FabSwingers.com forum: Milk! Its getting ridiculous!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As a kid we had 1 pint bottles with green tops on, it was good for you, they even gave you half pints at school to help you grow! THEN it went all shit shaped!

What happened? Well we got silver top as pasteurised was supposed to be better! Then fuck me man Milk then started coming with blue and green tops! The green stuff was fake and the blue ok. Next thing was we got red top which is devils piss if you ask me but all the bod freaks love it.

Today I go to Tescos and fuck me they have orange top bottles now! Which are unleaded or something! I have just had enough. There are so many different white milks before you get to the strawberry, banana and chocolate milk!!! Jesus man Milk should be what comes out of the frickin cow not all this pissing about with it stuff!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As a kid we had 1 pint bottles with green tops on, it was good for you, they even gave you half pints at school to help you grow! THEN it went all shit shaped!

Do you apply the same logic to all consumables, that variety is a bad thing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not forgetting Goat's milk either

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

lmao! I personally dont like milk, if I do need it (occoaionally a dribble on cereal), it has to be red as its like water!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Those bulls don't fill many bottles and take some milking!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

very true muncher

milk is milk and all the different types you get are getting a little pathetic now

kids need full fat heavy duty MILK

My son drinks about half to one pint a day as he needs it for his bones to strengthen them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Used to love Red Top as a kid

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Blue = 10% fat

Green = 2% fat

Orange/Purple = 1% fat

Red = 0.1% fat

Shame you can't get gold top any more. And damn homogenisation. Me and my sisters used to fight over the cream at the top of the bottle for our cereal.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Blue = 10% fat

Green = 2% fat

Orange/Purple = 1% fat

Red = 0.1% fat

Shame you can't get gold top any more. And damn homogenisation. Me and my sisters used to fight over the cream at the top of the bottle for our cereal."

Where the fuck did they start doing purple ones?

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Blue = 10% fat

Green = 2% fat

Orange/Purple = 1% fat

Red = 0.1% fat

Shame you can't get gold top any more. And damn homogenisation. Me and my sisters used to fight over the cream at the top of the bottle for our cereal.

Where the fuck did they start doing purple ones?

Morrisons. It's the same as the Sainsbos orange top.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

different types of milk

they are =

whole milk

semi-skimmed milk

skimmed milk

1% fat

Organic milk

Jersey and Gernsey milk

Flavoured Milk

Heat treated milk=

sterilised milk

UHT milk

pastuerised

evaporated milk

condensed milk

untreated (raw) milk

Filtered milks

dried milk powder

not sure if i missed any

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

Do you remember the days when it was really cold and the cream would freeze like a popsicle and burst through the foil!!

We used to fight over that bit

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"different types of milk

they are =

whole milk

semi-skimmed milk

skimmed milk

1% fat

Organic milk

Jersey and Gernsey milk

Flavoured Milk

Heat treated milk=

sterilised milk

UHT milk

pastuerised

evaporated milk

condensed milk

untreated (raw) milk

Filtered milks

dried milk powder

not sure if i missed any

Soy milk, almond milk, rice milk....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Blue = 10% fat

Green = 2% fat

Orange/Purple = 1% fat

Red = 0.1% fat

Shame you can't get gold top any more. And damn homogenisation. Me and my sisters used to fight over the cream at the top of the bottle for our cereal."

Me and my sister too!! it gave you a smashing tache didnt it lol!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I seldom drink milk on its own, and when I do I prefer full fat or even gold top.

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"different types of milk

they are =

whole milk

semi-skimmed milk

skimmed milk

1% fat

Organic milk

Jersey and Gernsey milk

Flavoured Milk

Heat treated milk=

sterilised milk

UHT milk

pastuerised

evaporated milk

condensed milk

untreated (raw) milk

Filtered milks

dried milk powder

not sure if i missed any

Soy milk, almond milk, rice milk...."

Chocolate Oat milk

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"Blue = 10% fat

Green = 2% fat

Orange/Purple = 1% fat

Red = 0.1% fat

Shame you can't get gold top any more. And damn homogenisation. Me and my sisters used to fight over the cream at the top of the bottle for our cereal.

Me and my sister too!! it gave you a smashing tache didnt it lol!!!

