FabSwingers.com forum: It’s a Love bomb

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think there was a thread made by Hippy from weeks ago, but here we are again … discussing this technique used by some…

So the guy I used to see, the man who used to say I was the only one, remember?

Well, he’s gone cold as of lately, and been very withdrawn.

What I’ve noticed tho was his ability to love bomb me.

He’d literally fawn over me, telling me

I’m so pretty.

How crazy beautiful my brown eyes are.

Or how smart I am and how sexy my body is.

Chemistry was kinda off the charts to be honest. But I wonder if I was a bit dickmatised about him and his love showering.

I don’t know guys, it fucking sucks and it’s feeling like tables are turned. Again, I’d like to be specific and say that I wasn’t looking for commitment!! But still.

Why do I always end up with yet another major fuck boy?!!

What do you think of love bombers and people who fawn over you for a bit and then … go hot and cold? Did anyone experience this??

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I don’t mean to be devil’s advocate here but do you think that maybe you’re reticence to ‘commitment’ has brought about the cooling?

Obviously I don’t know the situation in it’s entirety but not every love bomb is manipulation, sometimes it’s actually about being caught up in the moment and it’s the ongoing interactions that cool the ardour.

It does take two to make something work and the chase can only go on so long before there needs to be something reciprocal

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I've had it many times, then they disappear in a cloud of smog, when they're bored with me.

I take the smoke blowing with a pinch of salt and don't let it go to my head.

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By *jorkishMan
over a year ago

Seaforth

"I think there was a thread made by Hippy from weeks ago, but here we are again … discussing this technique used by some…

So the guy I used to see, the man who used to say I was the only one, remember?

Well, he’s gone cold as of lately, and been very withdrawn.

What I’ve noticed tho was his ability to love bomb me.

He’d literally fawn over me, telling me

I’m so pretty.

How crazy beautiful my brown eyes are.

Or how smart I am and how sexy my body is.

Chemistry was kinda off the charts to be honest. But I wonder if I was a bit dickmatised about him and his love showering.

I don’t know guys, it fucking sucks and it’s feeling like tables are turned. Again, I’d like to be specific and say that I wasn’t looking for commitment!! But still.

Why do I always end up with yet another major fuck boy?!!

What do you think of love bombers and people who fawn over you for a bit and then … go hot and cold? Did anyone experience this??

Have you actually met this guy in person? People do this all the time and I bet it's not just men either! I think it's an internet thing, easy to do on here or by text etc. Less easy in person as body language and the eyes tell it all

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

Flattery gets people a long way, if flattery gets you wet, then be aware that people may just be paying a compliment 'great tits' or could be going a bit overboard 'you have the best pair of tits I've seen in my entire life'.

I've never used lines like to pick people up, either never had the guts or seen them as a bit cringey.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don’t mean to be devil’s advocate here but do you think that maybe you’re reticence to ‘commitment’ has brought about the cooling?

It does take two to make something work and the chase can only go on so long before there needs to be something reciprocal "

I’m not saying I feel manipulated by the way! I’m sure he said it because he meant it and not just to sleep with me.

Heck, I’m so chilled that if I like someone, they don’t have to say all these nice things to get me to sleep with them?

Totally unnecessary with me x but I don’t know, hot and cold drives me insane

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think there was a thread made by Hippy from weeks ago, but here we are again … discussing this technique used by some…

So the guy I used to see, the man who used to say I was the only one, remember?

Well, he’s gone cold as of lately, and been very withdrawn.

What I’ve noticed tho was his ability to love bomb me.

He’d literally fawn over me, telling me

I’m so pretty.

How crazy beautiful my brown eyes are.

Or how smart I am and how sexy my body is.

Chemistry was kinda off the charts to be honest. But I wonder if I was a bit dickmatised about him and his love showering.

I don’t know guys, it fucking sucks and it’s feeling like tables are turned. Again, I’d like to be specific and say that I wasn’t looking for commitment!! But still.

Why do I always end up with yet another major fuck boy?!!

What do you think of love bombers and people who fawn over you for a bit and then … go hot and cold? Did anyone experience this??

Yes of course, many times and been seeing each other for months x this was the guy who told me he’s only sleeping with me. Not sure if you read that thread?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Knowing mens mentality to courtship and dating being a guy myself, a lot of the problems women have with getting caught with fuckboys is allowing themselves to be wooed by their charms.

