FabSwingers.com forum: Funny excuses only

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Obviously most people have or have had, "Not meeting" on there profile in the last 18 months, But what funny excuse would you give for not meeting, keep em funn fabbers

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

My arse smells like something died up there, and I ain't holding my farts in for any cunt

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By *uriouscouple83Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

I would love to meet but I am too busy grooming my Alpaca at the moment.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

After seeing a chav in Asda shrug and say ‘it’s my asthma init’ when asked why he wasn’t wearing a mask , I now use this excuse for everything. So I’d just shrug and say “it’s my asthma init’

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I am in Azerbaijan consoling weeping Turks

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

Sorry I'm trimming my face fur tonight

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm having my anal warts lanced and my piles drained.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Im really a woman

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By *uper SaiyanMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Its not me.... its you.

Works every time

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By *XSnoopy72XXMan
over a year ago

lots of places

Sorry I have a dad bod

That seems to working a lately

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

We're watching the Scotland match

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

I only have sex with Minotaurs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Last nights ruby has backfired big time and I've had to call a plumber to replace the toilet

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

We've just had a fuck, and his cock is charging up until tomorrow

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I have to water the mogwai

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

I’ve got a trait. Where when I come across idiots I shout out wanker a lot

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By *uper SaiyanMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"I have to water the mogwai "

Lol if I heard this I would run. I take it you feed it all hours of the night too?

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Sorry, I have Athletes Vagine

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I washed away in the shower

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Before we meet, I should really show you a face pic...

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By *traight_no_iceMan
over a year ago

Stoke

I could not find my keys, only to realise much later that they were stuck on my recently vaccinated arm.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Ice had my toenails plaited together and now I can't walk

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I'm polishing the washing machine drum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Obviously most people have or have had, "Not meeting" on there profile in the last 18 months, But what funny excuse would you give for not meeting, keep em funn fabbers

I was crossing the road when i was run over by Dominic Cummings who was out jogging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got gonorrhea. Someone told me it was a medicine for my diarrhea...

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I overdid it doing zumba in the living room. I huffed and I puffed and I blew the house down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Photoshopped two legs but only have one and now I'm panicking.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I'm busy digging your grave

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Im having a threesome, with the voices in my head

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm pickling herrings

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm pickling herrings

"
Sounds fishy too me

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I've a meeting with old yeller and I'm loading my gun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My hamsters wheel is broken so I have to stay at home spinning it for him.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"My hamsters wheel is broken so I have to stay at home spinning it for him."

I snortled

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
over a year ago

North West

I'm making rhubarb chutney.

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

I'm plaiting my chest hair.

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