FabSwingers.com forum: Essential post apocalyptic survival skills

By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

What do you bring to the table?

Cannot include repopulation and sexual services.

Has to be something that can be useful to humanity and the survival of the human race.

There's no electricity,so no computers and requirements for office staff, so see you later admin and HR your banished to the wasteland with the mutants and zombie's,same with the IT department and accounts, influences and anyone who makes a living from dopey YouTube videos.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course all you need to do is..

Take car. Go to mum's. Kill Phillip (sorry phillip) grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over.

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By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"Of course all you need to do is..

Take car. Go to mum's. Kill Phillip (sorry phillip) grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over.

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By *eyondhornyMan
over a year ago

Abercynon-ish

"Of course all you need to do is..

Take car. Go to mum's. Kill Phillip (sorry phillip) grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over.

I also have a moderate sized vinyl collection that I can throw as a deterrent, not the Batman soundtrack unfortunately.

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

It’s sad to think that all the skills I have become useless in a zombie apocalypse and I’d be reduced to “the guy that can carry stuff”

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By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

What do you bring to the table....Have to be cake.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looks like I am banished to the wast land

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

[Removed by poster at 13/06/21 10:17:46]

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By *eyondhornyMan
over a year ago

Abercynon-ish

If we are talking about an apocalypse where people are getting, how do I put this, a bit bitey, then I have a loads of magazines that people can gaffer tape round their forearms. (not mucky magazines either, just mens health etc)

Thank you Brad Pitt in World War Z for this tip.

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By *yron69Man
over a year ago

Fareham

I once plucked and gutted a pheasant or two so feel I have the necessary skills to survive and thrive like any SAS veteran...

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

Completely overlooked the no sexual services bit of the original post.

Let's be honest, in this situation I'm a goner, but I had a decent run so it's all good.

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By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Politicians would be fucked as well.

While we would need leadership and order certainly wouldn't need a bunch of privileged toffs telling us how important they are.

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By *batMan
over a year ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

I'm good at lighting fires and know a few edible wild plants. (I'm very outdoorsy).

I also own axes if it's a zombie sort of problem.

Gbat

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By *lice MaliceWoman
over a year ago

The Facility

I can sew so I can make/alter clothes by hand and crochet blankets.

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By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"Completely overlooked the no sexual services bit of the original post.

Let's be honest, in this situation I'm a goner, but I had a decent run so it's all good."

The reason for the no repopulation is that's a given anyone who is legally fertile will be expected to breed with others sorted into males and females and everyone given a crack at everyone else

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By *arpePinguisWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

My apprenticeship coaching skills are a bit useless BUT my gardening skills would come in handy! I actually have books in hardcover to be able to share the info in a non-digital way just in case

mi d you, I think in a really bad situation I'd leave the tin of seeds and books somewhere accessible and just do away with myself. A fat fortysomething wouldn't be hugely useful overall.

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By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"I'm good at lighting fires and know a few edible wild plants. (I'm very outdoorsy).

I also own axes if it's a zombie sort of problem.

Gbat"

In this world it's not the zombies that's the problem it's the countless millions who Have no access to the internet or phones and just shuffle round aimlessly,ohh wait, Zombie's.

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By *batMan
over a year ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)

As long as there is sufficient food, the more people the better. You can learn new skills.

Gbat

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By *ud and BryanCouple
over a year ago

Boston, Lincolnshire

We have lots of replica medieval weapons and armour for protection, we're used to preparing and cooking outdoors on an open fire (and have a fire lighting kit) so we may have a fighting chance...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it's a wasteland banishing kind of apocalypse, essential kit should include a leather jacket and leather pants, a sawn off shotgun, a dingo and a black, fuel thirsty muscle car.

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By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"If it's a wasteland banishing kind of apocalypse, essential kit should include a leather jacket and leather pants, a sawn off shotgun, a dingo and a black, fuel thirsty muscle car."

Yeah it always confused me why opt for a car that probably only does 15 mpg if your lucky at a time of limited fuel supply ?

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

I have nothing

sorry for letting the side down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can knit, but only scarves! Might make it harder for zombies to bite you though.

I'm a resourceful cook and can make a decent batch meal out of any old shit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can start fires to keep us all warm.

I will need lighters, tinder, wood, petrol, BBQ starter blocks and it still might start but I'll get there eventually....

