FabSwingers.com forum: Sunday morning musing......

By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

So loungers..... permit me, if you will, to delve into your minds once again, with a not so happy subject....

As we know, sometimes, sadly, fab couples split. The pair then may remain on fab to seek out new connections, as is their choice.

It seems, from conversations I've had, that in several cases the male of the couple, no matter how popular he was with others when they were together, then becomes instantly an outcast, just one of the pack of single men.

Is this purely the "single man effect" do you think? Or could there be some deeper psychology at play here?

Thanks all for reading. Thoughts please

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Probably just having to return to the single men on fab

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By *urvyBi-84Man
over a year ago

Lancs

I guess it could depend on why the couple split up, if known, and maybe on what kind of meets they had. If they did a lot of MMF meets, for example, or bi MFF meets, or if they only played together.

Either way, a guy who is out of a couple and now on here as single will have the single guy effect to deal with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There will be an element of ‘he was with her so I won’t touch him with a barge pole or I’ll be rounded on’

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Probably just having to return to the single men on fab"

That's what I thought.... but if he's well known and liked with those they've met, I would have thought he would still be so.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I guess it could depend on why the couple split up, if known, and maybe on what kind of meets they had. If they did a lot of MMF meets, for example, or bi MFF meets, or if they only played together.

Either way, a guy who is out of a couple and now on here as single will have the single guy effect to deal with. "

That's true. And I guess the reasons for splitting are subjective. There are always those 3 truths.... his, hers and then what actually happened.

(Not saying anyone is lying, just that perception changes things)

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"There will be an element of ‘he was with her so I won’t touch him with a barge pole or I’ll be rounded on’"

And yet she is almost always still in demand. I suppose that's the inequality part.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"There will be an element of ‘he was with her so I won’t touch him with a barge pole or I’ll be rounded on’"

An element of that, but also a bit of respect for the female (especially if a friend), some lines aren’t to be crossed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably sycalogical it’s like losing your wife lose everything only my thoughts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are we talking about exclusive couples? Or people perceived as they are both off the market xx

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Maybe he was always the 3rd wheel?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My experience was just the reverse.

So I left for a while, to rebuild my confidence.

I also learned to use the forums without getting too friendly with most of the ladies, since it bit me quite firmly on the butt the first time!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"There will be an element of ‘he was with her so I won’t touch him with a barge pole or I’ll be rounded on’

An element of that, but also a bit of respect for the female (especially if a friend), some lines aren’t to be crossed. "

In that case should it not be true the other way around?

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"There will be an element of ‘he was with her so I won’t touch him with a barge pole or I’ll be rounded on’

An element of that, but also a bit of respect for the female (especially if a friend), some lines aren’t to be crossed.

In that case should it not be true the other way around?"

You’ll need to ask the men that question, do they have a code ?

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By *r.SJMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough

In my experience... yes, as a single get lost in the sea of many and after a split the self doubt also kicks in and confidence can take a knock and can take a while to find your own identity here, especially when alongside those singles that have been a while.

Plus, as a couple (personal experience) and again due to the ratio of men to women/ couples... it was normally the ex that attracted the attention.

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By *ervent_fervourMan
over a year ago

Halifax

"I guess it could depend on why the couple split up, if known, and maybe on what kind of meets they had. If they did a lot of MMF meets, for example, or bi MFF meets, or if they only played together.

Either way, a guy who is out of a couple and now on here as single will have the single guy effect to deal with.

That's true. And I guess the reasons for splitting are subjective. There are always those 3 truths.... his, hers and then what actually happened.

(Not saying anyone is lying, just that perception changes things)"

That's a good point. I was assuming you meant the (hypothetical) split was basically just natural /fairly amicable?

In which case it points to the idea that maybe women do have the ultimate power, or influence here. Which in this patriarchal society is pretty damned good.

Even though us also rans sometimes feel a bit neglected.. But hey, taking personal perspective out of it.., that's positive.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Probably sycalogical it’s like losing your wife lose everything only my thoughts

Surely that should be true the other way?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the woman starts a thread telling everyone that he's a great guy and shouldn't be treated as a pariah when he turns into a single male profile he might just do okay

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Are we talking about exclusive couples? Or people perceived as they are both off the market xx "

Actual couples.

Although I suppose either....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Maybe he was always the 3rd wheel?"

That could be the case I suppose. But that makes me sad that people are that two faced..... to make him feel an equal friend to her when they don't feel that is cruel.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"My experience was just the reverse.

So I left for a while, to rebuild my confidence.

I also learned to use the forums without getting too friendly with most of the ladies, since it bit me quite firmly on the butt the first time!"

