FabSwingers.com forum: The challenges of being bi

By *G6curious OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

I’m recently single and am now facing the prospect of having to date again. I only want a romantic relationship with a girl but have had a few MM experiences and am tempted to do so in the future. If I’m in a relationship, I would remain faithful but am concerned that if I’m open to any future partner about being bi, that she will presume that I’ll be unfaithful and therefore she’ll want to end things with me.

Therefore, my question is when is the best time to be open about being bi (I’m not out)?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you'd need to chat about bi people with her to test her reaction. The problem is she may out you.

Or she may love the idea of bi MMF and you could have a wonderful time together.

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By *aggy dollsCouple
over a year ago

Bradford

I told luna on the 1st or second conversation we had, got balls me you know

Mr H.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

"I’m recently single and am now facing the prospect of having to date again. I only want a romantic relationship with a girl but have had a few MM experiences and am tempted to do so in the future. If I’m in a relationship, I would remain faithful but am concerned that if I’m open to any future partner about being bi, that she will presume that I’ll be unfaithful and therefore she’ll want to end things with me.

Therefore, my question is when is the best time to be open about being bi (I’m not out)?"

I would be open pretty early on. I hate secrets much more than i hate whatever it is they are keeping secret. She has to accept you for you or its a non starter.

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By *melia DominaTV/TS
over a year ago

Edinburgh (She/Her)

If you think a future partner will suspect you are cheating before you even get to the relationship....

Looking inward, are you ready for a monogamous relationship?

Do you want a monogamous relationship?

FAB is about sharing sexual experience while investing love in your primary relationship.

FAB is also about communication within relationships.

Perhaps future communication is a barrier or you are afraid to communicate with a future partner.

Most men are terrible at communication in relationships. They are always told to not show or talk about feelings and emotions.

Perhaps you need to find an outlet to share and communicate through.

FAB forums are a start. But physical communication is better. That way you can feel the body language and facial expressions also.

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By *anther81Man
over a year ago

Drogheda

Yeah is a bit of a tricky one alright not sure if you can go “ I like movies, football, music and cock.”

I do also think there would be that element of he’s bi so he’s going to have sex with a guy.

Am sure there are ladies out there that would be fine with it and even into it but would guess hard to find.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you'd need to chat about bi people with her to test her reaction. The problem is she may out you.

Or she may love the idea of bi MMF and you could have a wonderful time together.

That’s definitely the best outcome. Finding out MissJ fancied two guys at once and had always assumed I was a bit bi was very horny and exciting for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is this something you want in your life? As in, sex with more people than your partner, some of whom may be the same gender? If it is, then seek out a relationship with a woman who likes this.

Is it possible to use a dating app which starts anonymous and say from the start what you want?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Therefore, my question is when is the best time to be open about being bi (I’m not out)?"

If you had a relationship with an openly bi woman would you be concerned that she'd cheat on you with another woman?

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By *issysbee69Woman
over a year ago

Brandenburg

I am Saying that I am not Bi but Bi Curious and I have been with couple but not just a girl

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By *SCouple81Couple
over a year ago

Between Edinburgh and Scottish Borders

The best you can do is being honest, with others and yourself. I have recently chatted with some guy online who is bi but his wife doesn't accept it even if she is bi. I felt really sorry for him.

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By *issAphroditeWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

I think there is a misconception that of you're bi, by only being with one sex, you are being deprived of your craving for the other sex and will therefore cheat to satisfy that need.

Being bi shouldn't have any bearing on a person's ability to be monogamous - being straight certainly hasn't kept all the cheating husbands out of here!

My feeling is that any "bombshell" should come early doors before too much bonding has taken place, so it's easier to move on if said bombshell isn't going to work between you.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Did you tell your previous girlfriend you are bi ?

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By *G6curious OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

"Did you tell your previous girlfriend you are bi ?"

I did tell my previous girlfriend I’m bi. I told her on our second date and we lasted ten years.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Did you tell your previous girlfriend you are bi ?

I did tell my previous girlfriend I’m bi. I told her on our second date and we lasted ten years."

So you have no need to be nervous this time !