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach

I'd be pretty useful actually. Time in the Army, enjoy tinkering with engines, not too bad at woodwork and metal work, good cook, and obviously the most important can make alcohol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can set up wind and solar energy. have also set up a Reed bed sewage system so sanitation in camp won’t be an issue

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Politicians would be fucked as well.

While we would need leadership and order certainly wouldn't need a bunch of privileged toffs telling us how important they are."

Not really we can use them as kindling for the bonfires especially the fat cats they burn longer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone got everything covered, l can make tea and clean up , l wont leave dead zombies and victims in the streets, bad for morale and disease.

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

My husband is what I have.

He is very practical and intelligent - one of those people who can turn his hand to anything... his karate training will probably come in useful too.

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"My husband is what I have.

He is very practical and intelligent - one of those people who can turn his hand to anything... his karate training will probably come in useful too. "

I would be pretty useless on my own...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Help me brew some snake oil, make a killing

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

As a water and sanitation engineer that has worked all over the world providing clean water to remote communities I could probably set up a gravel filtered water purification system. It depends whether in the apocalypse we would become nomads or not, as that would require a harvesting system too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can hunt and prepare small mammals and birds.

Good at making fires

I know lots about plants, so foraging for and growing food is no issue

Unfortunately I cannot help with repopulating the earth as I've been sterilised.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can build a house from scratch, but I won’t touch the plumbing or electrics, I’ll leave the damp proof membrane for Meli to put in, that’s her area of Expertise.

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

I've been preparing for this day all my life.

I can cook, sew, have butchery skills... I'm pretty resourceful when it comes to upcycling...

I've a gun and I know how to use it

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By *unandfriendship4uMan
over a year ago

sheffield

Im ex mil. Worked around the yanks for many years . So kind of up to date with the zombi end world stuff lol.

So what would i bring. Survival skills. Leadership. Disciple so some you BDSM couples won't miss out lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm very good at shoplifting and will steal a knife for people who have no weapons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

I'm quite good at scavenging .. tinkering and fixing things til they're totally fucked

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"What do you bring to the table?

Cannot include repopulation and sexual services.

Has to be something that can be useful to humanity and the survival of the human race.

Even though I am an IT guy by trade, I am also very much an engineer and improvisation is my superpower. Electricity is no problem, there are many ways we can generate electricity.

Also, I am a drummer... so I've got long range communications covered too

Cal

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By * Sophie xTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby

I'm an engineer so I'm sorted thanks and also highly domesticated too so I'd be on the lookout for someone who can hunt, farm and who has weapons in the case of a zombie apocalypse

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By *imbo59seMan
over a year ago

North Norfolk area

Have guns....?

Ammunition...?

Fishing gear...?

Cookery skills...?

Makes booze...? ?

I'm alright thanks

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By *imbo59seMan
over a year ago

North Norfolk area

(why do my ticks come up as question marks)

Grrrrrr

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"My husband is what I have.

He is very practical and intelligent - one of those people who can turn his hand to anything... his karate training will probably come in useful too.

I would be pretty useless on my own..."

Actually, tell a lie, I'm a pretty good shot, so will just need a gun and a supply of suitable ammunition... happy to shoot zombies and animals for food.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive got a lot of firearms... (and licenses for them, before anyone asks!!), butchery skills, cooking skills and first aid skills..... and im a great shag!!

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"(why do my ticks come up as question marks)

Grrrrrr"

The emojis and characters on your phone aren't compatible with Fab.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"I'm an engineer so I'm sorted thanks and also highly domesticated too so I'd be on the lookout for someone who can hunt, farm and who has weapons in the case of a zombie apocalypse

Speaking as an engineer... pretty much everything is a weapon

Also, farming is just engineering with plants, and hunting is engineering animals into a meal.

Cal

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By *imbo59seMan
over a year ago

North Norfolk area

"(why do my ticks come up as question marks)

Grrrrrr

The emojis and characters on your phone aren't compatible with Fab."

I came to that conclusion as well, but thanks.

Felt so proud that I'd found a tick (not the nasty little bugs.....found one of them on one of my dogs this morning).

Obviously, IT skills are a bit lacking

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By *he AmbassadorMan
over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

I was a chippy once, suppose I still am even if I have a cushy job now,

Bushcraft, check

Knife maker check

And I'm converting a campervan as a lock down project so I can sort out the solar panels so we get electricity to power up the pcs and can watch porn,

Ohh i can cook 2

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"(why do my ticks come up as question marks)

Grrrrrr"

You can only use the Fab enojiis not the ones on your phone.

