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 (I get ID’d at the super market if I wanna get alcohol so I’m very self conscious that I still look young  )
So, yeah, the shame of it all I mean I have been with young guys about his age, but I really don’t want to be the “Cradle snatcher”
Finished off with what I was up to that day etc etc, (I had the feeling he wanted to hang out) and then I was like “gotta go - and maybe see you around?!)
He said his name (Harry, shout out to you) and I said mine.
And thought … soz Harry but I wont be your Meghan
I really didn’t want to get to the swap number situation. As it’d have been kinda awkward but…
My point being, it was kinda nice. And kudos to you, young handsome man for taking charge
Guys, if there’s someone you might fancy, do you take the plunge and try talk to them?
Girls, do you like when you get some nice flirting and convo going on in public places or do you wish to be left alone?
Girls… do you go out of your way to try chat to someone if you fancy them, or are you more the receptive kind of woman, when it comes to real life engagements?
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- I'm joking, I didn't throw paint over his car. But someone did. I didn't have my glasses on and wondered why someone was washing their car at 11pm so thought I best put my eyes in and check. Luckily it was still dripping so he managed to wash it off.
I'm happy for people to talk to me out and about but the RBF probably puts them off. I don't like talking to anyone when out hiking/walking though, I like to just be left alone so I put my earphones in even if I haven't got music on. I guess my wedding ring etc puts people off too. | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me " I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. Like he was, so I was receptive. Either way he was way too young for me.  but I never thought “pervert” | |||
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 next time give a guy a chance!
K | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. Like he was, so I was receptive. Either way he was way too young for me. but I never thought “pervert”"If only everyone was as forgiving and understand as you A lot of women don’t feel that way about being approached. Especially if it’s by a guy then deem unattractive. It’s just not worth the risk for me. | |||
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"So, This happened on Wednesday, I was sitting at my local cafe and this tall, dark haired, slim guy comes in, orders his coffee and sits to a table close to me. I checked him out soon as he walked in as I thought he was quite handsome. (He put his mask on when he ordered his coffee, but I managed to get an idea of his face anyway) There was that sort of gaze game , u know what I’m talking about right? The one where he looks at you, and probably thinks “oooh she’s nice” and then you look them back kinda with that fawny eyes and think “oooh he’s nice” U know what I mean, right? Anyway, I was listening to my music and drinking away, while he’s there sitting and …fretting a bit… and 5 mins later, he turned to me and starts talking. Asking me if I’m local, and he tells me that he’s not, but he’d like to know what’s around to do. So I give him some recommendations and we start chatting. I was kind of on edge at first, as when it happens organically it can kinda be … either really or either real awkssss (I’ve had guys ask me to go round theirs literally After 10 mins talking. The cheek!) All seemed well, until I asked him what he was doing and he mentions UNI… yes. Fucking UNI. I mean he did look young but I didn’t think he was that young! I didn’t disclose the fact that I’m 30 btw … skipped (I get ID’d at the super market if I wanna get alcohol so I’m very self conscious that I still look young )
So, yeah, the shame of it all I mean I have been with young guys about his age, but I really don’t want to be the “Cradle snatcher”
Finished off with what I was up to that day etc etc, (I had the feeling he wanted to hang out) and then I was like “gotta go - and maybe see you around?!)
He said his name (Harry, shout out to you) and I said mine.
And thought … soz Harry but I wont be your Meghan
I really didn’t want to get to the swap number situation. As it’d have been kinda awkward but…
My point being, it was kinda nice. And kudos to you, young handsome man for taking charge
Guys, if there’s someone you might fancy, do you take the plunge and try talk to them?
Girls, do you like when you get some nice flirting and convo going on in public places or do you wish to be left alone?
Girls… do you go out of your way to try chat to someone if you fancy them, or are you more the receptive kind of woman, when it comes to real life engagements?
"Yesterday I gave a detailed post as to why I don't approach women in public at all, it's not just the climate but being a black guy who hits the gym and has dreadlocs, white people (especially young white women see me as a threat) so no, it doesn't matter to me how gorgeous you are, I never approach women in public after a very unfortunate affair I had when guess what I didn't even talk to anyone or showed interest but a group of young white women said they feel threatened by me and wanted me removed from a club (2 months into moving to the UK, that was about 2 years ago). So for me it's not about not wanting to take charge, it's about not wanting to be charged. However I have no problem meeting women in public as I always get compliments and women introduce themselves to me all the time, so I don't ever feel pressured to approach a woman i think looks beautiful. | |||
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"Lorenzo is over 30 and only started uni this year. It's never too late for a career change and maybe Harry wasn't as young as you thought either next time give a guy a chance!
