at 38 validated struggles throughout my entire life and I finally stopped feeling like a fraud and failure as a human being.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

"Late to the party but after a search I just want to say that being diagnosed last year at 38 validated struggles throughout my entire life and I finally stopped feeling like a fraud and failure as a human being.

That's me after I discovered that I'm transgender (only about 12 years ago). Still got a lot of working out to do though.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

How did you get your diagnosis OP?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

Yes. It was a watershed moment for me. Helpfully work paid for my diagnosis over a year ago. Knowing now that what I felt was natural and I’m not just odd or he blunt arsehole people thought I was.

Just had a further referral for what they could do for me yesterday drop in the mailbox. So I’m very much looking forward to unravelling some of the coping mechanisms I put in place over the years as some of them wasn’t always for the best.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m so pleased that things are falling into place as a result of your diagnosis

All the best x"

I didn't know this, Dieu. My 3 boys have HFA. My daughter is likely on the spectrum.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know a few people who've had later diagnoses and it's helped them so much. I don't know at this point if it's menopause or ADD, Ive just suspected it for a couple of years. I tick every box for Attention Deficit Disorder. I have four children all on the autistic spectrum.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urga2076Woman
over a year ago

London

For those of you that are mums- did you notice anything after giving birth? Like how you managed tasks with a screaming baby, stayed on top of housework, felt about

Motherhood?

I’ve been mulling this point over for years but no idea how to get diagnosis. TikTok posts on this have been phenomenal help though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urga2076Woman
over a year ago

London

This resonates so much. So happy for those of you that have those realisations. Doctor literally said to me “what difference will it make to you knowing?”!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *teve_it_aloneMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"So I recently discovered I have ADHD at 40 and now everything makes so much sense. Just curious to know if anyone else got diagnosed as an adult and felt the same.

Only if you’re happy to share though as I know not everyone is happy to share such things."

Strongly suspected for me. It was identified during assessment for another neurodivergent condition (but requires a different set of quals to diagnose), so now waiting for formal assessment for it.

As you say, it just makes everything make sense. I know a lot of people don’t like “labels” and see it as pathologising personality types, but I personally thing it’s valuable - if you can give it a name, you know what you’re dealing with and can take action (whether that’s meds, or otherwise).

I have my hopes up that medication will make a big difference - or at least reduce the amount of caffeine I need to function day to day, so I may be in for disappointment where that’s concerned, but worth a try.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So I recently discovered I have ADHD at 40 and now everything makes so much sense. Just curious to know if anyone else got diagnosed as an adult and felt the same.

Only if you’re happy to share though as I know not everyone is happy to share such things."

Me too, x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want to talk to the doctor about this but don’t know how to go about it.

I’m super glad you got your diagnosis, OP, and hope it helps you on the rest of your journey!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I want to talk to the doctor about this but don’t know how to go about it.

I’m super glad you got your diagnosis, OP, and hope it helps you on the rest of your journey! "

It’s a long old process. If there’s anyway you can afford to go private then do it. 8 years of hell trying to get a diagnosis through the NHS and hundreds of appointments. Half an hour with a private consultant and we had a diagnosis, new medication and life changed so much from then on. x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes ADD & OCD, last year. It has pretty much ruled my life and its a pettern thats been there from a early age ive never been able to stick to one hobby, women, career, interest ect. Its exhausting to live with as i know perfection isnt possible but i chase it in all areas.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
over a year ago

Pembrokeshire

I got tested, and diagnosed, (The Maudsley Hospital and Kings) when they were testing my son in 92 when I was 32 years old.

I was taking the Ritalin medication for it for a while, but it caused issues, so I stopped.

I hope now you have your diagnosis OP that things make more sense for you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I want to talk to the doctor about this but don’t know how to go about it.

I’m super glad you got your diagnosis, OP, and hope it helps you on the rest of your journey!

Thank you for this! I’m going to look into it today and see where I can get to this week. I’m glad you’ve managed to get the things you need too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

Can I ask those of you who have been diagnosed and have been prescribed medication.

What do you think about the taste of it?

Does the taste put you off taking it?

This is something I was told about quite recently.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *leanor1717Woman
over a year ago

Gillingham

This resonates so much. So happy for those of you that have those realisations. Doctor literally said to me “what difference will it make to you knowing?”!"

