FabSwingers.com forum: Not a good feeling

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I am on the verge of losing the plot. I've had enough of life.

Anyone else ever feel like this. I can't be bothered any more.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

sorry you are feeling this way.

make a list of all the positives in your life, all the things that make you smile.... all the great memories.

get up in the morning and go for a good walk, take exercise... it will make a huge difference.

speak to your GP, employee counselling or the samaritans.

all the best to you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to remember that someone is always worse off than me...Take a look at the residents in a local hospice, children's hospital etc.. It's very sobering. I know life sometimes seems hopeless but a glass half full is so much more positive than a glass half empty , easy to say,I know, but life is worth celebrating, start with the little things that make u smile x

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Frequently.. but you get to the doc and get meds to sort you out.. Maybe get out running or on yer bike ..exercise and fresh air !

not really very appropriate on this day ... national suicide day, !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am on the verge of losing the plot. I've had enough of life.

Anyone else ever feel like this. I can't be bothered any more."

You have to look on the bright side, its shit at times but there is always another side when you come through it.

As for the plot well build a house on it

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

think thats what national suicide prevention day is about really, encouraging people to call out for help....even strangers on a swinging site.

Some people find it hard to speak to people they know, even hard to speak o their Dr's

like _iew said if you cannot speak to your friends/family/doctor the ring the samaritans, they are trained to listen and help

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Call someone. Find some company, you don't have to tell them why. Make the effort to keep busy even though it feels like it will kill you. It won't and it might allow the feeling to pass until you can get some help. Avoid alcohol and drugs.

Let us know that you are still here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Makes me sad to read this post OP, especially when I'm sitting here with a ticking time-bomb health wise.

I do think you need to see your GP and get them to help you with advice, meds and maybe referral on to a psychologist or counselor.

It's when you reach rock bottom and know you can't go down any further that you reach inside and find a spark of motivation to go out and get yourself some help to cope.

It's not easy but you will do it and the medical professionals will be there to help you. xxx

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

If thet is how you feel, here is may be not the best place for you as you have already found.... guys on here need to be able to deal with rejection.... you are probably not in the best place to do this.

Make an appointment to see your GP and talk. Ask for details of groups which can help.

Arrange to meet up with old friends from school.

Find some hobbies and interests outside of the house which will get you interacting with people face to face.

Use goggle to find support groups/forums.

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By *thlete0Couple
over a year ago

southend

We all get those feelings and then we all go past it! I always look at myself and think I look crap- I used to think I'm too short, then I thought I was going bald and now I don't really care lol it will be something else next lol xx

Good song “always look on the bright side of life”

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

"Makes me sad to read this post OP, especially when I'm sitting here with a ticking time-bomb health wise.

. xxx"

Laine Im sorry to read this . x chin up..thoughts are with you..

Think maybe this is a reaction to this thread yesterday. http://www.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/120169 maybe...

sorry for my lack of patience. hope he gets back to us and explains ..

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"Makes me sad to read this post OP, especially when I'm sitting here with a ticking time-bomb health wise.

. xxx

Laine Im sorry to read this . x chin up..thoughts are with you..

Think maybe this is a reaction to this thread yesterday. http://www.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/120169 maybe...

sorry for my lack of patience. hope he gets back to us and explains .."
i dont think a thread on a swingers site should be to blame if the OP is feeling like this tbh.....

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Equally then is it appropriate to post what OH has done .. cause concern and then have him ignore any message of support. on a swinging site. !

only trying to help.. alot of us feel that way and could help or advise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just remember ther is always someone worse off...it kept me going when my time was at its darkest

then i had a call from a friend just when i was wondering the same and put my life in perspective....now he really did have a bad time..made my issues seem small

just keep plugging away

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"Equally then is it appropriate to post what OH has done .. ."
Sorry cinnamon i dont understand this bit of what you are trying to say

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Posting a thread leading people to worry and then running off .. sorry its late my brain and fingers are tired .. apologies for not getting my words straight.

its a swinging site so there fore leaving people to worry ( me and others ) over night over someones mental health isnt appropriate . i have messaged him he has read and not replied ..here or privately.

my feeling is its a game.

he doesnt yet know forumites and the fact that people are concerned.]

it probably still deosnt read right but im tired so will jst wait a while and see if he bothers to accept the help that is being offered.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"Posting a thread leading people to worry and then running off .. sorry its late my brain and fingers are tired .. apologies for not getting my words straight.

my feeling is its a game.

he doesnt yet know forumites and the fact that people are concerned.]

it probably still deosnt read right but im tired so will jst wait a while and see if he bothers to accept the help that is being offered.

"
I understand now .....

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

NICE SHOES

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No no , it's not a game. I meant to reply.

Thank you everyone for your kind words...I have had these periods I my life before , normally I just go with the flow and let it take it corse but both my parents are unwell and I am currently facing redundancy from my job (NHS of all places!) and I think I've just sunk! I am sure I'll be ok soon. It's nice to hear many people are kind! x

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"No no , it's not a game. I meant to reply.

