FabSwingers.com forum: Restaurant honesty shame.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So last night I was out with my 3 children ( 21,17 and 11 years old) and Michelle. As usual the waitress interrupted us to ask if “ everything was ok”. To which I replied “ yea”. My son reminded me a time when a waiter had repeatedly bothered us non stop during a big ( 24 person plus ) meal asking if everything was ok, and then finally if “ there was anything he could do”. I suggested he left us all alone for ten mins to enjoy our meal in peace. Would you have done the same?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

No. Its a 2 second interaction, hardly an intrusion and its probably his boss making him doing it.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

Oh Bob

Yes but in a nicer way ...... Like, Yes thank you so much. We'd like to be left alone now and will let you know if there's anything else we want. You've been great.

Now fuck off and check that the beans are n't next to the eggs !!!! (Joking! )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I might have politely said that everything was fine and I would give him a shout if we needed anything else. I get annoyed if I don't get asked if everything is OK.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh Bob

Yes but in a nicer way ...... Like, Yes thank you so much. We'd like to be left alone now and will let you know if there's anything else we want. You've been great.

Now fuck off and check that the beans are n't next to the eggs !!!! (Joking! ) "

Love ya xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A" person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person."

Dave Barry

Just food for thought

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I might have politely said that everything was fine and I would give him a shout if we needed anything else. I get annoyed if I don't get asked if everything is OK. "

30 years ago they never asked. Is it an American thing that found its way over?

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I would have kept my eye out for him coming back for the umpteenth time and said For God's sake what do you want now?

And thrown my hands in the air in a dramatic way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And if there was something not quite right , and no one approached your table, that wouldn't be right either...

Waiting staff are simply doing a job , and the vast majority are trying to do it well.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"I might have politely said that everything was fine and I would give him a shout if we needed anything else. I get annoyed if I don't get asked if everything is OK. "

I've never expected waiting staff to ask if everything is ok.

I can't remember when it became a thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I might have politely said that everything was fine and I would give him a shout if we needed anything else. I get annoyed if I don't get asked if everything is OK.

30 years ago they never asked. Is it an American thing that found its way over? "

Really?

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"And if there was something not quite right , and no one approached your table, that wouldn't be right either...

Waiting staff are simply doing a job , and the vast majority are trying to do it well.

You raise your hand, click your fingers and shout loudly Garçon!!!

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
over a year ago

Pembrokeshire

I always answer them

fine, thanks,

rest assured, if it wasn't, you would know all about it lol

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"I might have politely said that everything was fine and I would give him a shout if we needed anything else. I get annoyed if I don't get asked if everything is OK.

30 years ago they never asked. Is it an American thing that found its way over? "

Sort of but it is a business thing too ....

If they come a few times and you say ...... Yes all is great thanks...

Then you can't complain after and if you do they can say .... well we asked and you said it was great......

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"I always answer them

fine, thanks,

rest assured, if it wasn't, you would know all about it lol"

Sounds a bit threaty

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A" person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person."

Dave Barry

Just food for thought"

I can’t disagree. When asked do you truly believe they mean it or it’s just part of the scenario and that they have to say it?

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By *orkswatcherMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

They always ask when I've a gob full of food

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"A" person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person."

Dave Barry

Just food for thought

I can’t disagree. When asked do you truly believe they mean it or it’s just part of the scenario and that they have to say it? "

They have to .........

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/10/21 17:39:49]

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By *areToShareCouple
over a year ago

Bingham

No problem with them asking if everything is OK..the issue is when the bast**ds wait til you've a mouthful of food before asking!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I wouldn't have, I'd have gibe for a more tactful 'great thankyou, well give you a shout if we need anything els' waiting tables is brutal, so many rude people and can almost guarantee they was being extra attentive because the last large party they had moaned that thay where spending so much money but got treat like everyone els and that expected a better level of attentiveness, you can literally never win when you have to work with the general public

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A" person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person."

Dave Barry

Just food for thought

I can’t disagree. When asked do you truly believe they mean it or it’s just part of the scenario and that they have to say it? "

Definitely prompted, part of their job, and they hate it too.

Mrs once worked as a waitress back then.

She felt uncomfortable having to pause people's conversations just to repeat the question.

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By *hubby CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Essex

You should think yourself lucky…We never get asked this when we’re dining in at Mc Donald’s.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

[Removed by poster at 03/10/21 17:45:08]

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I only mind it’s when chains do it and are half walking off before you even replied.

One of my pet hates is restaurants where they don’t do this and worse they don’t scan tables looking for customers needing something. I never tip them. I’ve had to get up in the past and find them for a drink, if this happens I insist on a discount on the bill for doing there job for them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Repeated asking would get on my nerves, and I would say we will let you know if we need anything else. Asking once is fine.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

I find folk at other tables that talk excessively loud for no apparent reason more annoying. ‘Has Joey gone to the toilet for a wee wee?’ Too much bloody information keep it to yourself

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You should think yourself lucky…We never get asked this when we’re dining in at Mc Donald’s.

