FabSwingers.com forum: Can a person change from bad to good?

By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

I was watching a christmas carol with patrick stewart. I like him, he is a very good actor and I like the christmas message that was given that a person can change from bad to good if they really want too, do you think that one can change? I believe that one can do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. I was once bad at blowjobs. Now I'm good. Mediocre. "get the job done, just".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes. I was once bad at blowjobs. Now I'm good. Mediocre. "get the job done, just".

It isn't possible to be bad at blowjobs

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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago

Dublin

"Yes. I was once bad at blowjobs. Now I'm good. Mediocre. "get the job done, just".

More practice and you'll be excellent.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

"Yes. I was once bad at blowjobs. Now I'm good. Mediocre. "get the job done, just".

Hmm what scale are you using to measure your suckcess at going from bad to good?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, I think they can. I don’t really believe the ‘leopards can’t change their spots’

If people want to change, and put the work in, and grow and develop, then they can certainly change for the better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes. I was once bad at blowjobs. Now I'm good. Mediocre. "get the job done, just".

Hmm what scale are you using to measure your suckcess at going from bad to good?"

The amount of times they say "ouch". 2 or more isn't good.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Yes. I don't think the majority of people are good or bad though, just existing with fuck ups and successes along the way. But yes, development is possible. Maybe the person was "bad" because of additional things they had going on? I think everyone has the capacity for growth. Whether or not they choose to do is a different thing altogether.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I don't subscribe to that the vast majority people being totally bad or good. I think depending on circumstances they make a choice. Sometimes it'll be good others bad. Though I think people can grow and learn so that they can make better choices.

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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago

Dublin

As for the question. They definitely can. People grow with tine. I'm a much differt person then the person I was in my 20s. I might not have ever been inherently "bad" but I did things I regret looking back on them and things I'd never do again. But I learnt from those experiences too and became a better person because of them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes they can but society needs to let them and be forgiving.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, absolutely. It's all about the mindset.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s very difficult to change who you really are without doing a lot of hard work on a consistent basis. People are much better disguising that changing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes, I think they can. I don’t really believe the ‘leopards can’t change their spots’

If people want to change, and put the work in, and grow and develop, then they can certainly change for the better."

First step is always to admit and realise the issue that needs addressing. If that step’s missing then chances are that any change will be all talk or short lived.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who judges what's good and what's bad?

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By *lice MaliceWoman
over a year ago

The Facility

People change all the time from good to bad so it's only logical that they can change in the other direction too.

Like any bad habit though, or addiction, you have to really want to change in a positive way and then work hard at it in order to achieve the change.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah I believe so I think it takes time though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mmmm, yeah. But a select few, have the c**t gene. They're just born that way. There's possiblity of redemption

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

Only if they want to

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By *ack688Man
over a year ago

abruzzo Italy (and UK)

I think that most people see themselves as the hero in their own story, that they maybe sometimes do bad things, but for what they often see as good reasons, or at least reasons they feel they can justify to themselves. The difficulty with change is firstly accepting that those beliefs are flawed, and being able to ‘see’ a version of themselves that fits far more with the current expectations of society and choosing to work towards it. Whether that change is then truly an inner change, or merely one of training themselves to appear ‘better’, even to the point of fooling themselves, that’s the bit I doubt.

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By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

"Yes, I think they can. I don’t really believe the ‘leopards can’t change their spots’

If people want to change, and put the work in, and grow and develop, then they can certainly change for the better."
Yes. I also believe that it is all about effort to make to make the change too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But being bad is more fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely yes. I've said it before and will happily admit it again, I used to be very opinionated about other people's life choices with regards to sexuality and I regret being like that. I understand so much more now and that's through talking to those very people and having a very understanding friend who has helped me to see things more clearly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mmmm, yeah. But a select few, have the c**t gene. They're just born that way. There's possiblity of redemption"

*There's no possibility of redemption*

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"I was watching a christmas carol with patrick stewart. I like him, he is a very good actor and I like the christmas message that was given that a person can change from bad to good if they really want too, do you think that one can change? I believe that one can do it

People can change... but people can also be both good and bad in different situations.

