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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Just for fun,

Either post a message that is typically sent on fab or make one up.

Or reply to a message another fabber has posted as if you had received it.

But! Make the replies as witty and as sarcastic as possible.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Can I ask you a question?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Message..

Hey how are you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"In "

Out!

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By *isAdventure69Woman
over a year ago

Hampshire


"Can I ask you a question?"

You just have

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"Can I ask you a question?"

You already did

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Please don't post actual messages that you have received as it is against fab rules

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I ask you a question?"

Of course you can. I have a PHD in quiz show questions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How's lockdown treating you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Are you on the pill?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"In

Out! "

Shake it all about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm guessing this is a typical question:

Ma balls are turnin blue, can I unload across your arse?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I ask you a question?"

No and let me tell you why, this Is a socially accepted way to ease into something that might be a personally awkward question. By asking a non question, the asker is being passively defensive. They are defending themselves from potentially negative reactions to the real question by posing an easy lead in, if the answer is ‘no’ they’re not the one being impolite, after all asking if you can ask has to be polite?!

By getting a ‘yes’ to this polite lead in question, you are already predisposed to positively answer the following question because you’ve have already partially agreed to it.’

So sorry you can’t.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Please don't post actual messages that you have received as it is against fab rules "

This!

But hoping everyone knew that anyway.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Are you really that fat???

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Message..

Hey how are you?"

Agony, had a banging curry last night that my tummy isn't thanking me for. It's coming out like lava.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Message..

Hey how are you?"

I’m as well today as I was yesterday but I’ve no idea about tomorrow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you this funny in real life?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can fuck her other hole for youse"

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts


"Can I ask you a question?

No and let me tell you why, this Is a socially accepted way to ease into something that might be a personally awkward question. By asking a non question, the asker is being passively defensive. They are defending themselves from potentially negative reactions to the real question by posing an easy lead in, if the answer is ‘no’ they’re not the one being impolite, after all asking if you can ask has to be polite?!

By getting a ‘yes’ to this polite lead in question, you are already predisposed to positively answer the following question because you’ve have already partially agreed to it.’

So sorry you can’t.

"

Oh my I’m so using this from now on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Are you on the pill? "

Yes the anti fucktard pill

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Can I ask you a question?

No and let me tell you why, this Is a socially accepted way to ease into something that might be a personally awkward question. By asking a non question, the asker is being passively defensive. They are defending themselves from potentially negative reactions to the real question by posing an easy lead in, if the answer is ‘no’ they’re not the one being impolite, after all asking if you can ask has to be polite?!

By getting a ‘yes’ to this polite lead in question, you are already predisposed to positively answer the following question because you’ve have already partially agreed to it.’

So sorry you can’t.

"

I'm going to keep that as a copy and paste message!

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Are you on the pill? "

Citalopram for a couple of years but I'm trying the more holistic approach these days.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

"I can fuck her other hole for youse""

Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place, and I don't care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward; how much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that!

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts


"Are you on the pill?

Yes the anti fucktard pill "

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Can I ask you a question?

No and let me tell you why, this Is a socially accepted way to ease into something that might be a personally awkward question. By asking a non question, the asker is being passively defensive. They are defending themselves from potentially negative reactions to the real question by posing an easy lead in, if the answer is ‘no’ they’re not the one being impolite, after all asking if you can ask has to be polite?!

By getting a ‘yes’ to this polite lead in question, you are already predisposed to positively answer the following question because you’ve have already partially agreed to it.’

So sorry you can’t.

I'm going to keep that as a copy and paste message! "

Copy and paste message - never.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Message:

Wna fk

Message:

Will your wife breastfeed me?

(We don't judge but these are two examples of someone introducing themself for the first time)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Message..

Hey how are you?"

Funny you ask. I was just wondering “how am I”, then I started to look towards the bible, particularly the part about sodom and gamora. Seems quite fun to be fair. Fancy giving it a go?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You clearly have 5 jokes on heavy rotation, when are you going to get some new material cause me and the guys are getting tired of it ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I ask you a question?

