FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Living with risk....

Jump to newest
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

We all do - live with risk. How we live with it is different though.

Whether we invest in a high return portfolio or save money in bonds, whether we have the vaccine or not, whether we have bareback sex or not... we all decide almost daily on whether or not something is too risky for comfort.

I don't think there is a right or wrong on this one - merely an individual risk appetite which goes one way or another.

What risks are you considering to be too risky versus those that you are happy to take?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Marriage

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best things in my life have all come from taking risks so I’m definitely drawn that way, although there a big difference between risks where you have a lot of control on how things work out and blind chance. Risk taking and gambling are certainly not the same.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slightly off topic OP but it does seem men are more drawn to risk taking, I guess for hard wired evolutionary reasons.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all deal with risk every day of our lives, especially in the past year or so!

The risk we will never take is bareback sex. It will always be safe.

However, we all take risks meeting people from FAB we don’t truly know, but hopefully trust.

We all decide if the risk is worth it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I think people are more likely to fear new or occasional risk, even when the actual risk is lower than risks that they take frequently. It's the novelty that gets our attention. And inaction is seen as safer than being proactive.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Slightly off topic OP but it does seem men are more drawn to risk taking, I guess for hard wired evolutionary reasons. "

I wonder about that = perhaps something to do with the traditional hard-wired "hunter" role?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"We all deal with risk every day of our lives, especially in the past year or so!

The risk we will never take is bareback sex. It will always be safe.

However, we all take risks meeting people from FAB we don’t truly know, but hopefully trust.

We all decide if the risk is worth it? "

It is a really good example where opinions are polar opposite re the risk involved with bareback.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I think people are more likely to fear new or occasional risk, even when the actual risk is lower than risks that they take frequently. It's the novelty that gets our attention. And inaction is seen as safer than being proactive."

You know I am thinking that when we live in relative peace and quiet (not during pandemic, for example) we get a little bored with the humdrum so we seek more risk, perhaps gambling or whatever.

At times when we are existential threat from something outside our control we kind of withdraw and sit out the storm?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *batMan
over a year ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)


"I don't think there is a right or wrong on this one - merely an individual risk appetite which goes one way or another. "

The only problem here is when someone else's risk taking affects you or your loved ones adversely.

People still "risk"a few pints and speed home in the car. People don't want to "risk" the vaccine, regardless of the end result for others.

So I think there is a right and wrong answer, unless the risk only applies to you and you're willing to live with the consequences thereof.

Gbat

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Slightly off topic OP but it does seem men are more drawn to risk taking, I guess for hard wired evolutionary reasons.

I wonder about that = perhaps something to do with the traditional hard-wired "hunter" role?"

I think so, also men have always been more disposable than women, to put it in brutal evolutionary terms.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

I’m probably boring in that I’ve never been much of a risk taker. I like everything all organised and just so

I did go on a rollercoaster once. Never again!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I don't think there is a right or wrong on this one - merely an individual risk appetite which goes one way or another.

The only problem here is when someone else's risk taking affects you or your loved ones adversely.

People still "risk"a few pints and speed home in the car. People don't want to "risk" the vaccine, regardless of the end result for others.

So I think there is a right and wrong answer, unless the risk only applies to you and you're willing to live with the consequences thereof.

Gbat"

Ah maybe I should have added this is about risks within the law - speeding excessively, drink driving clearly are not and I really was not thinking of that when I was thinking about taking chances because we can. Thanks for pointing that out.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Slightly off topic OP but it does seem men are more drawn to risk taking, I guess for hard wired evolutionary reasons.

I wonder about that = perhaps something to do with the traditional hard-wired "hunter" role?

I think so, also men have always been more disposable than women, to put it in brutal evolutionary terms."

Sounds really brutal, doesn't it? I agree

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To me, risk is worth it if I believe it to be sensible (to my own sense of sensibility) to a degree and if I'm ok to deal with the consequences of that risk if things go astray.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I’m probably boring in that I’ve never been much of a risk taker. I like everything all organised and just so

I did go on a rollercoaster once. Never again! "

And if that is your happy place, that is totally ok!

The rollercoaster is a good example - I love them but did not when I had very young children - subconsciously probably being protective of them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"To me, risk is worth it if I believe it to be sensible (to my own sense of sensibility) to a degree and if I'm ok to deal with the consequences of that risk if things go astray. "

SO you are weighing up the impact of when things go wrong and if they are acceptable?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I can be totally paranoid about some diseases and get panicky too. So I tend to take more medicines or vaccines if possible… not sure if wise lol

On other hand, I’m pretty much risking my life by undergoing certain surgeries to be my true me. Im not thinking twice about it really…

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I think people are more likely to fear new or occasional risk, even when the actual risk is lower than risks that they take frequently. It's the novelty that gets our attention. And inaction is seen as safer than being proactive.

You know I am thinking that when we live in relative peace and quiet (not during pandemic, for example) we get a little bored with the humdrum so we seek more risk, perhaps gambling or whatever.

At times when we are existential threat from something outside our control we kind of withdraw and sit out the storm?"

