FabSwingers.com forum: It’s all a bit...

By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in0 the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it"

Probably best i dont...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The potential opening of the floodgates with the relaxation of lockdown has anticipation running high, yet so many people are out of practice with socialising etc that there may be an element of anxiety creeping in.

Nellie, however has no such qualms and has packed her trunk and plans for joining the circus are still on track.

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

Cant say I have noticed anything out of the ordinary

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

Is it tense? I've not noticed anything.

Then again I pop in and out and might miss a fair bit.

This is escapism for a great many people and should be fun and not heavy or loaded.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree buddy, ive had a case of the blues myself so mostly been rolling my eyes and biting my tongue. Theres not been as many fun threads as usual... i wonder if the 'going back to work blues' have hit?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What elephant?

Forums always seem tense unless after 6pm when many are off their trolleys on supermarket shandy. Then they are giddy happy.

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By *offiaCoolWoman
over a year ago

Kidsgrove

I haven't noticed anything, there have certainly been worse days on here

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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

You do like stirring the pot, don’t you? ...

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Bliss

Its been tense for weeks, I just put it down to lots of people having lots of shit going on atm, the normal escapism is not here to relieve some of the stress.

It will calm down once all of the online connections are consummated when people can start having sex with each other again

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

If you were to look at all the threads on page one at the moment you'll find less tension than you imagined.

A few threads get heated out of hundreds per day.

If you only focus on those threads your perception of the forums will be skewed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*runs around with a knife cutting the tension *

There all sorted

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Is it tense? I've not noticed anything.

Then again I pop in and out and might miss a fair bit.

This is escapism for a great many people and should be fun and not heavy or loaded."

There is a whole lot of space between your should and the reality of it though

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"If you were to look at all the threads on page one at the moment you'll find less tension than you imagined.

A few threads get heated out of hundreds per day.

If you only focus on those threads your perception of the forums will be skewed."

So it’s all my perception?

I didn’t see you making the same comments yesterday then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You do like stirring the pot, don’t you? ... "

It's just a question for debate.

The blatantly obvious 'I've fallen out with X so this thread is about them' threads are rampant again.

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By *heekyredsoloWoman
over a year ago

bromborough

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it"

What’s bothering you OP?

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

It is a bit. I don’t take much notice though. I just disappear when it starts to piss me off which I did yesterday. Just seemed a weird atmosphere.

It’s always been like that though really.

If it’s not fun log off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't really think threads like this help to be honest. Tensions in the forum's go in peaks and troughs and by referring back to it, it only increases the peak instead of letting it go back to normal in my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Over the past few days I have found myself in the forums more frequently than of recent weeks as I have enjoyed participating in threads.

My recent avoidance of the forums is not due to negativity within the forums but rather something to do with my own mindset at the moment as I am dealing with a difficult situation in my personal life and I am now ready to confront it without my emotions affecting my judgement. Quite possibly the clarity of my mind is having a positive impact on my interactions on the forums and I am engaging more.

We all make use of the forums in different ways, for me it's a distraction from real life. It's where I let my sexual personality have a little playtime, or have a laugh. I avoid contentious threads, I have people watched enough to avoid certain characters and I dip in and out at my own leisure for my own pleasure.

NBVN x

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

A few threads a day might take a turn but you can choose to swerve them. Fun threads is down to perception, some might enjoy those topics others find meh and vice versa.

As always with this place it is what you make it. If don’t see it as fun, take a step back.

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

You know my opinion on it

It just makes my head hurt in here right now

Hope you all have a lovely Thursday

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Its been tense for weeks, I just put it down to lots of people having lots of shit going on atm, the normal escapism is not here to relieve some of the stress.

It will calm down once all of the online connections are consummated when people can start having sex with each other again

I tend to agree with you on that.

I think that a lot of people are getting frustrated with the lack of direct connection for when people can meet again as well. Like playing musical chairs with 50 people, only 2 chairs and the music has been playing for 14 months...

