FabSwingers.com forum: How big of a deal is the next England match on Tuesday ...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I don’t follow sport at all and I don’t watch football.

How big a deal is watching the next game really from a man or women’s point of view?

For contexts...

Ex is meant to have our kids next Tuesday for the evening. He’s asking can he do another night as England is playing. Iv already made plans to go to the cinema with a friend (no tickets bought) so Iv said no as I’m busy but he’s come back saying it’s a ‘big game’ and I’m being a bit mean.

He can’t really take the kids with him to watch it properly as one of our kids is disabled and the other would be bored shitless

My friend can’t do any other week night hence not really wanting to change.

We get on fine and he’s a great dad so changing the day normally isn’t a problem.

So am I being mean? Is it actually a big deal?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my experience of watching England in the knock out stages its not worth the 2 hours of watching to be disappointed at the final result.

I haven't watched much this tournament as I don't get excited by England anymore. Maybe because I'm older. But the whole experience of going the pub having a few was always the best bit, having beer thrown all over the place when we took the lead to then being pissed off at the final whistle.

If I was you go the cinema enjoy your evening. if he thinks England will beat Germany then he will have the quarter final to look forward too down the pub and in some ways a better prospect if reaching the semi finals

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't understand it but football is important to guys, so I always compromise during football season.

I would do the change if I was you, as long as he is willing to do the same back for you

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

Is his TV at home broken?

Watching England doesn’t have to mean shouting at the big TV in a pub, I’ve watched the last 3 games at home.

It’s not so much that he wants to watch the game, it’s that he wants to go out and watch it, they’re two very different things

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

It's Germany...

It's always important

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is his TV at home broken?

Watching England doesn’t have to mean shouting at the big TV in a pub, I’ve watched the last 3 games at home.

It’s not so much that he wants to watch the game, it’s that he wants to go out and watch it, they’re two very different things"

Ha ha I don’t think his TVs are broken

Yes he wants to go out and watch it. A group of his friends are.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't understand it but football is important to guys, so I always compromise during football season.

I would do the change if I was you, as long as he is willing to do the same back for you

Yeh he’s pretty good at switching. We normally only switch if the other doesn’t have plans though

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

It's only a game. No-ones life is going to change if god forbid they do happen to win. Still at least they might stop happing on about 66 for a change!

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By *earsOfLysCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

I'm from Ireland, so I hate England.

But to be fair, it is a big game. They are also going to lose.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

England will probably lose and it’ll be the last time football will interrupt your plans. So do him the favour and ensure he’s aware he now owes you one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

They may lose.

Suppose it could be the last game ha ha

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

This is a bit of a quandary really.

Speaking personally, I’d never pass up time with my kids for anything like that, or anything for that matter!

If there’s a big game, I’ll watch it with them so I’d never do that. However I understand the positives of being flexible in co parenting and people have different priorities over their time and kids.

It is a huge game with a lot of history and significance attached but at the same time, it’s just a game

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By *rincess PhoenixWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

It's just a game. I think the question to ask him is what is more important his children or a football match. He can watch it at home it'd be different if it was the semi or final

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By *heRazorsEdgeMan
over a year ago

Wales/ All over UK

Single dad perspective here… there are events, occasions etc. that I would absolutely ask my ex if I could rearrange seeing the kids for…

So I could watch the football in the pub is NOT one of them. For context, I am a big football fan and also enjoy socialising with friends at the pub, but let’s face it, it’s not even like it’s the Final.

He can watch the game at home, maybe even get the kids involved…. Plenty of other opportunities to watch football at the pub with his mates.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's only a game. No-ones life is going to change if god forbid they do happen to win. Still at least they might stop happing on about 66 for a change! "

It definitely is onoy a game, but then again...you could switch it around and say it's only a movie

hehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is a bit of a quandary really.

Speaking personally, I’d never pass up time with my kids for anything like that, or anything for that matter!

It is a huge game with a lot of history and significance attached but at the same time, it’s just a game"

It's a tough one isn't it.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"It's only a game. No-ones life is going to change if god forbid they do happen to win. Still at least they might stop happing on about 66 for a change!

It definitely is onoy a game, but then again...you could switch it around and say it's only a movie

hehe

I dont get excited over movies either!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's only a game. No-ones life is going to change if god forbid they do happen to win. Still at least they might stop happing on about 66 for a change!