No and let me tell you why, this Is a socially accepted way to ease into something that might be a personally awkward question. By asking a non question, the asker is being passively defensive. They are defending themselves from potentially negative reactions to the real question by posing an easy lead in, if the answer is ‘no’ they’re not the one being impolite, after all asking if you can ask has to be polite?!

By getting a ‘yes’ to this polite lead in question, you are already predisposed to positively answer the following question because you’ve have already partially agreed to it.’

So sorry you can’t.

I'm going to keep that as a copy and paste message! "

Quote your sources woman!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You clearly have 5 jokes on heavy rotation, when are you going to get some new material cause me and the guys are getting tired of it ? "

Do you just do fish puns for the halibut?

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Are you this funny in real life? "

Only if we communicate via the written word.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"IT'S CALLED BEING WELL MANNERED!!"

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"Message..

Hey how are you?

Agony, had a banging curry last night that my tummy isn't thanking me for. It's coming out like lava."

Chinese tonight?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You clearly have 5 jokes on heavy rotation, when are you going to get some new material cause me and the guys are getting tired of it ?

Do you just do fish puns for the halibut? "

Cod loves a fryer

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By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

Do you meet men

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny


"Can I ask you a question?"

“Can I ask you a question?” is questioning their capability to ask a question.

“May I ask you a question?” is requesting permission to ask a question.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meet me now

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By *andyMinx_tvTV/TS
over a year ago

Leeds


"Message..

Hey how are you?"

Similar, but "How R U".

Message:

"What R U up 2"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't know you that well"

"OK. Thanks anyway Auntie Mary. Say hi to Uncle Ted for me."

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Message..

Hey how are you?

Agony, had a banging curry last night that my tummy isn't thanking me for. It's coming out like lava.

Chinese tonight?"

Another curry, need to beat the record lava temperature of what a human can withstand without passing out through shock

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Can I ask you a question?

No and let me tell you why, this Is a socially accepted way to ease into something that might be a personally awkward question. By asking a non question, the asker is being passively defensive. They are defending themselves from potentially negative reactions to the real question by posing an easy lead in, if the answer is ‘no’ they’re not the one being impolite, after all asking if you can ask has to be polite?!

By getting a ‘yes’ to this polite lead in question, you are already predisposed to positively answer the following question because you’ve have already partially agreed to it.’

So sorry you can’t.

I'm going to keep that as a copy and paste message!

Quote your sources woman! "

I will do Mister! Just for you.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Meet me now "

I'll be the one in a clown mask chasing you with a hatchet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You clearly have 5 jokes on heavy rotation, when are you going to get some new material cause me and the guys are getting tired of it ?

Do you just do fish puns for the halibut?

Cod loves a fryer "

Just reported this comment for being too funny

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Meet me now

I'll be the one in a clown mask chasing you with a hatchet. "

You say the sexiest things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I ask you a question?

“Can I ask you a question?” is questioning their capability to ask a question.

“May I ask you a question?” is requesting permission to ask a question.

"

I would like to ask you a question.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I doubt youll see this in the 1000's of messages you get everyday but here's me...

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By *luebellRacerCouple
over a year ago

Shropshire

Omg, you're the hottest girl/man/couple on Fab!

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I doubt youll see this in the 1000's of messages you get everyday but here's me... "

You're right, I didn't see it so no need to check your sent message box.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In...whatever...

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Omg, you're the hottest girl/man/couple on Fab! "

That's one message I've never had. I feel so left out now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Where abouts are you?

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"Can I ask you a question?"

You just did. And no you can’t

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How's lockdown treating you? "

Honestly not too bad. Kind of reminds me of my time in insulation in prison.