Sure its nice for women to feel noticed and special, sure you ladies need love too and want a man to see you for who you are as a human being, but allowing your carnal desires to be sucked in by attractive boys who whisper sweet nothongs into your ears is your downfall.

Guys know that all it takes to make a woman be putty in their hands is to act like they only have eyes for you. They know that every time youre with them all it takes is to continue wooing you so fall head over heels and let the chemistry do its work.

So every time you see them its difficult to resist and see things for what they really are in your relationship to them.

In my opinion, going off what i know of social behaviours, the ones who are really worth your time dont need to try woo you everytime you see one another to keep you interested, theyll want to spend time with you without the need to charm or imoress or keep telling you that theyre youre everything. The ones worth your time will enjoy every moment with you from the most exciting times down to the normal and mundane, cos at the end of the day, simply being around you is what makes them happy, and that in turn allows you to reciprocate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah unfortunately a few times. I guess the whole love bomb thing just feels so nice as it doesn't happen that often when you think you have the full package and then they go cold turkey on you.

However I look at it that there is bigger and better fun to be had and it does happen.. Hang in there

Definitely there loss

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By *osineCouple
over a year ago

Weston-Super-Mare

Fuck boys only win when we believe we are stronger than we are.

Better to be with someone than to be alone kinda thing.

(just my opinion)

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By *ooo wet tight hornyWoman
over a year ago

lancashire

My mate and myself have a saying about this sort of guy....

'He played me/you like a banjo'

Also the females like this too...

'She played me/you like a banjo'

There will always be people like this, it does give the genuine people a harder time....shame really.

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By *jorkishMan
over a year ago

Seaforth

"I think there was a thread made by Hippy from weeks ago, but here we are again … discussing this technique used by some…

So the guy I used to see, the man who used to say I was the only one, remember?

Well, he’s gone cold as of lately, and been very withdrawn.

What I’ve noticed tho was his ability to love bomb me.

He’d literally fawn over me, telling me

I’m so pretty.

How crazy beautiful my brown eyes are.

Or how smart I am and how sexy my body is.

Chemistry was kinda off the charts to be honest. But I wonder if I was a bit dickmatised about him and his love showering.

I don’t know guys, it fucking sucks and it’s feeling like tables are turned. Again, I’d like to be specific and say that I wasn’t looking for commitment!! But still.

Why do I always end up with yet another major fuck boy?!!

What do you think of love bombers and people who fawn over you for a bit and then … go hot and cold? Did anyone experience this??

Yes of course, many times and been seeing each other for months x this was the guy who told me he’s only sleeping with me. Not sure if you read that thread?"

I may have done, read so many lol. Sounds a bit weird then tbh. If he doesn't feel or want the same now he should tell you and not just leave you in the lurch so to speak. ??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yeah unfortunately a few times. I guess the whole love bomb thing just feels so nice as it doesn't happen that often when you think you have the full package and then they go cold turkey on you.

However I look at it that there is bigger and better fun to be had and it does happen.. Hang in there

Definitely there loss

Exactly. I wasn’t bothered at all about the love bomb at all.

Until chemistry was really intense and yeah, well. I don’t fucking know what is happening anymore…

It’s like they lure you in and once you are heads over heels, it’s like they completed a fucking game or something

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I don’t mean to be devil’s advocate here but do you think that maybe you’re reticence to ‘commitment’ has brought about the cooling?

It does take two to make something work and the chase can only go on so long before there needs to be something reciprocal

I’m not saying I feel manipulated by the way! I’m sure he said it because he meant it and not just to sleep with me.

Heck, I’m so chilled that if I like someone, they don’t have to say all these nice things to get me to sleep with them?

Totally unnecessary with me x but I don’t know, hot and cold drives me insane "

I completely understand what you’re saying.

The problem with fab vs real world is that sometimes people do blow very hot then go cold if it’s not returned how they want and probably lament the fact that the other person didn’t seem that bothered!

Is it a case of love bombing or just very different approaches?

Sometimes (I’m not saying this is the case here) we have to look at ourselves to see if we brought about the changes in the other person.