Wise words.....

I didn't think of it happening the other way round....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"There will be an element of ‘he was with her so I won’t touch him with a barge pole or I’ll be rounded on’

An element of that, but also a bit of respect for the female (especially if a friend), some lines aren’t to be crossed.

In that case should it not be true the other way around?

You’ll need to ask the men that question, do they have a code ?

I would hope so..... but evidence seems not.

Men? Any comments?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just becomes another number IMHO. Let's be honest unless he is something a bit special it's the female part of the couple that likely attracted the attention.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"In my experience... yes, as a single get lost in the sea of many and after a split the self doubt also kicks in and confidence can take a knock and can take a while to find your own identity here, especially when alongside those singles that have been a while.

Plus, as a couple (personal experience) and again due to the ratio of men to women/ couples... it was normally the ex that attracted the attention. "

It baffles me that when you've both been a part of the dynamic and people have claimed to have enjoyed you as much as her, and been your "friend", that they just cut you off.

I'm quite naïve about it I guess.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the smugness of (some) males in couples that irritates

Oh how the mighty fall when they don't have have a skirt to ride on the back of

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I guess it could depend on why the couple split up, if known, and maybe on what kind of meets they had. If they did a lot of MMF meets, for example, or bi MFF meets, or if they only played together.

Either way, a guy who is out of a couple and now on here as single will have the single guy effect to deal with.

That's true. And I guess the reasons for splitting are subjective. There are always those 3 truths.... his, hers and then what actually happened.

(Not saying anyone is lying, just that perception changes things)

That's a good point. I was assuming you meant the (hypothetical) split was basically just natural /fairly amicable?

In which case it points to the idea that maybe women do have the ultimate power, or influence here. Which in this patriarchal society is pretty damned good.

Even though us also rans sometimes feel a bit neglected.. But hey, taking personal perspective out of it.., that's positive. "

Regardless of how the hypothetical split is (was?), there are always the 3 truths in a situation....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"If the woman starts a thread telling everyone that he's a great guy and shouldn't be treated as a pariah when he turns into a single male profile he might just do okay "

And if they aren't forum users? There's more to fab and to swinging than our little corner.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Just becomes another number IMHO. Let's be honest unless he is something a bit special it's the female part of the couple that likely attracted the attention."

I think in this dog eat dog world he could be Chris Hemsworth and she would still be the one attracting attention....

(Other celebrities who are perfection are allegedly available as an example. But no one beats the Hemsworth)

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"It's the smugness of (some) males in couples that irritates

Oh how the mighty fall when they don't have have a skirt to ride on the back of "

I didn't consider that....

So regardless of how he was perceived as the half of a couple, some may think that way I guess....

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Plus, as a couple (personal experience) and again due to the ratio of men to women/ couples... it was normally the ex that attracted the attention.

It baffles me that when you've both been a part of the dynamic and people have claimed to have enjoyed you as much as her, and been your "friend", that they just cut you off.

I'm quite naïve about it I guess."

Remaining friends is one thing and I’ve never understood why anyone has to takes sides when a couple splits, when it is just purely friendship you had with both.

On a site like this though, I’m assuming you are referencing the sexual side of things and that is where the code would kick in, for me anyway. It just doesn’t feel right to go with a friend’s ex knowing what they had or the possibility of hurting the other.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If the woman starts a thread telling everyone that he's a great guy and shouldn't be treated as a pariah when he turns into a single male profile he might just do okay

And if they aren't forum users? There's more to fab and to swinging than our little corner."

I guess he just wasn't as popular as he may have thought he was

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just becomes another number IMHO. Let's be honest unless he is something a bit special it's the female part of the couple that likely attracted the attention.

I think in this dog eat dog world he could be Chris Hemsworth and she would still be the one attracting attention....

(Other celebrities who are perfection are allegedly available as an example. But no one beats the Hemsworth)"
oh yeah, as someone pointed out it's a woman's world in here. Even in nature the female chooses her mate, we are just animals too. Even in dating women will get lots of approaches then choose who she wants. It's always been that way and always will. Lot of men need to up their game if they want to be chosen IMHO.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's the smugness of (some) males in couples that irritates

Oh how the mighty fall when they don't have have a skirt to ride on the back of

I didn't consider that....

So regardless of how he was perceived as the half of a couple, some may think that way I guess...."

I just think if he is now single, he needs to find his own way rather than relying on his former relationship to define him as a single swinger

The male half of a couple is a very different dynamic than a single male and there are adjustments to outlook, attitude and expectations that need to be addressed by him singularly, without others 'helping him along' if that makes sense?