I mean I wish they’d let me empty my bucket more often, and the lack of sunlight is awful, but I guess that’s the price you pay for being locked in a sex offenders basement.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Would you like a massage? I'm experienced.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Where abouts are you? "

At a crossroads in life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Where abouts are you? "

We’ll just look out side. See me waving... I’ll pop down my binoculars so you can recognise me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I doubt youll see this in the 1000's of messages you get everyday but here's me... "

Have you read mine yet

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Just wanted to say your pics are awesome.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fancy a meet

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Would you like a massage? I'm experienced. "

So is my wand, doubles up as a full body massager and doesn't expect conversation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get your coat, you've pulled.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Fancy a meet "

I have a white van, I'm at the McDonald's around the corner. Let's go

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Hi guys"

Hi Sloth, give one eyed willie my regards.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Hi, You've been given a 24hr forum timeout.....

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By *C7995XCouple
over a year ago

London

Hi. How are uses. I’m an “experienced” bull (aged in his early 20’s)

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts


"Hi, You've been given a 24hr forum timeout....."

. No point replying to those!

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Hi. How are uses. I’m an “experienced” bull (aged in his early 20’s) "

So he did the 2 week course then??

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By *heekyeyesMan
over a year ago

Southampton

So many messages

Definitely need to quit my life now

I don't know how to speak with someone now

Left over

It's nothing is satisfying anyone I see

I mean alright you are a woman and you are special and you need to be treated with respect but come on

If a guy is texting dirty or weird it's not good...if he asking you about your life it's not good ...

Literally pointless to try having a conversation with someone here

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By *luebellRacerCouple
over a year ago

Shropshire


"Just wanted to say your pics are awesome. "

Thanks, I bet you day that to all the girls...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

More pics?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What are your plans today?

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By *C7995XCouple
over a year ago

London


"Hi. How are uses. I’m an “experienced” bull (aged in his early 20’s)

So he did the 2 week course then?? "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are your boobs real?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just wanted to say your pics are awesome. "

That was my message

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By *luebellRacerCouple
over a year ago

Shropshire

Hey I loved your pics and sent you a friend request because I saw you were local and we're staying nearby for the week.

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside

Wanna fuck now

Wanna see me cum

Wanna watch my cam....I could go on...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would you like your cock sucked, I know it says you’re straight but it’s only a blowie you can even close your eyes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Wanna fuck now

Wanna see me cum

Wanna watch my cam....I could go on..."

Wanna watch me reply

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Are your boobs real? "

Partly. Does that count? The rest is silicone. But would you turn down a fuck if they weren't real?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just wanted to say your pics are awesome. "
Thanks. Your 14 different angles of your cock is a modern art tour de force

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By *luebellRacerCouple
over a year ago

Shropshire


"Would you like your cock sucked, I know it says you’re straight but it’s only a blowie you can even close your eyes "

Don't close your eyes, I want to see into your soul as you cum.

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By *luebellRacerCouple
over a year ago

Shropshire


"Just wanted to say your pics are awesome. Thanks. Your 14 different angles of your cock is a modern art tour de force"

too true.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So many messages

Definitely need to quit my life now

I don't know how to speak with someone now

Left over

It's nothing is satisfying anyone I see

I mean alright you are a woman and you are special and you need to be treated with respect but come on

If a guy is texting dirty or weird it's not good...if he asking you about your life it's not good ...

Literally pointless to try having a conversation with someone here "

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Morning sexy, id love a naughty chat with you

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Would you like a massage? I'm experienced.

So is my wand, doubles up as a full body massager and doesn't expect conversation. "

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Hey I loved your pics and sent you a friend request because I saw you were local and we're staying nearby for the week."

And I'm gonna ignore the friend request for the same reasons

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Would you like your cock sucked, I know it says you’re straight but it’s only a blowie you can even close your eyes

Don't close your eyes, I want to see into your soul as you cum. "

That's sooooo romantic.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just wanted to say your pics are awesome. Thanks. Your 14 different angles of your cock is a modern art tour de force"

I might copy and paste this one too

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Cam?

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Morning sexy, id love a naughty chat with you"

And I'd love some peace and quiet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best one I get lately is "Your not fat!"

Response- You're*.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Are you this funny in real life? "

No, my ad-lib lines are well rehearsed

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside


"Best one I get lately is "Your not fat!"

