FabSwingers.com forum: Message on read

By *ookingforfun9970 OP Man
over a year ago

wilts

Do you ever leave someone on read even when they have clearly put a lot of effort into the message ?

Recently found it had happened to me a couple of times, I always take the time to respond even if I am not interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I clear my sent messages box, and dont worry about them anymore. If I get a reply, it’s a lovely surprise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It matters not whether I delete, respond or reply. Someone will always get stroppy..

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

We never leave messages unread but quite a few people leave ours unread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It matters not whether I delete, respond or reply. Someone will always get stroppy.."

Oops, I meant leave on read. Respond and reply are the same thing obviously!

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By *nto the LouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

I’m afraid so, I read all of my messages but I rarely reply

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

"I clear my sent messages box, and dont worry about them anymore. If I get a reply, it’s a lovely surprise. "

I don't even go that far, I just don't check it.

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By *nto the LouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

"I’m afraid so, I read all of my messages but I rarely reply "

Unless it’s forum related I should add

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah sometimes when I feel like the conversation would end naturally

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I always try to reply to well written messages, even if it's a no thanks.

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By *ookingforfun9970 OP Man
over a year ago

wilts

"It matters not whether I delete, respond or reply. Someone will always get stroppy..

Oops, I meant leave on read. Respond and reply are the same thing obviously! "

Even when you respond to say you are not interested ? Seems like fab has lost its politeness recently

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always reply with an autographed picture of myself

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By *ookingforfun9970 OP Man
over a year ago

wilts

"I’m afraid so, I read all of my messages but I rarely reply "

Is that due to the volume of messages you receive or ?

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By *nto the LouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

"I’m afraid so, I read all of my messages but I rarely reply

Is that due to the volume of messages you receive or ?"

Partly that, partly because my status says I’m not meeting anyway and partly because messaging to say no thank you often creates more problems than you’d imagine. Somebody local to me was complaining on his status yesterday about people being rude and not replying to messages. I went back and counted and I’d had messages from 128 people in the four days since I’d received his.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It matters not whether I delete, respond or reply. Someone will always get stroppy..

Oops, I meant leave on read. Respond and reply are the same thing obviously!

Even when you respond to say you are not interested ? Seems like fab has lost its politeness recently "

I find this amusing. The fab population is so rude because they don't reply to me. What a load of rubbish.

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By *herry OnatopWoman
over a year ago

Just over there

I try really hard to reply to most messages but what happens is in the time it's taken to reply to say 100 messages, another 70 have arrived! Plus responses back! Then messages unread at the bottom start to vanish and you're back to square one!

So apologies if you feel you've been ignored but it's not quite that simple a lot of the time!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It matters not whether I delete, respond or reply. Someone will always get stroppy..

Oops, I meant leave on read. Respond and reply are the same thing obviously!

Even when you respond to say you are not interested ? Seems like fab has lost its politeness recently "

Yes even then. They'll ask why, try to convince otherwise, its an endless task

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By *JcouplemidlandsCouple
over a year ago

Peak District

What we have noticed (not saying you do this) is that we get what appears to be a well written message but then notice that the exact word for word message was sent a few weeks before so clearly just copy and paste.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never copy and paste a message it's always different to each person i message and I always put effort in, it's just plain rude when it's read and deleted. I'd take a simple no thank you message over being blanked.

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By *ussle SproutMan
over a year ago

the middle

"I’m afraid so, I read all of my messages but I rarely reply

Is that due to the volume of messages you receive or ?

In the time it took you to count them you could of replied to him

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By *ookingforfun9970 OP Man
over a year ago

wilts

"What we have noticed (not saying you do this) is that we get what appears to be a well written message but then notice that the exact word for word message was sent a few weeks before so clearly just copy and paste. "

Oh that’s interesting, never thought people would copy and paste messages

I always read the profile and come up with a message to the individual/ individuals I am interested in

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By *nto the LouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

"I’m afraid so, I read all of my messages but I rarely reply

Is that due to the volume of messages you receive or ?

In the time it took you to count them you could of replied to him

I did reply at that point to explain why I hadn’t replied

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By *ussle SproutMan
over a year ago

the middle

"I’m afraid so, I read all of my messages but I rarely reply

Is that due to the volume of messages you receive or ?