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

Plus, as a couple (personal experience) and again due to the ratio of men to women/ couples... it was normally the ex that attracted the attention.

It baffles me that when you've both been a part of the dynamic and people have claimed to have enjoyed you as much as her, and been your "friend", that they just cut you off.

I'm quite naïve about it I guess.

Remaining friends is one thing and I’ve never understood why anyone has to takes sides when a couple splits, when it is just purely friendship you had with both.

I do entirely agree with you on both points.

The code is definitely a factor where it is an actual friendship. But where it is purely a sexual type friendship anyway, would that be an issue?

I've not been in the situation so can only muse.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Just becomes another number IMHO. Let's be honest unless he is something a bit special it's the female part of the couple that likely attracted the attention.

I think in this dog eat dog world he could be Chris Hemsworth and she would still be the one attracting attention....

(Other celebrities who are perfection are allegedly available as an example. But no one beats the Hemsworth)oh yeah, as someone pointed out it's a woman's world in here. Even in nature the female chooses her mate, we are just animals too. Even in dating women will get lots of approaches then choose who she wants. It's always been that way and always will. Lot of men need to up their game if they want to be chosen IMHO. "

Here is very different to dating in the real world for many of us....

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"It's the smugness of (some) males in couples that irritates

Oh how the mighty fall when they don't have have a skirt to ride on the back of

I didn't consider that....

So regardless of how he was perceived as the half of a couple, some may think that way I guess....

I just think if he is now single, he needs to find his own way rather than relying on his former relationship to define him as a single swinger

That really does make sense. You always do Bussy

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By *andsome HandMan
over a year ago

roundabout

I'd imagine it's the single man effect though that depends on other factors.

I remember a similar situation from years back. Quite a popular couple split and set up single profiles. To all intents and purposes his previous coupling was of little weight.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just becomes another number IMHO. Let's be honest unless he is something a bit special it's the female part of the couple that likely attracted the attention.

I think in this dog eat dog world he could be Chris Hemsworth and she would still be the one attracting attention....

Here is very different to dating in the real world for many of us...."
I beg to differ it's just an exaggerated version, the dynamic is the same.

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By *wingfellowMan
over a year ago

my own little sanctuary

I find this one quite interesting OP.

I reckon initially following the split things would be a bit different yes, but even if it were a reasonably short relationship the way we engage with others changes and as such I believe returning to the pool so to speak makes one realise we’ve lost a bit of that capability. As you become familiar with the site again you can pick up the charm again but for a while it’ll be a struggle.

As for the sense of being outcast by others for the break up itself I think if you are unapologetically yourself people in time will come to realise that you’re simply being you... some people will never like you for that but others will. Basically I think things work out all in good time

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'd imagine it's the single man effect though that depends on other factors.

I remember a similar situation from years back. Quite a popular couple split and set up single profiles. To all intents and purposes his previous coupling was of little weight. "

It just baffles me.... not that the previous coupling wouldn't have an effect on anything new, but that people who claimed friendship would drop like flies.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Just becomes another number IMHO. Let's be honest unless he is something a bit special it's the female part of the couple that likely attracted the attention.

I think in this dog eat dog world he could be Chris Hemsworth and she would still be the one attracting attention....

Here is very different to dating in the real world for many of us....

I beg to differ it's just an exaggerated version, the dynamic is the same."

Really this is a different subject, but my experience tells me differently

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd imagine it's the single man effect though that depends on other factors.

I remember a similar situation from years back. Quite a popular couple split and set up single profiles. To all intents and purposes his previous coupling was of little weight.

It just baffles me.... not that the previous coupling wouldn't have an effect on anything new, but that people who claimed friendship would drop like flies."

It highlights the oft fickle nature of fab friendship

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I find this one quite interesting OP.

Now that's a far brighter outlook..... I like it.

Despite the rejection from the past, good things can be over the horizon

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By *andsome HandMan
over a year ago

roundabout

"I'd imagine it's the single man effect though that depends on other factors.

I remember a similar situation from years back. Quite a popular couple split and set up single profiles. To all intents and purposes his previous coupling was of little weight.

It just baffles me.... not that the previous coupling wouldn't have an effect on anything new, but that people who claimed friendship would drop like flies."

That's pants behaviour and shows the supposed friendship was lightweight. The fella I mentioned lost a few friends too.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

It depends whether they were a) truly a couple. b) a fab couple or c) one part of the couple thought they were a couple whilst the other half of said couple did not (this can be broken down into c1 deliberately misleading sending out wrong signals or c2 the other half is possessive or created their own narrative)

A) - if well known likely to be avoided. Women’s code is different from men’s, so the male half goes back into the throng and has a smaller pool of choice. The female goes back into the throng and is “fair game” for the majority.