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"A few threads a day might take a turn but you can choose to swerve them. Fun threads is down to perception, some might enjoy those topics others find meh and vice versa.

As always with this place it is what you make it. If don’t see it as fun, take a step back. "

It’s not that I’m not finding it fun, I’m just picking up on a lot of tension lately

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m concerned about Essex Tom’s reaction to this elephant, you know what he’s like with animals.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"Is it tense? I've not noticed anything.

Then again I pop in and out and might miss a fair bit.

This is escapism for a great many people and should be fun and not heavy or loaded.

There is a whole lot of space between your should and the reality of it though"

Perhaps i'm not as in tune regarding forum undercurrents. Perhaps I just ignore what seems unpleasant and don't dwell on it.

Someone above posted that out of dozens of daily threads few are actually contentious. I'll agree that if you give emphasis to those that are, your perception might tilt towards things not being ok in general.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/05/21 09:31:05]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't feel any tension.

I've been enjoying the back n forth banter I've been having with some of the women

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A few threads a day might take a turn but you can choose to swerve them. Fun threads is down to perception, some might enjoy those topics others find meh and vice versa.

As always with this place it is what you make it. If don’t see it as fun, take a step back.

It’s not that I’m not finding it fun, I’m just picking up on a lot of tension lately "

Haven't you picked up that it's nothing new?

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it"

What did I miss? What elephant?

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it

What did I miss? What elephant?"

He might be talking about me. Although I didn’t think I’d put that much weight on!

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

Good morning OP. Ahh I haven't been on enough lately to notice. But my guess is that if there is a general feeling of angst and unrest, then it is most likely to be a reflection of what is happening around us.

Were in a transition time regarding the pandemic.. Generally speaking for most, there are shifts happening and that can come with uncertainty and unease..unconsciousy or sub consciously perceived, this can spill into some areas of life.

Oo and there was a solar storm in the last couple of days.. I like to think we most likely can be affected by these big universal events.

Sending love to the tender tensions and triggery trickery.. And to what it is to be human these days.

Lets go easy on ourselves and others.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I don't really think threads like this help to be honest. Tensions in the forum's go in peaks and troughs and by referring back to it, it only increases the peak instead of letting it go back to normal in my opinion."

I’m of the mindset that discussion clarifies things rather than avoidance.

I guess it depends on a persons approach, whether they’re poking the wasps nest or trying to ease the pressure.

It’s been tense on here for a while now, far longer than normal, hence my thread post

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it

What did I miss? What elephant?

He might be talking about me. Although I didn’t think I’d put that much weight on!"

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

Ok ok! I’ll turn my trouser pockets back the right way and put my willy away too.

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

"I’m concerned about Essex Tom’s reaction to this elephant, you know what he’s like with animals. "

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

We need a big marquee...then we can all be in tents together

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's always been tense. Sexually frustrated people...

It's why I used to do debate threads. People need to let off steam and get angry. It blows the cobwebs away and they get an adrenaline rush from angrily bashing the keyboard.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it

What’s bothering you OP?"

Actually nothing!

I’m having a good few days, I’m just picking up on a lot of snippy and tense threads this past week

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By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

"Ok ok! I’ll turn my trouser pockets back the right way and put my willy away too. "

The willy can stay out but thank god about the pockets - they were stressing me out!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I keep reading things like this and I never notice, I must be oblivious to it, or maybe I just don’t know what goes behind the scenes, all those splinter groups, who knows, this and that and the other.

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Why does it seem tense to you OP?

You mention about an Elephant in the room but, fail to mention what it is?

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"A few threads a day might take a turn but you can choose to swerve them. Fun threads is down to perception, some might enjoy those topics others find meh and vice versa.

As always with this place it is what you make it. If don’t see it as fun, take a step back.

It’s not that I’m not finding it fun, I’m just picking up on a lot of tension lately "

It’s always been there though but maybe glossed over or ignored, as something more cheery for people to flit to.

