FabSwingers.com forum: Can sex be therapeutic?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Lazy Sunday question for overworking minds.. can sex help you heal some issues or old wounds?

Discuss, please.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

100% therapeutic ...sex is like breathing...makes me feel human and at one with nature

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not sure the physical act alone would do that long term

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No. Not in my opinion. The wounds and issues will still be there

Unless the issue was lack of sex

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By *B69Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

Not sure about healing or old wounds but it definitely clears your mind for a few hours

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No. Not in my opinion. The wounds and issues will still be there

Unless the issue was lack of sex

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Not sure about healing or old wounds but it definitely clears your mind for a few hours"

Temporary fix then.

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

It can't heal wounds, but it can help patch up some of then or make you forget the pain for a while

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

It's helped me greatly. But I had a lot of wounds surrounding it.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"It's helped me greatly. But I had a lot of wounds surrounding it."

Not physical ones mostly I should add

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

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By *ougie321Man
over a year ago

Milford Haven

No definitely won’t. Let them clear naturally then have sex. Let me know when they are gone

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

Certainly, definitely, 100% no doubt for me

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By *9alMan
over a year ago

Bridgend

it could make a good excuse," I am just nipping out to see my therapist"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn’t say heal old wounds

More like patch them up for a good day or two

Ie confidence or body image issues

Have sex and someone wanting you in that way can put you on a high for a little while

Till that self doubt creeps back in agein

Also helps for get about problems and such for a little while

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

Kinda, the first time I had sex after my split it was like woah, now I remember what it used to be like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont think its the sex is it. Its the person you have the sex with that helps you heal. The trust in them and the sharing of something with someone. The touch rather 'sex' as a thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends what the issues are. Definite stress reliever and ego boost for me at least. I guess everyone's relationship with sex is personal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Relaxation, endorphins, exercise and human contact.

I'd say it's a net positive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely, sex can be emotional or it can be a cathartic release for any number of issues past or present x

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

It only papers over cracks. But can make you feel good in the process temporarily.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

Yes I think it can, to me sex with your partner is about bringing mind and body together.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends the issues or wounds.

Sex can also be an addictive act and you will find yourself stuck into another issue.

Also sex could take you back to the good or bad memory you had with that partner that you try to forget.

Some women who suffer a -trigger drama- try to heal with risky sexual encounter to regain control.

Being an endorphin producer, sex can help at the time but then you will be back in the dark side again…

So, sex only is not a healer…

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By *tmosphericalMan
over a year ago

Gwent

"Kinda, the first time I had sex after my split it was like woah, now I remember what it used to be like

"
can relate, sex after my ex was like a chapter closing and all the frustrations kind of dwindled.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It only papers over cracks. But can make you feel good in the process temporarily. "

Like a decoupage

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Kinda, the first time I had sex after my split it was like woah, now I remember what it used to be like

Or what it should be like ?

I remember that too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm not sure the physical act alone would do that long term

No me neither. But it could be a good poke?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not sure the physical act alone would do that long term

No me neither. But it could be a good poke? "

A good poke doesn't sound very therapeutic to me

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

"Kinda, the first time I had sex after my split it was like woah, now I remember what it used to be like

Or what it should be like ?

I remember that too. "

Yeah that actually, years of selfish sex where I felt like a piece of meat for his enjoyment to actually being the one on the receiving end was refreshing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know... everyone feels different things

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm not sure the physical act alone would do that long term

No me neither. But it could be a good poke?

A good poke doesn't sound very therapeutic to me "

Metaphorical poke

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Depends the issues or wounds.

Sex can also be an addictive act and you will find yourself stuck into another issue.

Also sex could take you back to the good or bad memory you had with that partner that you try to forget.

Some women who suffer a -trigger drama- try to heal with risky sexual encounter to regain control.

Being an endorphin producer, sex can help at the time but then you will be back in the dark side again…

So, sex only is not a healer… "

Trigger drama ? Did you mean trauma?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I guess everyone's relationship with sex is personal."

Yes. I'm curious of differences.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Additional question: can it make things worse?

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By *ightmovesTV/TS
over a year ago

Ipswich

Flesh on flesh can be/should be a good state to be in. Lots of cuddles.

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

If it's someone that wants to be with you and cares about you, it might help build back faith in life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It used to make me fitter dunno about my nut tho

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely it is in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Depends the issues or wounds.

Sex can also be an addictive act and you will find yourself stuck into another issue.

Also sex could take you back to the good or bad memory you had with that partner that you try to forget.

Some women who suffer a -trigger drama- try to heal with risky sexual encounter to regain control.

Being an endorphin producer, sex can help at the time but then you will be back in the dark side again…

So, sex only is not a healer…

Trigger drama ? Did you mean trauma? "

Yes…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Relaxation, endorphins, exercise and human contact.

I'd say it's a net positive.

This!

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Depends on the circs.

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Additional question: can it make things worse? "

It all depends again.

You will search in sex what hurt you, that quest will turn into prob an unsatisfied hunt with multiple partners.. nymphomaniac maybe

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

"Lazy Sunday question for overworking minds.. can sex help you heal some issues or old wounds?