Yes, I do think it differs depending on our background state and our surroundings

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love this topic!

Without risk, there is no return- the higher the risk, the higher the return!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"I’m probably boring in that I’ve never been much of a risk taker. I like everything all organised and just so

I did go on a rollercoaster once. Never again! "

I don't like them either , I don't have phobias as such but I'd rather not go on one if I can help it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Well I can be totally paranoid about some diseases and get panicky too. So I tend to take more medicines or vaccines if possible… not sure if wise lol

On other hand, I’m pretty much risking my life by undergoing certain surgeries to be my true me. Im not thinking twice about it really… "

I can relate to this - but it is about what is important at that moment in time, isn't it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Love this topic!

Without risk, there is no return- the higher the risk, the higher the return! "

I am kind of thinking if there is no potential return then taking a risk is maybe a bit just nutty - why would you do it kind of thing? If there is something to be gained from it = ROI then it is more calculated?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Love this topic!

Without risk, there is no return- the higher the risk, the higher the return!

I am kind of thinking if there is no potential return then taking a risk is maybe a bit just nutty - why would you do it kind of thing? If there is something to be gained from it = ROI then it is more calculated?"

Agreed xxx love your intelligence!! There are different ways to calculate the ROI , not always numerical xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iscretefuncoupleCouple
over a year ago

Blackheath

Do we take risk or accept risk ? As a swinger, you probably take greater risks than joe public ! Meeting complete strangers in pubs and clubs, trusting them to be discreet. Trusting them to be regularly Heath checked, trusting them to keep a condom on, and that’s just for starters ! I have had regular STD tests all my life. I’ve met many who’ve never had one ! As a couple we usually are attracted to couples of a similar age and circumstances !

Some people are fortunate to form a small bubble of like minded people, who only play with in the bubble, and everyone is regularly tested.

Would we risk playing with a single male ? Possibly, but everything would have to triple check out ! And as we’re not looking atm it would be unlikely !

Is bareback a risk ? Always, but with common sense it can be a small risk !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m probably boring in that I’ve never been much of a risk taker. I like everything all organised and just so

I did go on a rollercoaster once. Never again! "

Are you a Virgo, or anthor earth sign?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well I can be totally paranoid about some diseases and get panicky too. So I tend to take more medicines or vaccines if possible… not sure if wise lol

On other hand, I’m pretty much risking my life by undergoing certain surgeries to be my true me. Im not thinking twice about it really…

I can relate to this - but it is about what is important at that moment in time, isn't it?"

Yes exactly, I think if you find something to be very important then you kinda override the potential risks involved.

Also sometimes it’s in our heads more than anything, the fear of being hurt/dying/feeling pain etc I mean it can happen but what are the chances?

I used to be anxious about long haul flights because I’d always think.. “this is the day where it falls from the sky and it crashes”

It never stopped me from flying long haul but I’d wish I wouldn’t think like that lolol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts


"I’m probably boring in that I’ve never been much of a risk taker. I like everything all organised and just so

I did go on a rollercoaster once. Never again!

Are you a Virgo, or anthor earth sign?"

I don’t really do star signs but I’m a Scorpio

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m probably boring in that I’ve never been much of a risk taker. I like everything all organised and just so

I did go on a rollercoaster once. Never again!

Are you a Virgo, or anthor earth sign?

I don’t really do star signs but I’m a Scorpio "

Ah ha, I like to throw random star sign possibilitys out evey now and again when someone mentions specific personal traits, so far I'm 3/0 in getting them wrong haha. And no it's not even a earth sign, you are a water sign

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts


"I’m probably boring in that I’ve never been much of a risk taker. I like everything all organised and just so

I did go on a rollercoaster once. Never again!

Are you a Virgo, or anthor earth sign?

I don’t really do star signs but I’m a Scorpio

Ah ha, I like to throw random star sign possibilitys out evey now and again when someone mentions specific personal traits, so far I'm 3/0 in getting them wrong haha. And no it's not even a earth sign, you are a water sign"

Am I! I didn’t even know that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford


"I think people are more likely to fear new or occasional risk, even when the actual risk is lower than risks that they take frequently. It's the novelty that gets our attention. And inaction is seen as safer than being proactive."

I agree because it’s our perception of the risk, or our inability to draw on past personal experiences, that makes it appear more ‘dangerous’ than the reality

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts


"I think people are more likely to fear new or occasional risk, even when the actual risk is lower than risks that they take frequently. It's the novelty that gets our attention. And inaction is seen as safer than being proactive.

I agree because it’s our perception of the risk, or our inability to draw on past personal experiences, that makes it appear more ‘dangerous’ than the reality "

True. Depends what risks. I’ll put £20 on a horse. That’s a risk. I wouldn’t jump out of a plane for a million pounds!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To me, risk is worth it if I believe it to be sensible (to my own sense of sensibility) to a degree and if I'm ok to deal with the consequences of that risk if things go astray.