Everyone can’t get along, some forget they are adults and well others just enjoy raising people’s hackles and watching the fall out.

Individuals highlighting one down comment in a thread completely turns a thread on its head, only takes one and then more join in for and against the comment.

If someone posts a negative comment in a ‘fun’ thread just skim over and ignore

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

"Ok ok! I’ll turn my trouser pockets back the right way and put my willy away too.

The willy can stay out but thank god about the pockets - they were stressing me out!!

That’s a relief, I wondered how I’d reach the bun with my elevenses

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

I just want one day in here without this bloody subject being brought up again

Can we all just put differences aside and get along ffs

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"You do like stirring the pot, don’t you? ... "

Not a bit of it!

It’s an open discussion where people can discuss why things are tense.

Although making assumptions like that is potentially part of the issue.

If I have an issue, I direct it at the person that I have an issue with privately. Creating animosity or stoking tensions is contrary to who I am, I want to bring people together, not split them up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m of the mindset that discussion clarifies things rather than avoidance.

I guess it depends on a persons approach, whether they’re poking the wasps nest or trying to ease the pressure.

It’s been tense on here for a while now, far longer than normal, hence my thread post"

Discussion can clarify things, but it can also open up a can of worms. I think this thread is the latter as different people with different opinions will take part and may not want to listen to the other side. Discussions are only constructive when both sides are willing to give and take which I doubt you'll fully get in an open forum like this.

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

"Cant say I have noticed anything out of the ordinary "

This ^^^^

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Why does it seem tense to you OP?

You mention about an Elephant in the room but, fail to mention what it is?"

My intent was to have others explain why they think it might be, rather than me assuming or making accusations

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I just want one day in here without this bloody subject being brought up again

Can we all just put differences aside and get along ffs

That was the point in this thread!

People seem unable to put differences aside at the moment, so I thought that discussing it might help.

I guess not

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

Can’t say I ever take it serious enough to notice any tension.

Will have to pay attention more.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I keep reading things like this and I never notice, I must be oblivious to it, or maybe I just don’t know what goes behind the scenes, all those splinter groups, who knows, this and that and the other. "

I think that you just skate over and post your own threads.

Perhaps I should be more like you

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

First rule of forum fight club..

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"I just want one day in here without this bloody subject being brought up again

Can we all just put differences aside and get along ffs

That was the point in this thread!

People seem unable to put differences aside at the moment, so I thought that discussing it might help.

I guess not"

TM you said it yourself if you have an issue with someone you take it to them, this is no different. Let them sort out whatever it is and everyone else just carries on. Discussing the reasons why it might seem tense on the forum is never going to be a good idea and could just bring issues to the forefront again.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"First rule of forum fight club.."

It seems that way!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because it's a forum populated by real people and not bots. Sometimes it's happy and superficial, sometimes it's tense and deep. Light and dark (with a smattering of grey).

Depends on people's moods and what is going on in everyone's lives at any moment in time.

Mental baggage will get carried over into online interactions.

Can't be rainbows, smiley faces and 'let's be nice' all the time.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"First rule of forum fight club.."

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I just want one day in here without this bloody subject being brought up again

Can we all just put differences aside and get along ffs

That was the point in this thread!

People seem unable to put differences aside at the moment, so I thought that discussing it might help.

I guess not

I agree but it’s not being though.

I’ve seen the same issues being thrown up time and again, petty resentments and misunderstandings rising over and over.

I enjoy coming on these forums, it’s why we returned but it’s getting worse, not better.

I’m not the type to just idly sit and watch others bicker, that just escalates tensions, so I thought I’d ask people’s opinions. At least it might clear the air a bit.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Because it's a forum populated by real people and not bots. Sometimes it's happy and superficial, sometimes it's tense and deep. Light and dark (with a smattering of grey).

Depends on people's moods and what is going on in everyone's lives at any moment in time.

Mental baggage will get carried over into online interactions.

Can't be rainbows, smiley faces and 'let's be nice' all the time."

I think you misunderstand my intent

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By *ambertMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

I blame the youth of today

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I blame the youth of today "

I blame their parents

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"I just want one day in here without this bloody subject being brought up again

Can we all just put differences aside and get along ffs

That was the point in this thread!

People seem unable to put differences aside at the moment, so I thought that discussing it might help.

I guess not

I agree but it’s not being though.

I’ve seen the same issues being thrown up time and again, petty resentments and misunderstandings rising over and over.

I enjoy coming on these forums, it’s why we returned but it’s getting worse, not better.

I’m not the type to just idly sit and watch others bicker, that just escalates tensions, so I thought I’d ask people’s opinions. At least it might clear the air a bit.

And I'm not directly aiming my comment at you btw dude . You've always seemed a decentish guy .

My wish is that whoever has issues with whoever , could take step back , breathe , and try and resolve issues 1 on 1 in an adult fashion . I fear it won't happen though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its lunar, I reckon. Should settle down again now.

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

"Its lunar, I reckon. Should settle down again now."

Yes

I totally agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it"

It's tense outside. Tense online.

Many reasons that one thread probably couldn't resolve and probably make some people more tense.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

These things require mutual and equal communication. Without that, things won't change.

I don't think things will change

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's always some drama going on...i do my best to avoid any knowledge of any of it tbh.

I've never understood why a bunch of strangers on the internet care so much about what each other have to say myself *shrugs*.

The place reeks of jealousy atm too...no place for it in swinging.

It's a shame...makes me post a whole lot less! (Yay for you lot

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I blame the youth of today

I blame their parents

I blame brexit

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

"I blame the youth of today

I blame their parents

Or their parents parent's

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

"I blame the youth of today

I blame their parents

I blame brexit

Maybe Covid is more believable

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I agree it has been a bit antsy lately, but I actually thought it had got better over the last few days...I was completely confuddled when people were saying it was a weird atmosphere yesterday

It never bothers me anyway, if there's nothing to interest me when I'm flitting about I'll just bugger off and do something more productive instead

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I blame the youth of today

I blame their parents

Or their parents parent's "

Yep. Boomers. Definitely the boomers fault.

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

I’m going through a lot of family issues.

So I’m either going to be more of an idiot or more of a goofball on here for a few days.

And now my puppy is having her first period today.

No idea what I’m doing with her lol

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"There's always some drama going on...i do my best to avoid any knowledge of any of it tbh.

I've never understood why a bunch of strangers on the internet care so much about what each other have to say myself *shrugs*.

The place reeks of jealousy atm too...no place for it in swinging.

It's a shame...makes me post a whole lot less! (Yay for you lot

)

Yes jealousy plays a part too sadly

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

In all seriousness from what I know and can see on here I think people need to keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Problem solved then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m going through a lot of family issues.

So I’m either going to be more of an idiot or more of a goofball on here for a few days.

And now my puppy is having her first period today.

No idea what I’m doing with her lol"

Doggy nappy!

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

I think that it only takes a couple of comments to derail things then people piling on.

Plus some of the outrage may not be quite genuine but maybe boredom?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In all seriousness from what I know and can see on here I think people need to keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Problem solved then

Yep, that and come join my axe club... best way of destressing I’ve ever found,

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Its lunar, I reckon. Should settle down again now.

Yes

I totally agree "

Don’t you start...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best to log off it's bothering you OP or have it out with the person privately. Sending virtual hugs x

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"In all seriousness from what I know and can see on here I think people need to keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Problem solved then

Yep, that and come join my axe club... best way of destressing I’ve ever found, "

Omg I’d love that! I’d end up chopping my leg off though. I’m too fucking clumsy

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

"In all seriousness from what I know and can see on here I think people need to keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Problem solved then

what kind of fantasy world are you living in Nora?

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"These things require mutual and equal communication. Without that, things won't change.

I don't think things will change "

I had to try something

*gallic shrug*

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"I just want one day in here without this bloody subject being brought up again

Can we all just put differences aside and get along ffs

That was the point in this thread!

People seem unable to put differences aside at the moment, so I thought that discussing it might help.

I guess not

I agree but it’s not being though.

I’ve seen the same issues being thrown up time and again, petty resentments and misunderstandings rising over and over.

I enjoy coming on these forums, it’s why we returned but it’s getting worse, not better.

I’m not the type to just idly sit and watch others bicker, that just escalates tensions, so I thought I’d ask people’s opinions. At least it might clear the air a bit.

But if it doesn’t involve you, you should step back and leave them to it. Some will be grown up and talk it out, some will just flounce.

Personally I think highlighting it just escalates it more.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"In all seriousness from what I know and can see on here I think people need to keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Problem solved then

what kind of fantasy world are you living in Nora?

. It’s called Nora world. It’s fun here. Come and join me!

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"In all seriousness from what I know and can see on here I think people need to keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Problem solved then

Yep, that and come join my axe club... best way of destressing I’ve ever found,

Omg I’d love that! I’d end up chopping my leg off though. I’m too fucking clumsy

That explains your disembodied leg avatar then?

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

"In all seriousness from what I know and can see on here I think people need to keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Problem solved then

what kind of fantasy world are you living in Nora?

. It’s called Nora world. It’s fun here. Come and join me!

I'm on my way...and I'm bringing gin

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"These things require mutual and equal communication. Without that, things won't change.

I don't think things will change

I had to try something

*gallic shrug* "

I get it. I do.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"In all seriousness from what I know and can see on here I think people need to keep their noses out of other people’s business.

Problem solved then

Yep, that and come join my axe club... best way of destressing I’ve ever found,

Omg I’d love that! I’d end up chopping my leg off though. I’m too fucking clumsy

That explains your disembodied leg avatar then?

Hahahahahahaja. It does!

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By *heekyredsoloWoman
over a year ago

bromborough

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it

What’s bothering you OP?

Actually nothing!

I’m having a good few days, I’m just picking up on a lot of snippy and tense threads this past week"

Sounds like you have absorbed some of it, to create a post like this........

People are people in all there wonderful and brilliant ways!

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I just want one day in here without this bloody subject being brought up again

Can we all just put differences aside and get along ffs

That was the point in this thread!

People seem unable to put differences aside at the moment, so I thought that discussing it might help.

I guess not

I agree but it’s not being though.

I’ve seen the same issues being thrown up time and again, petty resentments and misunderstandings rising over and over.

I enjoy coming on these forums, it’s why we returned but it’s getting worse, not better.

I’m not the type to just idly sit and watch others bicker, that just escalates tensions, so I thought I’d ask people’s opinions. At least it might clear the air a bit.

But if it doesn’t involve you, you should step back and leave them to it. Some will be grown up and talk it out, some will just flounce.

Personally I think highlighting it just escalates it more. "

Perhaps you’re right

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I just want one day in here without this bloody subject being brought up again

Can we all just put differences aside and get along ffs

That was the point in this thread!

People seem unable to put differences aside at the moment, so I thought that discussing it might help.

I guess not

I agree but it’s not being though.

I’ve seen the same issues being thrown up time and again, petty resentments and misunderstandings rising over and over.

I enjoy coming on these forums, it’s why we returned but it’s getting worse, not better.

I’m not the type to just idly sit and watch others bicker, that just escalates tensions, so I thought I’d ask people’s opinions. At least it might clear the air a bit.

And I'm not directly aiming my comment at you btw dude . You've always seemed a decentish guy .

My wish is that whoever has issues with whoever , could take step back , breathe , and try and resolve issues 1 on 1 in an adult fashion . I fear it won't happen though

I tend to agree

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"If you were to look at all the threads on page one at the moment you'll find less tension than you imagined.

A few threads get heated out of hundreds per day.

If you only focus on those threads your perception of the forums will be skewed.

So it’s all my perception?

I didn’t see you making the same comments yesterday then? "

On which thread? There are some threads that upset people and make people feel left out.

There are hundreds of threads running daily that anyone can join in and ignore the ones causing tension.

If you feel the forums are tense do you do something to alleviate it?

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

It's quite easy to start a thread to liven up, or brighten up the forums, without mentioning anything else going on.

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

"I’m going through a lot of family issues.

So I’m either going to be more of an idiot or more of a goofball on here for a few days.

And now my puppy is having her first period today.

No idea what I’m doing with her lol

Doggy nappy! "

I’m on Amazon now looking lol

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"If you were to look at all the threads on page one at the moment you'll find less tension than you imagined.

A few threads get heated out of hundreds per day.

If you only focus on those threads your perception of the forums will be skewed.

So it’s all my perception?

I didn’t see you making the same comments yesterday then?

On which thread? There are some threads that upset people and make people feel left out.

There are hundreds of threads running daily that anyone can join in and ignore the ones causing tension.

If you feel the forums are tense do you do something to alleviate it?

Yup

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"I’m going through a lot of family issues.

So I’m either going to be more of an idiot or more of a goofball on here for a few days.

And now my puppy is having her first period today.

No idea what I’m doing with her lol

Doggy nappy!

I’m on Amazon now looking lol"

Puppy pads where she sleeps. She might be really good at keeping herself clean.

Don't let her lick your face

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"If you were to look at all the threads on page one at the moment you'll find less tension than you imagined.

A few threads get heated out of hundreds per day.

If you only focus on those threads your perception of the forums will be skewed.

So it’s all my perception?

I didn’t see you making the same comments yesterday then?

On which thread? There are some threads that upset people and make people feel left out.

There are hundreds of threads running daily that anyone can join in and ignore the ones causing tension.

If you feel the forums are tense do you do something to alleviate it?

Yup

Easily done isn't it

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"It's quite easy to start a thread to liven up, or brighten up the forums, without mentioning anything else going on.

Don’t mention the war!!

I tend to agree but when it seeps into those threads too, there’s a wider issue at play. Rather than ignore, I thought that addressing the issues might help resolve it a bit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven't found it tense of late but boring and a lot of people moaning all the time, which is nothing new.

I think arguing/disagreeing is healthy to an extent but I see people take forums far too seriously. When a person claims they are crying or upset over something someone in an open Forum has said, if that's true then it's time for them to step away. I've seen it happen a lot.

I always try and be polite on here as I am in real life but sometimes it's hard not to be a little sarcastic. But, if someone in my daily life, spoke to me in the kind of sneering, contemptuous, up themselves tones like they do on here sometimes, it would be returned with added interest. Thankfully I don't receive grief by dms, because I don't dish it out! Sorry, I'm rambling and not great at getting across how I feel.

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By *nfin8yWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle-under-Lyme

"I haven't found it tense of late but boring and a lot of people moaning all the time, which is nothing new.

I think you put your point across just fine.

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

Elephant? I wondered why there was such a bloody big dent in my sofa!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it has been better lately than a few weeks ago tbh.

I do see you starting quite alot of these type threads though and I am not sure they help at all.

I was browsing happily, tapped on this one, now I feel shitty and feel more tense than before

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I think it has been better lately than a few weeks ago tbh.

I do see you starting quite alot of these type threads though and I am not sure they help at all.

I was browsing happily, tapped on this one, now I feel shitty and feel more tense than before

I’ve started two threads discussing divisions, including this one...

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Is it tense? I've not noticed anything.

Then again I pop in and out and might miss a fair bit.

This is escapism for a great many people and should be fun and not heavy or loaded."

This is me too

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By *lbinoGorillaMan
over a year ago

Redditch

What exactly is the elephant in the room that was alluded to in the original post here?

I'm not much good at subtlety so you'll have to spell it out for me, I'm afraid

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

"What exactly is the elephant in the room that was alluded to in the original post here?

I'm not much good at subtlety so you'll have to spell it out for me, I'm afraid"

It's the one that has wrecked my sofa...

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Haven't noticed it's any better or worse than usual to be honest?

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

"Haven't noticed it's any better or worse than usual to be honest?

Oh the sofa is definitely worse for wear. At very least i need new cushions.

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

"I’m going through a lot of family issues.

So I’m either going to be more of an idiot or more of a goofball on here for a few days.

And now my puppy is having her first period today.

No idea what I’m doing with her lol

Doggy nappy!

I’m on Amazon now looking lol

Puppy pads where she sleeps. She might be really good at keeping herself clean.

Don't let her lick your face

She has puppy pads all around her room. Chooses to use the carpet instead lol

She hates getting dirty though. Only goes on the grass to wee and poo.

She’s a proper princess lol

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Haven't noticed it's any better or worse than usual to be honest?

Oh the sofa is definitely worse for wear. At very least i need new cushions."

Sorry. Diet starts tomorrow I promise

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Haven't noticed it's any better or worse than usual to be honest?

Oh the sofa is definitely worse for wear. At very least i need new cushions."

You’re not meant to talk about it!

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

I think the forums are as tense or untense as individuals want to perceive them at any given moment and that's always been the way in the five years or so I've been here - there will always be contentious threads, ot threads that degenerate, just as there will always be people that will never see eye to eye - it's the nature of not only forums but life.

Ultimately they're what we each as individuals make of them - not what can be done collectively to make them better, because no matter what you do there will always be some threads/posts/posters that are not to the liking of others - doesn't make it "tense" necessarily is just a reflection of the melting pot of disparate personalities that use the forums and perhaps acceptance, and possibly even celebration, of that is the way to go.

If I have something to say I'll say it, if a thread is not to my liking and I have nothing to add to it, I'll move on to another. It really is that simple.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Not sure what your talking about ive been around last few days and not noticed anything. Have no idea what the elephant in the room is. Maybe take a step back if its bothering you enough to start a forum thread. Cant always be roses and rainbows. I like it how it is

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

I see where you're coming from, OP. And I see the huge and varied response to it. I think that tells the story in and of itself - some people want to thrash things out and clear the air, others don't, some people are affected, others aren't, some take the forums very seriously, some don't, some are struggling themselves, some aren't.

And so we go on as a disparate group of individuals

Mrs kf x

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

No idea what OP is referring to yesterday, but have noticed more snippy threads of late. Not sure focussing on them and trying to eradicate them is helping though.

Too many people are having digs.

Too many people being offended.

Too many people trying to call out people for offending people and in the process, offending more people.

Surely the best thing is to ignore said threads? Don't give them the oxygen of attention.

And if you feel that a thread has the makings of offending/upsetting/annoying you just don't open it. Simple.

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"Not sure what your talking about ive been around last few days and not noticed anything. Have no idea what the elephant in the room is. Maybe take a step back if its bothering you enough to start a forum thread. Cant always be roses and rainbows. I like it how it is"

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I see where you're coming from, OP. And I see the huge and varied response to it. I think that tells the story in and of itself - some people want to thrash things out and clear the air, others don't, some people are affected, others aren't, some take the forums very seriously, some don't, some are struggling themselves, some aren't.

And so we go on as a disparate group of individuals

Mrs kf x"

For some reason this made me chuckle

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

And so we go on as a disparate group of individuals

Mrs kf x

For some reason this made me chuckle"

I don't think it's anything to laugh about, FFS be kind TM!

Oh wait, I meant this emoji

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

Which would you rather have, an elephant in the room or a baby blue whale in the bathtub? And another nuisance is when you find a kangaroo in the kitchen...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't say I have noticed any tension OP

But then again, I'm not that bright at times and often slow on the uptake

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Which would you rather have, an elephant in the room or a baby blue whale in the bathtub? And another nuisance is when you find a kangaroo in the kitchen..."

