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Bi married but she doesn't know

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By *zzieswuk18 OP   Man
over a year ago

Torbay

Just putting this out there as I feel there are more in this situation, for comments, opinions and should there be a bi married she doesn't know group.

Married for 25+ years amazing sex life until about 5 years ago now dead.

Bi curious 15 years ago no longer curious lol

No intention of leaving the wife BUT do so enjoy another cock and the fun that goes with it and would love a regular fwb or multiples of who know the situation.

She doesn't know and would go ballistic if she found out.

So.

1. Is it cheating?

2. Why do some people find this hard to get their head around and therefore won't meet?

3. Is there a need for a Skype, kik or WhatsApp group where people in the same situation can chat and arrange meets fully aware of the situation?

Just a Monday morning thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1. Yes

2. 2 - see answer 1

3. No

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1. Of course it's not cheating. It's just fucking around without her consent. You are allowed to fuck whoever you want, she doesn't matter.

2. Because they are horrible people. You need a fuck and they should fuck you no matter what. You are entitled to fuck anyone and everyone.

3. Set one up. Bi married cheating men need ways to fuck around and wank about it in between all the fucking. That is all they exist for. What other purpose could they have?

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By *igBanMan
over a year ago

kidlington


"1. Of course it's not cheating. It's just fucking around without her consent. You are allowed to fuck whoever you want, she doesn't matter.

2. Because they are horrible people. You need a fuck and they should fuck you no matter what. You are entitled to fuck anyone and everyone.

3. Set one up. Bi married cheating men need ways to fuck around and wank about it in between all the fucking. That is all they exist for. What other purpose could they have?"

Not sure if sarcasm or sarcasm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1 yes it’s cheating

2 because people don’t want someone’s wife turning up on they door step shouting to the world about how I or anyone been banging her husband all because he’s left fab loged in or what ever I don’t need other people worry’s in my life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1. Yes of course it is

2. Some will consider you a dickhead for doing it

3. Here and fabguys are just such groups.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1. Yes - fucking men behind your wife's back is cheating. How would it not be?!

2. Everyone has a choice as to who they want to meet, and most here avoid married/attached folk due to the associated drama. Trust and integrity is key in this scene and people cheating on unsuspecting partners don't really score highly on the trust and honesty scale.

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By *tue555Man
over a year ago

Passed Beyond Reach

1. Only if its a guy

2. People love to judge gives a feel good factor

3. Probably but best not come into the Forums and discuss you'll only get burned.

Good luck OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"1. Only if its a guy

2. People love to judge gives a feel good factor

3. Probably but best not come into the Forums and discuss you'll only get burned.

Good luck OP "

You mean people will tell him him the truth and not what he wants to hear.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

1. Is it cheating?

Has there been a pandemic ?

2. Why do some people find this hard to get their head around and therefore won't meet?

If I saw a tumble drier with safety warnings in a language I cannot read - i'm still savvy enough not to get in and close the door behind me. The fact that the words mean nothing to me is not related to my actions...... it's just STUPID to get in the tumble drier.

3. Is there a need for a Skype, kik or WhatsApp group where people in the same situation can chat and arrange meets fully aware of the situation?

On E -bay people go to the bag section for a bag. They don't buy the bag though because the don't like it. They do get the chance to look at an awful lot of bags though and maybe the odds of finding a bag they like are higher if they look in the bag section ..... so it helps..... Unlike H and M

Just a Monday morning thought.

It's Tuesday tomorrow. Let's know if you are still 'thinking' about it.

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By *ave1963BarnsleyMan
over a year ago

Barnsley


"1. Yes - fucking men behind your wife's back is cheating. How would it not be?!

2. Everyone has a choice as to who they want to meet, and most here avoid married/attached folk due to the associated drama. Trust and integrity is key in this scene and people cheating on unsuspecting partners don't really score highly on the trust and honesty scale.

"

100% what Missholdups said. If others want to engage with people cheating that's their responsibility but it's not for me.

Not only do I dislike the dishonesty and secrecy, I also don't need the drama if the partner finds out.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Are you absolutely sure she doesn't know?

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Yes it's cheating,

People don't find it hard to get their heads around it op, some just don't want to be part of it, me included.

Just remember actions have consequences and be prepared to deal with them if your wife finds out about this.

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By *urvyBi-84Man
over a year ago

Lancs

Yes, it is cheating. Some people won’t get involved in this because they don’t want the drama and the risk of angry partners / spouses banging on the door.

As for a specific group, if you think there should be one then set it up, but be prepared for a shit-show if it gets discovered.

Rather than risking all of that, if you are determined to do this then why not go to a gay sauna? Plenty of gay/bi/curious guys there and probably a fair few in the same position as you.

