FabSwingers.com forum: Measuring your penis??

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I know many men do this, surely I’m not the only who’s never measured my cock?

Just couldn’t stand and justify myself measuring my cock whilst it’s hard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Experts warn men measuring their penis accurately and correctly are still along way off.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Experts warn men measuring their penis accurately and correctly are still along way off."

I just couldn’t be like yea.. fuck it I’m measuring myself today

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By *offiaCoolWoman
over a year ago

Kidsgrove

"Experts warn men measuring their penis accurately and correctly are still along way off."

Do these experts work for Sydney university

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Last time was about 20 years ago and the results were average but since then it’s fucked a fair few women so it does what it’s meant to so it don’t really matter how big it is as long as women will fuck and suck it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Experts warn men measuring their penis accurately and correctly are still along way off.

Do these experts work for Sydney university

Made me chuckle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I do it for you with a metre stick? Just so I can tick it off my 'never done it and really want to' list.

I'm strangely lacking willing participants.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can I do it for you with a metre stick? Just so I can tick it off my 'never done it and really want to' list.

I'm strangely lacking willing participants.

Whatever floats your boat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can I do it for you with a metre stick? Just so I can tick it off my 'never done it and really want to' list.

I'm strangely lacking willing participants.

I knew you’d comment the metre stick

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 18/05/21 23:05:38]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just use a can of lynx (got to be Africa) or a sky remote!! Jobs a good'un!

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

Personally I use the sky remote

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By *am101aMan
over a year ago

swad

Why bother? You can only fuck with the prickyou got!

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Oh I’d have to know if I had one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye "

And thats enough Fab for today!

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye

And thats enough Fab for today!

That’s when it’s on the flop I must add

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye "

How did you ascertain you were dead centre in both orifices?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don't measure it then you can't tell which women you're allowed to message and which ones you're not. Guessing just isn't acceptable...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually get my lover to do that shiz with a frozen tape measure

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye

How did you ascertain you were dead centre in both orifices? "

Cause I drew some cross arrows on a mirror to assist me

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye

How did you ascertain you were dead centre in both orifices?

Cause I drew some cross arrows on a mirror to assist me

The scientist in me is getting a nervous twitch

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye

How did you ascertain you were dead centre in both orifices?

Cause I drew some cross arrows on a mirror to assist me

The scientist in me is getting a nervous twitch

That’s an engineer for you

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye

How did you ascertain you were dead centre in both orifices?

Cause I drew some cross arrows on a mirror to assist me

The scientist in me is getting a nervous twitch

That’s an engineer for you

Reassuring

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By *ffit101Man
over a year ago

Cork and West Cork

"Experts warn men measuring their penis accurately and correctly are still along way off.

Do these experts work for Sydney university

I'd love to swing with Sydney uni

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By *ilth84Man
over a year ago

Stafford

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye

How did you ascertain you were dead centre in both orifices? "

You use a pair of internal calipers to measure the diameter of the bumhole, divide it by 2 to get the radius, measure from the outer perimeter of said brown eye, then subtract the radius.

Or so ive been told

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It’s exactly 12inches from the dead centre of my bum hole to the dead centre of my japs eye

How did you ascertain you were dead centre in both orifices?

You use a pair of internal calipers to measure the diameter of the bumhole, divide it by 2 to get the radius, measure from the outer perimeter of said brown eye, then subtract the radius.

Or so ive been told

Now THERE'S an answer

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By *ffit101Man
over a year ago

Cork and West Cork

"Can I do it for you with a metre stick? Just so I can tick it off my 'never done it and really want to' list.

I'm strangely lacking willing participants.

*inbox completely changes to yellow

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

The level of moaning.

If she is moaning in orgasm,it’s good size.

If she is moaning she can’t feel anything, she has had bigger.

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By *tue555Man
over a year ago

Passed Beyond Reach

Imperial measurement, metric or FAB?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never measured and don’t what size

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By *ilth84Man
over a year ago

Stafford

"The level of moaning.

If she is moaning in orgasm,it’s good size.

If she is moaning she can’t feel anything, she has had bigger."

And if she is hysterically moaning then you've sat on the cat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why. "

Did you try turning it off and on again?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again? "

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea. "

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

"The level of moaning.

If she is moaning in orgasm,it’s good size.

If she is moaning she can’t feel anything, she has had bigger.

And if she is hysterically moaning then you've sat on the cat"

Wrong pussy?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work.

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By *ilth84Man
over a year ago

Stafford

"The level of moaning.

If she is moaning in orgasm,it’s good size.

If she is moaning she can’t feel anything, she has had bigger.

And if she is hysterically moaning then you've sat on the cat

Wrong pussy?"

Happens to the best of us

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By *ilth84Man
over a year ago

Stafford

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work. "

Just take 10 measurements, add them upanddevide them by ten, I believe thats the median method

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By *ollydoesWoman
over a year ago

Shangri-La

Well I know how big mine is, so if anyone wants to measure up against it..get a rough idea

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By *ilth84Man
over a year ago

Stafford

"Well I know how big mine is, so if anyone wants to measure up against it..get a rough idea

Looks like you are full of "rough" ideas

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work.

Just take 10 measurements, add them upanddevide them by ten, I believe thats the median method"

That's the mean

For median, you should write the values down in the order taken and find the middle value in the list

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work.

Just take 10 measurements, add them upanddevide them by ten, I believe thats the median method

That's the mean

For median, you should write the values down in the order taken and find the middle value in the list

Do I do this while trying to hold the tape measure?

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work. "

Last idea if it's still playing up - give it a good rub and get any dust off. Might be gumming up the mechanism

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By *ilth84Man
over a year ago

Stafford

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work.

Just take 10 measurements, add them upanddevide them by ten, I believe thats the median method

That's the mean

For median, you should write the values down in the order taken and find the middle value in the list

I stand corrected *puts on dunce cap and stands in the corner*

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By *ilth84Man
over a year ago

Stafford

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work.

Last idea if it's still playing up - give it a good rub and get any dust off. Might be gumming up the mechanism

A sharp blow could help to remove residue

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work.

Just take 10 measurements, add them upanddevide them by ten, I believe thats the median method

That's the mean

For median, you should write the values down in the order taken and find the middle value in the list

Do I do this while trying to hold the tape measure?"

Recruit a scribe to note down the values

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work.

Last idea if it's still playing up - give it a good rub and get any dust off. Might be gumming up the mechanism

Ok, I'll give it a go!

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By *hocCock1Man
over a year ago

Southampton

Never seen the point of measuring, not like you can swap it for another one !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It seems to change length all the time. Not sure why.

Did you try turning it off and on again?

Didn't think of that. Good idea.

If that doesn't work, jiggle the batteries around

You're full of great ideas. I think jiggling it might work.

Just take 10 measurements, add them upanddevide them by ten, I believe thats the median method

That's the mean

For median, you should write the values down in the order taken and find the middle value in the list

Do I do this while trying to hold the tape measure?

Recruit a scribe to note down the values

You'd make a great PA.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Never seen the point of measuring, not like you can swap it for another one !!"

You can buy spare and replacement penises in the shops. Some of them are really jazzy colours or have sparkly bits, if you fancy an upgrade?

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By *hocCock1Man
over a year ago

Southampton

"Never seen the point of measuring, not like you can swap it for another one !!

You can buy spare and replacement penises in the shops. Some of them are really jazzy colours or have sparkly bits, if you fancy an upgrade?

Glue on or screw on ?

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Never seen the point of measuring, not like you can swap it for another one !!

You can buy spare and replacement penises in the shops. Some of them are really jazzy colours or have sparkly bits, if you fancy an upgrade?

Glue on or screw on ?

I think you can get both screw and bayonet fittings

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By *nkforthekinkMan
over a year ago

london/fareham/brighton

"Personally I use the sky remote

Mines more virgin media remote

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