Thanks for letting us know. Try and sleep and let us know you are still with us in the morning. Take care.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am on the verge of losing the plot. I've had enough of life.

Anyone else ever feel like this. I can't be bothered any more."

Keep it simple:

hungry, horny, or tired. sorted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am uneasy about threads like this.

None of us know the OP and any circumstances.

From his opening statement the word suicide was then mentioned by a poster and terms like 'let us know if you are with us in the morning'. I know the statements are all well meaning and in good faith, but its not a good idea to put words and feelings like this to a person you don't know, or have any idea of how it will be interpreted. You are projecting your own interpretation of what has been said. Who knows whether you are doing more harm than good, none of us because we are not really aware of the circumstances.

It sounds uncaring on my part, but it truly isn't. I know people are well meaning but caution needs to be applied because we can't know the consequences of anything we say on here and all the overwhelming sympathy might not actually be the right thing.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"I am on the verge of losing the plot. I've had enough of life.

Anyone else ever feel like this. I can't be bothered any more."

You do you can ring the samitios there there for people want to talk and have rant with. They let you do all the adont put ther point of _iews.

If a family member think that you are really loosing it they can you sectioned they thin you are well enough to go home. You also walk straight in to some mental health units and tell them how you feel.

I will admit i didnt take your thread seriousy, there are some brilliant even online there is good sites to gon., add .

\But my best is to go yo your doctor an d poor you heart, if you think yu will not get the true feelings write down on a peice of paper and take it with you and he could one of afew things give, you somee medicztion, give you s nurse to come to visit you

Dont be scared the stigma of mental illness doesnt have the stigma attatched to it as before. But only you can make that call. HAve a good nights and think about

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I am uneasy about threads like this.

None of us know the OP and any circumstances.

You are not alone: I don't like these types of threads either and the "there, there poor you" type responses they illicit.

If the op is feeling down I personally don't think this site is the best place to be as rejection won't add to his wellbeing.

Seek professional help.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Posting a thread leading people to worry and then running off .. sorry its late my brain and fingers are tired .. apologies for not getting my words straight.

my feeling is its a game.

he doesnt yet know forumites and the fact that people are concerned.]

it probably still deosnt read right but im tired so will jst wait a while and see if he bothers to accept the help that is being offered.

I understand now .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Since reading this post early this morning, I've thought of nothing else, and the more I think about it the more angry I become!

I will stop there before I go on to a full blown screaming rant!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"sorry you are feeling this way.

make a list of all the positives in your life, all the things that make you smile.... all the great memories.

get up in the morning and go for a good walk, take exercise... it will make a huge difference.

speak to your GP, employee counselling or the samaritans.

all the best to you"
well said _iew and yes Samaritans are there 24 hours and will listen . A Lot of the time its getting things off there chest out in the open and it helps. Thay will never tell you what to do just be there for you .

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By *bbandflowCouple
over a year ago

South Devon

"sorry you are feeling this way.

make a list of all the positives in your life, all the things that make you smile.... all the great memories.

get up in the morning and go for a good walk, take exercise... it will make a huge difference.

speak to your GP, employee counselling or the samaritans.

all the best to you well said _iew and yes Samaritans are there 24 hours and will listen . A Lot of the time its getting things off there chest out in the open and it helps. Thay will never tell you what to do just be there for you . "

Thanks for making that point..Samaritans are there to support, and predominantly to listen.

Well meant advice, like counting your blessings etc are largely irrelevant to those who are genuinely in the dark place that potential suicides occupy..

Empathic listening is the key..and like others on this thread I would ask the OP to consider making that call.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

"Since reading this post early this morning, I've thought of nothing else, and the more I think about it the more angry I become!

I will stop there before I go on to a full blown screaming rant!!!"

Which part made u angry .. I am disapointed he didnt bother to reply to my personal message.

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By *bbandflowCouple
over a year ago

South Devon

"Since reading this post early this morning, I've thought of nothing else, and the more I think about it the more angry I become!

I will stop there before I go on to a full blown screaming rant!!!

Which part made u angry .. I am disapointed he didnt bother to reply to my personal message.

Unfortunately, normal rational responses are often absent when dealing with persons in genuine need ..indeed, Samaritans have to deal with anger, hate, and abuse

...there is no way of knowing the emotional state of the OP, hence as others have said, perhaps this the wrong place.

Bless you though, for taking the trouble to care!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since reading this post early this morning, I've thought of nothing else, and the more I think about it the more angry I become!

I will stop there before I go on to a full blown screaming rant!!!"
I think most people in life at some point get low and can be to do with all sorts of things ...And the mind can play all sorts of tricks on us .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

aaaw it's so hard when this happens but just remember that it does happen to everyone at some time.

You can't be on top all the time unfortunately.

Just for a little while ... allow it to be ... don't feel bad because you feel that way, don't feel guilty because you don't think you have the right to feel that way ... just be in the moment, let it ride, and then start thinking about what you're gonna do next ... take a walk and make a plan (hug)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is definitely not a good place for you to be OP. It takes confidence to be a single man on here.