The world is not black and white

Cal

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Sure, if they are supported and helped, it can be hard for people to just change without help though. People are often bad because bad things have happened or been done to them

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By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

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By *lasgow rooferMan
over a year ago

Baillieston

Yes I was a bit of a idiot year's ago ago and missed most of my late teenage years and most of my 20s as a guest in the majesty's residents establishments and haven't been back or more important changed my life style

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. I look at John Lennon as my example.

People make bad choices or decisions or act badly. They learn amd them know how to things better in the future for them and others.

I’ve made terrible decisions that put me in a bad light, but from them I know how to be the best version of myself.

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By *os19Man
over a year ago

Edmonton

"
. Yes I think someone can change from bad to good but like Scrooge they have to see the error of their ways first before change can happen.Yes Patrick Stewart version of a Christmas Carol is a good one but I prefer Ross Kemp version made in 2000 as it’s set in the year 2000 with some of the issues more relevant today than the previous years which are set over 100 years ago.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer the Muppets version.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Yes. Decisions and motivation change direction

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Yes. Decisions and motivation change direction "

Environment has a much bigger impact , put someone somewhere different , where things are done differently or dangers removed , they just change & become like the new environment. Stay in the same place , you are likely to fail no matter how much motivation or will you have

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By *inja 636Man
over a year ago

Grays

great post op theres many different ways to look at this but hell yes someone can change sometimes it can be done by the person solely, sometimes a gentle encouragement can show a person they are worthy inspiring change happy new year too you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is no bad or good, there are varying degrees of external factors which can determine your life choices... Experiences, situations, circumstances along with age and maturity can all be a denominator in that.

Change comes from within, self reflection, critical thinking and self awareness and yes I believe it can be done.

Growth clme

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By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

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By *idnight RamblerMan
over a year ago

Pershore

No, After aged about 8 our personalities are cast in stone.

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By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

Interesting points everyone, my conclusion is that there is always a constant fight bettween the bad and the good in the world, in the end the good will always win cos the world have good as its set point

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By *adtaffladMan
over a year ago

Rhyl

Yes but you always keep that bad side and only use it if essential

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes they can 100% . Things happen in life that change your perception and way of thinking so yes. Plus you have to give people the chance to show and prove it I think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bad kinda implies ignorance or thoughtlessness so yeah.

Evil, nope.

And I have met genuinely evil people.

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By *rhugesMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Generally a leopard never changes their spots

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes. They need the right motivation

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By *aughtiness69Couple
over a year ago

Kinmel bay

Everyone is capable of change. Change isn't the problem as usually people change several times through there life.

Forgiveness is harder on the other hand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there are very few truly bad people in the world. Most others are just people who do some bad things. If one honestly regrets one’s actions it’s u likely to be repeated. Our society seems to have evolved such that we have a 1 strike and your out mentality. How can we ever hope for redemption if society aims to quash us for even the slightest of misguided errors in life?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There’s no such thing as just good and bad. There’s too many caveats and nuances to put people into two boxes.

People will change, particularly as they grow and the people around them changes too.

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By *ilverjagMan
over a year ago

swansea

Of course you can, this is the game of life that we are all playing. The game in which you make your own luck.

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

I believe so.

Jo.Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Usually yes.

But also, some people are just dicks and always will be.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes. They need the right motivation "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few really thoughtful answers on here. Missed this thread before but reading through now all the thoughts I had on reading the OP have v already been expressed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was (much) younger there were some thoroughly unpleasant aspects to my behaviour. But I have become a better person over time.

So yes, it can and does happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes.

Given the right environment and opportunity for change, most people can turn things around.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, it's always in the back of you're mind and one day you will break,

It's apart of who we are

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish

"I think that most people see themselves as the hero in their own story, that they maybe sometimes do bad things, but for what they often see as good reasons, or at least reasons they feel they can justify to themselves. The difficulty with change is firstly accepting that those beliefs are flawed, and being able to ‘see’ a version of themselves that fits far more with the current expectations of society and choosing to work towards it. Whether that change is then truly an inner change, or merely one of training themselves to appear ‘better’, even to the point of fooling themselves, that’s the bit I doubt."

This exactly.

I have a close member of the family who’s done some truly awful things throughout her life and yet still - in her late fifties - sees herself as a beleaguered victim. She causes only hurt and pain wherever she goes - and people never stay in her life for long. I hope one day she’ll seek help and try to change but I very much doubt she will.

In the meantime I keep my distance as she’s extremely toxic.

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