A real ‘bomber’ will drag you into involvement, then leave you chasing them

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

I’m mega uncomfortable with people who love bomb, even communicating too much and needing attention makes me wobble. I always think that people who over compensate are trying to mask something. I don’t need flattery. I’m way too literal for fluffing..

but is it that he’s showing mixed behaviour or has he withdrawn because you’ve not shown as much interest in any kind of commitment? These things can be complicated..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don’t mean to be devil’s advocate here but do you think that maybe you’re reticence to ‘commitment’ has brought about the cooling?

It does take two to make something work and the chase can only go on so long before there needs to be something reciprocal

I’m not saying I feel manipulated by the way! I’m sure he said it because he meant it and not just to sleep with me.

Heck, I’m so chilled that if I like someone, they don’t have to say all these nice things to get me to sleep with them?

Totally unnecessary with me x but I don’t know, hot and cold drives me insane

I completely understand what you’re saying.

Is it a case of love bombing or just very different approaches?

Sometimes (I’m not saying this is the case here) we have to look at ourselves to see if we brought about the changes in the other person.

A real ‘bomber’ will drag you into involvement, then leave you chasing them"

I feel like I’m the one doing the chasing now

not going to lie …

I’m too proud to chase too much tho! X like even I, have my standards and refuse to have man tell me I’m a “crazy psycho bitch”

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m mega uncomfortable with people who love bomb, even communicating too much and needing attention makes me wobble. I always think that people who over compensate are trying to mask something. I don’t need flattery. I’m way too literal for fluffing..

but is it that he’s showing mixed behaviour or has he withdrawn because you’ve not shown as much interest in any kind of commitment? These things can be complicated..

I don’t know , tho things like that should be discussed and have a convo about it not blow cold

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

Have you ever thought about why you keep ending up with fuck boys? Or at least, what you think is fuck boys?

As the old saying goes, fool me once, fool me twice

How many times have you been fooled?

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

but is it that he’s showing mixed behaviour or has he withdrawn because you’ve not shown as much interest in any kind of commitment? These things can be complicated..

I don’t know , tho things like that should be discussed and have a convo about it not blow cold "

Have you broached the subject with him? It’s defo something that should be talked through if the feelings were strong..

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By *wingsnroundabouts82Couple
over a year ago

Fucksville

but is it that he’s showing mixed behaviour or has he withdrawn because you’ve not shown as much interest in any kind of commitment? These things can be complicated..

Me to a t. I like being Complimented every now and then by "strangers", every day by hubs but when it's too much you begin to question their validity....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Have you ever thought about why you keep ending up with fuck boys? Or at least, what you think is fuck boys?

As the old saying goes, fool me once, fool me twice

How many times have you been fooled? "

I don’t know!!!!!!! I honestly didn’t think he was a fuck boy, I mean he had a bit of “trouble” aura but in a good way.

It’s like if I stumble, I’d definitely land on a fuck boy. GUARANTEED

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"What do you think of love bombers and people who fawn over you for a bit and then … go hot and cold? Did anyone experience this??

That they burn hot and cold and have no idea what they want themselves.

Yes

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

"Have you ever thought about why you keep ending up with fuck boys? Or at least, what you think is fuck boys?

As the old saying goes, fool me once, fool me twice

How many times have you been fooled?

I don’t know!!!!!!! I honestly didn’t think he was a fuck boy, I mean he had a bit of “trouble” aura but in a good way.

It’s like if I stumble, I’d definitely land on a fuck boy. GUARANTEED

Well maybe 2 things

Firstly, why do you keep finding them?

Secondly, are they actually fuck boys? If I called every girl that it didn’t work out with a fuck girl, would that make it true? Do you think that automatically labelling them fuck boys shifts the blame off yourself?

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

People who do the whole you're the best,you're amazing,you are so much nicer/better/sexier etc lines just make me roll my eyes. I don't do love bombing either receiving it or giving it as it's usually just smoke blowing even with people I meet. I met one guy off here who did it to me a lot while we were meeting and I found it clingy and off putting and was one of the reasons I stopped meeting him.

If I pay someone a compliment I mean it and I find the people who say nice things to me sometimes are usually more genuine than ones who say it all the time.

I've seen people fall for the love bomb time and time again and it just ends up leaving them hurt when the person moves on when they find someone new to do it to.

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