Log off, get out of the house, and concentrate on building up your self-esteem and confidence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since reading this post early this morning, I've thought of nothing else, and the more I think about it the more angry I become!

I will stop there before I go on to a full blown screaming rant!!!

Which part made u angry .. I am disapointed he didnt bother to reply to my personal message.

"
Just the pure selfishness of it all!

Personally I think someone who claims to be so unstable should have their profile removed for their own protection, better to have one rejection than one hundred if your feeling so vulnerable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since reading this post early this morning, I've thought of nothing else, and the more I think about it the more angry I become!

I will stop there before I go on to a full blown screaming rant!!!

Which part made u angry .. I am disapointed he didnt bother to reply to my personal message.

Just the pure selfishness of it all!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Since reading this post early this morning, I've thought of nothing else, and the more I think about it the more angry I become!

I will stop there before I go on to a full blown screaming rant!!!

Which part made u angry .. I am disapointed he didnt bother to reply to my personal message.

Just the pure selfishness of it all!

Personally I think someone who claims to be so unstable should have their profile removed for their own protection, better to have one rejection than one hundred if your feeling so vulnerable. lisen theres people here and it dont matter if its a swingers site or what site .. some will have been there themselfs and know how this feel .. he is not alone .. "
And he's so grateful for everyone's kind words and offers of support that when he logged on this morning he added a little comment to let everyone know he's ok and say thankyou!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At various times in your life you are going to face challenges, massive highs and massive lows - that is part of what makes life so special.

You can't feel one without experiencing the other.

Sadly, some people find it hard to cope when things aren't going well and by no means are you on your own in this.

Some people are natural born worriers, who jumble their thoughts and concerns up until they become entangled to such a degree that you believe you have to resolve them all at once and that all are intertwined and linked.

That is seldom the case and you do need to prioritise what your worries are, how you are going to address them and in what way so that it best affects the other worries you have.

Some people try to do this alone - of those, some succeed through self will, determination and good choices.

Others don't.

Some people have excellent support from family and friends and feel open to discuss their worries with those people.

Shared experiences are learning from others experience are what forms part of our make up and sculpts who we are now and who we are likely to be in the future.

Other people cannot cope (or find it hard to cope) with life without professional help and in some cases medication.

Whilst the stigma relating to those things has undoubtedly diminished over the last decade, I do feel that resorting to professional help and medication should be a last resort option and that, if anything, counselling / couching is the way to go.

If you already work for the NHS, I should imagine schemes exist in your workplace where you can seek such help - so why not look at those options ?

Popping pills does not resolve the issues that people have, it merely stifles or disguises them, so learning to cope with your psyche will reap more longer term benefits than quick fix medication will.

In answer to your initial question though, yes, I have felt like that from time to time and more so when I was younger as I was less well equipped in knowing how to deal with it and how to channel it.

I am a natural born worrier but I am fortunate that I have the resolve and the family relationships and friendships in place to discuss very openly and candidly.

Through that I have found myself far more confident and able to open up with people than I ever thought possible when I was younger.

I am lucky and I recognise that.

Life is good. I am happy.

But curve balls will always be present to knock you off course - it is how you deal with them that is the important thing.

In a way, it is nice to see that you are comfortable enough to make a brave post like this in an open forum, especially when a good number of the contributors aren't renowned for their sympathy and comfort.

On the other hand, like your 'am i ugly ?' thread of a few days ago, I can't help but think that you may be using some of the responses to this thread to re-affirm your own self worth / self belief, or should I say, lack of it.

If you have genuine worries, if you can speak to family and friends, then do so.

If you can't then see a doctor or a support group who will be able to direct or focus your worries and potentially assist with them.

One thing is for sure though, ONLY YOU can turn a negative into a positive !

I wish you well x

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

That remark was left last night before I went to bed .. he was on 3 hours ago..has probably read all this and fallen about laughing ... I think he is probably gloating at all the fuss. . but hey ho we all get drawn in .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That remark was left last night before I went to bed .. he was on 3 hours ago..has probably read all this and fallen about laughing ... I think he is probably gloating at all the fuss. . but hey ho we all get drawn in .

"
Thing is you can never be to sure .. we dont know.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Mr Rose

People are waiting for you to respond .. think it would be polite to actually assure them you are fine and seeking help. Rather than sitting back and just waiting... for what .?

hope you are dealing with your health today. x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hello all. Sorry about late reply. I didn't log off on my iPhone.

Thank you all for your concern and kind words. I really means a lot.

I am still alive and I wouldn't take my own life - nothing is that bad and that would do anything except hurt my lived ones.

Please don't be angry at my late reply!

As I said I am facing redundancy, both my parents are unwell, my dad has had a series of strokes. I have been working all the hours going and looking after them whilst my lazy brother sits on his bum!

Again,thank you all xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think thats all any one wanted was to know your ok xxxx

Things will get better i promise ...

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