FabSwingers.com forum: Lockdown loss of confidence

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Now lockdown is easing and life is returning to a some form of normal is anyone else feeling like they have lost their confidence?

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By *olieandSlaveCouple
over a year ago

Stafford

Yes, absolutely.

Both body confidence and socially

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now lockdown is easing and life is returning to a some form of normal is anyone else feeling like they have lost their confidence?

In what way?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely, it's becoming a reality of meeting again now so its only natural to have these feelings. I wouldn't say I've lost mine but it's definitely been dented and it's a scary thought being with someone again after all this time.

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

Yup. I'm hoping it returns once I can get back in to the gym properly

LvM

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, in all ways. Hopefully it will return x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No confidence pandemic or not :-/

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep definitely! I seem to not engage in conversation as much on here and in person. Just incase it turns into a meet up.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

I haven’t lost my confidence. I’ve just lost interest in some of the things that were ‘normal’ before. I’m in no rush to fill my life up with things that I do because I felt obligated.

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

(taps head) can't lose what you never had.

Seriously, of course, it's always gonna affect you in one way or another. I guess the good news is that many will feel just the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes, absolutely.

Both body confidence and socially"

Yes, I have a terrible feeling of anxiety when I think about going anywhere where other people are. I went into a cafe for the first time the other day and I was shaking. It's ridiculous

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

The end of my last relationship coincided with the first lockdown and it floored me.

My confidence is in the gutter when it comes to the opposite sex but I'm in no rush to gain it, coz in truth I see meeting as hassle on my psyche I really don't need. I may be momentarily happier when I've a connection with someone but ultimately it isn't good for my mental health or my soul.

I've confidence in my ability at work. First week back and I've smashed it, lost 2lb and although I'm shattered I feel I achieved.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"(taps head) can't lose what you never had.

Seriously, of course, it's always gonna affect you in one way or another. I guess the good news is that many will feel just the same. "

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

"I haven’t lost my confidence. I’ve just lost interest in some of the things that were ‘normal’ before. I’m in no rush to fill my life up with things that I do because I felt obligated. "
exactly this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Something feels off, can’t quite put my finger on it. Don’t feel my normal self. Will take time when everything open up to re adjust.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very much so. Never had much confidence to start anyway so yeah I’m nervous and seem to be holding off

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

With every that has gone on this year so far, and not just lockdown, my confidence has taken a beating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely. Literally dont want to socialize whatso ever

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

"Absolutely. Literally dont want to socialize whatso ever

we're all in the same boat x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Absolutely. Literally dont want to socialize whatso ever

we're all in the same boat x"

Sadly yes, hoping that fab helps x

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

Physically I'm ok I think, mentally it's more I've not had interaction with others for a long while, I'll probably just sit there with a gormless smile on my face and giggle

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By *hoenix CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northallerton

I think that Mrs P has lost alot of confidence during lockdown and its going to take time to get it it back and meet people again. I am finding that lots of guys don't understand this, but there again they are probably not the guys for us.

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By *lueEyesEnigmaMan
over a year ago

Dublin

Agreed...its been an opportunity to reflect on what's is important...what you do and don't need in your life. Ultimately what positive things make you happy.

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By *ittleMissCali_MrDJCouple
over a year ago

wonderland.

I'm finding I'm much more affected than I thought. Mr is suffering too. I'm even worried about just socially meeting.

Cali

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By *tew008Man
over a year ago

edinburgh

Pretty much, been enjoying the time to go camping and gradually becoming a hermit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes definitely, I was just beginning to push myself to be more daring and maybe even go to a party when Covid struck. Now I have lost confidence and just hate my body again, Ady is understanding and I want to be naughty but not easy at the moment.

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

I feel no different. Totally ready to pick up where I left off, once it's safe to do so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ive said before us men can shrug things off like weight and problems.

i know some women (not all) cannot and they get down and feel unattractive.

not easy when you look at some of the people and think to yourself i will never look like that.

we defeat ourselves with overthinking too much.

all of us have an attraction, we may not know it. but you do.

stop drowning. pull yourself up and float for a bit.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

A gentleman I chat to regularly on here has mentioned feeling a bit unsure about things going back to normal and being around people again. You're not alone OP.

I think it’s a normal reaction after all the things we’ve heard and seen over the past year or so, we’ve all built up a wall around ourselves and we have to slowly take it down again.

You’ll get there, just take as much time as you need and go at things at your own pace.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

I wondering how I'm going to perform after so long but I'm sure will get into the swing of things before long.

Having said that I'm also excited to start meeting again

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By *S2004Man
over a year ago

Bromsgrove

Absolutely. Going back to a club will feel like the first time all over again, at least from the nerves point of view

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure I've lost confidence, more weary (if that's the right word) of getting out and about. Silly I know, but that's where I'm at with things at moment.

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By *dquestCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

Time to get our collective mojo back!

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

I'm not feeling sorry for myself nor do I expect sympathy.

I've not lost confidence more a case of can't be bothered....I'm still positive and optimistic and when I can't, then realistic!

I seem to lack motivation I guess???? Apathy or indiference may be a better explanation. I feel nothing just stone cold. Outside a fish bowl looking in perhaps.

I have goals & objectives both personal & where I want to go... It's just that the climate ain't right at the moment!

I'll remain balanced & confused until we are directed otherwise.... and yes I can think for myself too thanks!

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By *issChief 200Woman
over a year ago

South West

I've definately lost my MissChief Mojo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not feeling sorry for myself nor do I expect sympathy.

I've not lost confidence more a case of can't be bothered....I'm still positive and optimistic and when I can't, then realistic!

I seem to lack motivation I guess???? Apathy or indiference may be a better explanation. I feel nothing just stone cold. Outside a fish bowl looking in perhaps.

I have goals & objectives both personal & where I want to go... It's just that the climate ain't right at the moment!

I'll remain balanced & confused until we are directed otherwise.... and yes I can think for myself too thanks!

I can totally relate.

Im the person who still hasn't stepped foot in an non essential shop and hasn't eaten out in a restaurant.

I did go to the gym for the first time today but it did feel weird.

I guess with all the uncertainty of the last year I'd rather have some certainty before I dive back in to my old normality.

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"I'm not feeling sorry for myself nor do I expect sympathy.

I've not lost confidence more a case of can't be bothered....I'm still positive and optimistic and when I can't, then realistic!

I seem to lack motivation I guess???? Apathy or indiference may be a better explanation. I feel nothing just stone cold. Outside a fish bowl looking in perhaps.

I have goals & objectives both personal & where I want to go... It's just that the climate ain't right at the moment!

I'll remain balanced & confused until we are directed otherwise.... and yes I can think for myself too thanks!

I can totally relate.

Im the person who still hasn't stepped foot in an non essential shop and hasn't eaten out in a restaurant.

I did go to the gym for the first time today but it did feel weird.

I guess with all the uncertainty of the last year I'd rather have some certainty before I dive back in to my old normality.

If it's any reassurance at all, I'm in a similar boat – supermarket, post office, doctor's, that's it. I've basically been behaving throughout as though the first lockdown never lifted. I'm fortunate that my circumstances have allowed me to conduct my life in such a strictly responsible manner.

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

I did at first. But theres no pressure OP. Shape your world to fit your pace and go easy. You'll be OK. There's no need to 'get back to how you were'.

It's natural that we reassess and readjust to what is now ..and maybe you know yourself a bit better, what you like and don't like.

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By *rMojoRisinMan
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I've definately lost my MissChief Mojo

Perhaps I could lend you some of mine?

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By *olymalelincsMan
over a year ago

southend

Yup know the feeling well, confidence wasn't a strong point to begin with in all honesty but definately lost some of what I did have.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve gone the other way, before the pandemic I had little to no confidence but over the last year I’ve been building myself up and for the most part feel better than I have

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve gone the other way, before the pandemic I had little to no confidence but over the last year I’ve been building myself up and for the most part feel better than I have"

Love this!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes ... because of someone else though !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably a bit more cynical, than lost confidence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ive said before us men can shrug things off like weight and problems.

i know some women (not all) cannot and they get down and feel unattractive.

not easy when you look at some of the people and think to yourself i will never look like that.

we defeat ourselves with overthinking too much.

all of us have an attraction, we may not know it. but you do.

*** stop drowning. pull yourself up and float for a bit. ***

*** I really like this!!

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

As much as I want to go out again I know I’ve put on some weight over the lockdown. So not too keen on going out just now, once I get back to the gym and do some more running I will I feel a bit better about myself.

So for someone who’s normally quite confident and optimistic I have actually had some self doubt recently. So totally empathetic with all are feeling the same now.

Let’s hope it’s a great summer, so the pandemic and its after affects are a distance memory.

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By *BWBI2019Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

Didn't have much to begin with but I would say, it's gotten alot worse. Trying to take baby steps to become more social and to boost my self esteem! Hope you're able to regain some confidence OP!

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By *uvhandle20Man
over a year ago

SE London

Yes, I gained weight during lock-down and need to find the confidence of meeting people again. Then I will find out how confident I am with sex and stimulation.

The mind is willing but the body is not ready yet

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By *ySweetLadyWoman
over a year ago

London

Another one who’s lost the little confidence I had to start with.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

Not at all. Life goes on and life is good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine is slowly building up again

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Not at all. Life goes on and life is good

I'm with you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Luckily for me I’ve managed to keep working so this has helped me not going insane at least but I understand other people predicaments here and fully appreciated that it’s been a very difficult 18 months nearly, all I can say it breathe and take one thing at a time life is a journey and every road is a cross road only you can make the correct choice for you

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

It's given me time to focus on what's really important, and the opportunity to do things I really love

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By *uietly_KinkyMan
over a year ago

High Wycombe

Very much so. I know I've put on weight (and I wasn't a skinny minnie beforehand) and I suspect my social anxiety is worse than it was after more than a year stuck at home.

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

Nope. Not in the slightest. I've got a new job, was asked by the US VP to move into a better role while I was still on induction, and I've just had the exciting news that the dance troupe I'm in has a gig at a festival next month. I can't bloody wait. The only thing I need is for travel restrictions to do one and I'll be fandabbydozy

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Nope. Not in the slightest. I've got a new job, was asked by the US VP to move into a better role while I was still on induction, and I've just had the exciting news that the dance troupe I'm in has a gig at a festival next month. I can't bloody wait. The only thing I need is for travel restrictions to do one and I'll be fandabbydozy

I'm really pleased for you..sounds like amazing opportunities, good luck with them x

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I'm really pleased for you..sounds like amazing opportunities, good luck with them x"

Thank you...I'm embracing them and feeling satisfied that my previous hard work has paid off and led to this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Misread a situation at last meet. Didnt help my confidence level at all

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"Not at all. Life goes on and life is good

I'm with you

Great minds

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

My confidence feels the same but I have found that the hermit lifestyle could well be difficult to break out of

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my mrs has, she won’t leave the house unless it’s absolutely necessary

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By *inkylipsWoman
over a year ago

Debauchery

In meeting people yes definitely

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If that’s how you feel, it’s completely valid. Lots of people have lost confidence, me included. We’ve had a horribly tough year, been isolated and alone, and have learnt to live as more solitary people, and now we have to unlearn that, whilst grieving the lives we have lost, and it *is/can be* grief, and sadness and sorrow.

Be kind to yourselves

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes..totàlly, (mrs)....feel that if i meet someone now they will be disappointed..don't feel attractive anymore.

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