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MAN FLU

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How do i get rid of this...?

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"How do i get rid of this...?

"
Stick ya head down the loo and flush...clears the sinuses im told.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Suffer in silence. There is no known cure nor sympathy for this deadly virus

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How do i get rid of this...?

Stick ya head down the loo and flush...clears the sinuses im told. "

haha. Ive had it for 3 days. Doimg my nut in..

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By *ercedes62Woman
over a year ago

Northampton


"How do i get rid of this...?

"

0h no it sounds serious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately in many cases, it is fatal.

So first things first, write a will.

Secondly, pop and get some beechams

Thirdly, crawl back under your duvet.

Stay there !

Just to be on the safe side, put 999 on quick dial in your mobile

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How do i get rid of this...?

0h no it sounds serious "

Meaning i cant concentrate at work.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

1. Man-Flu is more painful than childbirth. This is an irrefutable

scientific fact*.

*(Based on a survey of over 100,000 men.)

2. Man-Flu is not 'just a cold'. It is a condition so severe that the

germs from a single Man-Flu sneeze could wipe out entire tribes of

people living in the rainforest. And probably loads of monkeys too.

3. Women do not contract Man-Flu. At worst they suffer from what is

medically recognised as a 'Mild Girly Sniffle' - which, if a man caught,

he would still be able to run, throw a ball, tear the phone book in half

and compete in all other kinds of manly activities.

4. Men do not 'moan' when they have Man-Flu. They emit involuntary

groans of agony that are entirely in proportion to the unbearable pain

they are in..

5. Full recovery from Man-Flu will take place much quicker if their

simple requests for care, sympathy and regular cups of tea or coffee are

met. Is that really so much to ask? Florence Nightingale would have done

it

6. More men die each year from MFN (Man-Flu Neglect) than lots and lots

of other things. (Like rabbit attacks or choking on toast).

7. Men suffering from Man-Flu want nothing more than to get out of bed

and come to work, but they are too selfless to risk spreading this awful

condition amongst their friends and colleagues. In this sense, they are

the greatest heroes this country has ever known.

8. In 1982 scientists managed to simulate the agonising symptoms of full

blown Man-Flu in a female chimp. She became so ill that her head

literally fell off.

9. Man-Flu germs are more powerful than Rambo, Batman and The A-Team

combined. They are too strong for weak, nasty tasting 'lady medicines'

like Lemsip, so don't bother trying to force them on a victim of

Man-Flu.

10. While it may seem like a Man-Flu sufferer is just lying around

enjoying 'Diagnosis Murder' it is a commonly recognised medical fact

that the exact pitch and frequency of Dick Van Dyke's voice has

remarkable soothing powers.

Every minute in this country one man is struck down by Man-Flu. Women,

all we ask is that each of you offers them a cup of tea or coffee, some

kind words and your undivided attention and care. Then maybe, just

maybe, we'll beat this monstrous disease together.

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