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By *andsome HandMan
over a year ago

roundabout

1. Yes

2. Refer to 1

3. Possibly

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

You seem very smug and proud of yourself. Yes it is cheating. If I were married I think I would be more upset to find out that my husband was cheating with other men rather than women. I feel sorry for your wife.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It's cheating, as you've no agreement on having sex outside of the relationship.

Everyone has preferences, so you need to decide your own and find others who match.

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

You might think she doesn't know, but she might have a very good idea, or she may have known for years, and also by exploring her own avenues of pleasure.

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics.

Be*

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

So you're living your life harbouring a massive secret from your wife and not living life as the 'real you'. That must be one hell of a burden.

You owe it to your wife,and yourself, to be totally honest.

Tell your wife. If she loves you she will listen and try her hardest to understand and find a solution that works for you both.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London


"1. Is it cheating?

Has there been a pandemic ?

2. Why do some people find this hard to get their head around and therefore won't meet?

If I saw a tumble drier with safety warnings in a language I cannot read - i'm still savvy enough not to get in and close the door behind me. The fact that the words mean nothing to me is not related to my actions...... it's just STUPID to get in the tumble drier.

3. Is there a need for a Skype, kik or WhatsApp group where people in the same situation can chat and arrange meets fully aware of the situation?

On E -bay people go to the bag section for a bag. They don't buy the bag though because the don't like it. They do get the chance to look at an awful lot of bags though and maybe the odds of finding a bag they like are higher if they look in the bag section ..... so it helps..... Unlike H and M

Just a Monday morning thought.

It's Tuesday tomorrow. Let's know if you are still 'thinking' about it."

That's deep for a Monday morning.

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By *tue555Man
over a year ago

Passed Beyond Reach


"You might think she doesn't know, but she might have a very good idea, or she may have known for years, and also by exploring her own avenues of pleasure."

She may well be, but is that any different than the OP was asking, because she's a woman?

Not sure women would react the same way to get cheating? with a guy unless she had strong personal views on male bisexuality or homosexuality- think there is more understanding -

women do have fragile egos as well as men - to be cheated? on with another guy rather than another woman would be less damaging to that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd say it's cheating. Please don't do it. You'll thank yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I appreciate the honesty by posting this OP.

If you can't be honest here about your sexuality where can you be?

Keyboard critics be damned with their pontificating opinions as they're not in your shoes or know your situation.

Is it right what you're doing?

That's a daft question really, ofcourse it isn't.

I'm not here to judge though, just to answer the question.

As far as this thread goes (and the general vibe I get is folks are calling you out for being a liar to your missus). I bet every single person poster has told a fib at some point in their lives.

Filtered photos on your profile? A fib.

Telling everyone you're straight when you're bi? A fib.

Safe sex all the way? It didn't matter in the club last night with that fit guy/girl. A fib.

I could go on.....

The point I'm making to the judgmental pontificators is we all tell lies, ALL OF US at some point.

Just answer the question, no need to judge.

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By *tue555Man
over a year ago

Passed Beyond Reach

Poster ^^^^ above is correct it is no-one else's business but your as my earlier post. People are judgemental and hypocritical and sanctimonious about such matters, very fluid with their viewpoint when it suits without any knowledge of the facts. Guy raises this in the forums he gets burned, woman get sympathy and support for it?

It can be very difficult to to discuss the matter with your partner but people forget that, Its not always black and white, but here the Forum jurists would rather shoot first than ask questions and understand - well if its a guy that is.

I am have experience of such an issue but the reverse, so I know how difficult it can be to approach a partner about such matters.

Forum is for discussing such matters (not) but only if you have boobs and a foof

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham


"Poster ^^^^ above is correct it is no-one else's business but your as my earlier post. People are judgemental and hypocritical and sanctimonious about such matters, very fluid with their viewpoint when it suits without any knowledge of the facts. Guy raises this in the forums he gets burned, woman get sympathy and support for it?

It can be very difficult to to discuss the matter with your partner but people forget that, Its not always black and white, but here the Forum jurists would rather shoot first than ask questions and understand - well if its a guy that is.

I am have experience of such an issue but the reverse, so I know how difficult it can be to approach a partner about such matters.

Forum is for discussing such matters (not) but only if you have boobs and a foof"

Women don't get sympathy and support. I know of women who have been bullied and hounded off the forums.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit


"Poster ^^^^ above is correct it is no-one else's business but your as my earlier post. People are judgemental and hypocritical and sanctimonious about such matters, very fluid with their viewpoint when it suits without any knowledge of the facts. Guy raises this in the forums he gets burned, woman get sympathy and support for it?

It can be very difficult to to discuss the matter with your partner but people forget that, Its not always black and white, but here the Forum jurists would rather shoot first than ask questions and understand - well if its a guy that is.