Response- You're*."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would you like your cock sucked, I know it says you’re straight but it’s only a blowie you can even close your eyes

Don't close your eyes, I want to see into your soul as you cum. "

Ermm my imagination just went through the roof

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Morning sexy, id love a naughty chat with you"

You only had to ask!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would you chat with me and my wife

Profile is not photo verified and has 1 cam verification from 1983

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Best one I get lately is "Your not fat!"

Response- You're*."

OK. OK.

Your not YOU'RE.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Cam?"

No way. My head is too big for your screen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just for fun,

Either post a message that is typically sent on fab or make one up.

Or reply to a message another fabber has posted as if you had received it.

But! Make the replies as witty and as sarcastic as possible. "

I never get sent messages unless I send some first and it’s rare I send many nowadays. But I imagine them to be something like:

FAF?

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Would you chat with me and my wife

Profile is not photo verified and has 1 cam verification from 1983 "

I don't chat with my own mother, what makes you so fucking special?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The old

Hi I’m in your town for a few days fancy meeting up?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Cam?"

No, Clive.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you chat with me and my wife

Profile is not photo verified and has 1 cam verification from 1983

I don't chat with my own mother, what makes you so fucking special? "

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Cam?"

Per van?

Only if it's kitted out like the Mystery Machine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just wanted to say your pics are awesome. "

Well that makes one of us!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would you chat with me and my wife

Profile is not photo verified and has 1 cam verification from 1983 "

Yeah of course. Give me a second I’ll just ask her.

She says yeah sure, giver her a minute to put her knickers back on and she’d love to speak to me but said she’ll talk to you when she gets back home.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey I loved your pics and sent you a friend request because I saw you were local and we're staying nearby for the week."

You’ve clearly messaged the wrong profile by mistake

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just for fun,

Either post a message that is typically sent on fab or make one up.

Or reply to a message another fabber has posted as if you had received it.

But! Make the replies as witty and as sarcastic as possible.

I never get sent messages unless I send some first and it’s rare I send many nowadays. But I imagine them to be something like:

FAF?"

All the time but covid and life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So many messages

Definitely need to quit my life now

I don't know how to speak with someone now

Left over

It's nothing is satisfying anyone I see

I mean alright you are a woman and you are special and you need to be treated with respect but come on

If a guy is texting dirty or weird it's not good...if he asking you about your life it's not good ...

Literally pointless to try having a conversation with someone here "

"How r u", how are you finding fab, whereabouts are you... these questions are not asking about a woman's life but are lazy openers, scattergunned to dozens of women.

Try asking about a specific photo, something mentioned in her profile, or sayy something interesting about you. Don't be so defeatist!

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"The old

Hi I’m in your town for a few days fancy meeting up? "

I have more pressing issues, like picking my toe nails.

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside

Since I now have a single profile...the classic...I'm looking for a female to do me while my wife watches...

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'll give you the night of your life. You'll squirt so much we'll be drowning in it, after you worship my mighty manhood.

(Not an actual message, indication of a type)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Are your boobs real? "

Yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Cam?

Per van?

Only if it's kitted out like the Mystery Machine "

In fairness... I could be tempted myself if the mystery van pulled up.

I'm straight .... but it's the mystery van

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

My recent ones all have a strong theme

"Can I get you pregnant?"

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside


"My recent ones all have a strong theme

"Can I get you pregnant?""

Whaaaa Jesus christ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'll give you the night of your life. You'll squirt so much we'll be drowning in it, after you worship my mighty manhood.

(Not an actual message, indication of a type)"

Yes yes yes. ... wait are you the guy who missed the meet because couldn't get a lift ?

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I'll give you the night of your life. You'll squirt so much we'll be drowning in it, after you worship my mighty manhood.

(Not an actual message, indication of a type)"

Oh pickle pants isn't your misplaced self assuredness just like that of a toddler learning the words to the tellytubbies theme song. It would be cute if it didn't make me regurgitate my lunch

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"My recent ones all have a strong theme

"Can I get you pregnant?""

