FabSwingers.com forum: How do you know when you're getting old?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This discussion started at a motorbike rally campfire during a rare weekend we weren't all under lockdown. As I am getting old, I can't remember all the comments, but I thought I'd start it off here as it was amusing, to say the least (though I was very very d*unk so just about anything was amusing at that point):

1) It takes you all night to do what you used to do all night.

2) You dream of a cup of tea and a slice of cake, not a pint.

Feel free to add your own!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can’t be bothered with people’s random BS!

Patience runs real thin x

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Kettering

When you go to the doctor with an issue and he tells you that your problem is common for older people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You seem to grow hair out of places you’d never seen hair before.

My fucking ears are a nightmare to keep hair free these days.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you go to the doctor with an issue and he tells you that your problem is common for older people

That's if I remembered what I went there for in the first place

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You eye up bikes more for comfy saddle than looks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The feeling I got when I put on my new baffies not so long ago

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

You start making weird noises when you need to stand up or sit down, and your body cracks more than a pepper mill

LvM

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Doctors and police people and teachers look like teenagers x

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

You start to value people for their personality and intelligence over their looks.

Marks and Spencer’s clothes start to look good and actually fit you well.

Having a bit of a tummy is fine and your partner agrees.

You are able to laugh at yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guys in their 40s tell me they want an older woman!

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

"You start making weird noises when you need to stand up or sit down, and your body cracks more than a pepper mill

LvM"

When young whipper snappers say they are old

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By *ryandseeMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Depends, used to be when you start drawing your pension but lots of pensioners can put younger people to shame these days. Its a cliche but it's true - you are as old as you feel - so live your life and forget your age

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By *ny1localMan
over a year ago

READING

You find yourself having to buy more bereavement cards and less birthday ones.

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By *aughty but nice...Man
over a year ago

Staffs

On your 20th birthday you go clubbing

On your 30th birthday you just go to the pub but stay out late

On your 35th birthday you go to the pub but want to in bed by 11:30 pm

On your 45th birthday you just want to go out for Sunday lunch

Just wanting Sunday lunch shows you are getting old ....lol

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Kettering

"On your 20th birthday you go clubbing

On your 30th birthday you just go to the pub but stay out late

On your 35th birthday you go to the pub but want to in bed by 11:30 pm

On your 45th birthday you just want to go out for Sunday lunch

Just wanting Sunday lunch shows you are getting old ....lol"

This is so true !

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

"Depends, used to be when you start drawing your pension but lots of pensioners can put younger people to shame these days. Its a cliche but it's true - you are as old as you feel - so live your life and forget your age

16 months and I can draw my pension not like I'm counting down or anything!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The doctor has to finger your arse in a none sexual manner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I'd rather slob out on the sofa than make an effort and meet someone.

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By *heirry84Man
over a year ago

Midlands

When all new music sounds like someone using the toilet... No reference to South Park

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By *ryandseeMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire

16 months and I can draw my pension not like I'm counting down or anything!

Well, enjoy. I am sure you worked hard for it.

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By *heirry84Man
over a year ago

Midlands

"The doctor has to finger your arse in a none sexual manner "

I wonder how much for them to do it in a sexual manner?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The doctor has to finger your arse in a none sexual manner

I wonder how much for them to do it in a sexual manner? "

Well it costs me £80 just for a doctors signature so I imagine pretty pricey

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By *uv2kissMan
over a year ago

fenland

When you buy a 40th birthday card for your son

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can’t be bothered with people’s random BS!

Patience runs real thin x "

Definitely this

When I was young, I wouldn’t say a word, I’d tolerate bullshit and be a real people pleaser.

Not anymore. I’m quite blunt and my happiness comes first always

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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago

Near Wells

When you receive messages from guys and then realise you're probably older than their parents!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The one I remember from the campfire was:

When you have more divorces than dogs.

My mates are b@st@rds, the lot of them...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any type of movement hurts and usually involves some kind of groaning..

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

You prefer biscuits to chocolate and wear bedsocks in bed.

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By *al kalMan
over a year ago

london

When you contribute to this thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you receive messages from guys and then realise you're probably older than their parents! "

Exactly, I’m telling 30 year olds that they are too young for me! God I’m old

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel like if I ever wanted to wear pyjamas to bed, that’s when I’d know.