I am have experience of such an issue but the reverse, so I know how difficult it can be to approach a partner about such matters.

Forum is for discussing such matters (not) but only if you have boobs and a foof"

It wouldn't be peoples business if it hadn't been posted on here, asking for opinions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Poster ^^^^ above is correct it is no-one else's business but your as my earlier post. People are judgemental and hypocritical and sanctimonious about such matters, very fluid with their viewpoint when it suits without any knowledge of the facts. Guy raises this in the forums he gets burned, woman get sympathy and support for it?

It can be very difficult to to discuss the matter with your partner but people forget that, Its not always black and white, but here the Forum jurists would rather shoot first than ask questions and understand - well if its a guy that is.

I am have experience of such an issue but the reverse, so I know how difficult it can be to approach a partner about such matters.

Forum is for discussing such matters (not) but only if you have boobs and a foof

Women don't get sympathy and support. I know of women who have been bullied and hounded off the forums."

I know of men who were bullied and hounded off here too!

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

1. Yes

2. Because a lot of people won’t meet cheats and I understand why. A lot will though so it’s finding the right person.

3. I don’t do groups so not sure but maybe worth a try although not sure you can advertise groups on here so not sure how you’d go about it.

4. You can ask for opinions but you and only you can make these decisions.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"1. Is it cheating?

Has there been a pandemic ?

2. Why do some people find this hard to get their head around and therefore won't meet?

If I saw a tumble drier with safety warnings in a language I cannot read - i'm still savvy enough not to get in and close the door behind me. The fact that the words mean nothing to me is not related to my actions...... it's just STUPID to get in the tumble drier.

3. Is there a need for a Skype, kik or WhatsApp group where people in the same situation can chat and arrange meets fully aware of the situation?

On E -bay people go to the bag section for a bag. They don't buy the bag though because the don't like it. They do get the chance to look at an awful lot of bags though and maybe the odds of finding a bag they like are higher if they look in the bag section ..... so it helps..... Unlike H and M

Just a Monday morning thought.

It's Tuesday tomorrow. Let's know if you are still 'thinking' about it.

That's deep for a Monday morning. "

Bit like a tombola barrel when your four .....

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I appreciate the honesty by posting this OP.

If you can't be honest here about your sexuality where can you be?

Keyboard critics be damned with their pontificating opinions as they're not in your shoes or know your situation.

Is it right what you're doing?

That's a daft question really, ofcourse it isn't.

I'm not here to judge though, just to answer the question.

As far as this thread goes (and the general vibe I get is folks are calling you out for being a liar to your missus). I bet every single person poster has told a fib at some point in their lives.

Filtered photos on your profile? A fib.

Telling everyone you're straight when you're bi? A fib.

Safe sex all the way? It didn't matter in the club last night with that fit guy/girl. A fib.

I could go on.....

The point I'm making to the judgmental pontificators is we all tell lies, ALL OF US at some point.

Just answer the question, no need to judge.

"

I agree. You shouldn't judge.

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By *tue555Man
over a year ago

Passed Beyond Reach


"Poster ^^^^ above is correct it is no-one else's business but your as my earlier post. People are judgemental and hypocritical and sanctimonious about such matters, very fluid with their viewpoint when it suits without any knowledge of the facts. Guy raises this in the forums he gets burned, woman get sympathy and support for it?

It can be very difficult to to discuss the matter with your partner but people forget that, Its not always black and white, but here the Forum jurists would rather shoot first than ask questions and understand - well if its a guy that is.

I am have experience of such an issue but the reverse, so I know how difficult it can be to approach a partner about such matters.

Forum is for discussing such matters (not) but only if you have boobs and a foof

Women don't get sympathy and support. I know of women who have been bullied and hounded off the forums."

Oh I know they have !!!! For as simple as being disliked by another forumite - forum mob rule - but it happens very rarely if ever in such as the above cases.

As I said FAB attitudes are very flexible when it comes to gender.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham


"Poster ^^^^ above is correct it is no-one else's business but your as my earlier post. People are judgemental and hypocritical and sanctimonious about such matters, very fluid with their viewpoint when it suits without any knowledge of the facts. Guy raises this in the forums he gets burned, woman get sympathy and support for it?

It can be very difficult to to discuss the matter with your partner but people forget that, Its not always black and white, but here the Forum jurists would rather shoot first than ask questions and understand - well if its a guy that is.

I am have experience of such an issue but the reverse, so I know how difficult it can be to approach a partner about such matters.

Forum is for discussing such matters (not) but only if you have boobs and a foof

Women don't get sympathy and support. I know of women who have been bullied and hounded off the forums.

I know of men who were bullied and hounded off here too!"

So do I. People will bully, regardless of gender.

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