Only if the blue-tits hadn't got there first!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't forget the best milk of all.......

breast

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you remember the days when it was really cold and the cream would freeze like a popsicle and burst through the foil!!

We used to fight over that bit

I remember getting the milk and the birds had always pecked at it

them birds get everyway

a peck here and a peck there all adds up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when we lived in devon - we often went to a little posh organic farm shop that sold organic full cream at the top of the bottle fat milk.. it was fooking lovely..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I go for the green with everything. On cereal and in drinks.

Blue in tea tastes wrong, though its not bad in coffee, but buying a type of milk just for coffee when green tastes fine in it anyway would be like buying an umbrella for a jolly in the canaries "just in case".

And red tastes like the water you fill a used cereal bowl with to steep it. No, ta.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

used to milk herd of cows before going to school...proper milk...stopped drinking milk when they started screwing with it...

used to be able to drink a glass from the cow and scrape the cream fat from the inside of my mouth...proper milk!

was in china last may....first time since i was 12 i tasted proper milk

perfect!!!!!!!

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By *oole2010Couple
over a year ago

southampto

after working in the dairy industry for many years,the blue you get in the supermarket is practically homogenised.

every milk you buy apart from full fat obviously is a byproduct after they have taken the cream and the cheese out, the red milk you get now they used to feed to the pigs as it was no good after the cheese process,

then all the keep fit fanatics jumped on it and they make a fortune !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"after working in the dairy industry for many years,the blue you get in the supermarket is practically homogenised.

then all the keep fit fanatics jumped on it and they make a fortune !!!!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"different types of milk

they are =

whole milk

semi-skimmed milk

skimmed milk

1% fat

Organic milk

Jersey and Gernsey milk

Flavoured Milk

Heat treated milk=

sterilised milk

UHT milk

pastuerised

evaporated milk

condensed milk

untreated (raw) milk

Filtered milks

dried milk powder

not sure if i missed any

Soy milk, almond milk, rice milk....

Chocolate Oat milk"

Don't forget Tiger's Milk

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By *oole2010Couple
over a year ago

southampto

oops forgot to add i did drive a milk float, lol and in them days if the milk was older than three days, it was taken off the float,and tipped or given to the local pig farmer.

what i cant work out is today the dates on milk are nearly 14 days so not exactly fresh is it?, and the reason for that is its homogenised (a process where the cream is dispersed in the milk )so supermarkets dont throw so much away , in the olden days it would really only be sold to cafes.

im afraid the only way to get fresh milk is off your milkman where they still have the strict guidelines i believe.

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By * starr -Woman
over a year ago

Burton on Trent.

i am by no means a fit freak but like the red top, blue is far too creamy for me, but i do agree, kids should have the full fat stuff whilst growing.

and i love the list of diff milks, didnt realise there were so many!

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By *he Original TTMan
over a year ago

Brackley, Northants

"Blue = 10% fat

Green = 2% fat

Orange/Purple = 1% fat

Red = 0.1% fat

Shame you can't get gold top any more. And damn homogenisation. Me and my sisters used to fight over the cream at the top of the bottle for our cereal.

Where the fuck did they start doing purple ones?

Morrisons. It's the same as the Sainsbos orange top."

Tesco also do 2 purple top ones - a light purple (semi skimmed - same as green top) and an EVER so slightly darker one (Full fat - same as blue top)

Both are together in the milk section, often in the same 'cage' and can be SOOO easily confused!!!

They are in their 'value brands' range and only come in the 4 pint size (mind you, it is cheaper than the 'standard' milk and tastes exactly the same!)

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By *ornieandhotCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

I miss it can't do dairy anymore

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"oops forgot to add i did drive a milk float, lol and in them days if the milk was older than three days, it was taken off the float,and tipped or given to the local pig farmer.

im afraid the only way to get fresh milk is off your milkman where they still have the strict guidelines i believe.

What a woman milk float driver! I am well impressed

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

i quite like idea of being milked

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

Milk? It's what Ian Rush drinks.. Ian Rush? Yeah, and he said if I drink lots of milk, I'll be good enough to play for Accrington Stanley. Accrington Stanley, who are they? Exactly!

Sorry, cant help myself when I hear milk..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Red top just reminds me of the water left in the sink after washing cheap vinyl emulsion out of your paintbrush.

