FabSwingers.com forum: Bdsm test

By *he James gang OP Couple
over a year ago

NEWTOWNABBEY

Does anyone actually read or give a fxxk about these. Total crapola in my opinion. Mr

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Does anyone actually read or give a fxxk about these. Total crapola in my opinion. Mr"

Total Crapolla is right

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never bothered to read it when I’ve seen the results on profiles

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

It puts me off profiles if I see it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does anyone actually read or give a fxxk about these. Total crapola in my opinion. Mr"

I dont...

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

nope … might be helpful for a beginner to see where they are slightly leaning towards to but it’s not giving the full correct results in my opinion so I don’t bother checking them on others

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

"Does anyone actually read or give a fxxk about these. Total crapola in my opinion. Mr"

Some do which is why they include them.

You could say the same about anyones profile content that covers their likes, you either engage with it or it turns you away.

If its things that interest you though, then it can be a conversation starter.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

No, my personal preference would be if they took those results and wrote something personal to them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I found them enlightening when I did my first one.. Helped with conversations and exploration

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A bit like the Sydney University disclaimer, I suspect the site owners would prefer people didn't clog up valuable server space

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Na im good at sex dont need a test to tell me that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it can be helpful as there is a lot of granular detail in what someone enjoys within the BDSM spectrum. "I am Dom" or "I am sub" doesn't really cut it a lot of the time.

Equally agree with the person above who said it's better to write something personal to you based on the results "I am very into x, y or z when it comes to bdsm".

I suppose as a conversation starter it could have it's benefits.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tl;dr I like them and appreciate them being posted.

Longer version;

Personally I appreciate someone taking the time to do the test and post the results.

The option to tick "SM" on here is a very broad brush and at least with the test it gives me a chance to see if we are likely to be interested in the same things.

It all comes down to preference I guess, I read people's profiles but often times they skip over or don't event mention their interest in SM so I just move on, don't want to clogg someone's inbox if they aren't going to be interested.

It all comes down to what you're after, as I'm looking to meet kinky people, the test is a good useful resource.

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up

"I found them enlightening when I did my first one.. Helped with conversations and exploration "
this, it can also be funny to see how much the answers change as you evolve.

However I think everyone knows its quite light hearted and fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does anyone actually read or give a fxxk about these. Total crapola in my opinion. Mr"

I've took the test three times at different intervals - none match!

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

They mean nothing to us and we scroll straight past it. But equally that is because we have little or no interest in bdsm so have little understanding of what that all means.

Assume it helps others and it is their profile to do with as they see fit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find it an interesting excercise in discussion when talking kink/BDSM with a.n.other. Doesn't give an 'absolute' appraisal as we all have minute differences in our preferences, but it's a great indicator to help drive conversation. I've also found many times people say "that's a surprise" when they get their own results, so it's either a relatively inacurate analysis, or we don't know ourselves as well as we think we do! Either way, like I say, it drives conversation.

As for posting results to your profile. Your profile is your profile, do what the fuck you want.

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By *ersey GirlCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

load of nonesense

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I find it an interesting excercise in discussion when talking kink/BDSM with a.n.other. Doesn't give an 'absolute' appraisal as we all have minute differences in our preferences, but it's a great indicator to help drive conversation. I've also found many times people say "that's a surprise" when they get their own results, so it's either a relatively inacurate analysis, or we don't know ourselves as well as we think we do! Either way, like I say, it drives conversation.

As for posting results to your profile. Your profile is your profile, do what the fuck you want."

I think once you are on your journey there would rarely be surprises, but in the early days it can be enlightening... It helped me to realise i was sub with no Domme interest... Which is the opposite from my non-sexual self!

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

When starting a D/S or Top/bottoming relationship it is one of the tools I use for compatibility. If it reveals that she is high on the dominant and rigger percentages then it raises early whether it is worth going forward because we would not be compatible. It is not definitive as someone may want to try something different. If it shows compatibility then it is worth going to the next step of the process. I use a series of forms, such as "wants and needs" form and a "what I am looking for" form. I also one of the many checklist of activities.

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

When I first dipped my toe into kink, it was interesting to see where I sat in the scheme of things, but it depends if you answered the questions honestly

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Personally I know my own mind and sexuality sufficiently to be able to articulate my submissive side and desires to a potential partner without the need for one - but can understand someone just starting to explore the lifestyle using one.

I think they also have a use between two people as a means of comparison and assessing likely compatibility - as others have said D/s is such a broad umbrella spectrum that covers so many different styles and dynamics to simply say "I'm Dom or sub" doesn't begin to cover it - it's also useful when used in conjunction with some of the other questionnaires out there that go into more details about specific elements and activities.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've done the test, it's just a bit of fun. Not something I'd post on my profile though. It's not a bad thing to get you thinking about what you may or may not be into.

However I don't think it's accurate at all and as people experience different things the results would change as they evolve.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do believe in them because my results said I'm 100% awesome

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"I do believe in them because my results said I'm 100% awesome

Only 100% ?

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

They're a useful tool for getting a snapshot of someone's desires at the time they took the test.

They're not perfect, of course, due to the way some of the questions are phrased – the results typically skew my interest in rope upwards, for some reason – but they are helpful in gaining a sense of someone's potential compatibility.

It's rather interesting to see people on here either a) loudly decrying them, or b) completely missing the point of what they're for.

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS
over a year ago

doncaster

I quite like reading them and gives an insight into the person's expections

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if you were unsure it opens your thoughts up, although I haven’t seen them used on profiles as much here S other sites xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They're a useful tool for getting a snapshot of someone's desires at the time they took the test.

