FabSwingers.com forum: Are swinging and fetish mutually exclusive?

By *acDreamy OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

Often it seems that kink/fetish and swinging are separate and you need to be one or the other.

Have you found this too? Does anyone manage to live a double life?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why? I mean why do you think that?

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By *acDreamy OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

I have attended a couple of fet events and found that most seemed tonenjoy the kink without play.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I have attended a couple of fet events and found that most seemed tonenjoy the kink without play. "

I do find the swinging community more accepting of the ctoss over between swinging and kink than some of the kink community.

I don't often like to say I'm a swinger when I go to munches for fear of the backlash lol although to be honest I don't go to many munches. Very clickey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think it depends where you come from

I come from kink and definitely found it easier to explore there than swing, though may not class myself as a swinger, just someone who wants to explore sex a bit more

I think some kinksters feel that their side has better understanding of rules on consent and interaction

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By *acDreamy OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

"I have attended a couple of fet events and found that most seemed tonenjoy the kink without play.

I do find the swinging community more accepting of the ctoss over between swinging and kink than some of the kink community.

I don't often like to say I'm a swinger when I go to munches for fear of the backlash lol although to be honest I don't go to many munches. Very clickey. "

I found the events friendly and welcoming but also felt that swinging was slightly frowned upon.

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By *acDreamy OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

"Think it depends where you come from

I come from kink and definitely found it easier to explore there than swing, though may not class myself as a swinger, just someone who wants to explore sex a bit more

I think some kinksters feel that their side has better understanding of rules on consent and interaction "

That's a really interesting take on it.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

Yes I have a double life on kink and sexual play

kinks are non sexual for me, but they are sexual for my sub

vanilla/tantric play is all about mutual sexual pleasure for me and my partners

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Often it seems that kink/fetish and swinging are separate and you need to be one or the other.

Have you found this too? Does anyone manage to live a double life?

I think this is purely misunderstanding and interpretation of what is a Kink and what is a Fetish.

While I might have a variety of totally unrelated Kinks - swinging is one of those - I have no Fetishes.

KINK: Man likes wearing lacy knickers to work but does so just for any particular reason at the time.

FETISH: Man "requires" to have lacy knickers to achieve any sexual arousal/enjoyment whatsoever.

In either situation there is no mention if said man's sexual involvement with anyone else. He might be totally asexual and celibate, he might be the local sauna slut, or he might be the happily married monogamous doting dad who captains the local footy team.

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By *ilent...BobMan
over a year ago

Shushhhhhhyourmouthville

Do we need definitions for swinging, isn't it more about being free and doing whatever you like but not having to justify or define it to anyone. Fun, right?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Do we need definitions for swinging, isn't it more about being free and doing whatever you like but not having to justify or define it to anyone. Fun, right?

I wish it was like that but it isn't.

There are a few people who just get on and do the things they enjoy without worrying about being in a certain group though

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

Depends on the individual obviously, but being a kinkster I find that match incredibly difficult to make and it involves getting to know someone pretty well. I can do vanilla but it’s not nearly as gratifying so I rarely do.. so yes for me there’s a huge difference and why I meet so few people.

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By *acDreamy OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

"Do we need definitions for swinging, isn't it more about being free and doing whatever you like but not having to justify or define it to anyone. Fun, right?

It has to be fun. Otherwise what is the point?

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By *acDreamy OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

"Depends on the individual obviously, but being a kinkster I find that match incredibly difficult to make and it involves getting to know someone pretty well. I can do vanilla but it’s not nearly as gratifying so I rarely do.. so yes for me there’s a huge difference and why I meet so few people. "

Not just me then!

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

For us we enjoy both but we’ve not shared any element of BDSM into our play sessions with others.

I guess it’s finding the right person(s) and needing to play with them on a number of occasions to build up the trust.

I think it’s harder with (some) swingers as they just want to keep things at a certain level but to delve into the world of kink you can’t just turn up and do certain things with people. Or I wouldn’t want to anyway!

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