But less tasty.

On a cheerier note, you cant beat evaporated milk on a nice bit of swiss roll (guess who is a child of the '70's

) or some condensed milk in a proper cup of freshly brewed coffee*

* not instant. Thats just a waste.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No wonder the milkmen quit with so many chances to make a mistake.

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By *aceytopWoman
over a year ago

from a town near you

and dont forget the milk of human kindness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Milk? It's what Ian Rush drinks.. Ian Rush? Yeah, and he said if I drink lots of milk, I'll be good enough to play for Accrington Stanley. Accrington Stanley, who are they? Exactly!

Sorry, cant help myself when I hear milk..

I loved that advert and now got it in me head

As for milk don't like the stuff so don't care what colour tops are

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By *he Original TTMan
over a year ago

Brackley, Northants

Watch out, watch out, there's a Humphrey about...

(Showing my age now! Lol!)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Watch out, watch out, there's a Humphrey about...

(Showing my age now! Lol!)

Bet you use blue for tubbiecustard!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't forget the best milk of all.......

breast

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Actually we are the only mammals that drink milk after infancy,,, we don't need it

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By *he Original TTMan
over a year ago

Brackley, Northants

"Watch out, watch out, there's a Humphrey about...

(Showing my age now! Lol!)

Bet you use blue for tubbiecustard!

Nah, too creamy! Prefer a semi...skimmed. Lol!

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"No wonder the milkmen quit with so many chances to make a mistake. "

My milkman makes ice cream! The milk he delivers is from his own farm and this was his way of avoiding having to sell his surplus to supermarkets.

There are still a few in business selling their own milk (just realised how icky last sentence sounds, I mean the milk from his own herd

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"lmao! I personally dont like milk, if I do need it (occoaionally a dribble on cereal), it has to be red as its like water!

Red top is like sticking your face under a drainpipe and drinking what comes out of it. Yuk!

Blue: too creamy

Green: just right.

I miss the old foil topped glass bottles though, for some reason they always seemed fresher.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The winter days when I was a kid and the milk would freeze out of the bottle and the blue tits would be pecking at it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The winter days when I was a kid and the milk would freeze out of the bottle and the blue tits would be pecking at it

...and if you ran out of milk in the morning you only had to pop next door and nick theirs off the doorstep.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/09/12 04:13:12]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The winter days when I was a kid and the milk would freeze out of the bottle and the blue tits would be pecking at it

...and if you ran out of milk in the morning you only had to pop next door and nick theirs off the doorstep.

Used to swap the pecked bottles for freshuns

Worst was catching the cat chewing ok the popsicle

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

When we where kids we had it straight from the cow in a metal churn. I used to help my grandad milk the cows. We had our share before it went off in the tanker. Think something changed and you werent supposed ot have it straight from the cow, ive never drank milk but used to help my grandma make, cream, cheese and butter with the top of the milk. I was quite handy when i was a kid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to work with a farm inspector and she would tell horror stories about some dairies

Funnily enough she would only drink UHT

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh, you can milk just about anything with nipples.

I have nipples, Greg, could you milk me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh - and for all you milk officianados - if you think you really 'know your milk'

Google 'b3ta man milk moo milk' - play the game and see just how good your eyesight is!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, you can milk just about anything with nipples.

I have nipples, Greg, could you milk me?

Yes but I wouldn't be using your nipples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Actually we are the only mammals that drink milk after infancy,,, we don't need it

More than that, we're actually not designed to digest milk from cows.

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By *damandeve4funCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

Don't forget that it has now been shown that milk (and other forms of dairy) is not very good for you. Also, that the calcium benefits were largely a myth. Give up dairy and there will be less heart disease, cancer and obesity.

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By *damandeve4funCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Actually we are the only mammals that drink milk after infancy,,, we don't need it

More than that, we're actually not designed to digest milk from cows."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Milk? It's what Ian Rush drinks.. Ian Rush? Yeah, and he said if I drink lots of milk, I'll be good enough to play for Accrington Stanley. Accrington Stanley, who are they? Exactly!

Sorry, cant help myself when I hear milk..

I loved that advert and now got it in me head

As for milk don't like the stuff so don't care what colour tops are

Strange to think the young lad in it is now a thirty-something stand-up comedian...