K"Yeah I know, maybe he wasn’t but when he said Uni then it sort of clicked as he did look young-ish. Definitely not in his 30s. In retrospective, I did maybe panic over it a little. When maybe I shouldn’t have. Who called me a Cradle Snatcher a few days ago??!! Someone on here did, jokingly …Of course | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. Like he was, so I was receptive. Either way he was way too young for me. but I never thought “pervert”
If only everyone was as forgiving and understand as you
A lot of women don’t feel that way about being approached. Especially if it’s by a guy then deem unattractive. It’s just not worth the risk for me. "There are so many memes about this, if a woman finds you attractive and you approach her cool, if she doesn't it's harassment, definitely not worth the risk as a guy when there are dating apps and sites like this to meet women, where the risk of being reported for harassment etc is low once you're being a polite gentleman. I have other reasons as well, which is because of my race, but I definitely agree with you on this one. | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. Like he was, so I was receptive. Either way he was way too young for me. but I never thought “pervert”
If only everyone was as forgiving and understand as you
A lot of women don’t feel that way about being approached. Especially if it’s by a guy then deem unattractive. It’s just not worth the risk for me. "To be honest there have been a few that I didn’t like at all, who did try and were coming off as … very seedy. I kinda want to change direction if I see him at the local super market or whatever. I’d never say anything rude but I mean, yeah. Just politely dismissive I don’t think you are a bad looking dude, so I wouldn’t worry if you were feeling a bit cheeky
It is a shame that some feel this way as I think when it happens in real life, at a cafe or book store or whatever. It is kinda cute and makes you feel good | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. Like he was, so I was receptive. Either way he was way too young for me. but I never thought “pervert”
If only everyone was as forgiving and understand as you
A lot of women don’t feel that way about being approached. Especially if it’s by a guy then deem unattractive. It’s just not worth the risk for me.
To be honest there have been a few that I didn’t like at all, who did try and were coming off as … very seedy.
I kinda want to change direction if I see him at the local super market or whatever. I’d never say anything rude but I mean, yeah. Just politely dismissive
I don’t think you are a bad looking dude, so I wouldn’t worry if you were feeling a bit cheeky
It is a shame that some feel this way as I think when it happens in real life, at a cafe or book store or whatever. It is kinda cute and makes you feel good "I actually fully agree, I hate that it’s got to this point. What’s more romantic then running into your life partner at a coffee shop? But the truth is we are at a point now where the general rule is “leave women alone”. Which is fine. I’ll leave them alone. It just sucks that the magic of randomly bumping into someone you like is gone. And I know some women probably feel the same way. But sadly, a few creepy men and a few overly sensitive women have ruined it for the majority | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. Like he was, so I was receptive. Either way he was way too young for me. but I never thought “pervert”
If only everyone was as forgiving and understand as you
A lot of women don’t feel that way about being approached. Especially if it’s by a guy then deem unattractive. It’s just not worth the risk for me.
To be honest there have been a few that I didn’t like at all, who did try and were coming off as … very seedy.
I kinda want to change direction if I see him at the local super market or whatever. I’d never say anything rude but I mean, yeah. Just politely dismissive
I don’t think you are a bad looking dude, so I wouldn’t worry if you were feeling a bit cheeky
It is a shame that some feel this way as I think when it happens in real life, at a cafe or book store or whatever. It is kinda cute and makes you feel good
I actually fully agree, I hate that it’s got to this point. What’s more romantic then running into your life partner at a coffee shop?
But the truth is we are at a point now where the general rule is “leave women alone”.
Which is fine. I’ll leave them alone. It just sucks that the magic of randomly bumping into someone you like is gone. And I know some women probably feel the same way.
But sadly, a few creepy men and a few overly sensitive women have ruined it for the majority "As a society we really have moved more towards online interaction first , then meet after if everything falls into place It’s like a comfort blanket But it kinda sucks and that was a reminder that it’s nice when it happens more organically Total respect for the guy | |||
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"A bloke was chatting me up in a shop last week. 20 minutes later we were shagging. "Haha!!! X good on u, hope it was a hot shag | |||
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"So, This happened on Wednesday, I was sitting at my local cafe and this tall, dark haired, slim guy comes in, orders his coffee and sits to a table close to me. I checked him out soon as he walked in as I thought he was quite handsome. (He put his mask on when he ordered his coffee, but I managed to get an idea of his face anyway) There was that sort of gaze game , u know what I’m talking about right? The one where he looks at you, and probably thinks “oooh she’s nice” and then you look them back kinda with that fawny eyes and think “oooh he’s nice” U know what I mean, right? Anyway, I was listening to my music and drinking away, while he’s there sitting and …fretting a bit… and 5 mins later, he turned to me and starts talking. Asking me if I’m local, and he tells me that he’s not, but he’d like to know what’s around to do. So I give him some recommendations and we start chatting. I was kind of on edge at first, as when it happens organically it can kinda be … either really or either real awkssss (I’ve had guys ask me to go round theirs literally After 10 mins talking. The cheek!) All seemed well, until I asked him what he was doing and he mentions UNI… yes. Fucking UNI. I mean he did look young but I didn’t think he was that young! I didn’t disclose the fact that I’m 30 btw … skipped (I get ID’d at the super market if I wanna get alcohol so I’m very self conscious that I still look young )
So, yeah, the shame of it all I mean I have been with young guys about his age, but I really don’t want to be the “Cradle snatcher”
Finished off with what I was up to that day etc etc, (I had the feeling he wanted to hang out) and then I was like “gotta go - and maybe see you around?!)
He said his name (Harry, shout out to you) and I said mine.
And thought … soz Harry but I wont be your Meghan
I really didn’t want to get to the swap number situation. As it’d have been kinda awkward but…
My point being, it was kinda nice. And kudos to you, young handsome man for taking charge
Guys, if there’s someone you might fancy, do you take the plunge and try talk to them?
