FabSwingers.com forum: Meeting a couple in a club

By *exy chill guy OP Man
over a year ago

London

I wondered what the etiquette is for approaching a couple in a club, with a view to taking things further if the vibe is there.

My experience is she is typically seeking to welcome, say with a spare seat next to her, while he is often either standing slightly back or not paying attention. (Or trying to look like he’s not paying attention?)

So I start a conversation with her. So far so good. But then after a while I start to wonder, should I acknowledge him? It seems rude to me to totally blank him, but if she isn’t showing the slightest sign of interest in him/ is just focussing in me, then should I follow her lead and ignore? Or should I make a specific effort to bring him into the conversation?

Particularly interested to hear from either half of a couple that goes to a club on their preferences and expectations…

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Personally we don't really put that much thought into it. I've never purposely left seats free with the hope of someone approaching and taking it and I can't say I've ever had a partner pretend not to pay attention. I'd say an exception to this is maybe when we're looking to play alone and are within the vicinity of the other chatting up a new potential play mate. Personally if I was with my partner and someone wished to join us both I would want them to talk to us both. I find it rude if someone ignores my partner if he is stood with me when they approach me.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would always acknowledge both of them

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *handlerMonicaCouple
over a year ago

Leicester

We wouldn't play alone in a club, so if a single guy struck up a conversation with M and ignored me, then it definitely wouldn't be going anywhere, we'd quickly excuse ourselves.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *exy chill guy OP Man
over a year ago

London

Thanks, good to know. I’d feel much more comfortable with everyone in the conversation.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would be so rude not to speak to both

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *exy chill guy OP Man
over a year ago

London

That’s what I thought. I’ll make the effort to bring mr into the convo.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be natural and chat to the couple at the club like you would someone down the pub. If they are cold or unwelcoming then you know its a non starter. Once the conversion is flowing ask them what they are looking for. Not all couples attend clubs with the intention of playing especially if it's their local club and they know people there. Swinging is a very social activity and not just about the sex.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

You fell at the first hurdle, you need to start with greeting and chatting to both of them equally , in your statement you use the "she" word a lot , the chances of you going any further with the lady might depend on if he approves of you.

But good luck and yes I have met and played with many couples but my focus has mostly been on the gentleman x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

A town near you perhaps

Is someone only talked to me and made no effort with Mr then I would make an excuse to move away from them fairly rapidly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread