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"How does language make you feel? How likely is an articulate person to be successful in getting a meet with you? Equally, how does so-called bad language feature on your list of turn-ons/ offs? " I'm one of those for whom written and spoken language makes a massive difference. I'm a huge fan of well spoken language, well written language and very much the opposite for bad language and bad writing. It's one of our biggest tools for communicating and I can't understand why people are not more passionate about it. I know school isn't cool but it's why I had to switch the Brits off last night as Lewis capaldi just came out swearing needlessly. | |||
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"For me, it's very important. But I'm a linguist. I love the use of language in all it's forms. There's only two places for bad language in my world. When I'm driving and in bed. Call me a w***e in real life and I'll walk away. Do the same whilst you hold onto my hair as you push me against a wall and I'm putty " So, for you it is about context as much as anything. I would agree that the appropriateness of some words depend on their context. I, too, love languages, even the ones I do not understand but that is more about the sound per se. The careful and deliberate choice of words is incredibly erotic, isn't it? | |||
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"For me, it's very important. But I'm a linguist. I love the use of language in all it's forms. There's only two places for bad language in my world. When I'm driving and in bed. Call me a w***e in real life and I'll walk away. Do the same whilst you hold onto my hair as you push me against a wall and I'm putty So, for you it is about context as much as anything. I would agree that the appropriateness of some words depend on their context. I, too, love languages, even the ones I do not understand but that is more about the sound per se. The careful and deliberate choice of words is incredibly erotic, isn't it?" It is very erotic And context is extremely important. I really frown on casual use of swearing/bad language. My grown up children still apologise if they come out with something they know I'll disapprove of. There is a time and a place for everything x | |||
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"So I am thinking if people are attracted to seductive language (in the broad sense of the word, not just limited to fabs and the scene), it really would make sense to craft our messages to each other with a bit of thought? Thinking of what we want to achieve with our message and choose the words accordingly?" Absolutely, I think a combination of suggesting, hinting, playing with possibilities with a bit of restraint can work well. There has to be interest and work to do on both sides or it becomes dull. Like when you give a presentation , you have to tell a story or sell an idea to bring them in, but you also try to trigger the audiences imagination so they create new possibilities and fill in the gaps themselves, it’s never a one way delivery, or they just nod off | |||
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"And as for bad language ... it is a tool like any other set of words. I use bad words as emphasis all the time. It's just how I talk. That was a nice dinner. fuck me, that was a nice dinner. One tells you a fact The other emphasises how nice it was. I'm not about to rock up to my sister in law and call her a slag. Or call a random stranger a slut. I'm not disrespectful. " I think someone just stole his dinner jacket because it was so nice | |||
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"It’s not a deal breaker for me, personality is important though." I understand, and for some it may, for others it may not be a deal breaker. I was more focussing on how language and a well presented message for example could lead to many more, more successful meets on here as well. If you guys realised that many, perhaps the majority of women for example respond well to an articulate initial message rather than a "how's you" or "what u up to" etc... there would be less frustration perhaps? And... personality is hugely important and it is reflected in how somebody talks and writes. | |||
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"As it's been mentioned, for bad language it depends on the context. As for someone being articulate, it's definitely a plus and something I feel is very impressive as long as it comes off naturally and as snobbish. Definitely something I strive towards with some difficulty I must admit with English not being my first language and all that " Same here. I like when people can write a message in an articulate way and I like good grammar and spellings... that said it won’t stop me from liking someone if their English is bad | |||
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