Girls, do you like when you get some nice flirting and convo going on in public places or do you wish to be left alone?
Girls… do you go out of your way to try chat to someone if you fancy them, or are you more the receptive kind of woman, when it comes to real life engagements?
Yesterday I gave a detailed post as to why I don't approach women in public at all, it's not just the climate but being a black guy who hits the gym and has dreadlocs, white people (especially young white women see me as a threat) so no, it doesn't matter to me how gorgeous you are, I never approach women in public after a very unfortunate affair I had when guess what I didn't even talk to anyone or showed interest but a group of young white women said they feel threatened by me and wanted me removed from a club (2 months into moving to the UK, that was about 2 years ago). So for me it's not about not wanting to take charge, it's about not wanting to be charged.
However I have no problem meeting women in public as I always get compliments and women introduce themselves to me all the time, so I don't ever feel pressured to approach a woman i think looks beautiful. "I’m so sorry that happened to you that some women even got “annoyed” by your presence. So freaking weird how some people would go a long way to get you removed from the club, especially as you were just doing your own thing. I see why you’d rather avoid any sort of engaging situation, unless ladies start it . | |||
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"So, This happened on Wednesday, I was sitting at my local cafe and this tall, dark haired, slim guy comes in, orders his coffee and sits to a table close to me. I checked him out soon as he walked in as I thought he was quite handsome. (He put his mask on when he ordered his coffee, but I managed to get an idea of his face anyway) There was that sort of gaze game , u know what I’m talking about right? The one where he looks at you, and probably thinks “oooh she’s nice” and then you look them back kinda with that fawny eyes and think “oooh he’s nice” U know what I mean, right? Anyway, I was listening to my music and drinking away, while he’s there sitting and …fretting a bit… and 5 mins later, he turned to me and starts talking. Asking me if I’m local, and he tells me that he’s not, but he’d like to know what’s around to do. So I give him some recommendations and we start chatting. I was kind of on edge at first, as when it happens organically it can kinda be … either really or either real awkssss (I’ve had guys ask me to go round theirs literally After 10 mins talking. The cheek!) All seemed well, until I asked him what he was doing and he mentions UNI… yes. Fucking UNI. I mean he did look young but I didn’t think he was that young! I didn’t disclose the fact that I’m 30 btw … skipped (I get ID’d at the super market if I wanna get alcohol so I’m very self conscious that I still look young )
So, yeah, the shame of it all I mean I have been with young guys about his age, but I really don’t want to be the “Cradle snatcher”
Finished off with what I was up to that day etc etc, (I had the feeling he wanted to hang out) and then I was like “gotta go - and maybe see you around?!)
He said his name (Harry, shout out to you) and I said mine.
And thought … soz Harry but I wont be your Meghan
I really didn’t want to get to the swap number situation. As it’d have been kinda awkward but…
My point being, it was kinda nice. And kudos to you, young handsome man for taking charge
Guys, if there’s someone you might fancy, do you take the plunge and try talk to them?
Girls, do you like when you get some nice flirting and convo going on in public places or do you wish to be left alone?
Girls… do you go out of your way to try chat to someone if you fancy them, or are you more the receptive kind of woman, when it comes to real life engagements?
"I talk to people full stop. Do I go out of my way to chat people up? No especially but when you learn to read signs and they are all positive then when not start a conversation. If you are paying attention you will soon know if they aren’t interested. Body language is very readable. I think I find it easier because even when I was single I know that not every conversation had to have an outcome. It could just be a good, interesting conversation and that’s it. Not approaching the other people for fear of being labelled means that when you do your own demeanour and body language will show that you are uncomfortable with it and give of the vibe you were so scared about in the first place. If someone is repeated looking at you and smiling then just say hi and ask a simple question like this guy did. Kudos to him | |||
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"So, This happened on Wednesday, I was sitting at my local cafe and this tall, dark haired, slim guy comes in, orders his coffee and sits to a table close to me. I checked him out soon as he walked in as I thought he was quite handsome. (He put his mask on when he ordered his coffee, but I managed to get an idea of his face anyway) There was that sort of gaze game , u know what I’m talking about right? The one where he looks at you, and probably thinks “oooh she’s nice” and then you look them back kinda with that fawny eyes and think “oooh he’s nice” U know what I mean, right? Anyway, I was listening to my music and drinking away, while he’s there sitting and …fretting a bit… and 5 mins later, he turned to me and starts talking. Asking me if I’m local, and he tells me that he’s not, but he’d like to know what’s around to do. So I give him some recommendations and we start chatting. I was kind of on edge at first, as when it happens organically it can kinda be … either really or either real awkssss (I’ve had guys ask me to go round theirs literally After 10 mins talking. The cheek!) All seemed well, until I asked him what he was doing and he mentions UNI… yes. Fucking UNI. I mean he did look young but I didn’t think he was that young! I didn’t disclose the fact that I’m 30 btw … skipped (I get ID’d at the super market if I wanna get alcohol so I’m very self conscious that I still look young )
So, yeah, the shame of it all I mean I have been with young guys about his age, but I really don’t want to be the “Cradle snatcher”
Finished off with what I was up to that day etc etc, (I had the feeling he wanted to hang out) and then I was like “gotta go - and maybe see you around?!)