B) - Again if well known, will be avoided by some but may have created interest because of online behaviour/persona, goes back into throng with slight advantage.

C1). - will likely be “outed” as a “player” will go back into throng, probably avoiding forums or close local social groups. May delete profile and start again.

C2 - likelihood is that the male will need to hide/delete for a while as said possessive moves on to next target, 12 months seems to work but there will always be whispers that he was C1. When in fact he wasn’t.

Regardless the man is one single man amongst many. The positives he had built up during his time in a couple will count for nothing. However rumour and gossip will follow him around (deserved or not) and will impact wider social activity outside of just having a profile and trying to arrange meets

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By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

What women say about each other on the forums is sometimes different to what they think in private

I suspect this may play a part in the conundrum

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Fab friends aren't always friends. Their friendship is based upon what they perceive they can get from you. Once that is removed, so is any reason for them to maintain the pretence of a friendship.

My sub lost a few “friends” here (as well as receive abuse in other ways) once she updated her profile to mention she was now in a D/s relationship, even though her profile still mentions she is free to meet should she so desire.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Plus, as a couple (personal experience) and again due to the ratio of men to women/ couples... it was normally the ex that attracted the attention.

It baffles me that when you've both been a part of the dynamic and people have claimed to have enjoyed you as much as her, and been your "friend", that they just cut you off.

I'm quite naïve about it I guess.

Remaining friends is one thing and I’ve never understood why anyone has to takes sides when a couple splits, when it is just purely friendship you had with both.

I do entirely agree with you on both points.

The code is definitely a factor where it is an actual friendship. But where it is purely a sexual type friendship anyway, would that be an issue?

I've not been in the situation so can only muse."

I can’t answer that one as not been in that position where it was a sexual friendship.

I think until you find yourself in that position, having to think about would you sexually go with an ex of a ‘friend’ or indeed someone you see as a friend, only then do you start to process the pros & cons, every situation will be different depending on various factors.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'd imagine it's the single man effect though that depends on other factors.

I remember a similar situation from years back. Quite a popular couple split and set up single profiles. To all intents and purposes his previous coupling was of little weight.

It just baffles me.... not that the previous coupling wouldn't have an effect on anything new, but that people who claimed friendship would drop like flies.

That's pants behaviour and shows the supposed friendship was lightweight. The fella I mentioned lost a few friends too."

I couldn't agree more. People can be dicks

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"It depends whether they were a) truly a couple. b) a fab couple or c) one part of the couple thought they were a couple whilst the other half of said couple did not (this can be broken down into c1 deliberately misleading sending out wrong signals or c2 the other half is possessive or created their own narrative)

B) - Again if well known, will be avoided by some but may have created interest because of online behaviour/persona, goes back into throng with slight advantage.

C1). - will likely be “outed” as a “player” will go back into throng, probably avoiding forums or close local social groups. May delete profile and start again.

You've definitely covered everything there as always, P. I do think perhaps a lot of it does come down to the difference in women's "code" to men's. That is of course not all women, and not all men.

I can't help but feel for those men in C2 particularly.... where the rumours have little base in fact yet affect them so greatly.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"What women say about each other on the forums is sometimes different to what they think in private

I suspect this may play a part in the conundrum "

No?! Surely not

I think you're almost certainly right. And not just on the forums. There's a whole world of variety in what people say, be it real world, public, private or in a group.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Fab friends aren't always friends. Their friendship is based upon what they perceive they can get from you. Once that is removed, so is any reason for them to maintain the pretence of a friendship.

That's certainly a major factor. And one that straddles the gender divide as well. Hence why many (myself included) would be reluctant to announce any relationship or bond. I say well done to her quite frankly.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

Plus, as a couple (personal experience) and again due to the ratio of men to women/ couples... it was normally the ex that attracted the attention.

It baffles me that when you've both been a part of the dynamic and people have claimed to have enjoyed you as much as her, and been your "friend", that they just cut you off.

I'm quite naïve about it I guess.

Remaining friends is one thing and I’ve never understood why anyone has to takes sides when a couple splits, when it is just purely friendship you had with both.

I do entirely agree with you on both points.

The code is definitely a factor where it is an actual friendship. But where it is purely a sexual type friendship anyway, would that be an issue?

I've not been in the situation so can only muse.

I can’t answer that one as not been in that position where it was a sexual friendship.

