FabSwingers.com forum: Pushy and disrespectful

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Two terms we see banded about on here quite a bit.

So, what to you, is pushy ?

and what, to you, is disrespectful ?

In swinging terms of course !

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By *tomComMan
over a year ago

Wellingborough

"Two terms we see banded about on here quite a bit.

So, what to you, is pushy ?

and what, to you, is disrespectful ?

In swinging terms of course !"

Can I add the following question

Are these terms that are only really thrown out at single men ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Two terms we see banded about on here quite a bit.

So, what to you, is pushy ?

and what, to you, is disrespectful ?

In swinging terms of course !

Can I add the following question

Are these terms that are only really thrown out at single men ?"

Not at all

It was a question in general as I have seen it levelled at couples by other couples too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Two terms we see banded about on here quite a bit.

So, what to you, is pushy ?

and what, to you, is disrespectful ?

In swinging terms of course !

Can I add the following question

Are these terms that are only really thrown out at single men ?"

Hell no they go out to everyone...lol ..

Pushy to me is someone who doesn't take your answer as an answer...a polite no thanks then turns into a why not...then a your just stuck up...lol...I don't repeat myself lol

Disrespectful is when you give the message a response and its obviously not what they wanted to hear and get abusive....

Its definately not restricted to single men...some of the politest people I speak to on here are single guys...everyone can be rude and disrespectful in their own ways...just glad to know its not all directed at once...lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

good topic ....

So, what to you, is pushy ?

"someone who doesnt know when to take no for an answer"

and what, to you, is disrespectful ?

" a person who does not take time to actually read your profile then asks an inaapropriate question"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pushy ... not taking a polite no for an answer, coming on way strong from the first message, getting all snotty if things don't go thier way, not understanding that we have a life outside of this with all the responsibilities that go with it which are a priority and fun comes second. Oh and tossing around the all to oft used phrases 'time waster' and 'not genuine' just because it's not happeneing at thier speed.

Disrespectful ... not treating you like a fellow human being who has thier own wants, needs , desires and fantsies.

Don't know if it's only single men that get branded with these but I've had some couples and ladies who've been very 'pushy' and 'disrespectful'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pushy includes:

Messaging every 2 days about meeting when they've been told yes, but it'll be a while before I have the time.

Trying to persuade you that you don't actually mean no.

Trying to persuade you to change/reduce/drop completely your rules or limits, or just ignoring them altogether.

Demanding photos, phone numbers etc.

Disrespectful includes:

First messages that are down right rude.

If given a phone number for a chat, to verify you're a woman/couple etc, abusing that and calling/texting when they shouldn't be.

Expecting that because you've done something, or enjoy something, you'll automatically do it with them.

Failing to respect that people have families and private lives away from FAB.

Not reading a profile and sending a message even if totally not what the person is looking for.

Automatically expecting the other person to host, especially with the attitude 'you host because I won't shit on my own doorstep'.

Saying idiotic, cuntastic things like 'you only think you're Domme because you've not met the right man yet'.

And no, it's not just single men who do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pushy includes:

Messaging every 2 days about meeting when they've been told yes, but it'll be a while before I have the time.

Trying to persuade you that you don't actually mean no.

Trying to persuade you to change/reduce/drop completely your rules or limits, or just ignoring them altogether.

Demanding photos, phone numbers etc.

Disrespectful includes:

First messages that are down right rude.

If given a phone number for a chat, to verify you're a woman/couple etc, abusing that and calling/texting when they shouldn't be.

Expecting that because you've done something, or enjoy something, you'll automatically do it with them.

Failing to respect that people have families and private lives away from FAB.

Not reading a profile and sending a message even if totally not what the person is looking for.

Automatically expecting the other person to host, especially with the attitude 'you host because I won't shit on my own doorstep'.

Saying idiotic, cuntastic things like 'you only think you're Domme because you've not met the right man yet'.

And no, it's not just single men who do it.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

For me it's messages along the lines - "change your preferences and meet me", or after a meet has been arranged every time I log on I'm bombarded with messages.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Pushy includes:

Messaging every 2 days about meeting when they've been told yes, but it'll be a while before I have the time.

Trying to persuade you that you don't actually mean no.

Trying to persuade you to change/reduce/drop completely your rules or limits, or just ignoring them altogether.

Demanding photos, phone numbers etc.

Disrespectful includes:

First messages that are down right rude.

If given a phone number for a chat, to verify you're a woman/couple etc, abusing that and calling/texting when they shouldn't be.

Expecting that because you've done something, or enjoy something, you'll automatically do it with them.

Failing to respect that people have families and private lives away from FAB.