He said his name (Harry, shout out to you) and I said mine.
And thought … soz Harry but I wont be your Meghan
I really didn’t want to get to the swap number situation. As it’d have been kinda awkward but…
My point being, it was kinda nice. And kudos to you, young handsome man for taking charge
Guys, if there’s someone you might fancy, do you take the plunge and try talk to them?
Girls, do you like when you get some nice flirting and convo going on in public places or do you wish to be left alone?
Girls… do you go out of your way to try chat to someone if you fancy them, or are you more the receptive kind of woman, when it comes to real life engagements?
Yesterday I gave a detailed post as to why I don't approach women in public at all, it's not just the climate but being a black guy who hits the gym and has dreadlocs, white people (especially young white women see me as a threat) so no, it doesn't matter to me how gorgeous you are, I never approach women in public after a very unfortunate affair I had when guess what I didn't even talk to anyone or showed interest but a group of young white women said they feel threatened by me and wanted me removed from a club (2 months into moving to the UK, that was about 2 years ago). So for me it's not about not wanting to take charge, it's about not wanting to be charged.
However I have no problem meeting women in public as I always get compliments and women introduce themselves to me all the time, so I don't ever feel pressured to approach a woman i think looks beautiful.
I’m so sorry that happened to you that some women even got “annoyed” by your presence. So freaking weird how some people would go a long way to get you removed from the club, especially as you were just doing your own thing.
I see why you’d rather avoid any sort of engaging situation, unless ladies start it .
"yup it was a horrible and jarring experience, not the best way to be welcomed into a foreign country (especially one that you hoped to make your home) the bouncer was actually on my side and was observing and stated that the girls were on nonsense. I didn't go to the club until almost 2 years after and the bouncer who is still there now lets me in for free. So yea as a black guy I have to deal with a lot of crap when I go out, so I'm very cautious with how I interact with women (especially white women) Thansk for understanding xx | |||
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"So, This happened on Wednesday, I was sitting at my local cafe and this tall, dark haired, slim guy comes in, orders his coffee and sits to a table close to me. I checked him out soon as he walked in as I thought he was quite handsome. (He put his mask on when he ordered his coffee, but I managed to get an idea of his face anyway) There was that sort of gaze game , u know what I’m talking about right? The one where he looks at you, and probably thinks “oooh she’s nice” and then you look them back kinda with that fawny eyes and think “oooh he’s nice” U know what I mean, right? Anyway, I was listening to my music and drinking away, while he’s there sitting and …fretting a bit… and 5 mins later, he turned to me and starts talking. Asking me if I’m local, and he tells me that he’s not, but he’d like to know what’s around to do. So I give him some recommendations and we start chatting. I was kind of on edge at first, as when it happens organically it can kinda be … either really or either real awkssss (I’ve had guys ask me to go round theirs literally After 10 mins talking. The cheek!) All seemed well, until I asked him what he was doing and he mentions UNI… yes. Fucking UNI. I mean he did look young but I didn’t think he was that young! I didn’t disclose the fact that I’m 30 btw … skipped (I get ID’d at the super market if I wanna get alcohol so I’m very self conscious that I still look young )
So, yeah, the shame of it all I mean I have been with young guys about his age, but I really don’t want to be the “Cradle snatcher”
Finished off with what I was up to that day etc etc, (I had the feeling he wanted to hang out) and then I was like “gotta go - and maybe see you around?!)
He said his name (Harry, shout out to you) and I said mine.
And thought … soz Harry but I wont be your Meghan
I really didn’t want to get to the swap number situation. As it’d have been kinda awkward but…
My point being, it was kinda nice. And kudos to you, young handsome man for taking charge
Guys, if there’s someone you might fancy, do you take the plunge and try talk to them?
Girls, do you like when you get some nice flirting and convo going on in public places or do you wish to be left alone?
Girls… do you go out of your way to try chat to someone if you fancy them, or are you more the receptive kind of woman, when it comes to real life engagements?