Yes this is how I've been feeling too, thinking WHY can't I do things that other people have so much motivation to do? I'm 40 now and went for a referral appt at the docs at the end of January (I explained to the receptionist and she said she needed to book a 30min referral appt, so I think I may have been fast tracked a step by luck

). And I have the consultant appt tomorrow! The assessment/diagnosis is moving so fast it's a bit of a shock, I thought I'd have 6 months to get my head around it

I seem to show mostly the inattentive behaviours and thought patterns, and it would explain so much if I do have it! It would be a total game changer, I might need ADHD meds as well as or instead of antidepressants... there might be something that can help me get the things done that I want to, without having crippling lack of motivation.

I have masked this so well, and the last few months I have been letting the mask drop here and there and it feels so liberating... and perhaps when I go to swinging clubs why I feel like I can finally be myself?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got diagnosed as a child with ADHD. A classic example apparently! I was prescribed ritalin but I wasn't on it for very long due to a family history of heart conditions.

I have lots of coping strategies. Keeping a detailed planner helps and having everything written down helps me. I have even written myself a step by step guide to cleaning my kitchen!

Anyway, you should read Women with Add by Sari Solden and Scattered Minds by Gabor Mate. They're both great.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I want to talk to the doctor about this but don’t know how to go about it.

I’m super glad you got your diagnosis, OP, and hope it helps you on the rest of your journey!

Thank you for this! I’m going to look into it today and see where I can get to this week. I’m glad you’ve managed to get the things you need too

Was my daughter not me but has certainly changed my life x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *leanor1717Woman
over a year ago

Gillingham

I've just been diagnosed with ADHD today.

It's a relief but a lot to get my head around.

Apparently the ADHD brain is like a super hero brain but without the driving manual!

It could be a game changer...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ryandseeMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire

"I've just been diagnosed with ADHD today.

It's a relief but a lot to get my head around.

Apparently the ADHD brain is like a super hero brain but without the driving manual!

It could be a game changer..."

All the best to you and hope you get all the support you need. I am sure its definitely best to know and hopefully lots of things will fall into place.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I want to talk to the doctor about this but don’t know how to go about it.

I’m super glad you got your diagnosis, OP, and hope it helps you on the rest of your journey! "

Yeals go private. Getting a diagnosis on the NHS is next to impossible unless yoynwant to fight with your GP for a decade.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"Can I ask those of you who have been diagnosed and have been prescribed medication.

What do you think about the taste of it?

Does the taste put you off taking it?

This is something I was told about quite recently. "

What does it taste like? It may just be your taste buds

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

"Can I ask those of you who have been diagnosed and have been prescribed medication.

What do you think about the taste of it?

Does the taste put you off taking it?

This is something I was told about quite recently.

What does it taste like? It may just be your taste buds"

It's not me. I know a few people through work that don't take their meds because of the taste. I wondered if it was just them or if it's quite common.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just been diagnosed with ADHD today.

It's a relief but a lot to get my head around.

Apparently the ADHD brain is like a super hero brain but without the driving manual!

It could be a game changer..."

Oh my! How fantastic for you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

"So I recently discovered I have ADHD at 40 and now everything makes so much sense. Just curious to know if anyone else got diagnosed as an adult and felt the same.

Only if you’re happy to share though as I know not everyone is happy to share such things."

I was diagnosed at 30 and left to do everything myself. I'm still digging through things online to understand it fully.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ondon MikeMan
over a year ago

St Albans

35 for me, about six months ago

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

Currently in the process of having my youngest referred and assessed, she has motor and verbal tics so they're suspecting tourettes but want to do a full adhd assessment alongside to make final diagnosis, we got caught up with covid so this is now nearly two years later we're back on track x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I want to talk to the doctor about this but don’t know how to go about it.

I’m super glad you got your diagnosis, OP, and hope it helps you on the rest of your journey!

Definitely agree with this. I had a very similar experience all though in the end I didn't have to go private as I finally got to see someone that actually did something but in total it was 15 years of being on waiting lists and passed from pillar to post and lots of different diagnosis.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hesecretdocMan
over a year ago

Lancashire

Diagnosed with ASD almost three years ago and recognise how valuable a diagnosis is in making sense of life!

