FabSwingers.com forum: Unread or Ignored?

By *ittycen OP Man
over a year ago

south west

Which do you find the most frustrating? A message being read and ignored, or not read at all?

Now before anyone jumps down my throat, I KNOW that either response is perfectly fine and acceptable to do - god knows women get enough messages already and demanding an answer to each is petulant and needy. I was just wondering which people found the most frustrating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Neither, i just make a note on their profile. If the read and dont reply, I wouldn't contact them again.

Since I've been on here for a few years now, that number is starting to build up lol

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

Neither as I never look.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I rarely message to be honest

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By *reat me rightWoman
over a year ago

Rotherham

I didn't read and ignored a message yesterday. I got up to a tirade of abuse as to just how up myself I must be - for a fat ugly cunt!

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

Unread = they’ve maybe not seen it, too many messages in their inbox. Leave it a while and try again another time

Read it and no reply = instant block

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By *vriderMan
over a year ago

Chester

I read on an advice thread here to delete a message as soon as you send it. That way you'll never know.

It actually works too! Stops the whole stressing about why it has or hasn't been opened and if it has why haven't they replied

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think of sending a message to a woman on here as like letting go of a balloon, sometimes the balloon will disappear into the ether, sometimes the balloon will come back to you with a note on, other times you may get a different balloon come back to the one you sent, it’s weird when that happens, but if you send enough balloons you will not be invested in just the one balloon, so buy more balloons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think of sending a message to a woman on here as like letting go of a balloon, sometimes the balloon will disappear into the ether, sometimes the balloon will come back to you with a note on, other times you may get a different balloon come back to the one you sent, it’s weird when that happens, but if you send enough balloons you will not be invested in just the one balloon, so buy more balloons. "

Can you make a sausage dog out of a balloon ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unread/Read but not deleted - leave it a couple weeks and then delete it from sent, they might read it one day or message me (don't think thats ever happened).

Unread/Read and deleted - I block. They have decided they have no interest in me.

My block list is absolutely huge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We leave on unread lots, usually because I reply and Mr browses, so I'd wait for him before replying. I never ignore though, I'd always say if I wasn't interested.

Mrs

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

I delete the message after I've sent it so I never have a clue what the recipient has done with it... Send and forget; always great to get a reply though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i block those i have no interest in i cant answer all my messages as ill never have time for play but if someone takes it as im not interested thats their problem..

we all use fab differently some women want the long chat some dont some will answer all alot wont ...best not to think we are all the same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest op even though we reply to every message even the inane “Hi” ones we have probably only sent three or four first messages in over three years so we don’t really know that feeling but if we reply and it goes unread I just delete it from the Sent box as I’m a bit OCD like that and forget about it but if a reply comes back the great so be it.

I’m sure that there should of been a comma or two in all that guff!!!

Tony

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By *uddly GoblinMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Neither are frustrating, if a message goes unread or no reply so be it

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

If I'm sending a first message I send and delete, so neither!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most of my forum posts are unread and ignored just like my profile lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unread = they’ve maybe not seen it, too many messages in their inbox. Leave it a while and try again another time

Read it and no reply = instant block"

I agree with this approach. Most of the time, I just haven't seen the message, it's not that I'm not interested. If I open a message, I'll always reply in some way. But there's a load of unread messages right now in my inbox, probably from great guys, that I just haven't seen as they've fallen off the bottom!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unread = they’ve maybe not seen it, too many messages in their inbox. Leave it a while and try again another time

Read it and no reply = instant block

Girllll, totally. It gets to the point of way too many messages and it’s hard to see all x

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Never check my sent messages folder so neither bother me to be honest.

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Really don't check so no idea.

None of those options will give you a warm and fuzzy feeling so why be checking?

If they reply, fantastic, if they don't, move on.

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

"Most of my forum posts are unread and ignored just like my profile lol"

I see you.

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By *JB1954Man
over a year ago

Reading

If I get a message. Lol. Then I reply . Check sent box and if still there or unread after a few days. I delete.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I completely understand what some of the ladies are saying about so many messages and not bn able reply to them all or missing them. I understand that. But what gets me is when you send a polite message to someone and they just block you lol.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Ignore a message from Chunky - never.

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By *uddy laneMan
over a year ago

dudley

An unread message,, they have not got to you yet or your subject did not stand out.

A read message and not answered,,, you may be on there get too list wait a week or 2.

A deleted message move on and block.

At all times keep hold of yourself and be gracious.

That is my method of dealing with first response.

Party on dudes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pretty much given up sending messages. I only come on to make the odd contribution to the forums and perv, I mean browse interesting profiles.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Neither. I message in my own way, at my own speed m. I let others do the same and wished people relaxed about this.

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By *ittycen OP Man
over a year ago

south west

"Neither as I never look."

Do you find you get many unanswered messages though? Do you msg couples, men or women? This is purely curiosity

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By *ittycen OP Man
over a year ago

south west

I do confess to feeling a bit hurt when blocked. I appreciate that’s my problem, not anyone else’s, and I get why some block after having bad message experiences. But I know I’m not one of those arseholes but can’t prove it cos I’m blocked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get men blocking me for not having read a message I would have replied to had I seen it, so you can't do right from wrong on here.

A couple of for Unites have done it too ( or I think that's why as they winked me in the past.) They might just think I'm a massive c*** after seeing me on here!

Men really do need to take rejection better, and also not feel entitled to a reply.

One of the reasons I'm so poor at reading messages is I never know who will send abuse because I deleted their message.

I hear a lot about women being inundated but 95 percent* of the time I'm not. I just prefer to delete or leave unread if someone isn't for me, or doesn't seem like they're for me based on their profile.

Men May find that frustrating nut it's frustrating when your preferences are ignored so it's swings and roundabouts.

There are obviously polite and accepting men but I'm finding more and more won't accept a delete as a polite no thankyou.

* just a guesstimate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get men blocking me for not having read a message I would have replied to had I seen it, so you can't do right from wrong on here.

A couple of for Unites have done it too ( or I think that's why as they winked me in the past.) They might just think I'm a massive c*** after seeing me on here!

Men really do need to take rejection better, and also not feel entitled to a reply.

One of the reasons I'm so poor at reading messages is I never know who will send abuse because I deleted their message.

Men May find that frustrating nut it's frustrating when your preferences are ignored so it's swings and roundabouts.

There are obviously polite and accepting men but I'm finding more and more won't accept a delete as a polite no thankyou.

* just a guesstimate."

Forumites*

My sight is really poor, sorry!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't read and ignored a message yesterday. I got up to a tirade of abuse as to just how up myself I must be - for a fat ugly cunt!"

I'm sorry about that. It's sad some can't be an adult about it.

It shows their real colours and that they were being faux nice previously.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I wouldn't block you or give you any abuse. It's not in my nature. I'm just polite with everyone. Best way to be imo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I read & don't like I just block saves hassle

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

I very rarely send messages and in the whole 8 years I've been here whether someone replies or not has never frustrated me. Whatever someone does, whether they don't reply, whether they delete or dont, block or not seems to piss off or frustrate someone off, it just seems more hassle than its worth.

I just want to scream chill out ffs sometimes.

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

If it's read and deleted, that's a clear and understandable signal – they're not interested. That's fine. At least I know!

The message not even being read, though... ugh. Being left hanging is far, far worse than being rejected.

I put a lot of effort into the few messages I send. If they don't even get looked at, all that time and mental energy was just completely wasted.

I don't send many messages any more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just a not interested sorry would do me

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