Hangovers seem far longer too, even if I drink less than the younger years

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you start complaining of the dark winter days. Start worrying about clothes for warmth rather than look.

When you start looking at a cars fuel economy rather than top speed or acceleration figures.

When you stop finding people older than you attractive.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"On your 20th birthday you go clubbing

On your 30th birthday you just go to the pub but stay out late

On your 35th birthday you go to the pub but want to in bed by 11:30 pm

On your 45th birthday you just want to go out for Sunday lunch

Just wanting Sunday lunch shows you are getting old ....lol"

This made me laugh but I’m the opposite ….

18th I was sober and the parents were d*unk, I put them to bed with a bucket

21st admittedly lasted a month

30th went out for a meal

31st was out for 36 hours, drinking, eating & dancing.

40th went out for lunch but 41st I rolled in at 3am two nights later

49th went for lunch which tuned into a 6am finish, up next day for round two

51st will be similar to 49th

My mates say I’m getting younger as I get older

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By *tarflyLouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

"When you contribute to this thread

And have to put your reading glasses on to do it!

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

When your arm isn’t long enough to read a menu, realisation you need glasses

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

You're comfortable in your own skin, you appreciate quality and the small pleasures in life, you don't give a twopenny damn what strangers think of you and you have a very finely honed bull shit detector.

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

"When your arm isn’t long enough to read a menu, realisation you need glasses "

Thank fuck I’m not the only one to do this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you contribute to this thread

And have to put your reading glasses on to do it!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You seem to grow hair out of places you’d never seen hair before.

My fucking ears are a nightmare to keep hair free these days."

Thank God I ain't the only one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When watching antiques roadshow which in its self makes you old but remember buying the item new

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By *atie-friendlyTV/TS
over a year ago

Cheltenham

You realise the 90's were 30 years ago not just the other day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On Fab- your inbox goes quiet!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

When a young guy talks to you in a bar it's to get advice about his girlfriend of what to buy his mum for Christmas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When the doctor says sorry,there's nothing more I can do to fix your knee/back (insert appropriate body part!!)..its wear and tear!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You…..you, erm, hmmm? What was I about to say. I’ll go out and come in again

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By *angerous123Man
over a year ago

Leeds

When you care less and less about what people think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your bollocks dip into the water as you sit for a shit…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On your 20th birthday you go clubbing

On your 30th birthday you just go to the pub but stay out late

On your 35th birthday you go to the pub but want to in bed by 11:30 pm

On your 45th birthday you just want to go out for Sunday lunch

Just wanting Sunday lunch shows you are getting old ....lol

This is so true !

I want a Sunday lunch all the time lately

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you go for a pee everytime you pass a loo just incase

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When watching antiques roadshow which in its self makes you old but remember buying the item new "

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

You see massive boobs and think that they'd be comfortable.

Your little one mimics the noises you make getting off the sofa.

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow

The videogame consoles you played are now classed as vintage classics .

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

When you watch a documentary about Brian Clough and the Nottingham Forest side that won its first European Cup in 1980 and you can name every player even though you don't support them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When my "looked at you today" number dropped by 80%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It takes two days to recover from a heavy day/night session.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

When you're listening to the radio and you realise that the 80's was more than a few years ago.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you ache in the morning just from sleeping in a different position during the night.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When even men stop messaging me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When even men stop messaging me. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you look at police officers and they all in your kids age

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By *aughty but nice...Man
over a year ago

Staffs

"On your 20th birthday you go clubbing

On your 30th birthday you just go to the pub but stay out late

On your 35th birthday you go to the pub but want to in bed by 11:30 pm

On your 45th birthday you just want to go out for Sunday lunch

Just wanting Sunday lunch shows you are getting old ....lol

This made me laugh but I’m the opposite ….

18th I was sober and the parents were d*unk, I put them to bed with a bucket

21st admittedly lasted a month

30th went out for a meal

31st was out for 36 hours, drinking, eating & dancing.

40th went out for lunch but 41st I rolled in at 3am two nights later

49th went for lunch which tuned into a 6am finish, up next day for round two

51st will be similar to 49th

My mates say I’m getting younger as I get older

Age is nothing but a number

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By *atricia ParnelWoman
over a year ago

In a town full of colours

My knees hate me after climbing 4 flights of stairs

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South

My eyesight has gone to seed. I have to use binoculars to read small print these days.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My eyesight has gone to seed. I have to use binoculars to read small print these days.