In the time it took you to count them you could of replied to him

I did reply at that point to explain why I hadn’t replied

Oh you are a good one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m afraid so, I read all of my messages but I rarely reply

Is that due to the volume of messages you receive or ?

In the time it took you to count them you could of replied to him

As stated it can create problems saying no thank you, some guys see it as a window of opportunity because you've answered, even with a no thank you .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It matters not whether I delete, respond or reply. Someone will always get stroppy..

Oops, I meant leave on read. Respond and reply are the same thing obviously!

Even when you respond to say you are not interested ? Seems like fab has lost its politeness recently

I find this amusing. The fab population is so rude because they don't reply to me. What a load of rubbish. "

I got called rude, a fake and told I was spoiling it for genuine people today...because I didn't reply

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By *ookingforfun9970 OP Man
over a year ago

wilts

"I try really hard to reply to most messages but what happens is in the time it's taken to reply to say 100 messages, another 70 have arrived! Plus responses back! Then messages unread at the bottom start to vanish and you're back to square one!

So apologies if you feel you've been ignored but it's not quite that simple a lot of the time!

Well I can see why you’re flooded with messages

but that’s something I’d never really thought about the messages being buried under others and disappearing

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By *randmrsmanchesterCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

We reply to well written message's from couples and singles even if we are not interested. If it's a single male that's new and we are not interested, we put a bit of encouragement into the reply about the good bits of the message ect and politely decline

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've already mentioned on another thread, that I'd prefer that people just delete my message from the get go, rather than engage in dialogue if they're not really interested..

But I've just remembered, I have done this once or twice, when I knew there was no prospect of me meeting them...

..I just allowed the exchange to fizzle out naturally.

I'm holding to my position though. Just delete if not interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to get to those ones and reply. But even the long well written ones seem like copy pasta jobs often.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm afraid I do this. I read them all because I'm incredibly nosy, sometimes I intend on replying later and then it gets lost amongst the throng, other times I just forget to delete them, nothing personal but it is impossible to reply to everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nothing to do with politeness.

The sheer volume of messages sometimes - to even reply no thanks, then invites why not, etc

I come on here to speak to friends, come on the forums, not spend half my time replying to messages.

No reply is a no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I sometimes read and then click unread - as leaving on read you often get a second message of abuse for not replying.

Can’t win

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I mostly get left on 'unread', for a very long time too, which to me is more annoying and unclear. Its a clearer answer for me being left on 'read' with no reply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never copy and paste a message it's always different to each person i message and I always put effort in, it's just plain rude when it's read and deleted. I'd take a simple no thank you message over being blanked. "

It is not rude. Women get hundreds of messages. Our time is our own to use a see see fit, and I refuse to be the ‘good girl’ just to be considered polite.

Sometimes I don’t even look at my inbox.

Plus when you reply, then they can get round your filters.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I mostly just leave messages from anyone I don’t know from forums unread and then delete them a day or two later.

My profile clearly says I’m not interested.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mostly get left on 'unread', for a very long time too, which to me is more annoying and unclear. Its a clearer answer for me being left on 'read' with no reply"

None too bothered about that one..I just delete my copy after a brief period...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mostly get left on 'unread', for a very long time too, which to me is more annoying and unclear. Its a clearer answer for me being left on 'read' with no reply

None too bothered about that one..I just delete my copy after a brief period..."

Yeah i leave it just under a couple weeks before i delete my copy of the message if its left on 'unread' for that long.

Id rather the message be read without a reply or simply deleted, i dont want to be left hanging for a stupid length of time without any clear answer.

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

I never ever check.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mostly get left on 'unread', for a very long time too, which to me is more annoying and unclear. Its a clearer answer for me being left on 'read' with no reply"

The inbox only shows two pages of messages, any more than that and they sort of fall off the bottom, we can’t see them. So if not been read there’s no way we can access them

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By *nked rascalMan
over a year ago

Burton on Trent

Those who want to chat, will chat. Just got to remember that women on here, are in general pretty decent (who I’ve contacted), but also probably overwhelmed with messages, so give them space and time…you’ll forget you’ve sent them a message eventually haha!

My POV would be to have thick skin, but keep putting the effort in, and have a bit of fun with it.

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