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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I retired when I was 47 after working and saving like mad all my working life

Just get a family member ring up and ask if I can lend them 5 k

When I ask for what they go off on one

I think I have the right to know why they want the money

Or maybe I dont

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd always ask as well before I lent out any money regardless to the amount.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'd always ask as well before I lent out any money regardless to the amount. "

Thank you as long as I'm not the only one that thinks you have a right to know

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I don't think you have a right to know. I think you have a right to ask how and when they are going to repay it though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I retired when I was 47 after working and saving like mad all my working life

Just get a family member ring up and ask if I can lend them 5 k

When I ask for what they go off on one

I think I have the right to know why they want the money

Or maybe I dont

"

It's not always a good idea loaning family money. And yes, u think you do have a right to know - after all, applying for a loan from a company would be asking similar questions for paperwork.

If they've gone off one one because you've asked a simple question, then I'd be reluctant to loan them the money. Would you definitely get it returned under your terms?

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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

I think it is absolutely reasonable that you ask what they need the money for. The reason they need the money could influence your decision, for example, if it is to pay for essential house repairs that's very different to say paying for a luxury holiday.

The fact that they went off on one when you asked would be a huge red flag for me.

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

No need for someone to refuse an answer if they are in need of a bridging loan. It is no small amount of money really. You might have already answered them that you have it by asking 'what is it for', so maybe say you were looking at some improvements yourself.

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By *nto the LouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

There’s no right or wrong answer here - it’s your money, you should ask whatever you feel you want to ask!

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Consider if you can afford to lose £5k as you might never get it back. I speak from experience !

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I feel the same she is not getting it full stop

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

The only members of our family who have ever asked for a loan are not surprisingly our kids. They always said what they need it for without us asking. They both earn way more than us now so the boot might be on the other foot one day .

I think if you're going to lend within the family you should be prepared to never get all of it back. Some family members truly believe that if you have more than them you should give it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you have a right to know why they want the money. It's your business when they are using your money.

I'd be more inclined to lend if I knew they really needed it for something important. But if you don't trust them to give it back, then I wouldn't even go there. I'd have to have major trust in someone to lend them money. It's something I mostly avoid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never lend money to close family or friends - if I can afford it and they need it then I'll give it to them, and not worry any more about it.

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I would want to know just incase they are planning on spending the money on something that would be getting them into more debt which would them mean your chances of getting the money back are slim.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

When I lent money to my brother he told me it was for a deposit and one month's rent for a flat but he spent it on drugs and I never got it back.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I suppose it depends on how close you are. I've just given it before, no questions asked and didnt want it repaying x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it’s perfectly reasonable to ask what it’s for if they are asking for your help and to agree a plan and timeframe for it to be paid back….

Can cause difficulties lending money to family or friends, only do what you feel comfortable doing xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I would want to know just incase they are planning on spending the money on something that would be getting them into more debt which would them mean your chances of getting the money back are slim."

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I suppose it depends on how close you are. I've just given it before, no questions asked and didnt want it repaying x"

I cant loose that sort of money

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have to say I don't think you should do it Frank because you don't seem comfortable in doing so. It's your money and if you've worked hard for it and saved up do not let them make you out to be unreasonable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lender nor a borrower be, great advice passed down to me from my Grandfather.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I retired when I was 47 after working and saving like mad all my working life

Just get a family member ring up and ask if I can lend them 5 k

When I ask for what they go off on one

I think I have the right to know why they want the money

Or maybe I dont

"

Absolutely you should know , also a repayment plan

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds


"I suppose it depends on how close you are. I've just given it before, no questions asked and didnt want it repaying x

I cant loose that sort of money"

The question you should ask then is not what they want it for but how soon can they pay it back x

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By *rad670Man
over a year ago

South Lakes

I only ever lend money to either of my daughters who rarely ask or my brother who I never feel the need to know what it's for but I have total trust in all three, risky business really.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I suppose it depends on how close you are. I've just given it before, no questions asked and didnt want it repaying x

I cant loose that sort of money"

Don't lend it then

Interest rates are very low at the moment they could go to a bank or building society.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I suppose it depends on how close you are. I've just given it before, no questions asked and didnt want it repaying x

I cant loose that sort of money

Don't lend it then

Interest rates are very low at the moment they could go to a bank or building society. "

She can't go to the bank how

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Now

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By *ilfCrumpet9Man
over a year ago

Wirral

Don't do it mate unless you want to just give it to them and forget about it. Done myself in the tune of thousands never got it back. Friends and family never unless you want to fall out with them

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"

She can't go to the bank "

Why not ?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I suppose it depends on how close you are. I've just given it before, no questions asked and didnt want it repaying x

I cant loose that sort of money

Don't lend it then

Interest rates are very low at the moment they could go to a bank or building society.

She can't go to the bank how "

With internet banking you can go to the bank 24/7.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

She can't go to the bank

Why not ?"

You have to ask her husband that question

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"

She can't go to the bank

Why not ?

You have to ask her husband that question"

He doesn't allow her to ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never a lender nor borrower be.

Been there done that, didn’t get it back

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

No he got them both in debt now they can get a penny

Lost his house due to what ever he spent the money on

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"No he got them both in debt now they can get a penny

Lost his house due to what ever he spent the money on "

She might be embarrassed to say why she needs the money in that case. I wouldn't lend it but I'd be worried about my sister

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Loan companies ask, so why shouldn’t you. It’s reasonable to want to know the likelihood of getting the money back!

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By *rs mischiefWoman
over a year ago

Manchester


"I retired when I was 47 after working and saving like mad all my working life

Just get a family member ring up and ask if I can lend them 5 k

When I ask for what they go off on one

I think I have the right to know why they want the money

Or maybe I dont

"

I would ask what they wanted the money for too..

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