Ahhhhhhjj. Don’t ever mention those lot. Do the drive through. Get 5 miles home and the c**ts have banged the unwanted and unrequested cheese on your burger. I give up lol.

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

I would have said thanks very much yes everything is okay if I need anything I’ll give you a shout – that way he knows there’s no problem and checking back with a table to make sure everything is okay is a way of making sure that at the end of the meal someone doesn’t bring something up that could’ve been rectified during the meal and then there’s an issue when some people will say well I’m not paying for that I’m not paying for this I’m not paying for the other so most restaurants will check with the table after delivery to make sure everything is okay I appreciate that some do possibly overdo it

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By *onb21Woman
over a year ago

Cardiff

I don't particularly like it either. I much prefer waiters who have the skills to catch someone's eye and read looks and gestures.

I also prefer an attitude by the waiter that the food is good and if there are issues it's an exception, not the rule. Asking every time makes me think I should question the food.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I find folk at other tables that talk excessively loud for no apparent reason more annoying. ‘Has Joey gone to the toilet for a wee wee?’ Too much bloody information keep it to yourself

Hell yea ( btw it’s my birthday today so i am entitling myself to moan a lot ) last night we were eating and the table next to us was choka with about 10 middle aged women. All having a fab time and making so much noise that Gas Turbine proof ear defenders wouldn’t protect. I mean did my little tribe need to know that one woman needed to change her tenor lady fanny pad? At 120 decibels.

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By *orkswatcherMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

[Removed by poster at 03/10/21 17:57:14]

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By *orkswatcherMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

"You should think yourself lucky…We never get asked this when we’re dining in at Mc Donald’s.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So last night I was out with my 3 children ( 21,17 and 11 years old) and Michelle. As usual the waitress interrupted us to ask if “ everything was ok”. To which I replied “ yea”. My son reminded me a time when a waiter had repeatedly bothered us non stop during a big ( 24 person plus ) meal asking if everything was ok, and then finally if “ there was anything he could do”. I suggested he left us all alone for ten mins to enjoy our meal in peace. Would you have done the same? "

Did you tell them off for putting the baked beans near your eggs when you had your cafe breakfast?

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By *hubby CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Essex

"You should think yourself lucky…We never get asked this when we’re dining in at Mc Donald’s.

Ahhhhhhjj. Don’t ever mention those lot. Do the drive through. Get 5 miles home and the c**ts have banged the unwanted and unrequested cheese on your burger. I give up lol. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a very important point raised in this thread. Beans should never be next to a fried egg. There has to be at least a sausage in between. As for the OP, if they ask if all is well once, fair enough. A second time, and I ask for water, or mustard, or pepper or something else. They tend to bring those and don't return.

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

I don’t have many rules but one is I’m never rude to anyone who is either delivering my food or are preparing it I’d hate to find someone had spat in my takeaway or pissed in my starter

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Did you tell them off for putting the baked beans near your eggs when you had your cafe breakfast? "

Absolutely not. It my preference but it’s not really worth upsetting anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would have kept my eye out for him coming back for the umpteenth time and said For God's sake what do you want now?

And thrown my hands in the air in a dramatic way."

im actually picturing you doing that moJojojofabuloso

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

"I find folk at other tables that talk excessively loud for no apparent reason more annoying. ‘Has Joey gone to the toilet for a wee wee?’ Too much bloody information keep it to yourself

Omg that’s hilarious

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

"I might have politely said that everything was fine and I would give him a shout if we needed anything else. I get annoyed if I don't get asked if everything is OK.

30 years ago they never asked. Is it an American thing that found its way over? "

I don't know what restaurants you've been eating in but it's always been a "thing" for as long as I've been eating out.

I'd much prefer attentive and visible staff than having to go looking for them.

Two of my children work in hospitality and they have been trained to know exactly when to approach and not to ask those questions just for the sake of it.

A cynical person might say it's done in the hope of a bigger tip but it's not always the case.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I might have politely said that everything was fine and I would give him a shout if we needed anything else. I get annoyed if I don't get asked if everything is OK.

30 years ago they never asked. Is it an American thing that found its way over?

I don't know what restaurants you've been eating in but it's always been a "thing" for as long as I've been eating out.

I'd much prefer attentive and visible staff than having to go looking for them.

Two of my children work in hospitality and they have been trained to know exactly when to approach and not to ask those questions just for the sake of it.

A cynical person might say it's done in the hope of a bigger tip but it's not always the case. "

My eldest daughter and my sons GF both work in eateries part time so I know the score. As a restaurant patron I just find overly attentive ( ie coming to our table all the time ) staff a pest. The old way where an experienced waiter was all eyes from a distance, looking for minimal signal was always the best way.

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