"I would never approach a woman I don't know, I don't even message women here, let alone "make the first move" in public. And I will most likely open a thread at some point explaining more in depth these choises. However, regardless if you praise him here, it might be the case that for him you still rejected him ( in a form or another- I'm just guessing)...and you might say, it's not a big deal, he's just not old enough,and you might say it shouldn't be a big deal for him either, which is fair... but every now and then rejection can be quite hard to deal with. | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me " A polite conversation in a coffee shop is a world away from random creepy comments when out and about. I initiate conversation and if someone starts one with me, I'll either join in or make it clear I'm not interested. It only becomes worrisome if they try to carry on or become rude. | |||
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Not sure if I have the male version of resting bitch face | |||
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"Hey he could’ve been a mature student? I’m 30 and at uni. X " Me too, and I work full time as well. | |||
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"So, This happened on Wednesday, I was sitting at my local cafe and this tall, dark haired, slim guy comes in, orders his coffee and sits to a table close to me. I checked him out soon as he walked in as I thought he was quite handsome. (He put his mask on when he ordered his coffee, but I managed to get an idea of his face anyway) There was that sort of gaze game , u know what I’m talking about right? The one where he looks at you, and probably thinks “oooh she’s nice” and then you look them back kinda with that fawny eyes and think “oooh he’s nice” U know what I mean, right? Anyway, I was listening to my music and drinking away, while he’s there sitting and …fretting a bit… and 5 mins later, he turned to me and starts talking. Asking me if I’m local, and he tells me that he’s not, but he’d like to know what’s around to do. So I give him some recommendations and we start chatting. I was kind of on edge at first, as when it happens organically it can kinda be … either really or either real awkssss (I’ve had guys ask me to go round theirs literally After 10 mins talking. The cheek!) All seemed well, until I asked him what he was doing and he mentions UNI… yes. Fucking UNI. I mean he did look young but I didn’t think he was that young! I didn’t disclose the fact that I’m 30 btw … skipped (I get ID’d at the super market if I wanna get alcohol so I’m very self conscious that I still look young )
So, yeah, the shame of it all I mean I have been with young guys about his age, but I really don’t want to be the “Cradle snatcher”
Finished off with what I was up to that day etc etc, (I had the feeling he wanted to hang out) and then I was like “gotta go - and maybe see you around?!)
He said his name (Harry, shout out to you) and I said mine.
And thought … soz Harry but I wont be your Meghan
I really didn’t want to get to the swap number situation. As it’d have been kinda awkward but…
My point being, it was kinda nice. And kudos to you, young handsome man for taking charge
Guys, if there’s someone you might fancy, do you take the plunge and try talk to them?
Girls, do you like when you get some nice flirting and convo going on in public places or do you wish to be left alone?
Girls… do you go out of your way to try chat to someone if you fancy them, or are you more the receptive kind of woman, when it comes to real life engagements?
I talk to people full stop. Do I go out of my way to chat people up? No especially but when you learn to read signs and they are all positive then when not start a conversation. If you are paying attention you will soon know if they aren’t interested. Body language is very readable.
I think I find it easier because even when I was single I know that not every conversation had to have an outcome. It could just be a good, interesting conversation and that’s it.
Not approaching the other people for fear of being labelled means that when you do your own demeanour and body language will show that you are uncomfortable with it and give of the vibe you were so scared about in the first place.
If someone is repeated looking at you and smiling then just say hi and ask a simple question like this guy did. Kudos to him "I didn’t straight reject him . Like I was attracted to him but just age was a thing that didn’t make me want to take things further. Obviously I didn’t comment on his age and was polite even after the “yikes” moment But in all fairness he could have had the “yikes” moment if I went into dept about myself so… We had a good convo tho and some flirting , I’m sure he wasn’t heart broken that we didn’t exchange numbers or that we hung out  | |||
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"Hey he could’ve been a mature student? I’m 30 and at uni. X " He didn’t look 30!! I think he might have been a standard student so maybe 19-20 x | |||
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"Hey he could’ve been a mature student? I’m 30 and at uni. X " True, I've just finished my Master's and I'm 36 lol | |||
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"Hey he could’ve been a mature student? I’m 30 and at uni. X He didn’t look 30!! I think he might have been a standard student so maybe 19-20 x " cool cool | |||
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I will be helpful if asked for directions etc and chat to old dears in the supermarket queue but anyone trying to flirt, my headphones go in or my phone rings all of a sudden | |||
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"I'm a miserable cow, I'd rather be left alone
I will be helpful if asked for directions etc and chat to old dears in the supermarket queue but anyone trying to flirt, my headphones go in or my phone rings all of a sudden "I do with people handing out things wanting sell you thing on high street pretend to be on the phone lol | |||
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"Hi Kylie. When I was several years younger, slimmer and prettier I met a fab fem friend for a coffee at my local Wetherspoons. From memory I’d decided to ‘make an effort’. When she’d gone (she had a social with a chap) I stayed on the sofa we’d sat on to catch up on e-mails and finish my coffee. A bald chap approached me and asked if I fancied a drink sometime. My normal response when the attraction isn’t reciprocated is to thank them for the offer but tell them I’m attached. On this occasion though I was a little nonplused as it was totally unexpected - so I just said ‘Thanks, but no!’ He walked away gutted and I felt really bad for him - still do! Fortunately I’m an ugly old hag these days so rarely get chatted up outside clubs. X" I beg to differ beautiful | |||
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"Hey he could’ve been a mature student? I’m 30 and at uni. X He didn’t look 30!! I think he might have been a standard student so maybe 19-20 x " What did you expect of him, if he looked that age!!! | |||
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"I'm a miserable cow, I'd rather be left alone
I will be helpful if asked for directions etc and chat to old dears in the supermarket queue but anyone trying to flirt, my headphones go in or my phone rings all of a sudden I do with people handing out things wanting sell you thing on high street pretend to be on the phone lol "I just ignore them | |||
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"I'm a miserable cow, I'd rather be left alone
I will be helpful if asked for directions etc and chat to old dears in the supermarket queue but anyone trying to flirt, my headphones go in or my phone rings all of a sudden I do with people handing out things wanting sell you thing on high street pretend to be on the phone lol
I just ignore them " | |||
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"I do. If I like someone, I chat. In a friendly way because I'm a friendly guy. I can take signals, and read them well. I wouldn't chat to someone who I haven't got a 'vibe' from, but fucking hell, if I've been looking at someone and they have been doing the same I aren't going to not talk to them for fear of 'the current climate' or them being offended by a compliment. I won't just go over there and compliment anyway. What the fucking hell is the world coming to when you are umming and arring about taking to a stranger " Good on you! X I think we need more situations like that. Of course, in the right setting with the right situation.
