FabSwingers.com forum: Bizarre excuses in A & E

By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Some docs and nurses really do see the strangest things, from hoover ends stuck on somebody's dick as he had"fallen onto the hoover" while vacuuming.... to other quite incredible events.

A medic friend of mine has told of many really hilarious stories - anybody on Fabs want to share any unusual mishaps they experienced or were told about? Please only those funny ones where nobody got seriously hurt -

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

This is a true story.

My mums friend has a 14 year old son and he had to go to A & E because he got a fork stuck up his bottom. he got constipated, didnt know what to do and tried to "dig" it out and got the fork stuck. Jay hates me telling that story lol

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"This is a true story.

oh my god!! thats hilarious....only a boy would think of that

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By *ethany10Couple
over a year ago

falkirk

Lol got quite a few from my days as a paramedic

Steve

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

My friend is an a&e doc.... She told me a cpl of years ago about a guy who came in who had "slipped while in the loo having a pee"

The result of his "slip and fall" was that the toilet brush handle was firmly inserted into his arse with just the brush sticking out...

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"My friend is an a&e doc.... She told me a cpl of years ago about a guy who came in who had "slipped while in the loo having a pee"

The result of his "slip and fall" was that the toilet brush handle was firmly inserted into his arse with just the brush sticking out...

something like that was on junior doctors on bbc3...the had to operate to get it out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The town d*unk in place I live once had a 3 sum with his then girlfriend and a woman down the street from them. Pretty normally really except the girls decided to experiment on him and used a hair brush on him. Sadly with them being d*unk they used the bristle end first and got the brush stuck in his ass. A trip to hospital and his ass was brush free hahaha.

This may be rumours but if you actually bring it up around him he proudly admits it happened

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've heard allsorts about things up arses and people doing the old "I tripped and fell"which you might believe if it didn't have a condom on the end lol.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Reading all these ... and listening to my mate, I wonder what people think when they make up these stories. Goodness the staff in A & E must have heard it all before in 99 variations on a "theme"

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By *hmeohmyMan
over a year ago

A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???

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By *toneblueMan
over a year ago

Southampton

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???"

Why? Because it was dark up there of course!

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???

Why? Because it was dark up there of course!

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By *abloBackMan
over a year ago

London

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???"

Bayonet or screw fitting?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I worked in A&E during my nursing training and we had a lady in with a round hairbrush stuck up her jack and danny..it had to be surgically removed as it had caused so much swelling there was no way it was coming out without assistance .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???

Why? Because it was dark up there of course!

How an earth didn't it break?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had a patient who had had a hard on for a day, wouldnt go down no matter ehst, until he was told he was going to theatre to have ut drained, he then admitted to taking 3, viagra

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By *abloBackMan
over a year ago

London

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???

Why? Because it was dark up there of course!

How an earth didn't it break?

It still had the shade on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???

Why? Because it was dark up there of course!

How an earth didn't it break?

It still had the shade on"

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???

Bayonet or screw fitting?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???"

Maybe she wanted to shed some light on the matter!

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???

Maybe she wanted to shed some light on the matter!"
Hilarious!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

These all remind me of a programme i watched a few years back called sex gone wrong. Some hilarious stories on there.

One guy in a swimming pool got turned on over some lass which was there and he put his cock in the vent where the water is blown into the pool and he got it stuck. Had to shut the pool, drain it and cut the vent out to free him.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"These all remind me of a programme i watched a few years back called sex gone wrong. Some hilarious stories on there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Another was a lass and her bf were to horny and she was to dry for him to enter her and with not having any lube they used vaseline as a substitue. Well they spent the night in an ice bath instead of what either wanted hahahaha.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Has anyone seen the video of the man with the jam jar up his arse?

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By *abloBackMan
over a year ago

London

"A friend of mine works in an X-ray department and a few years back had a woman go in with a light bulb up her bum, I saw the X-rays too

, why ???"

She wanted a light sex session

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By *odka n CokeCouple
over a year ago

Greater London

I saw a programme on TV once of a guy who had to go to theatre to have a potato and a jar of jam removed...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know of many stories of patients presenting at A&E with objects stuck in orifices, some funny and some equally disturbing which didn't end well.

I rather liked the story a friend told me about a dogs bone inserted in the anus. Its amazing really how many people slip and fall when getting out of the bath and objects just seem to find themselves in one particular area.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This was in a local newspaper to some relatives of ours.

A vicar was taken to a&e because he was cleaning his windows naked and just happened to slip and fall onto.a.peeled king edward potato. Or.so he claimed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was told about a couple having sex with heated curling tongs. Not plugged in, cause that would be sick. In the midst of passion he used them on her, except......... When he twisted the handle the spikes came out. It was still there when she came in to a&e trailling the cord behind her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be fair a lot of people do use domestic items in sex acts that aren't designed for that purpose and these can do untold damage. I have seen lots of pics and also threads about what has been used.

I would never use any item, only a recogniswd sex toy. Most people can get things inside, its getting them out again that's the problem, as the body can create a vacuum inside. I'd much rather people go into A&E with items still inserted, rather than cause the damage they do by pulling out with force, if you have to have corrective surgery then the doctors are going to know what's happened anyway.

Yes it might be embarrassing going into A&E with Henry the Hoover still attached to you but its better than having your insides hanging out isn't it

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

I once read a book called bizarre er which had lots of stories about thing getting stuck inside people or on people lol

Saddest one was where a poodle got stuck on a guys cock......they had to put the poodle to sleep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I once read a book called bizarre er which had lots of stories about thing getting stuck inside people or on people lol

Saddest one was where a poodle got stuck on a guys cock......they had to put the poodle to sleep

A Poodle?!

Surely he could have chosen a better looking dog

Then again he could have stooped lower and shagged a chuaua

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By *abloBackMan
over a year ago

London

I heard it was a shitzu story

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok 2 guys, one with a burnt face and a broken nose and the other, a burnt peritoneum and a dead hamster in his ass. You try to work out what happened!

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By *ola cubesMan
over a year ago

coatbridge

funniest one which i know is definatly true was my mate getting a glass milk btl removed from his cock dosnt sound so bad till you realise it was full raw liver

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3_Jt_g10Jug

try this..

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By *ashful BazMan
over a year ago

poole dorset

Was sat in A and E years ago with a fish hook stuck in my thumb, felt a right plonker.

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