SO you are weighing up the impact of when things go wrong and if they are acceptable? "

In a way. The way I see risks is as calculated. It's about if the outcome is acceptable even if things go wrong sure but more importantly, if what I'm doing still remains up to my morals and beliefs as an individual. If I decide to do something, my conscience needs to be ok with it even if the "ROI" of the risk is negative if that makes sense

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"

Love this topic!

Without risk, there is no return- the higher the risk, the higher the return!

I am kind of thinking if there is no potential return then taking a risk is maybe a bit just nutty - why would you do it kind of thing? If there is something to be gained from it = ROI then it is more calculated?

Agreed xxx love your intelligence!! There are different ways to calculate the ROI , not always numerical xx "

You mean the likelihood over a period of time?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I’m probably boring in that I’ve never been much of a risk taker. I like everything all organised and just so

I did go on a rollercoaster once. Never again!

Are you a Virgo, or anthor earth sign?

I don’t really do star signs but I’m a Scorpio

Ah ha, I like to throw random star sign possibilitys out evey now and again when someone mentions specific personal traits, so far I'm 3/0 in getting them wrong haha. And no it's not even a earth sign, you are a water sign

Am I! I didn’t even know that "

I love how scorpios came into the equation - never thought of bringing those into risk management but it is an entertaining thought for a new thread

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the greatest risks I take are when doing nothing is preferable to doing something, even though doing something would potentially yield better results.

Oh, and my life on here!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Love this topic!

Without risk, there is no return- the higher the risk, the higher the return!

I am kind of thinking if there is no potential return then taking a risk is maybe a bit just nutty - why would you do it kind of thing? If there is something to be gained from it = ROI then it is more calculated?

Agreed xxx love your intelligence!! There are different ways to calculate the ROI , not always numerical xx

You mean the likelihood over a period of time? "

Yes, the effect it will do over a period of time- short & long term! X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"

Love this topic!

Without risk, there is no return- the higher the risk, the higher the return!

I am kind of thinking if there is no potential return then taking a risk is maybe a bit just nutty - why would you do it kind of thing? If there is something to be gained from it = ROI then it is more calculated?

Agreed xxx love your intelligence!! There are different ways to calculate the ROI , not always numerical xx

You mean the likelihood over a period of time?

Yes, the effect it will do over a period of time- short & long term! X"

So ... this could help out with establishing the likelihood of a successful fabs meet over time alongside the associated risks and the bottom line will be something alphanumerical as in "Don't do it more than once or if you do then at least make the impact so great that there is no further likelihood of a repeat event"?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *phrodite OP   Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"the greatest risks I take are when doing nothing is preferable to doing something, even though doing something would potentially yield better results.

Oh, and my life on here!"

So doing nothing most of the time can still be saucy as it can produce the risk in that short period of time when you are doing something?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's an interesting question. We all have different risk appetites which can then also vary from subject to subject.

I sometimes speed in my car (a little) but won't do extreme sports like skydiving.

I have money invested in one place but won't dream of investing anywhere else.

I'm fine with having unprotected sex, but I won't do outside or car meets.

I've left my car unlocked sometimes but can be very security conscious at other times.

I've used one drug in the past and that's the only one I'd even consider.

That's just a few examples. Interesting swings and roundabouts xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there is normalised risk that people don't really think about like driving a car. Everyone nowadays has grown up with them so they are 'normal' and not seen as risky.

Then there's the risk of new things like the web and you'll probably see a difference in risk between those who didn't grow up with it and those who have. Plus moral panics where it's seen as very risky (but if you look back over the introduction of any new technology it is seen as extremely risky until it is normalised).

Then there's the lowering of risk through alcohol/drugs/mental health. I've taken many risks due to these things (all experiences though).

Overall you can't get rid of risk but you can do as much as you can to reduce risk (very handy to remember when it comes to investing).

I wouldn't call myself a risk taker but I have taken risks.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford


"I think people are more likely to fear new or occasional risk, even when the actual risk is lower than risks that they take frequently. It's the novelty that gets our attention. And inaction is seen as safer than being proactive.

I agree because it’s our perception of the risk, or our inability to draw on past personal experiences, that makes it appear more ‘dangerous’ than the reality

True. Depends what risks. I’ll put £20 on a horse. That’s a risk. I wouldn’t jump out of a plane for a million pounds!"

But if you had £8m in the bank from jumping out of planes previously, your perception of the risk would be different

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Love this topic!

Without risk, there is no return- the higher the risk, the higher the return!

I am kind of thinking if there is no potential return then taking a risk is maybe a bit just nutty - why would you do it kind of thing? If there is something to be gained from it = ROI then it is more calculated?

Agreed xxx love your intelligence!! There are different ways to calculate the ROI , not always numerical xx

You mean the likelihood over a period of time?

Yes, the effect it will do over a period of time- short & long term! X

So ... this could help out with establishing the likelihood of a successful fabs meet over time alongside the associated risks and the bottom line will be something alphanumerical as in "Don't do it more than once or if you do then at least make the impact so great that there is no further likelihood of a repeat event"? "

Lol spot on! Shame i am not within your age range lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top