So that's why you insist cock pics are of erect and not flaccid penises

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wanting to visit music free pubs so you chat with friends, rather then shout.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South

"My eyesight has gone to seed. I have to use binoculars to read small print these days.

So that's why you insist cock pics are of erect and not flaccid penises

Yes, just be glad I don’t play darts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My eyesight has gone to seed. I have to use binoculars to read small print these days.

So that's why you insist cock pics are of erect and not flaccid penises

Yes, just be glad I don’t play darts

You can't beat a bit of Bully!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I'd rather slob out on the sofa than make an effort and meet someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your kids go to bed later than you do

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

When you are no longer able to guess the age of a under age drinker in a pub!

Also, when you stop caring!!!

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By *ickdasterdly51Man
over a year ago

Lingfield

I have to walk down our narrow stairs sideways as I'm not sure my knees can take going down normally.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look in the mirror!

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

More cracking than a bowl of rice krispies

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By *atriciayoiditTV/TS
over a year ago

hatfield

"This discussion started at a motorbike rally campfire during a rare weekend we weren't all under lockdown. As I am getting old, I can't remember all the comments, but I thought I'd start it off here as it was amusing, to say the least (though I was very very d*unk so just about anything was amusing at that point):

1) It takes you all night to do what you used to do all night.

2) You dream of a cup of tea and a slice of cake, not a pint.

Feel free to add your own!"
you start enjoying your life.

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By *2pblokeMan
over a year ago

Penrith, Cumbria

when you get referred to as a "Daddy" or a DILF

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By *merald Eyes XWoman
over a year ago

Can you find me….

Getting up in the night to go for a pee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you can't bend the same to shave your balls and arse

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By *utcock61Man
over a year ago

glasgow

lol,true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your knees creek and crunch when your standing up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Getting up in the night to go for a pee

"
I go 3 or 4 tines now it's ridiculous

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By *estmids71Man
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

Looking for fur lined comfy warm slippers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When Last of the summer wine makes you laugh. That's it. Your fucked.

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By *iger4uWoman
over a year ago

In my happy place

When your footwear of choice is a slipper with a back in

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By *aptain Caveman41Man
over a year ago

Home

When you get out of bed in the morning and sound like an old barn door creaking

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Just when you realise you know everything, you start to forget everything you know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When Last of the summer wine makes you laugh. That's it. Your fucked.

Shoot me if that happens....please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you can’t get your head around the fact people you work with were born after 2000

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your knees crack in the morning and last thing at night

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

You ask your kids to do things like set the new TV up. If you’re really old you ask them how to use it once it’s set up !

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Bollocks. I FEEL about 85. Possibly 86. Perhaps I should look into funeral plans. Do you get free pens with them?

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Not sure I'm still in my prime

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

When you get excited about your new tom and jerry pjs

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
over a year ago

Pembrokeshire

when your friends kids start driving cars

it happened to me, somebody I was at school with told me her daughter had a car... I was gobsmacked lol

where DOES the time go???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bollocks. I FEEL about 85. Possibly 86. Perhaps I should look into funeral plans. Do you get free pens with them? "

Michael Parkinson apparently gives free pens and a folder if you sign up with his crowd. Very fancy.

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By *uby StarCouple
over a year ago

Durham

When you get cramp during a good sex session. It's really not good, but very funny.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

When the nurse in the waiting room says........ 'Come along young lady' ... when it's your appt time.

I SWEAR that before long you will read a headline about a serial killer O.A.P.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When talking to someone at a nightclub or any 18+ event and they say the year they were born is 2000 and…

I know I’m not old but that one hits different

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

ALSO ! ALSO! When someone mentioned Gen Zee and I thought ........fuck me the millenials are old now ...... I'm just ancient! ( but not in my head )

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

In the kitchen cooking…. Trying to read cooking instructions and can’t find glasses (again)

So have to resort to using the camera on my phone to enlarge the size of the writing on the packet!

Ffs

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By *uzie69xTV/TS
over a year ago

Maidstone

When you're discussing dental treatment options and he says "that is what I would recommend for my mum..."

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"When you're discussing dental treatment options and he says "that is what I would recommend for my mum...""