Discuss, please.

Some of what we get up to can help with understanding yourself which may help with healing, but thats because we work with mental as well as physical energy.

We have helped people dealing with abuse come to terms with their sexuality. People who have issues with vulnerability and control. Others who have phobias about certain things.

Before anyone gets antsy, we aren’t professionals nor do we make out to be, so we don’t try and be arm chair psychiatrists, its more about helping people accept who they are.

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By *opilotMan
over a year ago

Heathrow

It certainly makes me feel great and leaves me buzzing for a few days

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

It can take your mind off things for sure. For a while

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

"Lazy Sunday question for overworking minds.. can sex help you heal some issues or old wounds?

Discuss, please.

Depends on what the individual's perception of therapeutic means. For me cooking is therapeutic, painting is therapeutic, walking in the woods is therapeutic...do those actions alone heel any trauma? No, but my mind and "soul" is calm afterwards and a calm mind heals more easily. So, yes your body releases endorphins during sex and enters a state of calmness and relaxation afterwards, so for me it can be therapeutic (but depends who you share that moment with)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best reply so far!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In bdsm, the sub space, the space created can be a healing place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lazy Sunday question for overworking minds.. can sex help you heal some issues or old wounds?

Discuss, please.

Some of what we get up to can help with understanding yourself which may help with healing, but thats because we work with mental as well as physical energy.

We have helped people dealing with abuse come to terms with their sexuality. People who have issues with vulnerability and control. Others who have phobias about certain things.

Before anyone gets antsy, we aren’t professionals nor do we make out to be, so we don’t try and be arm chair psychiatrists, its more about helping people accept who they are."

I agree with this too. I have such a huge amount of trust in him,I feel completely safe with him, which I’ve never had before, so our relationship has changed me for the better.

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

"Lazy Sunday question for overworking minds.. can sex help you heal some issues or old wounds?

Discuss, please.

This!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to use wanking as a 'pick-me-up' and stress reliever. But it is only temporary. In that moment yes but not as a permanent fix.

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

Absolutely 100% Yes. For me anyway!

All the natural goodness you get from a sweat inducing, energy releasing, passionate session. It's s the best medicine!

Jo.Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That said, the whole in out of cock in cunt is pretty lovely.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Absolutely 100% Yes. For me anyway!

All the natural goodness you get from a sweat inducing, energy releasing, passionate session. It's s the best medicine!

Jo.Xx "

Better than a chicken soup?

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I find the physicality of sex relaxes me, it lifts my mood and distresses me, especially if the sex is good.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Lazy Sunday question for overworking minds.. can sex help you heal some issues or old wounds?

Discuss, please.

Some of what we get up to can help with understanding yourself which may help with healing, but thats because we work with mental as well as physical energy.

We have helped people dealing with abuse come to terms with their sexuality. People who have issues with vulnerability and control. Others who have phobias about certain things.

Before anyone gets antsy, we aren’t professionals nor do we make out to be, so we don’t try and be arm chair psychiatrists, its more about helping people accept who they are."

In BDSM scenarios?

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Absolutely 100% Yes. For me anyway!

All the natural goodness you get from a sweat inducing, energy releasing, passionate session. It's s the best medicine!

Jo.Xx

Better than a chicken soup?

100,00000% Better than that!

Jo.Xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Depends on the circs.

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

Examples?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it's someone that wants to be with you and cares about you, it might help build back faith in life."

But if the faith is buikd around someone else will it go when they leave?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Kinda, the first time I had sex after my split it was like woah, now I remember what it used to be like

Or what it should be like ?

I remember that too.

Yeah that actually, years of selfish sex where I felt like a piece of meat for his enjoyment to actually being the one on the receiving end was refreshing"

And may it long continues. We aren't meat.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"it could make a good excuse," I am just nipping out to see my therapist" "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

I think any life enhancing pleasure must have a very positive effect on body and soul. But sex maybe more complicated than say, walking or listening to great music because of the personal relations which it takes place in. I'd say these need to be life enhancing and encouraging too for a really healing experience. My experience anyway.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

"I dont think its the sex is it. Its the person you have the sex with that helps you heal. The trust in them and the sharing of something with someone. The touch rather 'sex' as a thing. "

I'm going with this as my answer as it about sums it up perfectly.

Sex on it's own can be a short term pleasurable fix - an escape even, but it on its own can't provide it longer term.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

Sex can be a good distraction from life. So it can be used to soothe or paper over the cracks for a short while but ultimately it won’t solve other issues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't know ?

Never get any

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dependant on your emotional well-being. Yes it could be.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get. "

Rough sex

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get.

Rough sex

Not exactly what I had in mind. But i guess that too could trigger some people.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Relaxation, endorphins, exercise and human contact.

I'd say it's a net positive.

Sounds like a prescription.

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By *lasphemousGirlWoman
over a year ago

Cambs

100% it helps me, the yummy mix of happy hormones from an orgasm genuinely helps with my pain level, I have fibromyalgia, it energizes me mentally too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get. "

I don't follow...if the sex is good and it's within a relationship that's enhancing and encouraging, where does the damage come in?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get. "

You mean the wider relationship or connection can break bad as well as good, and undermine the positive effects of the sex as well as enhance them? That's true, but if we want a regular sex partner in any form I'm not sure how we avoid those attachments and the risks that accompany them.