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"Hey he could’ve been a mature student? I’m 30 and at uni. X He didn’t look 30!! I think he might have been a standard student so maybe 19-20 x What did you expect of him, if he looked that age!!! " I wasn’t sure when he walked in, because how tall he was, etc I’d have said to begin with 25. But when he mentioned UNI then it made more sense and was like. Oh actually he might be younger. But who knows, maybe he was 25-26 and I just cut the head because in my head I heard uni and immediately thought he must be very young then. I didn’t ask for his actual age because A) I didn’t wanna say I’m 30 | |||
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"Hi Kylie. When I was several years younger, slimmer and prettier I met a fab fem friend for a coffee at my local Wetherspoons. From memory I’d decided to ‘make an effort’. When she’d gone (she had a social with a chap) I stayed on the sofa we’d sat on to catch up on e-mails and finish my coffee. A bald chap approached me and asked if I fancied a drink sometime. My normal response when the attraction isn’t reciprocated is to thank them for the offer but tell them I’m attached. On this occasion though I was a little nonplused as it was totally unexpected - so I just said ‘Thanks, but no!’ He walked away gutted and I felt really bad for him - still do! Fortunately I’m an ugly old hag these days so rarely get chatted up outside clubs. X" Haha. Brutal!! Was he not your type, physically? Like that guy was very nice, beautiful smile and attractive but yeah, I’m dreading to think about the age! I did see a guy who is 22 … months ago, and … well, the “I’d have said u were my age” when the age cards were revealed… I’m still kinda getting over it. I mean, I’m cool with that but also.. I’m not ready to be the cougar just yet
Sex is okay but I do generally prefer guys in their 30s  | |||
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"Did you ask his age he could have been a mature student like 25" I didn’t! I was too scared to admit I’m 30
Old haggg Kylie | |||
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"Did you ask his age he could have been a mature student like 25 I didn’t! I was too scared to admit I’m 30
Old haggg Kylie "Not at all silly sausage | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way " What’s ‘today’s climate’? One where women have a deserved expectation to be treated with respect as a matter of course? | |||
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"I’m extremely shy so I tend to be a bit “rabbit in headlights” if a random guy chats to me, about anything never mind with a view to chatting me up! I think it would depend who I was with. I was once chatted up in front of my mum and I just wanted the ground to swallow me up. That said, if I’ve had a drink i liven up a bit and I will flirt (badly), but at least the poor fella would know what was what. It’s all very complicated these days isn’t it. Of it feels it. " I think it’s actually less complicated these days. Guys are in general being told to leave women, don’t even look at them on the street. Cross the road if you can. Women very rarely approach anyways And people are more buried in their phones than ever It’s removed almost all the complications because no one speaks to anyone now. And that’s a shame. Because I think a lot of women really like the idea of being swept off their feet while there out and about. And I feel a lot of guts would really like to do that sweeping. But I just don’t think that’s coming back. | |||
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"I’m extremely shy so I tend to be a bit “rabbit in headlights” if a random guy chats to me, about anything never mind with a view to chatting me up! I think it would depend who I was with. I was once chatted up in front of my mum and I just wanted the ground to swallow me up. That said, if I’ve had a drink i liven up a bit and I will flirt (badly), but at least the poor fella would know what was what. It’s all very complicated these days isn’t it. Of it feels it. I think it’s actually less complicated these days. Guys are in general being told to leave women, don’t even look at them on the street. Cross the road if you can. Women very rarely approach anyways And people are more buried in their phones than ever It’s removed almost all the complications because no one speaks to anyone now. And that’s a shame. Because I think a lot of women really like the idea of being swept off their feet while there out and about. And I feel a lot of guts would really like to do that sweeping. But I just don’t think that’s coming back." There’s just no romance in romancing these days  | |||
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"….I’d hate to think that I’d ever made anyone comfortable by engaging them in conversation." Obviously, that was meant to say UNCOMFORTABLE not comfortable! | |||
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"There have been times when I've found it invasive and there are times when it has been welcome. It depends on the vibe, my mood, what I'm doing and his approach/vibe. Mostly, on a good day I'll chat to literally anyone though. I love a flirty chit chat. If you decide to approach a stranger and chat, it's just good to have the ablility to quickly read their response. If it doesn't flow or the persons body language is closed..back off. It's not hard to spot when you're willing to be perceptive to the person you're aporoaching. I really fully understand why people choose not to bother. And why some are just simply closed to being approached. R*pe and abuse culture and misogyny breeds mistrust and effects all without exception. " Exactly!! I think it’s all about good body language and see how the conversation is, if it’s awkward and dismissive , hopefully they get it. I’ve been dismissive with some, and I think they got it. But yeah, with this guy, he clearly read my eyes and decided to start a conversation . | |||