Not reading a profile and sending a message even if totally not what the person is looking for.

Automatically expecting the other person to host, especially with the attitude 'you host because I won't shit on my own doorstep'.

Saying idiotic, cuntastic things like 'you only think you're Domme because you've not met the right man yet'.

And no, it's not just single men who do it.

All of the above!

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"Two terms we see banded about on here quite a bit.

So, what to you, is pushy ?

and what, to you, is disrespectful ?

In swinging terms of course !

Can I add the following question

Are these terms that are only really thrown out at single men ?"

No...infact we have come across more pushy and disrespectful couples than we have singles.

Pushy - People who won't take no for an answer or who keep on constantly pushing for a meet on a daily basis. People who try and tell us what we should do and think....

Disrespectful - All the above, plus those who only include one of us in conversations/ mails etc. People who try and push us into things that we have clearly said no too.

Could think of lots more but that will do for now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pushy ... not taking a polite no for an answer, coming on way strong from the first message, getting all snotty if things don't go thier way, not understanding that we have a life outside of this with all the responsibilities that go with it which are a priority and fun comes second. Oh and tossing around the all to oft used phrases 'time waster' and 'not genuine' just because it's not happeneing at thier speed.

Disrespectful ... not treating you like a fellow human being who has thier own wants, needs , desires and fantsies.

Don't know if it's only single men that get branded with these but I've had some couples and ladies who've been very 'pushy' and 'disrespectful'."

As with all things 'fab' - it's not the sex or marital status of the fabster that puts them into either category - just their personal beliefs, standards and general personality!!

We've all got arseholes - just some are, as well as have!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when i meet a couple, they talk to each other as if i wasnt there, they ask or tell each other what to do, without asking me what i would like to do.

men who think you will change your mind about doing things when you already said no. not everyone is like that though of course thanks goodness.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Pushy includes:

Messaging every 2 days about meeting when they've been told yes, but it'll be a while before I have the time.

Trying to persuade you that you don't actually mean no.

Trying to persuade you to change/reduce/drop completely your rules or limits, or just ignoring them altogether.

Demanding photos, phone numbers etc.

Disrespectful includes:

First messages that are down right rude.

If given a phone number for a chat, to verify you're a woman/couple etc, abusing that and calling/texting when they shouldn't be.

Expecting that because you've done something, or enjoy something, you'll automatically do it with them.

Failing to respect that people have families and private lives away from FAB.

Not reading a profile and sending a message even if totally not what the person is looking for.

Automatically expecting the other person to host, especially with the attitude 'you host because I won't shit on my own doorstep'.

Saying idiotic, cuntastic things like 'you only think you're Domme because you've not met the right man yet'.

And no, it's not just single men who do it.

All of the above and in a nutshell it is ignoring the (sometimes subtle) replies they get and insisting on their own agenda!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Two terms we see banded about on here quite a bit.

So, what to you, is pushy ?

and what, to you, is disrespectful ?

In swinging terms of course !"

Pushy: Come on then, we've messaged you once, when's the shagfest?

Diresepctful: Come on then, we've messaged you once, when's the old man out?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An example of what I would consider as pushy is for someone to keep asking me to meet him sooner when I have already informed him that I am not available until such as such a date.

An example of what I would consider as disrespectful is for someone to ask me to be available at a specific time so that he can call me, and then fails to do so without so much of a courtesy text to let me know he is not available.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pushy includes:

Messaging every 2 days about meeting when they've been told yes, but it'll be a while before I have the time.

Trying to persuade you that you don't actually mean no.

Trying to persuade you to change/reduce/drop completely your rules or limits, or just ignoring them altogether.

Demanding photos, phone numbers etc.

Disrespectful includes:

First messages that are down right rude.

If given a phone number for a chat, to verify you're a woman/couple etc, abusing that and calling/texting when they shouldn't be.

Expecting that because you've done something, or enjoy something, you'll automatically do it with them.

Failing to respect that people have families and private lives away from FAB.

Not reading a profile and sending a message even if totally not what the person is looking for.

Automatically expecting the other person to host, especially with the attitude 'you host because I won't shit on my own doorstep'.

Saying idiotic, cuntastic things like 'you only think you're Domme because you've not met the right man yet'.

And no, it's not just single men who do it.

All of those.

I haven't chatted to single women so can't comment, but single men and couples (men and women from the couples) can be pushy and/or disrespectful.

Pushy and also disrespectful- still asking for a meet even when you've said you won't be meeting for the foreseeable future.

Disrespectful- calling you out of the blue 'for a chat' when you've only met once for a coffee.

Texting you late at night.

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