Very interesting thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And to go back to the original OP question, I don't think good sex can be properly healing in a lasting way without a wider personal connection of some kind.

(I'm not really writing to calm by football nerves, honest

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Uhm, depends where you are with your mind. If you are in a good place it can be very therapeutic, but if you use sex to heal from hurt… I don’t think it is good. It probably is counter productive. It’s much better to try focus on other things that make you feel good. Maybe travel instead to refresh.

But just having random sex with random people when you are in a bad place mentally… it’s not good.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 12/07/21 06:32:56]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get.

I don't follow...if the sex is good and it's within a relationship that's enhancing and encouraging, where does the damage come in?"

Because your mind perhaps wasn't that ready for healing as your body told you. Or what sexycatkylie said.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get.

Very interesting thread."

I don't think I had that in mind when I typed up but also interesting food for thought. Might chew over it.

Thank you!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dependant on your emotional well-being. Yes it could be."

That's what I wondered too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get.

I don't follow...if the sex is good and it's within a relationship that's enhancing and encouraging, where does the damage come in?

Because your mind perhaps wasn't that ready for healing as your body told you. Or what sexycatkylie said. "

Exactly, I’ve been there and even if it was exciting at

first, it always left me with a worse feeling afterwards, and I’d go back thinking “I wish it was another person” or whatever.

So no, I’d say take up a new hobby, or travel! When I was badly hurt by a dickhead ex bf… I travelled and went to a surf/yoga retreat abroad and best decision I

Made. Like It rebalanced me even if I still had to deal with loads and it was nice to focus on different new things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't follow...if the sex is good and it's within a relationship that's enhancing and encouraging, where does the damage come in?

Because your mind perhaps wasn't that ready for healing as your body told you. Or what sexycatkylie said. "

Thanks, that makes sense. Those tricks our minds and bodies play on each other.

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By *angerous123Man
over a year ago

Leeds

It takes the edge off

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By *urulovesnylonMan
over a year ago

Harrow

The whole “process” from light flirting to foreplay to sex and finally to the climax is very therapeutic for me. I suppose I’m not a wham bam type of guy and need all the aspects. The heartbeats the breathing all of it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get.

I don't follow...if the sex is good and it's within a relationship that's enhancing and encouraging, where does the damage come in?

Because your mind perhaps wasn't that ready for healing as your body told you. Or what sexycatkylie said.

Exactly, I’ve been there and even if it was exciting at

first, it always left me with a worse feeling afterwards, and I’d go back thinking “I wish it was another person” or whatever.

So no, I’d say take up a new hobby, or travel! When I was badly hurt by a dickhead ex bf… I travelled and went to a surf/yoga retreat abroad and best decision I

Made. Like It rebalanced me even if I still had to deal with loads and it was nice to focus on different new things

What a brilliant advice. Make yourself a priority.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe I should have written- can GOOD SEX be therapeutic

The problem is it can be damaging further too. You never know what you are going to get.

I don't follow...if the sex is good and it's within a relationship that's enhancing and encouraging, where does the damage come in?

Because your mind perhaps wasn't that ready for healing as your body told you. Or what sexycatkylie said.

Exactly, I’ve been there and even if it was exciting at

first, it always left me with a worse feeling afterwards, and I’d go back thinking “I wish it was another person” or whatever.

So no, I’d say take up a new hobby, or travel! When I was badly hurt by a dickhead ex bf… I travelled and went to a surf/yoga retreat abroad and best decision I

Made. Like It rebalanced me even if I still had to deal with loads and it was nice to focus on different new things

What a brilliant advice. Make yourself a priority. "

Exactly! Do something you always wanted to try that is constructive and push yourself. It’s kinda like pressing a reset button

I’ve always found that heartbreak makes me progress forward because being so low It gave me strength to do something new and think about me.

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By *egasus NobMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth

Tremendously, sex can be therapeutic or I would say sex is therapeutic, but at the same time can be harmful and use as a weapon, guilt, and other complex penalties like jealousy, humiliation.

A lot of pleasure, happiness and relief can come from sex, the release of dopamine and serotonin the pleasure and reward neurotransmitter. Sex is the most important part of adult play, especially feeling and touching.

However, can get accustomed to someone you don't notice anything anymore, or the opposite you become more aware and conscious.

Human contact can provide quick aware and conscious feedback and proof that your state of mind and degree of feeling can have a direct effect on another person, as well as on yourself.

So, I would say sex can heal physical and mental wounds, physical, for example, unused muscles group can be an exercise at times working up sweat, mental feeling wanted, sharing, caring, mood etc. but of course, like any healing method this is just one part of a complex chain of event.

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By *luvpussy40Man
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

Yes it can, takes all the stress away of daily life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Lazy Sunday question for overworking minds.. can sex help you heal some issues or old wounds?

Discuss, please.

Definitely, sex and in certain aspects Fab has been incredibly therapeutic allowing for healing and growth for both of us

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