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"I’m extremely shy so I tend to be a bit “rabbit in headlights” if a random guy chats to me, about anything never mind with a view to chatting me up! I think it would depend who I was with. I was once chatted up in front of my mum and I just wanted the ground to swallow me up. That said, if I’ve had a drink i liven up a bit and I will flirt (badly), but at least the poor fella would know what was what. It’s all very complicated these days isn’t it. Of it feels it. I think it’s actually less complicated these days. Guys are in general being told to leave women, don’t even look at them on the street. Cross the road if you can. Women very rarely approach anyways And people are more buried in their phones than ever It’s removed almost all the complications because no one speaks to anyone now. And that’s a shame. Because I think a lot of women really like the idea of being swept off their feet while there out and about. And I feel a lot of guts would really like to do that sweeping. But I just don’t think that’s coming back." Kinda agree, it really reminded me that if it isn’t seedy, then it can be VERY enjoyable. Even if you then discover that you might not be right for each other. (Unlike when you are online where you look on their profile and know already all the basic infos And then decide whether to engage or not) It did put me in a good mood, and told my bestie straight away and put a smile on my face | |||
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"I’m sceptical when people talk to me in public. Not because I’m mistrusting, I just misinterpret things too much. I also had a coffee shop encounter. I was pretending to read my book thinking I was looking mysterious and alluring and when the handsome man on the table right behind me turned around to say something to me I turned around and tried to give him my best come to bed eyes (looking like a psychopath) and he asked me to get my chair off his coat. " | |||
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"Let me rephrase, I don’t feel old, but knowing I’m 30 and a guy might be like in his early 20s, makes me feel kinda old. " He might be into old ladies.
Oops typo. Sexy cougars | |||
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"This is something I can relate to for sure! In my younger days, I'm proud to say I oozed confidence and had no issues at all approaching a lady in a public setting. Sometimes it was just for casual chat about anything, sometimes it was a fellow dog walker and we just got talking or even a bit of flirting on a night out. That was the old me though... Nowadays in my experience women are quite guarded (and with good reason, no issues with that) but it does change your perception about if/how to approach. So much so that I've lost that confidence I used to have, as I just don't do it enough any more, if at all. It's a shame, but it is what it is "Probably a bit Jaded, there.. Steel? Or is it Pat taking over, again?
I think the guy was brave, probably because of his young age, and maybe wasn’t as aware, just like you described it
He did radiate an amazing confidence and that kind thrown me back a little. I’m so praising that Harry x | |||
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"I do. If I like someone, I chat. In a friendly way because I'm a friendly guy. I can take signals, and read them well. I wouldn't chat to someone who I haven't got a 'vibe' from, but fucking hell, if I've been looking at someone and they have been doing the same I aren't going to not talk to them for fear of 'the current climate' or them being offended by a compliment. I won't just go over there and compliment anyway. What the fucking hell is the world coming to when you are umming and arring about taking to a stranger " This a 1000% | |||
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"Let me rephrase, I don’t feel old, but knowing I’m 30 and a guy might be like in his early 20s, makes me feel kinda old. He might be into old ladies.
Oops typo. Sexy cougars "Haha I’m secretly ready to be one
J.Lo is my inspo | |||
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"This is something I can relate to for sure! In my younger days, I'm proud to say I oozed confidence and had no issues at all approaching a lady in a public setting. Sometimes it was just for casual chat about anything, sometimes it was a fellow dog walker and we just got talking or even a bit of flirting on a night out. That was the old me though... Nowadays in my experience women are quite guarded (and with good reason, no issues with that) but it does change your perception about if/how to approach. So much so that I've lost that confidence I used to have, as I just don't do it enough any more, if at all. It's a shame, but it is what it is "Can I have your silver ring The one on your finger x | |||
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"This is something I can relate to for sure! In my younger days, I'm proud to say I oozed confidence and had no issues at all approaching a lady in a public setting. Sometimes it was just for casual chat about anything, sometimes it was a fellow dog walker and we just got talking or even a bit of flirting on a night out. That was the old me though... Nowadays in my experience women are quite guarded (and with good reason, no issues with that) but it does change your perception about if/how to approach. So much so that I've lost that confidence I used to have, as I just don't do it enough any more, if at all. It's a shame, but it is what it is
Can I have your silver ring
The one on your finger x"Random... But sure! Wish it was a prescious metal but I'm afraid it's just stainless steel, made by yours truly. Worth absolutely nothing | |||
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"This is something I can relate to for sure! In my younger days, I'm proud to say I oozed confidence and had no issues at all approaching a lady in a public setting. Sometimes it was just for casual chat about anything, sometimes it was a fellow dog walker and we just got talking or even a bit of flirting on a night out. That was the old me though... Nowadays in my experience women are quite guarded (and with good reason, no issues with that) but it does change your perception about if/how to approach. So much so that I've lost that confidence I used to have, as I just don't do it enough any more, if at all. It's a shame, but it is what it is
Can I have your silver ring
The one on your finger x
Random...
