FabSwingers.com forum: Body confidence

By *nourdreams OP Couple
over a year ago

Warwickshire

One for you ladies out there, I’m sick of being in a diet! And although I’ll still try to eat healthy I’m fed up of counting every calories & feeling guilty when I put something naughty in my mouth. I realise I could do with losing a stone but I’m going to rock my shape for what it currently is, wobbles and all!

Any tips for feeling super body confident?

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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago

Stirling

Embrace what you have, don’t work against it, fad diets don’t work so stop wasting time/energy/money on them…eat well but enjoy days of over indulgence, get out and exercise…walk/run/dance whatever the endorphins are amazing not to mention the health benefits…if your mind is happy you will be more content.

Just be you if we all looked like the airbrushed models that are rammed in our face daily it be pretty boring.

It’s taken me a long time but I love my body, the good and bad parts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give yourself a break from focusing on your body and just enjoy being

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By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford

Take the pressure off. Find a work out you enjoy or a range of workouts and keep things fresh.

Enjoy the food you eat and find foods that work for you.

You deserve better than to be a prisoner to your mind when it comes to food or appearance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Enjoy the food , I’d say don’t deprive yourself from what you like. Maybe just try to eat less of it if you are concerned about calories (I tend to do this, I eat everything I want but try to portion control rather than not eat what I like)

I used to be on super strict diets hit overall i found them to be unsustainable in the long run…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give yourself a break, diets don't work. Even the word alone makes you want to give up.

Slowly start to change your eating habits and lifestyle. Find an exercise you enjoy and go at your own pace. Eventually these little changes will become the normality and you will start to notice the difference.

For the time being.. perfect body? There's no such thing. We all have our hang ups but try and focus on the things you like about yourself for a little bit. Don't spend too long obsessing in the mirror and leave the scales alone for a while.

Good luck OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never listen to the no sayers or people who always have a problem for a solution.

We all have parts of us we wish were better, I know for women there is a pressure to look attractive all the time.

But most of the time we think the worst of us when it really isn't the case.

Hope you feel more comfortable and confident in yourself OP.

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

Tend to find the sexist people tend to be those who are completely comfortable in their own skin. Definitely better to concentrate fitting into your skin rather than a dress size IMO.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You look great! Just be happy being you, that's more important!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m sitting here eating rice crackers rather than what I actually want to be eating, so I’m no help!

What I will say is that you can be body confident at any size if you take time each day to think about the positive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t have any tips but you look amazing! Your figure looks perfect to me, one I can only dream of

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Embrace what you have, don’t work against it, fad diets don’t work so stop wasting time/energy/money on them…eat well but enjoy days of over indulgence, get out and exercise…walk/run/dance whatever the endorphins are amazing not to mention the health benefits…if your mind is happy you will be more content.

Just be you if we all looked like the airbrushed models that are rammed in our face daily it be pretty boring.

It’s taken me a long time but I love my body, the good and bad parts

^This

I can also recomend the fitness marshall on YouTube its dances, I go for the short ones first and then see if I'm oumper for another, I scream with laughter at myself, even done a few videos of me attempting them just because i think there funny and I cant dance like them...progress not perfection.

I don't weigh myself, you know in yourself by your clothes, just try to eat cleaner, alcohol crisps and chocolate are my main baddies, crisps and chocolate i tend to binge, thinking I'm treating myself, but it's not really a treat. I also recognise when I'm emotional eating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im physically the fittest iv been since i was 25 but its not enough

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So on my own advice I've just done 3 caleb fitness marshal dances, all short! Haven't done them in yonks! Got a bad knee and just lacked motivation...I'm sweating and blowing like a whale after maybe 9 mins total. But I moved! it's exercise and fun exercise. Just do what you can but I actually forgot how much I enjoyed it!

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By *acDreamyMan
over a year ago

Wirral

Not just women struggle with body confidence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your OP is full of negative feelings and descriptions - fed up, guilty, wobbles etc and that is where I believe you are stuck. You feel negative about your figure but you also feel negative about whatever diet it is you're following to change it which means you can't win.

Changing that isn't something that others can achieve by telling you one 'weird secret that doctors don't want you to know' or by complimenting your appearance. To change you need to learn to break the negative associations with both your figure and your food - learn how to find enjoyment in them both.

Keeping in shape in today's world is incredibly hard, we have machines to take the effort out of all our jobs and energy rich food types that were scarce like fat and sugar are deliberately mixed with everything as they are very addictive.

As I see it there are two ways around this, constantly be fighting a never ending battle with food, weight and exercise or learn to enjoy the stuff that works. Find an exercise you do because you enjoy it not because you feel you have to do it. Slowly change your diet until you are used to and prefer the blander taste of food that's not loaded with calories and a small portion leaves you feeling full. I used to be a fiend for sugar on my cereal - still can be but I'll happily eat a bowl of porridge made with skimmed milk, no sugar and just half a banana sliced up for sweetness. I will still enjoy a bowl made with full fat milk and two big spoons of brown sugar as a treat but I feel over full after. It has taken us a long time but I believe a big part of it is in feeling good about the gains rather than feeling bad about the slip ups. Even then, we still have to make an effort to be aware of how much we're eating and that's with running at least 20 miles a week, often double that. That level of effort has to be enjoyable else life becomes a misery.