It definitely is onoy a game, but then again...you could switch it around and say it's only a movie

hehe

I dont get excited over movies either!"

lol. Was just messing

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Market Harborough / Kettering

I think it was Bill Shankly (correct me if I'm wrong) who once said "Football is not a case of life or death, its far more important than that"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is important because it's coming home

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"It is important because it's coming home"

Yes the England team without the trophy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t follow sport at all and I don’t watch football.

How big a deal is watching the next game really from a man or women’s point of view?

For contexts...

He can’t really take the kids with him to watch it properly as one of our kids is disabled and the other would be bored shitless

My friend can’t do any other week night hence not really wanting to change.

We get on fine and he’s a great dad so changing the day normally isn’t a problem.

So am I being mean? Is it actually a big deal? "

It's not going to build any bridges between you, let's put it that way.

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

It’s the Germans in a major tournament

Beat them in 66 to win the World Cup with a tight offiside call, got knocked out by then in 1990 on pens and again in 1996. Beat them in 2000 with a Alan Shearer header, got knocked out of 2010 World Cup due to a phantom goal that wasn’t given

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

Football tournaments come & go.

There is such a thing called evening highlights or youtubeor boxes that record or even old school - a video!

Kid's are with you till you die ...... Their well being is more important than watching overpaid fotballers chasing a bag of wind around the pitch.

Were there any football quotes about kids not being as important as a football game? NO!

However, there is also a famous quote about a manager being asked by a reporter whether they feared such and such a team in a tournament.

The manager replied:-

"I fear my wife more!"

Do I like football? - Yes, yhank you!

Is it a biggy? - Yes. But, there is no guarantee that England will win or even if it's stalemate that they win on penalties.....

Tell him you are protecting his health & stress levels!

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I don't really give a toss to be honest

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By *rincess PhoenixWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

"It is important because it's coming home

Yes the England team without the trophy

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

Just got my ticket for next Tuesday

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Yes it's a big game. Start of the knock outs. First instinct was couldn't he just watch it at home with the kids.

But then thought would it be that much of an imposition for you to change your cinema day?

And to those saying they'd never do that to their kids, he's just swapping a day not never seeing them again.

So I'd do him the favour and let him go watch the football.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well the trophy is actually in Wembley so it is coming home, for now...

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By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool

Quite how something than can come home, which has never lived here,is anyones guess.

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By *rincess PhoenixWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

"Yes it's a big game. Start of the knock outs. First instinct was couldn't he just watch it at home with the kids.

But then thought would it be that much of an imposition for you to change your cinema day?

And to those saying they'd never do that to their kids, he's just swapping a day not never seeing them again.

So I'd do him the favour and let him go watch the football. "

OP said her friend can only do that day

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By *ommo60Man
over a year ago

STOCKPORT

well it will be a draw..go to penalties..the inevitable will happen then you'll be pissed off..so don't bother.

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By *estmids71Man
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"I don't understand it but football is important to guys, so I always compromise during football season.

I would do the change if I was you, as long as he is willing to do the same back for you

Bit of a generalisation that it is important to guys.... There are thousands and thousands of women who attend football and watch football.... So I would say its important to gals too.....

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By *estmids71Man
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

Oh and it's a massive game.... I'd say bigger than v Scotland!!!

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

It’s just some blokes running around kicking a ball.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone will have their own view: me? Yes, it is big. Someone else will think, ah football? Meh.

Then those that think that about football might get in a frenzy over rugby whereas I can’t abide the sport. So it’s all a personal definition isn’t it?

As an ex you will know him, and what is important to him, better than we do, and also what is important to you and whether you want to compromise or not.

So just because Joe Bloggs or Mary Smith on here might say it is / isn’t important from their perspective, that’s irrelevant imho

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

It’s an old rivalry, but personally a game would never come before a child

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's just a game. I think the question to ask him is what is more important his children or a football match. He can watch it at home it'd be different if it was the semi or final"

What if he counters what’s more important the cinema or a child?

Isn’t this more about functioning effectively as a separated mother and father, not using the kids to score points? The OP has already said he’s a good Dad.

Hopefully they can agree a mutually acceptable situation and everyone wins.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/06/21 16:00:48]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Regardless of whether you like football, or England - the question was "how big is this game relative to others?"

The answer is that they just don't get any bigger than England v Germany in the knockout stage of a tournament.

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By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool

"Regardless of whether you like football, or England - the question was "how big is this game relative to others?"

The answer is that they just don't get any bigger than England v Germany in the knockout stage of a tournament."

The weird thing is..gernany dont see it as big as we do..their big rivals are Holland.

It's only here we build it up to be this huge rivalry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Regardless of whether you like football, or England - the question was "how big is this game relative to others?"