He's alright too, I've heard.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Drink breast, it's the best

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Actually we are the only mammals that drink milk after infancy,,, we don't need it

More than that, we're actually not designed to digest milk from cows.

If we didn't digest it we wouldn't get the calcium from it and after drinking it our pee would be cloudy white too.

Think you've watched snatch too many times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Actually we are the only mammals that drink milk after infancy,,, we don't need it

More than that, we're actually not designed to digest milk from cows.

If we didn't digest it we wouldn't get the calcium from it and after drinking it our pee would be cloudy white too.

Think you've watched snatch too many times

You need to do a bit more research.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Today I go to Tescos and fuck me they have orange top bottles now! Which are unleaded or something! "

So..... I take it you didn't spot the purple top ones then......???

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By *he Original TTMan
over a year ago

Brackley, Northants

"Today I go to Tescos and fuck me they have orange top bottles now! Which are unleaded or something!

So..... I take it you didn't spot the purple top ones then......???

2 different colours (but only just!) too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and lactose free, and almond milk and soya milk and hazlenut milk and it'll be freakin mother's milk next ... little frozen sachet's of breast milk and colostrum and super high prices to boost your immunity!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"and lactose free, and almond milk and soya milk and hazlenut milk and it'll be freakin mother's milk next ... little frozen sachet's of breast milk and colostrum and super high prices to boost your immunity!

Thought they already did that in Waitrose....?

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

Thought they already did that in Waitrose....?

So where do all our Olympians get the colostrum they supplement their protein shakes with?

(and yes, I am aware it's not human colostrum)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a farmer's daughter, we used to wake up every morning with churn sitting on the table full of milk straight from the cow, and on occasions it was still warm (YUK YUK YUK) as you can see i hated it but it never did us any harm. The farmers are now not allowed to give milk away like that anymore as it has to go through many proceeds to make it right for the individual. I love the Semi-skimmed tastes just right on my cereals...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Actually we are the only mammals that drink milk after infancy,,, we don't need it

More than that, we're actually not designed to digest milk from cows.

If we didn't digest it we wouldn't get the calcium from it and after drinking it our pee would be cloudy white too.

Think you've watched snatch too many times

You need to do a bit more research."

Lol why would I want to research milk? It's white an tastes nice on me porridge

That's about all I need too know

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By *ricky_DickyMan
over a year ago

Mirfield

"As a farmer's daughter, we used to wake up every morning with churn sitting on the table full of milk straight from the cow, and on occasions it was still warm (YUK YUK YUK) as you can see i hated it but it never did us any harm. The farmers are now not allowed to give milk away like that anymore as it has to go through many proceeds to make it right for the individual. I love the Semi-skimmed tastes just right on my cereals...

You can still get raw milk, only thing done to it is filtered, chilled and bottled. Upon till a couple of months ago thats all we ever got till the farm we got if from decided to send all it's milk out to be processed. It is getting harder to find which is a shame, I don't mind paying extra for it to support dairy farmers rather than have the supermarkets screw the price down to the floor

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By *ub bbwWoman
over a year ago

oldbury

"different types of milk

they are =

whole milk

semi-skimmed milk

skimmed milk

1% fat

Organic milk

Jersey and Gernsey milk

Flavoured Milk

Heat treated milk=

sterilised milk

UHT milk

pastuerised

evaporated milk

condensed milk

untreated (raw) milk

Filtered milks

dried milk powder

not sure if i missed any

Soy milk, almond milk, rice milk...."
lactofree milk available in green and blue too its real milk with the enzymes removed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thought they already did that in Waitrose....?

Are they still making breast milk ice cream ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Actually we are the only mammals that drink milk after infancy,,, we don't need it

More than that, we're actually not designed to digest milk from cows.

If we didn't digest it we wouldn't get the calcium from it and after drinking it our pee would be cloudy white too.

Think you've watched snatch too many times

You need to do a bit more research.

Lol why would I want to research milk? It's white an tastes nice on me porridge

That's about all I need too know

Because you made a totally incorrect claim.

Humans are not designed to digest milk from cows.

If you believe that not to be the case, you need to do more research.

Or you could stay poorly informed and wrong.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Rice, almond, oats... how on earth are they being milked? None of them have nipples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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