Do NOT .... just Do NOT ......

My dentist said ...... If you were my mum I would say the same.....

I thought he was the only dickhead dentist on the planet ! Now you've got one.

Dentist training school ???

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

Also…. Increasing font size on messages

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By *uzie69xTV/TS
over a year ago

Maidstone

"When you're discussing dental treatment options and he says "that is what I would recommend for my mum..."

Do NOT .... just Do NOT ......

My dentist said ...... If you were my mum I would say the same.....

I thought he was the only dickhead dentist on the planet ! Now you've got one.

Dentist training school ???"

Yerz... I wanted to punch him in the teeth... Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you start enjoying Great British railway journeys with Michael Portillo.

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By *uzie69xTV/TS
over a year ago

Maidstone

"When you start enjoying Great British railway journeys with Michael Portillo."

OMG, the European, Asian and Australian ones are even better... Err... so my aunt tells me ...

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By *ichaelangelaCouple
over a year ago

notts

When watching porn and you think .... hmmm, that bed looks really comfy

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

"When watching porn and you think .... hmmm, that bed looks really comfy"

Pmsl

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By *ichaelangelaCouple
over a year ago

notts

And the 3 rules for growing old.

(1)never pass a toilet.

(2) never waste a hard on

(3) never trust a fart

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

"When you start enjoying Great British railway journeys with Michael Portillo.

OMG, the European, Asian and Australian ones are even better... Err... so my aunt tells me ..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When taking your jeans off becomes hard work...

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

When you start ringing round for Stairlift quotes

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By *oonshadowWoman
over a year ago

COVENTRY

When all you want is a pair of big pants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when you show your grandkids a record player / vinyl record and they ask what the fucks that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you sing along to a song then realise it's 50 years old !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you work with people who have never known a world without wifi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you remember using a phone box to make a call.

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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago

Burnleyish (She/They)

"When your arm isn’t long enough to read a menu, realisation you need glasses "

My husband laughs at me, I wear glasses for distance (anything over 10/12 inches is distance), when I'm reading I now have to look over the top of my glasses as I don't need reading glasses but my eye can't adjust to reading through my glasses...

Apparently varifocals are in my not too distant future

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When going to bed early is an exciting evening..

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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago

Burnleyish (She/They)

"Wanting to visit music free pubs so you chat with friends, rather then shout. "

Yep that's my stage of life... quiet local pub with real ale,

Oh and getting a CAMRA membership

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By *aggy dollsCouple
over a year ago

Bradford

When you go from simply falling over to having "had a fall".

Mr Hayes.

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By *moothshaftMan
over a year ago

Coventry

When that little yellow message inbox hardly ever lights up on here. And filters exclude you 90% of the time!

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By *yron69Man
over a year ago

Fareham

When cutting your own toenails needs careful planning.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you have to watch ITV4 or GOLD to remember when your clothes were trendy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you go upstairs to do something and can’t remember what it was when you get there…..

Growing old is inevitable - acting your age is optional ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As said before making the "umpphh" noise when you try and get up, or an "aaaahhhh" when you sit down.

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By *ickdasterdly51Man
over a year ago

Lingfield

When I was 55 I received some junk mail advertising 'senior living apartments', one of the selling points was a relaxing communal living room with a piano in it. I felt very old....

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By *al01Man
over a year ago

solihull

Everything hurts !!!!

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

When I have reading glasses in pretty much every room in the house!

Need them to read now,and never know where they are

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By *ev257Man
over a year ago

cardiff

You know when you're getting old when it takes you all night long to do what you use to do all night.

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull

"When I have reading glasses in pretty much every room in the house!

Need them to read now,and never know where they are"

I do this too. But still end up using my phone to photograph labels I’m supermarkets so I can then zoom in and read them because I forgot to put glasses in my bag!

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

When the Funeral Plan leaflets come through the letter box

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When it takes you 5 minutes to get back up off your knees when you tried to do that spare of the moment seductive blowjob

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By *aughty but nice...Man
over a year ago

Staffs

When cramp sets in midway through play

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When the max age on profiles is 10 years less than your age.

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting up on the night for a wee

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"When cramp sets in midway through play

The more I read, the more I believe I'm old before my time. My hip has attempted to dislocate then cramps up during sex since pretty much forever

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't seem to get up without saying 'aw my back'

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Not bothered about staying in Friday/Saturday nights.