Still waiting for an assessment for ADHD as probably have both!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not me but my oldest son has been diagnosed as having higher functioning autism, he’s 12 going on 13 and up until about 2-3 years ago everything was ok but gradually started to get worse, I put it down to lockdowns/covid etc but wasn’t getting any better and he was becoming more withdrawn and was only happy when doing really complex maths puzzles etc, now I know what to do and how to react to things with him he’s doing much better.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

My daughter already had a diagnosis of adhd from the States but still took 15 months to get meds.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 14/03/22 18:56:40]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I want to talk to the doctor about this but don’t know how to go about it.

I’m super glad you got your diagnosis, OP, and hope it helps you on the rest of your journey!

Yeals go private. Getting a diagnosis on the NHS is next to impossible unless yoynwant to fight with your GP for a decade."

This exactly I ended up paying to go private at a place in notts

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *leanor1717Woman
over a year ago

Gillingham

"I've just been diagnosed with ADHD today.

It's a relief but a lot to get my head around.

Apparently the ADHD brain is like a super hero brain but without the driving manual!

It could be a game changer...

All the best to you and hope you get all the support you need. I am sure its definitely best to know and hopefully lots of things will fall into place. "

Thank you, all these years I thought I was lazy and unmotivated, yet driven to have new experiences, and it looks like ADHD could be the root cause of everything!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *leanor1717Woman
over a year ago

Gillingham

"I've just been diagnosed with ADHD today.

It's a relief but a lot to get my head around.

Apparently the ADHD brain is like a super hero brain but without the driving manual!

It could be a game changer...

Oh my! How fantastic for you.

Thank you so much, gonna take a while to sink in though!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

Not diagnosed for ADHD but developed a suspicion over the last year when I realised my Autism diagnosis didn't fully fit.

Took one of my friends ADHD meds recently and it did exactly what it said on the tin, which has confirmed my suspicions in my head. Going to look at formal diagnosis now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

Thank you, all these years I thought I was lazy and unmotivated, yet driven to have new experiences, and it looks like ADHD could be the root cause of everything!"

Executive Dysfunction is a thing for us. We get called lazy but we are far from it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

"Yes ADD & OCD, last year. It has pretty much ruled my life and its a pettern thats been there from a early age ive never been able to stick to one hobby, women, career, interest ect. Its exhausting to live with as i know perfection isnt possible but i chase it in all areas.

See I'm like this... I can never finish a project, short attention span, never had a long relationship, multiple jobs. I read a really good post on FB the other day and could relate to every single point on it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you, all these years I thought I was lazy and unmotivated, yet driven to have new experiences, and it looks like ADHD could be the root cause of everything!

Executive Dysfunction is a thing for us. We get called lazy but we are far from it.

It was when I read about executive dysfunction that I knew something was up.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's me after I discovered that I'm transgender (only about 12 years ago). Still got a lot of working out to do though."

Did it feel like things just clicked into place?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hesecretdocMan
over a year ago

Lancashire

The other interesting thing I am realising is that I get on so much better with other neurodiverse people!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell you what though, my eldest with HFA is about a billion times easier than her neurotypical younger sisters

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I went through 'right to choose' which is private but NHS funded. Google it, has all the bits about referral with forms to email your gp for them to send off. Is a longer waiting period now than when I applied years ago, but nothing like the NHS ones.

Tiktok videos made it all make sense to me. All the little quirks and things I've always felt weird about, being told they're not normal, and being seen as blunt and rude.

There are so many of us in the world, I keep reading we're human version 2.0, the next evolutionary step.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *edonist79Man
over a year ago

Trowbridge

I was diagnosed with innatentive adhd last year. Didn't even consider i had adhd as I thought it was only people who are hyper that had it.

Struggled all my life with motivation, doing things consistently. Usual rewards don't work for me. Yet I can hyper fixate on some things and wont stop until they are done.

For ages just thought I was lazy. Frustrated the hell out of me because I'd want to do things, have it in my head I need to do things, and just couldn't get my brain to start 99% of the time.

Downloaded bloody tik tok during first lockdown. Adhd in adults video popped up randomly. Ticked all the boxes, liked it. Algorithm then give me more. Was like a lighbulb moment. Suddenly realised exactly why I've struggled all my life.

Talked to my doctor. Got diagnosed. Just recently started the journey of finding the right meds and dose for me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *edonist79Man
over a year ago

Trowbridge

"I went through 'right to choose' which is private but NHS funded. Google it, has all the bits about referral with forms to email your gp for them to send off. Is a longer waiting period now than when I applied years ago, but nothing like the NHS ones.

