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Stupid Questions ppl ask

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

After work I was buying a bag of Purina dog chow for my dog, while in the check-out line a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT ???So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again, and that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 3 stones before I awakened in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Better watch what you ask me and be prepared for my answer. I have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"After work I was buying a bag of Purina dog chow for my dog, while in the check-out line a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT ???So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again, and that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 3 stones before I awakened in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Better watch what you ask me and be prepared for my answer. I have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say"
thats brilliant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think they employ thick people on purpose

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

Loved this joke when I first heard it years ago.

Still makes me smile tho .. thanks x

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I bet all she wanted you to say was "yes" so she could be friendly and ask "What sort of dog is it?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I bet all she wanted you to say was "yes" so she could be friendly and ask "What sort of dog is it?""

yes you old misery guts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Iv bought dog food for my parents dog and I havnt got a dog. Still funny though!

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