I had 2 frogs mating in my utility room once. And I stepped on them barefoot. That wasn’t pleasant. For either me or the frogs

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"It’s all a bit tense around here at the moment, it feels like everyone is making small talk but no one is addressing the elephant in the room...

Obviously I’m not one to do that and the idea of small talk makes my skin crawl, so let’s hear it; what’s bothering you and why are the forums so tense in your opinion?

Let’s talk about it"

I hate small talk ....

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"Which would you rather have, an elephant in the room or a baby blue whale in the bathtub? And another nuisance is when you find a kangaroo in the kitchen...

I had 2 frogs mating in my utility room once. And I stepped on them barefoot. That wasn’t pleasant. For either me or the frogs

Nora! Than made me sick up a little bit

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Which would you rather have, an elephant in the room or a baby blue whale in the bathtub? And another nuisance is when you find a kangaroo in the kitchen..."

I still need therapy

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I think folk are getting aggy because everything is opening up, except local vaginas, and that is frustrating for the men folk, annoying for the women folk and they just want sex NOW.

Plus the weather has been epically shite. Nobody is feeling good because the weather is shite. Sun comes out and so do the smiles.

That’s my ten pence worth anyway.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Which would you rather have, an elephant in the room or a baby blue whale in the bathtub? And another nuisance is when you find a kangaroo in the kitchen...

I had 2 frogs mating in my utility room once. And I stepped on them barefoot. That wasn’t pleasant. For either me or the frogs

Imagine being stepped on in the throes of passion?!

Coitus squishus

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"I think folk are getting aggy because everything is opening up, except local vaginas, and that is frustrating for the men folk, annoying for the women folk and they just want sex NOW.

Plus the weather has been epically shite. Nobody is feeling good because the weather is shite. Sun comes out and so do the smiles.

That’s my ten pence worth anyway.

I'd agree with this

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

I'm not tense.

I don't sense the tension of others - online that is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/05/21 12:33:06]

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Which would you rather have, an elephant in the room or a baby blue whale in the bathtub? And another nuisance is when you find a kangaroo in the kitchen...

I had 2 frogs mating in my utility room once. And I stepped on them barefoot. That wasn’t pleasant. For either me or the frogs

Imagine being stepped on in the throes of passion?!

Coitus squishus "

I’d just like to add they were fine and were still very much alive and attached to each other when they were put outside.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cant see the elephant through all these trunks...

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I think folk are getting aggy because everything is opening up, except local vaginas, and that is frustrating for the men folk, annoying for the women folk and they just want sex NOW.

Plus the weather has been epically shite. Nobody is feeling good because the weather is shite. Sun comes out and so do the smiles.

That’s my ten pence worth anyway.

I tend to agree.

Earlier in the thread I likened it to playing musical chairs with 50 people, 2 chairs and the music has been playing for 14 months

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By *ostonJoeMan
over a year ago

Boston

Everyone just calm the fuck down, alright?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

"Everyone just calm the fuck down, alright?

Who put you in charge. If I want to calm down I will !

Do I get the part ?

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

Even the local updates page is quiet today. No updates for over an hour!!!

Something definitely in the air today lol

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By *ostonJoeMan
over a year ago

Boston

"Everyone just calm the fuck down, alright?

Who put you in charge. If I want to calm down I will !

Do I get the part ? "

Relaaaax. Everyone be cool. No one is telling you what to do. We're all friends here, right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not that I have noticed but mind you I not been on much maybe a post or 2 a day at the moment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My own issues have put a different spin on things as far as the forums are concerned.

I've a lot going on and that's reflected in how I've posted and how I've come across to some people.

It's part of life, your 'real' things can impact on your online persona and affect others.

Add onto this if anyone takes issue with you. Their conversations with others will only have one side, a bias and this can impact on how the mood of a thread goes.

Real life AND online issues can really affect the general mood of any forum x

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