But sure! Wish it was a prescious metal but I'm afraid it's just stainless steel, made by yours truly. Worth absolutely nothing "All the more reason I want it | |||
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"This is something I can relate to for sure! In my younger days, I'm proud to say I oozed confidence and had no issues at all approaching a lady in a public setting. Sometimes it was just for casual chat about anything, sometimes it was a fellow dog walker and we just got talking or even a bit of flirting on a night out. That was the old me though... Nowadays in my experience women are quite guarded (and with good reason, no issues with that) but it does change your perception about if/how to approach. So much so that I've lost that confidence I used to have, as I just don't do it enough any more, if at all. It's a shame, but it is what it is
Probably a bit Jaded, there.. Steel?
Or is it Pat taking over, again?
I think the guy was brave, probably because of his young age, and maybe wasn’t as aware, just like you described it
He did radiate an amazing confidence and that kind thrown me back a little. I’m so praising that Harry x "It's never me. Always blame Patricia
Not knocking him at all, fair play to the man! | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me " Was just thinking this. No chance. | |||
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" I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. " And that therein is the rub. | |||
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"In today’s climate? No way Sounds like a real easy way to be labelled a creep/pervert/predator We’ve had multiple threads of women getting annoyed at passing compliments. I think this kinda applies too. It’s a no from me I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. Like he was, so I was receptive. Either way he was way too young for me. but I never thought “pervert”
If only everyone was as forgiving and understand as you
A lot of women don’t feel that way about being approached. Especially if it’s by a guy then deem unattractive. It’s just not worth the risk for me.
To be honest there have been a few that I didn’t like at all, who did try and were coming off as … very seedy.
I kinda want to change direction if I see him at the local super market or whatever. I’d never say anything rude but I mean, yeah. Just politely dismissive
I don’t think you are a bad looking dude, so I wouldn’t worry if you were feeling a bit cheeky
It is a shame that some feel this way as I think when it happens in real life, at a cafe or book store or whatever. It is kinda cute and makes you feel good
I actually fully agree, I hate that it’s got to this point. What’s more romantic then running into your life partner at a coffee shop?
But the truth is we are at a point now where the general rule is “leave women alone”.
Which is fine. I’ll leave them alone. It just sucks that the magic of randomly bumping into someone you like is gone. And I know some women probably feel the same way.
But sadly, a few creepy men and a few overly sensitive women have ruined it for the majority "I agree. It’s a sad world that it’s come to this. I’d hate to be a man in this day and age I really would. | |||
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"This is something I can relate to for sure! In my younger days, I'm proud to say I oozed confidence and had no issues at all approaching a lady in a public setting. Sometimes it was just for casual chat about anything, sometimes it was a fellow dog walker and we just got talking or even a bit of flirting on a night out. That was the old me though... Nowadays in my experience women are quite guarded (and with good reason, no issues with that) but it does change your perception about if/how to approach. So much so that I've lost that confidence I used to have, as I just don't do it enough any more, if at all. It's a shame, but it is what it is
Can I have your silver ring
The one on your finger x
Random...
But sure! Wish it was a prescious metal but I'm afraid it's just stainless steel, made by yours truly. Worth absolutely nothing "The dirty things you done with that ring …. It probably needs deep sterilisation x | |||
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" I think the likelihood of a good outcome , even if it’s a no thanks, increases if the guy is attractive. And that therein is the rub." I mean, it’s probably true? Unfortunately the attractiveness card does help Also I’m not saying that if it’s from someone not attractive then it suddenly becomes harassment, I’ve been approached by guys that were a bit creepy but I never claimed they harassed me. As I dismissed them and they took it nicely and that was the end of that. Btw, You seem like a nice guy, so I’m sure you wouldn’t have that much of a problem to flirt out and about it you see a receptive woman x | |||
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"mmm..I get mistaken for being at uni..even though it was almost 30 years when i was a student. & If I don't have a beard I still get ID'd.." Crikey you could be my grandson! (Don't panic that's not an offer) | |||
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"mmm..I get mistaken for being at uni..even though it was almost 30 years when i was a student. & If I don't have a beard I still get ID'd.. Crikey you could be my grandson! (Don't panic that's not an offer)" Little brother, maybe
(Seeing as you're only 5 years older than me.)
-i get mistaken for a grandkid when I'm out with my mum. (Which kind of sucks for her..) | |||
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"mmm..I get mistaken for being at uni..even though it was almost 30 years when i was a student. & If I don't have a beard I still get ID'd.. Crikey you could be my grandson! (Don't panic that's not an offer) Little brother, maybe
(Seeing as you're only 5 years older than me.)
-i get mistaken for a grandkid when I'm out with my mum. (Which kind of sucks for her..)"Bless her! | |||
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"mmm..I get mistaken for being at uni..even though it was almost 30 years when i was a student. & If I don't have a beard I still get ID'd.. Crikey you could be my grandson! (Don't panic that's not an offer) Little brother, maybe
(Seeing as you're only 5 years older than me.)
-i get mistaken for a grandkid when I'm out with my mum. (Which kind of sucks for her..)"You got good genes then x | |||
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"mmm..I get mistaken for being at uni..even though it was almost 30 years when i was a student. & If I don't have a beard I still get ID'd.. Crikey you could be my grandson! (Don't panic that's not an offer) Little brother, maybe
(Seeing as you're only 5 years older than me.)
-i get mistaken for a grandkid when I'm out with my mum. (Which kind of sucks for her..)
You got good genes then x "-probably my dad's side.. | |||
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