FabSwingers.com forum: Envy versus jealousy

By *ornucopia OP Man
over a year ago

Bexley

I have long been bothered by the obvious lack of understanding of these terms by almost everyone and another thread has finally set me off on this.

I wish people would understand the simple difference between 'jealous' and 'envious'.

99% of the time people really mean 'envious',thankfully. Envy is a fairly normal activity.

Jealousy, on the other hand, is a totally different beast and not something anyone needs to get caught up with,EVER.It is nothing but destructive and ruins people's lives. I've been on the wrong end of it twice and that is more than enough.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For reference

jealousy

jealous resentment against a rival, a person enjoying success or advantage, etc., or against another's success or advantage itself.

mental uneasiness from suspicion or fear of rivalry, unfaithfulness, etc., as in love or aims.

vigilance in maintaining or guarding something.

a jealous feeling, disposition, state, or mood.

envy

noun:

a feeling of discontent or covetousness with regard to another's advantages, success, possessions, etc.

an object of such feeling:

Her intelligence made her the envy of her classmates.

Obsolete. ill will.

verb (used with object)

to regard (a person or thing) with envy:

She envies you for your success.

I envy your writing ability.

He envies her the position she has achieved in her profession.

verb (used without object)

Obsolete. to be affected with envy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thought I'd post those dictionary definitions with our commentary. So here's the commentary. Basically, the words are largely interchangeable to me, although jealousy seems more of a character trait than a state of mind at any one time.

For example, if I am hungry, I'm probably only hungry at that moment, it wouldn't be fair to say I am hungry always because I'm a hungry person. That's more like envy, a passing feeling.

Jealousy is like the darker cousin of envy. Am I envious of those with the nicer house over the road, yes to be honest, I'd like it if you asked. Does that mar my opinion to the people who live in it, do I think about it constantly worried that my house is inadequate, am I jealous, no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*without commentary

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I think that either can be destructive in their own way. Envy is the more acceptable version, on fab at any rate.

Jealousy is often an internal issue that tends to be projected outwards, usually associated with a fear of losing something of value to us.

Envy is often associated with wanting to do something or to be able to live like others do.

They’re generally synonyms of each other, however envy usually has fewer negative connotations associated with it. Less about possessing something and more to do with wishing that you could.

In those terms envy is more accepted on here, however they’re both negative emotions and both require self awareness to distance ourselves from

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people are human.

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By *adyBugsWoman
over a year ago

cognito

If it makes you feel something then it’s name isn’t really important it’s your reaction to it that counts.

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By *ornucopia OP Man
over a year ago

Bexley

Put in simple terms, one can be envious of someone's nice home or car but jealous of a rival (or more) in a relationship.

Two entirely different creatures. I know the difference. I'm just not sure that others do when bandying the the word 'jealous' about to cover all shades..

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