It's rather interesting to see people on here either a) loudly decrying them, or b) completely missing the point of what they're for. "

On honesty I am assuming those peeps are not fully into BDSM.. Or perhaps just dip into parts of it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's rather interesting to see people on here either a) loudly decrying them, or b) completely missing the point of what they're for. "

Either? aren't the two connected? I'm not sure I get what you mean

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"They're a useful tool for getting a snapshot of someone's desires at the time they took the test.

It's rather interesting to see people on here either a) loudly decrying them, or b) completely missing the point of what they're for.

On honesty I am assuming those peeps are not fully into BDSM.. Or perhaps just dip into parts of it"

You're probably right. I was just a little surprised by the strength of some of the reactions. I often forget there seems to be such a pronounced anti-kink streak in the swinging community.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

" I often forget there seems to be such a pronounced anti-kink streak in the swinging community. "

Patience, explanation and education. Accepting you can only influence people’s opinions and never change them is a good start to avoid getting frustrated.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

"They're a useful tool for getting a snapshot of someone's desires at the time they took the test.

It's rather interesting to see people on here either a) loudly decrying them, or b) completely missing the point of what they're for.

On honesty I am assuming those peeps are not fully into BDSM.. Or perhaps just dip into parts of it

You're probably right. I was just a little surprised by the strength of some of the reactions. I often forget there seems to be such a pronounced anti-kink streak in the swinging community. "

I can't see any anti-kink on this thread personally. As with much in life, some like it some don't like the test.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I found it rather interesting. I've taken it for the past two days and both times my results have differed slightly which I'm putting down to a change in mood. It's a stepping stone for some, a chance to consider things they might not have or a way to engage in dialogue about certain things with others. That's not to say it's not without its problems and of course, you can rig it to give you particular results if you put your mind to it.

As far as having it on a profile goes, I wouldn't particularly pay much attention to it. I can understand why some do though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think its quite useful to those into bdsm or kink related things. I've taken it as I have a strong sub side to me but I also like it due to all the other fractions it shows you.

It does change, of course it will. But you tend to see a pattern or trend with your results, some percentages may change but the types can still be usually bunched together.

It's not something I put on our profile as husband isn't into it but I'm more than happy to chat and swap likes etc with people.

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By *issAphroditeWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

I guess it's more useful to those firmly in the kink community who perhaps have a more niche way of playing. For me, though, it's a turn off, although usefulness sadist and degrader are high on their charts, as I wouldn't want to meet people like that

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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago

Burnleyish (She/They)

"I guess it's more useful to those firmly in the kink community who perhaps have a more niche way of playing. For me, though, it's a turn off, although usefulness sadist and degrader are high on their charts, as I wouldn't want to meet people like that "

This is where it can become an issue.

Sadist and degrader can appear high on my chart. But that (or people) take that mean I'm always sadistic or only looking to degrade people.

Not only is that not the case, you have the added area in there of consent. I am only sadistic or degrading to those who:

A) I have an appropriate dynamic with.

And

B) They have consented to such play through negotiation.

There are plenty of people in my life that I play with or fuck who never see those sides of me.

People are multidimensional, it's just one facet of who someone is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sadist and degrader can appear high on my chart. But that (or people) take that mean I'm always sadistic or only looking to degrade people.

Not only is that not the case, you have the added area in there of consent. I am only sadistic or degrading to those who:

A) I have an appropriate dynamic with.

And

B) They have consented to such play through negotiation.

There are plenty of people in my life that I play with or fuck who never see those sides of me.

People are multidimensional, it's just one facet of who someone is. "

This is bang on. I am exactly the same. Couldn't have put it better myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is where it can become an issue.

Sadist and degrader can appear high on my chart. But that (or people) take that mean I'm always sadistic or only looking to degrade people.

Not only is that not the case, you have the added area in there of consent. I am only sadistic or degrading to those who:

A) I have an appropriate dynamic with.

And

B) They have consented to such play through negotiation.

There are plenty of people in my life that I play with or fuck who never see those sides of me.

People are multidimensional, it's just one facet of who someone is. "

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By *issAphroditeWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

This is where it can become an issue.

Sadist and degrader can appear high on my chart. But that (or people) take that mean I'm always sadistic or only looking to degrade people.

Not only is that not the case, you have the added area in there of consent. I am only sadistic or degrading to those who:

A) I have an appropriate dynamic with.

And

B) They have consented to such play through negotiation.

There are plenty of people in my life that I play with or fuck who never see those sides of me.

People are multidimensional, it's just one facet of who someone is. "

I'm aware of that. I've played with a Dom before, notnsure where he'd be on that chart but he certainly favoured masochistic women. The sex was great and we got on outside of the bedroom really well. However, psychologically, I sometimes thought I wasn't enough or that sex with me was dull in comparison to with rhe submissive women. Maybe it's an ego thing or something but I like to rock someone's world and get off on "doing it" for someone, not feeling a little bland .

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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago

Burnleyish (She/They)

"I'm aware of that. I've played with a Dom before, notnsure where he'd be on that chart but he certainly favoured masochistic women. The sex was great and we got on outside of the bedroom really well. However, psychologically, I sometimes thought I wasn't enough or that sex with me was dull in comparison to with rhe submissive women. Maybe it's an ego thing or something but I like to rock someone's world and get off on "doing it" for someone, not feeling a little bland ."

I bet he would feel pretty disappointed you felt that way. But it's still a you thing...

His play with submissive women will have been different but doesn't mean it's better (hell could even have been worse).

You're seeing that facet of him and assuming the other facets don't rock his world too.

Hell, I'm married to a vanilla asexual man. He rocks my world in many ways, I adore him, on the odd occasion we do have any sexual contact it rocks my world, even though he's the most vanilla anyone can be.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did a bdsm test a while ago. Completely useless. About as accurate as a sexuality quiz.

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