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Monkey on a car

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull

A lot of people will have seen the video Clip of child saying "monkey on the car" in an innocent voice going through the safari park.

The mum replies "monkey on the car"

To which the child replies "F..k off monkey !

Now this isn't a thread about where the child learned the language from.

It's a lighthearted thread about embarrassing things either your child has said or done or other peoples

Curly wurly for the funniest

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

My mom told me I once called a nun Batman!

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull


"My mom told me I once called a nun Batman!"

Lmao that's the perfect answer and exactly what the thread is about

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"My mom told me I once called a nun Batman!

Lmao that's the perfect answer and exactly what the thread is about "

Apparently the num thought it was funny

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

Apparently when I was a child, sat in the waiting room of our doctors surgery, a ‘large’ woman got out of her seat as she had been called up next, and in a voice that the whole room heard I exclaimed

‘Look at the size of her’

Obviously I would never do such a thing now I’m a grownup

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

More funny than embarrassing. In the chip shop with our then 3 year old there was a one legged Man. Our Son was then searching around the Man. We knew what was coming.. "Why's that Man only got one leg?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My mom told me I once called a nun Batman!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My mom told me I once called a nun Batman!"

I told my 5yrs old son that Batman wore his under-pants on the outside...I wondered what the howling laughter from other kids in our close was about when i looked out of the kitchen window....There he was standing in the middle of a bunch of girls laughing hysterically with his underpants over his trackies.

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"My mom told me I once called a nun Batman!

I told my 5yrs old son that Batman wore his under-pants on the outside...I wondered what the howling laughter from other kids in our close was about when i looked out of the kitchen window....There he was standing in the middle of a bunch of girls laughing hysterically with his underpants over his trackies."

Aww bless him!

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull


"My mom told me I once called a nun Batman!

I told my 5yrs old son that Batman wore his under-pants on the outside...I wondered what the howling laughter from other kids in our close was about when i looked out of the kitchen window....There he was standing in the middle of a bunch of girls laughing hysterically with his underpants over his trackies."

I'm going to give it a go to see if it has the same effect on grown women

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Forgot the part whare the kid will be a millionaire next week

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of my boys when he was about 3 came downstairs with my vibrator...luckily we weren't entertaining the vicar for tea at the time

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull


"One of my boys when he was about 3 came downstairs with my vibrator...luckily we weren't entertaining the vicar for tea at the time "

Lmao did you have to pretend it was a light sabre

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My step daughter when she was 5 at Alton towers saw the guy off the quiz show tenable

Then said not too loud but loud enough “”look a little daddy”

She meant absolutely no harm but we made a quick escape and went to the cafe and calmly explained

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"One of my boys when he was about 3 came downstairs with my vibrator...luckily we weren't entertaining the vicar for tea at the time "

He probably has his own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My son a few years back told the tesco delivery man that mummy loves willies.

He wasn't wrong but still I was mortified

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

When my son was about 14 he used hang out in the video shop. I was single at the time.

Anyway he came home one night and said the guy in the video shop wanted to take me out for a drink. The little shit and only told him i was single and took a photo of me down to show him. I was mortified and never went in the video shop again

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By *hesblokeMan
over a year ago

Derbyshire village

When my first was very young, we were in a Little Chef (THAT long ago) whereupon he spotted a lady with dwarfism. So he shouted (as loudly as possible) "look at that little mummy!"

We were mortified, but she smiled at him and waved and he said no more about it. The ground didn't unfortunately open up and swallow me. Ugh. Kids.

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

When I took my kids to Disney, my youngest daughter hated being in a dress (they were dressed up for a photo shoot).

Whilst I was dealing with one of the others, she ripped the dress off and started to run, so I had to give chase.

It's supringly tricky to catch a 3 year old in knickers, who is weaving in and out of all the people on the packed main street

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My 2 year old put his Teddy on 'the step'. I asked why Teddy was on the step and he told me that Teddy had done something naughty. I asked what and the reply was "he said fuckin' 'ell"....

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London


"My 2 year old put his Teddy on 'the step'. I asked why Teddy was on the step and he told me that Teddy had done something naughty. I asked what and the reply was "he said fuckin' 'ell"...."

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Friend's kid disappeared under the table in a cafe while me and his mum were chatting.

Reappeared 5 minutes later nekked.

Said he "felt hot".

His mum was mortified.

I thought it was hilarious.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Walking into an Indian restaurant with my lad who was 5 at the time

I grabbed his nose and said "pwaaaar, it stinks in here"

Cheers kiddo

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Went to a cafe in Rotherham when my kid was about 6. Ald fella with a broad Yorkshire accent on the next table struck up conversation.

Child looked at him, looked at me and asked "What language is he speaking, mummy?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i love this thread , wish they would bring back kids say the funniest things for tv

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By *ear in the chairMan
over a year ago

yeah there

Our 10 yr old many moons ago wrote cunt in the condensation of the bathroom mirror... he was just experimenting and didn't realise next shower it would reappear

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By *ogueAngelMan
over a year ago

Near Bath / Bristol

My daughter is full of these. Once when she was about 4 years old her mother was reversing out of a tight parking space and nobody was giving way. After a couple of minutes my daughter piped up, "are you quite alright in the front there? Do you need a hand?"

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"My daughter is full of these. Once when she was about 4 years old her mother was reversing out of a tight parking space and nobody was giving way. After a couple of minutes my daughter piped up, "are you quite alright in the front there? Do you need a hand?" "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was with my boys mum he picked up a bra in a shop started swinging it around his head shouting at the top of his voice boobie knickers boobie knickers mummy wants some boobie knickers

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull


"i love this thread , wish they would bring back kids say the funniest things for tv "

Thank you, just try to do something different on here.

Sadly it doesn't get as much interest as sex related posts ! Lol

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I was in a shop and on my list was tampax. At the top of his voice he said there those things you put up up your bum. Why do they have to be so loud

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

Our youngest Daughter kept calling the Tesco delivery driver "Daddy" when she was a toddler...

She also came running downstairs once waving a butt-plug around when the Mother-In-Law was here (she had somehow managed to get into my top drawer).

That was fun!...

- Amy. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when my niece was very young she saw a dwarfed/midget person and said “look at that big person”

It was funny at the time because of how small she was and ended well because got the dwarfed/midget person laughing and chatting to us

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