Absolutely agree. There are so many factors to be considered that chances are without being in the situation I (or anyone) might not even realise.

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

So many factors… if it’s forum based it’s largely based on who’s friends with who..

are some ladies taking sides and think he’s an arse? Do some ladies not touch men that friends have been very close to? Sometimes it can have the opposite affect.. they become desirable to some because it’s one upmanship. This place is nuts. We all know that women warn men off other ladies. Why? Fuck knows but it’s common.

I have a code amongst my few close friends. We don’t touch the same men. It just easier that way. Most of the issues with someone’s popularity comes down to the fickle friendships that are largely for show combined with jealousy.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"So many factors… if it’s forum based it’s largely based on who’s friends with who..

I have the same code with my close friends! Thank fuck others do, sometimes I think we must be slightly odd.

And I agree with a lot of the points in your post.

I do think that when a man is no longer part of a couple people might be wary? Men tend not to think so much so the woman is fair game but women? Women think a lot. You don't want to tread on toes. Get involved in drama. Pick sides. There are a myriad of reasons why it happens and not all of them are right but people act in the way they think is best for/suits them.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"So many factors… if it’s forum based it’s largely based on who’s friends with who..

So right. On all counts. Including the code (that reminds me, I still have to nag you for that list of horses

)

I think the reasons behind it when something is forum based are definitely easier to spot. It's when the forum isn't a factor that it becomes a murkier situation. And in that case I think it goes to show how far reaching connections are in this community even without the common ground of the forum.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"So many factors… if it’s forum based it’s largely based on who’s friends with who..

I have the same code with my close friends! Thank fuck others do, sometimes I think we must be slightly odd.

And I agree with a lot of the points in your post.

Absolutely so. And people always will act as they think best suits them. It's just a shame that it can affect one half of an ex couple so differently from the other.

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

"So many factors… if it’s forum based it’s largely based on who’s friends with who..

I have the same code with my close friends! Thank fuck others do, sometimes I think we must be slightly odd.

And I agree with a lot of the points in your post.

Never will I fall out over a man

life’s so simple when people communicate. If it’s nothing to do with me it’s irrelevant… the quiet life continues!!

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I would like to point out..... this really isn't a personal to me situation..... but has been for people I know and that's what has made me wonder.

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

"So many factors… if it’s forum based it’s largely based on who’s friends with who..

So right. On all counts. Including the code (that reminds me, I still have to nag you for that list of horses

)

If the forums weren’t involved I’d be oblivious so happy as Larry! I like people my friends don’t like (not just a fancy men thing) and I’m sure vice versa.. my actions won’t be defined by others opinions which is why I keep my circle small. Can’t be arsed with being offended on behalf of someone else. I’ll talk to who I like and avoid those that have directly pissed me off.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"So many factors… if it’s forum based it’s largely based on who’s friends with who..

So right. On all counts. Including the code (that reminds me, I still have to nag you for that list of horses

)

You've got exactly the right attitude in my opinion..... you do you and let them do them.

Makes the world a better place that does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Threads like this make me feel fortunate that I've only ever been here as a single and never been part of an extended friendship group

My life is very simple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I guess it could depend on why the couple split up, if known, and maybe on what kind of meets they had. If they did a lot of MMF meets, for example, or bi MFF meets, or if they only played together.

Either way, a guy who is out of a couple and now on here as single will have the single guy effect to deal with. "

I have to agree here, it will depend on their Fabs experience, but ultimately yes he will have the single guy effect to deal with.

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Threads like this make me feel fortunate that I've only ever been here as a single and never been part of an extended friendship group

My life is very simple"

Can we still have coffee and cake though?

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By *otSoPosh OP Woman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I guess it could depend on why the couple split up, if known, and maybe on what kind of meets they had. If they did a lot of MMF meets, for example, or bi MFF meets, or if they only played together.

Either way, a guy who is out of a couple and now on here as single will have the single guy effect to deal with.

I have to agree here, it will depend on their Fabs experience, but ultimately yes he will have the single guy effect to deal with."

The single guy effect is far reaching and a shame....

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

It all depends how popular he was tbh, especially if he wasn't high profile its easy to slip under the radar of most. Also some ladies have codes not to meet mates exes, some ladies also don't want to have close female friends on here for that complication, but tbf at the end of the day people are only known to be meeting if they deem to tell anyone else, lots of closed door secret liaisons happen all the time on here with the resulting fall outs when someone twigs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Threads like this make me feel fortunate that I've only ever been here as a single and never been part of an extended friendship group

My life is very simple

Can we still have coffee and cake though?

Course we can

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