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan
over a year ago

Torquay

I'd make a very good zombie apocalypse mid management executive, they will be vital as I'm sure we all appreciate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was a chippy once, suppose I still am even if I have a cushy job now,

Bushcraft, check

Knife maker check

And I'm converting a campervan as a lock down project so I can sort out the solar panels so we get electricity to power up the pcs and can watch porn,

Ohh i can cook 2

Wanna be on my apocalypse team?? Got the firearms and a fair few slabs... and the skills... and a decent wok....!!

I'll go wrench the garlic up, pack the salt, clean knickers and I'm all yours, baby!

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan
over a year ago

Torquay

"I was a chippy once, suppose I still am even if I have a cushy job now,

Bushcraft, check

Knife maker check

And I'm converting a campervan as a lock down project so I can sort out the solar panels so we get electricity to power up the pcs and can watch porn,

Ohh i can cook 2

Wanna be on my apocalypse team?? Got the firearms and a fair few slabs... and the skills... and a decent wok....!!

I'll go wrench the garlic up, pack the salt, clean knickers and I'm all yours, baby!

You'll be needing my middle management executive skills of course, might even manage some accountancy for you, no promises on that of course

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By *he AmbassadorMan
over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

"I was a chippy once, suppose I still am even if I have a cushy job now,

Bushcraft, check

Knife maker check

And I'm converting a campervan as a lock down project so I can sort out the solar panels so we get electricity to power up the pcs and can watch porn,

Ohh i can cook 2

Wanna be on my apocalypse team?? Got the firearms and a fair few slabs... and the skills... and a decent wok....!!

I'll go wrench the garlic up, pack the salt, clean knickers and I'm all yours, baby!

"
hell yea,

Ohh I can shoot, glock and sig mostly,

And have the first aid thing cornerd between us,

Leave the knickers behind,

Pack the whacker though

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By * Sophie xTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby

"Ive got a lot of firearms... (and licenses for them, before anyone asks!!), butchery skills, cooking skills and first aid skills..... and im a great shag!!

Perfect!!!

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By * Sophie xTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby

"I'm an engineer so I'm sorted thanks and also highly domesticated too so I'd be on the lookout for someone who can hunt, farm and who has weapons in the case of a zombie apocalypse

Speaking as an engineer... pretty much everything is a weapon

Also, farming is just engineering with plants, and hunting is engineering animals into a meal.

Cal

Well of course this is very true but then until there is a zombie apocalypse I don't want to scare anyone off, I mean nobody wants to think you can simply make them dissappear in real life

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

I can be that annoying guy who pulls out a guitar around the camp fire.

Kumbayaaaa...

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Well I'm stuffed as i can't even help repopulation. I will have to revive the oldest profession.

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

I won't have to worry about no electricity as I have a Tunturi exercise bike with a massive flywheel driving an old DC washing machine motor as a a generator. Charges 12V systems perfectly but is much harder work than anyone imagines, so will get nice and fit but need more food as a result.

Not much food growing in my garden. Just eaten the last asparagus and now nothing until the apples are ripe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I won't have to worry about no electricity as I have a Tunturi exercise bike with a massive flywheel driving an old DC washing machine motor as a a generator. Charges 12V systems perfectly but is much harder work than anyone imagines, so will get nice and fit but need more food as a result.

Not much food growing in my garden. Just eaten the last asparagus and now nothing until the apples are ripe."

Its all good! Ive got strawberries....

And ill grab the pork pies out the fridge!

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

"Well I'm stuffed as i can't even help repopulation. I will have to revive the oldest profession. "

Happily be your oldest punter but I note that, outside post apocalyptic circumstances, you have an age limit of 60!

Might need putting up overnight as Reading is a long way to cycle there and back in one day!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go get guns and off to friends in the middle of nowhere

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

...

Its all good! Ive got strawberries....

And ill grab the pork pies out the fridge!

The good news is that I've got a 12V fridge available.

The bad news is that one of us will have to pedal power the 60 or so Watts it needs!

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By *manaWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

"Of course all you need to do is..

Take car. Go to mum's. Kill Phillip (sorry phillip) grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over.

This

And double tap!!

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By *lipy123TV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

No pver 60's who's going to tell you where your going wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hunting, fishing, making shelters, lighting fires and guns....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got a fb that makes scones so hard we can use em as weapons

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I got a fb that makes scones so hard we can use em as weapons "

Useful against zombies!

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