Tiktok videos made it all make sense to me. All the little quirks and things I've always felt weird about, being told they're not normal, and being seen as blunt and rude.

There are so many of us in the world, I keep reading we're human version 2.0, the next evolutionary step. "

I think tiktok is responsible for a big increase in adults realising they may have adhd. Also went through a right to choose on psychiatry uk. Learned about that on tik tok too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *edonist79Man
over a year ago

Trowbridge

Thank you, all these years I thought I was lazy and unmotivated, yet driven to have new experiences, and it looks like ADHD could be the root cause of everything!

Executive Dysfunction is a thing for us. We get called lazy but we are far from it.

It was when I read about executive dysfunction that I knew something was up. "

Yup. Hated myself for being lazy. For not being able to motivate myself consistently even when I really wanted to do something. Learning about executive disfunction was such a relief to me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Encouraged by a friend on here, I rang my GP today and I have a telephone appt next week to talk about this. I feel very nervous and a bit of a fake. It's just getting harder and harder to get past the brain fog to complete tasks.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP is gone, but for anybody else curious, the medications are a godsend if you have inattentive ADHD.

It gives you somewhat a sense of urgency that you otherwise don't have; if you procrastinate and feel complacent a lot of the time, then these will help mitigate that to some extent.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hesecretdocMan
over a year ago

Lancashire

"Encouraged by a friend on here, I rang my GP today and I have a telephone appt next week to talk about this. I feel very nervous and a bit of a fake. It's just getting harder and harder to get past the brain fog to complete tasks. "

Well done! I was chasing my referral last week and was told it will be late 2024 before I am seen!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hesecretdocMan
over a year ago

Lancashire

"OP is gone, but for anybody else curious, the medications are a godsend if you have inattentive ADHD.

It gives you somewhat a sense of urgency that you otherwise don't have; if you procrastinate and feel complacent a lot of the time, then these will help mitigate that to some extent."

Definitely need them then! Procrastination is my middle name!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *urvytreatWoman
over a year ago

somewhere nice

I was diagnosed with autism back in September at 45 years old, everything makes sense now and because I know why I do certain things certain ways life is easier. My 2 brothers were both diagnosed autistic in their mid 30’s, my 3rd brother who died at age 7 was definitely on the spectrum too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well done! I was chasing my referral last week and was told it will be late 2024 before I am seen!"

oh that is so dispiriting. I can't afford to go private. I'm just not functioning.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve got it. I’ve always had it. Recently had it reconfirmed after going back into education. Since I’ve discovered TikTok it’s like everyone’s more aware of it and life makes sense.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you, all these years I thought I was lazy and unmotivated, yet driven to have new experiences, and it looks like ADHD could be the root cause of everything!

Executive Dysfunction is a thing for us. We get called lazy but we are far from it.

It was when I read about executive dysfunction that I knew something was up.

Yup. Hated myself for being lazy. For not being able to motivate myself consistently even when I really wanted to do something. Learning about executive disfunction was such a relief to me. "

I think I am lazy. I just can't get things done. I've read about executive dysfunction but haven't figured out how to manage mine!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

Well done! I was chasing my referral last week and was told it will be late 2024 before I am seen!

oh that is so dispiriting. I can't afford to go private. I'm just not functioning."

Your health authority may be different and your referral will come through quicker.

One day at a time. And keep talking about it, talking is good.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well done! I was chasing my referral last week and was told it will be late 2024 before I am seen!

oh that is so dispiriting. I can't afford to go private. I'm just not functioning.

Your health authority may be different and your referral will come through quicker.

One day at a time. And keep talking about it, talking is good. "

It took two years for my kids to get a diagnosis so I think I know what I'm in for. I will wait until I speak to my GP.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hesecretdocMan
over a year ago

Lancashire

Thank you, all these years I thought I was lazy and unmotivated, yet driven to have new experiences, and it looks like ADHD could be the root cause of everything!

Executive Dysfunction is a thing for us. We get called lazy but we are far from it.

It was when I read about executive dysfunction that I knew something was up.

Yup. Hated myself for being lazy. For not being able to motivate myself consistently even when I really wanted to do something. Learning about executive disfunction was such a relief to me.

I think I am lazy. I just can't get things done. I've read about executive dysfunction but haven't figured out how to manage mine! "

When you figure it out please lete know!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread