FabSwingers.com forum: Lies your parents told.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The one I can’t forgive was that when the ice cream van was playing a tune, there was no ice cream left to sell.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The one I can’t forgive was that when the ice cream van was playing a tune, there was no ice cream left to sell. "

That's a popular one.

I've been told multiple lies about food I was refusing to eat as far as i know. Some types of meat.

Brutal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That every time the priest took me out of choir practice it was to but a little bit of God's spirit into me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you stare too much in a mirror, you'll see devil's face!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you marry for life and respect women.

then dad cleared off with another woman.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess they didn't want me to grow up to be too obsessed about the looks or something along the lines?! Horrid though.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

"If you stare too much in a mirror, you'll see devil's face!

Candyman x 3

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By *ycombe_21Man
over a year ago

High Wycombe

My birthday fell on the first Thursday they started airing eastenders. Apparently it took my mum a lot of work for that present....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That I will go blind still can see perfectly

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

Eating crusts will give you curls

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Eating crusts will give you curls

They did

Also ate all my carrots and can see f##% all in the dark

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside

"If you stare too much in a mirror, you'll see devil's face!

That's the polite version, my mother told me the devil would stick his arse up!

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside

Another one I was told was...if I ate standing up, I'd get fat legs!!

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside

"I guess they didn't want me to grow up to be too obsessed about the looks or something along the lines?! Horrid though. "

My folks must have been the same...was told self praise is no praise....how awful to tell a child that while growing up

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I guess they didn't want me to grow up to be too obsessed about the looks or something along the lines?! Horrid though.

My folks must have been the same...was told self praise is no praise....how awful to tell a child that while growing up

Oh and my cousin who is 28 now still shudders thinking of the times we were being told some strange man will come and take us away if we don't behave

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But its magic bell!

I so wand a wand emoji

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But its magic bell!

I so wand a wand emoji

Want

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside

"I guess they didn't want me to grow up to be too obsessed about the looks or something along the lines?! Horrid though.

My folks must have been the same...was told self praise is no praise....how awful to tell a child that while growing up

Oh and my cousin who is 28 now still shudders thinking of the times we were being told some strange man will come and take us away if we don't behave

I was told that too!! But it was a coal man that would take us away!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dad used to tell me he would always protect me. That turned out to be the biggest lie he ever told

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you stare too much in a mirror, you'll see devil's face!

Candyman x 3

Bloody hell.

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside

"My dad used to tell me he would always protect me. That turned out to be the biggest lie he ever told

Sadly some dads are not all their cut out to be...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Red shoes no knickers.. Leather pencil skirts means your prostitute so I had a black one and red one. Dyeing my hair means it would fall out. I'm 57 and still dying my hair lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mum had stroke went in to care home bernados at four my dad used to lock me and my two sisters in wardrobe so mum would come back dad was d*unk liar cheat

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

I don’t know but I’m still scared of a Banshee coming for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The one I can’t forgive was that when the ice cream van was playing a tune, there was no ice cream left to sell. "

Omg i was only talking about this afew hours ago, my mum saying this then out came the crap choc ices out the freezer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also if i miss behaved id go too 'mrs ogres' house... she was a creepy old women that lived in a run down house down a country lane... 29 years later i live in mrs ogres house

how stranges that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't step on the cracks in path stones or you break the dishes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I carried on being naughty then I was going to the child catcher from chitty chitty bang bang

Scared for life

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By *ersey GirlCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

If I don't behave Maggie Murphy will come and take me away

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By *moothGrooveWoman
over a year ago

Durham

St Michael is the patron Saint of knickers, that's why they put his name on the label

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By *arker secrets 321Man
over a year ago

West Bromwich

1 Xmas was given empty shoe box and was told it was action man deserter lol x

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

"St Michael is the patron Saint of knickers, that's why they put his name on the label

It’s St Bernard over here

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By *B69Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

"If I carried on being naughty then I was going to the child catcher from chitty chitty bang bang

Scared for life

Feel the same

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Nothing that traumatized me but all the basic ones

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

If there’s one inalienable rule of life; our parents fuck us up and it’s a cycle...

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By *pandjMan
over a year ago

Sparkford

Not my parents but my older brother told me my real mam died in the gas chambers. I was so upset but didn't realise because I was born in 1983 it was impossible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If there’s one inalienable rule of life; our parents fuck us up and it’s a cycle..."

Oh don't, I got rinsed on here a few years ago because I said I never filled my kids heads full of crap like Easter bunnies and Christmas bullshit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My Dad told me all sorts of rubbish from Acorn shells being Fairy hats to a little man who sat in the fridge turning the light on and off

The worst was my brother who used to barge into the bathroom and push me down the toilet if I was sat on it and flush yelling that the bog monster was going to eat me

I never flushed the toilet and always made my Dad go on and do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was always told that the old couple next door were "auntie Mary and uncle Bill" . this all traumatically and dramatically ended when "not uncle" Bill touched me in their back garden late one afternoon.

details might be divulged into on another thread ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'll enjoy boarding school, honestly son be the best time of your life

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

My dad used to say that on a dark night, little people used to run ahead of the cars in the road and put the light on up the middle!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also if i miss behaved id go too 'mrs ogres' house... she was a creepy old women that lived in a run down house down a country lane... 29 years later i live in mrs ogres house

how stranges that!

Things take the weirdest of turns!

How nice of you to get rid of childhood fear in this usual way;-)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*unusual

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once asked my father what the "birds and the bees" were. He replied that he'd tell me when I was a bit older. I was 12. I'm still waiting ...

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

This thread is very dark.

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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago

Near Marlborough

Eyes on the back of her head. I looked for them for years. I must have been 12 before I worked that out.

Funny enough my daughter is bothered by it now.

V x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was in a huff my mum would say if the wind changes direction my face will stay like that......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The good old it’s illegal to have the interior light on in the car whilst driving she used to shout all the time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They lied about Christmas presens/Santa's existence...buggers

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

If you ignore the bullies they'll go away.

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By *r G888Man
over a year ago

south Wales

"They lied about Christmas presens/Santa's existence...buggers

Santa's not real?

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By *r G888Man
over a year ago

south Wales

"When I was in a huff my mum would say if the wind changes direction my face will stay like that...... "

My mum used to say the same, and you'll get square eyes from sitting to close to the tv

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They lied about Christmas presens/Santa's existence...buggers

Santa's not real?

Unfortunately...

I know I know!!im in shock myself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That (on holiday) they’d only be in the pub five minutes while me and my brother sat on the step with pop and quavers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" ... The worst was my brother who used to barge into the bathroom and push me down the toilet if I was sat on it and flush yelling that the bog monster was going to eat me

I never flushed the toilet and always made my Dad go on and do it

Even I’m scared to go the toilet after reading that! Bog monster?!?

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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

If you play with your Johnson you'll go blind haha

I still see crystal clear you liars (imma tell them) lol

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