The answer is that they just don't get any bigger than England v Germany in the knockout stage of a tournament.

The weird thing is..gernany dont see it as big as we do..their big rivals are Holland.

It's only here we build it up to be this huge rivalry."

Not weird at all. Football has many examples of one way rivalries.

Particularly when one side has a far better head to head record.

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By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool

"Regardless of whether you like football, or England - the question was "how big is this game relative to others?"

The answer is that they just don't get any bigger than England v Germany in the knockout stage of a tournament.

The weird thing is..gernany dont see it as big as we do..their big rivals are Holland.

It's only here we build it up to be this huge rivalry.

Not weird at all. Football has many examples of one way rivalries.

Particularly when one side has a far better head to head record."

True dat.

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By *ickeyblueeyes7Man
over a year ago

newport

"It's Germany...

It's always important

Exactly this

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By *aseMan
over a year ago

Gourock

Who gives a feck lol

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

"I don’t follow sport at all and I don’t watch football.

How big a deal is watching the next game really from a man or women’s point of view?

For contexts...

He can’t really take the kids with him to watch it properly as one of our kids is disabled and the other would be bored shitless

My friend can’t do any other week night hence not really wanting to change.

We get on fine and he’s a great dad so changing the day normally isn’t a problem.

So am I being mean? Is it actually a big deal? "

Plans were made and plans needs to be kept, just tell him they will lose on penalties like last time.

Enjoy the film.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

If it were my ex I would have suggested changing his day for having the children.

It's a big deal to some.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

TBH whilst I get that it helps to garner wider opinion. There are many differing opinions in this forum. Most of which are irrelevant as they don’t apply to your particular circs.

Obvs it is important enough to your ex who by your own words is a good Dad and you get on. The cinema will still be there in a few weeks. The England game won’t.

This is coming from a mildly football fan who’s not bothered watching any of the matches to date.

I don’t buy the ‘kids come first’ comments - that’s a given if there is no choice - but (hypothetically) unless they are terminally ill then they’ll also be around next week too.

How about you swap, and he buys the cinema tickets and a nice meal after for you and your friend.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest I would swap.

You say you get on fine and he's a good dad so as its once every 2 years (I'm including the world cup) id say yes.

I get that people might think "he should see his kids rather than watch football" but we have all been through so much the last 18 months and all just want a bit of "normal".

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

If there is no way he can watch it just say if they win then he has quarter finals to look forward to. If they lose...he did not suffer!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

See .. I kinda get both points of view… it’s either going to be the last game and heartbreaking… or the 1st glorious March to that semi final…

It’s a toughie…

Football hasn’t come home yet.. it’s rummaging in it’s pockets looking for it’s keys!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

He really is a great dad to the kids so I’m

Not bothered about the asking to change days. I also ask to change sometimes but we normally only say yes if the other has no plans.

So Iv asked my friend if she would mind coming to mine instead and having a takeaway and a catch up. She’s happy with this so Iv told my ex he can go out and watch the football and have the kids a different night.

He’s grateful and has thanked me... even offered to pay for our takeaway as a sorry for being a pain.

Our daughter doesn’t care which night she sees him as long as she does and she’s happy she’s getting dominos next week now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He really is a great dad to the kids so I’m

Not bothered about the asking to change days. I also ask to change sometimes but we normally only say yes if the other has no plans.

He’s grateful and has thanked me... even offered to pay for our takeaway as a sorry for being a pain.

Our daughter doesn’t care which night she sees him as long as she does and she’s happy she’s getting dominos next week now.

Sounds like a brilliant comprise and free pizza just tops it off.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"He really is a great dad to the kids so I’m

Not bothered about the asking to change days. I also ask to change sometimes but we normally only say yes if the other has no plans.

He’s grateful and has thanked me... even offered to pay for our takeaway as a sorry for being a pain.

Our daughter doesn’t care which night she sees him as long as she does and she’s happy she’s getting dominos next week now.

Sounds like a brilliant comprise and free pizza just tops it off.

He just knows our daughter would give up her soul for pizza

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

"He really is a great dad to the kids so I’m

Not bothered about the asking to change days. I also ask to change sometimes but we normally only say yes if the other has no plans.

He’s grateful and has thanked me... even offered to pay for our takeaway as a sorry for being a pain.

Our daughter doesn’t care which night she sees him as long as she does and she’s happy she’s getting dominos next week now.

Sounds like a brilliant comprise and free pizza just tops it off.

He just knows our daughter would give up her soul for pizza

Sounds like a much better compromise than digging heels in.

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