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

"When I have reading glasses in pretty much every room in the house!

Need them to read now,and never know where they are

I do this too. But still end up using my phone to photograph labels I’m supermarkets so I can then zoom in and read them because I forgot to put glasses in my bag!

Me too!

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

Having to wear glasses when :

Shopping

Using phone

Using computer

Reading the backs of food in pica 8 or than.

Restaurant menus

Bloody 'ell it's endless.....

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By *ucksguy2000Man
over a year ago

aylesbury

When your children keep mentioning Care Homes lol

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

"When you go from simply falling over to having "had a fall".

Mr Hayes. "

And everyone panics rather than laughs when you do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When the TV is always too loud

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you ache getting out of bed lol

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By *atriciayoiditTV/TS
over a year ago

hatfield

1) It takes you all night to do what you used to do all night.

2) You dream of a cup of tea and a slice of cake, not a pint.

Feel free to add your own!"
sorry..i cant hear what you have written...speak up...where ever you are...??

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By *inda May SimmonsTV/TS
over a year ago

hexham

When you wake up in the morning , go to get out of bed and realise your body is aching more than it was when you went to bed!

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By *rucking-HellMan
over a year ago

Northampton

I was in a pub in Leicester on Boxing night, and the young bartender wandered through the pub wearing a chunky knit cardigan, and my first thought was "Cor! That's a nice cardigan".

I stunned myself with that one.

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By *ny1localMan
over a year ago

READING

"And the 3 rules for growing old.

(1)never pass a toilet.

(2) never waste a hard on

(3) never trust a fart"
I think Jack Nicholson was quoted as saying that.

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By *ny1localMan
over a year ago

READING

"You ask your kids to do things like set the new TV up. If you’re really old you ask them how to use it once it’s set up !

"
mine gave me grief when I asked how to use it..I reminded him,,, I taught him how to use a spoon

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By *ollbiMan
over a year ago

newcastle

When an old lady offers her seat on the bus.mortifying.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

I wouldn’t know myself, but just ask Granny Crumpet, she has inside information on oldies stuff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When my ear hair grows faster than the hair on my head

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By *erry bull1Man
over a year ago

doncaster

When your dreams are dry

And your farts are wet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you’re listen to the radio and hear remixes of club classics from the 90s with ‘youngsters’ making out its new

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By *smCouple
over a year ago

Liskeard

"You're comfortable in your own skin, you appreciate quality and the small pleasures in life, you don't give a twopenny damn what strangers think of you and you have a very finely honed bull shit detector.

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By *aramel.desiresMan
over a year ago

London

When you have a long handle shoe horn at the front door.

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By *itzimadCouple
over a year ago

harwich

most of what ive read here is middle aged angst when your old you wake up one morning and know your old unfortunately your body forgot to tell your brain

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By *tamina GentMan
over a year ago

Fareham

When you realise you should be on “Flab Swingers” and not Fabswingers

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By *oonshadowWoman
over a year ago

COVENTRY

When you love the Bee Gees. I love them now, I never used to.

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By *ilverjagMan
over a year ago

swansea

You touch up the side burns with Just for Men, so you don't go unnoticed in supermarkets, and you go to Holland and Barrett for zinc tablets to ensure that seminal fluid production remains at capacity levels for your next intimate encounter.

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Kettering

You continuously go around turning lights off that others have left on! Come to think of it thats not a sign of getting old but a sign of common sense!(same thing really)

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

I've been attempting to grow a beard (ok so I'm too lazy to shave recently) & it's a combination of grey, brown & ginger. More grey than anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You respond to threads like this...

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

As a man, you start to develop evil wizard eyebrows….

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By *ategoodbyeMan
over a year ago

Hertfordshire

When you have to decide just how much hair you’l let yourself lose before just shaving the rest off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

By back hurts from scrolling.

Not in the ‘Israelite editable documentation sense of the word’, although that would make you old too.

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By *evoncplCouple
over a year ago

holsworthy

When you cum and it doesn't shoot very far let alone hit your own face ??

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By *reasyontheeyesMan
over a year ago

out in the sticks

"When you cum and it doesn't shoot very far let alone hit your own face ??"

Do you think so?

I can still fire one over my shoulder at times.

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