I don't miss those

No hun I'm not on the pill but I am on birth control and you need to use a condom. You are the weakest link, goodbye.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My recent ones all have a strong theme

"Can I get you pregnant?""

Sure, but wouldn’t that be weird being dad to your nephew or niece?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My recent ones all have a strong theme

"Can I get you pregnant?""

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"My recent ones all have a strong theme

"Can I get you pregnant?""

How the fuck would I know? I ain't tested your sperm count and really don't intend to

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"My recent ones all have a strong theme

"Can I get you pregnant?""

Surely you should go get your sperm count checked to answer that properly?

As for getting me pregnant.... NO

BLOCK!

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By *heekyeyesMan
over a year ago

Southampton


"So many messages

Definitely need to quit my life now

I don't know how to speak with someone now

Left over

It's nothing is satisfying anyone I see

I mean alright you are a woman and you are special and you need to be treated with respect but come on

If a guy is texting dirty or weird it's not good...if he asking you about your life it's not good ...

Literally pointless to try having a conversation with someone here

"How r u", how are you finding fab, whereabouts are you... these questions are not asking about a woman's life but are lazy openers, scattergunned to dozens of women.

Try asking about a specific photo, something mentioned in her profile, or sayy something interesting about you. Don't be so defeatist! "

I don't feel defetead at all

Those questions was for someone that they just think with a simple hi or how's your life going will make a difference

It's just I like it

A woman or lady should be treated differently... it's not enough a hi !

I love it anyway

Best wishes xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just for fun,

Either post a message that is typically sent on fab or make one up.

Or reply to a message another fabber has posted as if you had received it.

But! Make the replies as witty and as sarcastic as possible.

I never get sent messages unless I send some first and it’s rare I send many nowadays. But I imagine them to be something like:

FAF?

All the time but covid and life "

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Ooh. I like smart women. Do you read books? That's so cute. I like women who read books. Mills and Boon?

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Ooh. I like smart women. Do you read books? That's so cute. I like women who read books. Mills and Boon?"

How to commit murder and leave no trace.

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By *heekyeyesMan
over a year ago

Southampton


"Ooh. I like smart women. Do you read books? That's so cute. I like women who read books. Mills and Boon?

How to commit murder and leave no trace. "

How to get away with murder

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Ooh. I like smart women. Do you read books? That's so cute. I like women who read books. Mills and Boon?

How to commit murder and leave no trace.

How to get away with murder"

Are you a parrot?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Since I now have a single profile...the classic...I'm looking for a female to do me while my wife watches... "

"Do you"? I mean, I'll try but I'm not a great impersonator, unless you're from Birmingham. I do a great brummy accent...

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By *nfin8yWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle-under-Lyme


"Can I ask you a question?"

Why?

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

I regularly get - ‘Mr M will you please put your balls in my arse please’

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By *iablo soloWoman
over a year ago

southside


"Since I now have a single profile...the classic...I'm looking for a female to do me while my wife watches...

"Do you"? I mean, I'll try but I'm not a great impersonator, unless you're from Birmingham. I do a great brummy accent... "

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"How's lockdown treating you? "

It doesn't have emotion or make conscious decisions ya know.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I'm guessing this is a typical question:

Ma balls are turnin blue, can I unload across your arse?"

I don't do smurfs.

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By *heNYCSausageMan
over a year ago

Everton

Here’s what I usually receive:

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Message..

Hey how are you?"

Bit of gas, but otherwise good

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By *heHungStudentMan
over a year ago

Kettering

Up to much?

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By *arahtvTV/TS
over a year ago

dublin


"Are you on the pill? "

yes

spiro to make my cock shrink

and oestrogen to make my tits grow

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By *arahtvTV/TS
over a year ago

dublin


"Up to much?"

no just wasted 30 seconds of my life reading another one liner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"In

Out!

Shake it all about "

Oh the hokey y

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Up to much?"

Oh gods yes. I’ve had to stop just to reply to you...

In fact if you’ve got half an hour to read it, here’s a comprehensive in depth and detailed over view of what I’ve been up to...

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