Good luck - and for what it's worth, you look just fine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Buy bigger clothes/ clothes that fit and make you feel good. Forget labels exist. Sizes are bollocks and can be different even in the same shop.

Nothing worse than wearing something too tight and feeling shit.

Also do it for *you*. Confidence radiates and other people can sense it and they will reflect it back at you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I looked at your pictures I'm not sure why your calorie counting? Is there something deeper? Maybe other areas you dont feel you have control over?

I think moving out bodies is important, I've a badly busted knee, i dont like 'exercise ' unless its what i call secret exerciseing, dancing yoga and pilates fall into this category, something that doesnt feel like exercise. Anyway, i have gained weight, no I'm not saying this for anyone to say anything, the point is I've noticed it, bit then also know the knee is a major factor, I've lost muscle whatever its called due to this, not being able to use and rely on the leg and seeing the change has kind of out me into a little funk. But thanks to your post I took my own advice and danced. So I'd like to say thank you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buy bigger clothes/ clothes that fit and make you feel good. Forget labels exist. Sizes are bollocks and can be different even in the same shop.

Nothing worse than wearing something too tight and feeling shit.

Also do it for *you*. Confidence radiates and other people can sense it and they will reflect it back at you.

O god the labels are awful! I can be a size 12 in one shop and an 18 in another!

I hate the feeling of tags and cut them out anyway. I also dont have scales in the house

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just be you if we all looked like the airbrushed models that are rammed in our face daily it be pretty boring.

It’s taken me a long time but I love my body, the good and bad parts

This

Miss S x

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

For me it's about moving my body - then I feel good, I have more energy, I feel strong - so I focus less on how I look

Mrs TMN x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As the outside has improved the insides have rotted away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One for you ladies out there, I’m sick of being in a diet! And although I’ll still try to eat healthy I’m fed up of counting every calories & feeling guilty when I put something naughty in my mouth. I realise I could do with losing a stone but I’m going to rock my shape for what it currently is, wobbles and all!

Any tips for feeling super body confident?"

One of life’s struggles this, not just for you ladies I’m afraid. I suffer with stomach issues so I tend to feel a bit better when I stay clear of processed foods that make me feel uncomfortable. I also find eating foods I enjoy whilst also not junk help how I feel.. not necessarily calorie deficit but just choices full of better nutrition… I think body image and confidence is personal, I know people twice my size who are very happy.. so I guess it’s also about your identity and how you want to be seen? I don’t think anyone can truly tell someone how to be happy and confident in themselves, but taking control certainly helps, whilst being realistic with expectations and smart about goal setting. I tend to treat my nutrition and exercise like a credit system, exercise more when I have the time to pay for the days I can’t, and eat less on days I can to accommodate days where I know I have plans or just wanna be a pig haha.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Change your mindset. Enjoy what you have in life, the big things and the small. Learn to be happy

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I am small with wobbly bits, but I'm happy with who I am. I love and like being me even if no-one else does x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just be you if we all looked like the airbrushed models that are rammed in our face daily it be pretty boring.

It’s taken me a long time but I love my body, the good and bad parts

The good and great parts

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Warrior pose feel your power

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Learn to love the skin you’re in! 99% of the time you’re the only one who notices

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By *andyBlax_XLMan
over a year ago

Mansfield

Any tips for feeling super body confident?"

This really isn’t about me as I think you’re looking for some tips and guidance. I have the opposite problem I can’t keep any weight on and non of the females I have been active with have any kind words to say about it. So I’d say being comfortable in whom you are usually translate to positive things.

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By *nourdreams OP Couple
over a year ago

Warwickshire

Thanks for all the lovely comments, I do lack in a bit of confidence generally but trying to work on it x

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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham

If I'm not prepared to DO anything about weight issues, then I don't stress over them. I can help myself or I can accept myself. Beating myself up is absolutely pointless though.

Many men find all shapes and sizes attractive. As women, we are lucky in that respect.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I think my biggest tip even though I forget it myself. Is that I'm more than just my body. If we saw personal confidence as your aim in life than body, I think more of us would be happier. Our bodies are just one aspect of what makes us us.

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By *onb21Woman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Any tips for feeling super body confident?"

More fabbing.

Offline no one looks at me twice and here it's different. My confidence is much better now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's nothing more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself, happy and comfortable in her body shape and size. That, to me, is the true essence of beauty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any tips for feeling super body confident?

More fabbing.

Offline no one looks at me twice and here it's different. My confidence is much better now."

Love the username

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's nothing more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself, happy and comfortable in her body shape and size. That, to me, is the true essence of beauty. "

I wish I could find a way to reach that level of confidence but right now I’m bigger/heavier than I’ve ever been and dieting just isn’t haven’t any effect.

I’m at the point that it’s now becoming a blocker to going on meets or to clubs. It’s just becoming a viscous circle that I think no one could actually be attracted to me and not giving someone the chance to find out.

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