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By *G6curious OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

"If you think a future partner will suspect you are cheating before you even get to the relationship....

Looking inward, are you ready for a monogamous relationship?

Do you want a monogamous relationship?

FAB is about sharing sexual experience while investing love in your primary relationship.

FAB is also about communication within relationships.

Perhaps future communication is a barrier or you are afraid to communicate with a future partner.

Most men are terrible at communication in relationships. They are always told to not show or talk about feelings and emotions.

Perhaps you need to find an outlet to share and communicate through.

FAB forums are a start. But physical communication is better. That way you can feel the body language and facial expressions also.

I’m really comfortable communicating and being open but I’m mindful of sending a red flag too early, if me being bi doesn’t actually need to be an issue

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

From the beginning. Weeds out the biphobic people from the beginning. Do you really want to date someone who thinks bisexual people are more likely to cheat? In my opinion, it's far better to put off these people from the get go than try to later convince someone with those sorts of harmful opinions that they're wrong.

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

I told Mrs C pretty much right away. V of she'd had a problem with it is wouldn't have wanted to stick around I reckon

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"I think there is a misconception that of you're bi, by only being with one sex, you are being deprived of your craving for the other sex and will therefore cheat to satisfy that need.

Being bi shouldn't have any bearing on a person's ability to be monogamous - being straight certainly hasn't kept all the cheating husbands out of here!

My feeling is that any "bombshell" should come early doors before too much bonding has taken place, so it's easier to move on if said bombshell isn't going to work between you."

This!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there is a misconception that of you're bi, by only being with one sex, you are being deprived of your craving for the other sex and will therefore cheat to satisfy that need.

Being bi shouldn't have any bearing on a person's ability to be monogamous - being straight certainly hasn't kept all the cheating husbands out of here!

My feeling is that any "bombshell" should come early doors before too much bonding has taken place, so it's easier to move on if said bombshell isn't going to work between you."

This ^^^

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By *G6curious OP Man
over a year ago

Wirral

"From the beginning. Weeds out the biphobic people from the beginning. Do you really want to date someone who thinks bisexual people are more likely to cheat? In my opinion, it's far better to put off these people from the get go than try to later convince someone with those sorts of harmful opinions that they're wrong. "

Really good point

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

M knew I was bi before we even got together so it's never been an issue. I agree with some above that people presume as a couple we're looking for another female on here just because I'm bi. When in fact I want MFM, so many misconceptions how and what bi people want. It's varied as.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As soon as possible when conversations turn to sexual topics. People have right to make informed choices. And you want this to progress to more than sex. So honesty is crucial. And you want to be accepted fully, as it's meant to be fulfilling relationship. If you start with a lie about yourself, how will that happen? If you reject part of yourself, would that make you happy or just comfortable in the knowledge you'll get more acceptance? Sorry, so many questions, probably not helpful. I just wonder.. how one can open to love and acceptance not allowing that to themselves. Not saying that is what you do, but I hope you find what you seek without ever compromising on your integrity.

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple
over a year ago

Pembrokeshire

"I think you'd need to chat about bi people with her to test her reaction. The problem is she may out you.

Or she may love the idea of bi MMF and you could have a wonderful time together.

My thoughts on it, exactly!

all the best with your future however it pans out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That. Plus any other misconceptions they might hold. So much energy spent trying to change someone's views when you can find it all and feel worthy elsewhere.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

I tell all of my partners that I cross dress fully. It’s not something I bring up on the first date, but I don’t hide a side of me I have to indulge in occasionally.

So your issue is similar to mine I can’t hide who I am, so neither should you. I generally look around the time that I am making regular plans with her to tell her. The minute you realise that this dating has moved or moving to the next stage.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

I still don't get why you think she would think you'd cheat on her just with a man? If she thinks you're prone to cheating surely the gender wouldnt matter.

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

How would being bi make you more likely to cheat?

I don't understand how someone would jump to that conclusion.

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

"I told Mrs C pretty much right away. V of she'd had a problem with it is wouldn't have wanted to stick around I reckon"

Ugh. *If she'd have had a problem...

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