FabSwingers.com forum: Attraction vs hatred

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Please don't be too led by the subject line. Pondering a question based on a conversation I had.

Can you still fancy someone sexually/physically if you despise them as a person/their behaviour/personality? Or the two cannot be separated?

And what on Earth is a hate fuck BTW?

Excuse me if i don't reply to all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I absolutely couldn't

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

No absolutely not.

I can't be attracted to arseholes no matter how good they look

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm wondering now if anyone would brave saying yes!

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

For me attraction is a full package, so I couldn't sleep with someone if they didn't fit with that package

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

not in the slightest. if i hate you or your personality or if you've said something vile or whatever, that's it.. Over and done with

however when my partner and i argue, or ive deliberately bratted out and wound him up, the hate fucking is incredible

almost like reclaim, but with anger and lust and frustration and fucking the brat out of you

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

I have to at least like the person with whom I share any form of intimacy. I don't have to love them but liking is essential. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never understood what a hate fuck/angry sex is. If I dislike someone with my brain my vagene dislikes them too. If I'm angry or upset with someone I love I can't begin to feel turned on by them until the issue is sorted and in the past.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can 100% find someone physically attractive if I hate them... butbI couldn't be attracted by them if that makes sense

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I can 100% find someone physically attractive if I hate them... butbI couldn't be attracted by them if that makes sense "

So you can acknowledge it but wouldn't act on it? Is that what you are saying?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Despise them, possibly not although I've come close to this with an ex.

I hated him but one look, one smile that I used to remember so well and I could have jumped into his arms again.

Tough question OP.

If they did something that was extremely serious then no.

And I have no idea what a hate fuck is but it doesn't sound fun xx

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Not If I despised him and angry sex is too rough for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I couldn't possibly, polar opposite in fact. I might only start fancy them once I've started to know them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fir me its moves from physical attraction to personality traits and how ppl conduct themselves, so no I coundnt do a c#@t

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Despise them, possibly not although I've come close to this with an ex.

I hated him but one look, one smile that I used to remember so well and I could have jumped into his arms again.

Tough question OP.

If they did something that was extremely serious then no.

And I have no idea what a hate fuck is but it doesn't sound fun xx"

I didnt look at it from an ex sort of angle. But I'm grateful you added it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I couldn't possibly, polar opposite in fact. I might only start fancy them once I've started to know them."

So no sex with a stranger?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've never understood what a hate fuck/angry sex is. If I dislike someone with my brain my vagene dislikes them too. If I'm angry or upset with someone I love I can't begin to feel turned on by them until the issue is sorted and in the past."

There is an order of things..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"not in the slightest. if i hate you or your personality or if you've said something vile or whatever, that's it.. Over and done with

however when my partner and i argue, or ive deliberately bratted out and wound him up, the hate fucking is incredible

almost like reclaim, but with anger and lust and frustration and fucking the brat out of you

Px "

Thanks for that Image!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I couldn't possibly, polar opposite in fact. I might only start fancy them once I've started to know them.

So no sex with a stranger?"

Not without some sort of conversation before hand. Even if they were stunning, I'd have to have some idea if what they the person were like.

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By *aughty_tonyMan
over a year ago

King's Lynn

I once knew a very attractive girl who flirted with me but I turned her down. I would not say I hated her, but the way she spoke to people and acted/behaved, made her unattractive to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could probably fuck them but not fancy them as I take fancy to me I'd want more than just fucking.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I could probably fuck them but not fancy them as I take fancy to me I'd want more than just fucking."

Depends how we understand "fancy".

Maybe I should have just asked - would you fuck them?

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hate is a strong word. I couldn't sleep with someone I hated, or even disliked. I could probably sleep with someone I found annoying though, if he was really hot. I'll just keep his mouth busy

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup."

They always get in my way of thinking

too many word choices..

And yes I do understand the feelings around it. Giving in to physicality..insicts but thinking brain rejecting it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hate is a strong word. I couldn't sleep with someone I hated, or even disliked. I could probably sleep with someone I found annoying though, if he was really hot. I'll just keep his mouth busy

It had a good ring to it. The post title.

But I advised the caution.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup."

That sounds like a path to self destruction

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

I am only attracted to a person I really like as a human so I’d never sleep with anyone I didn’t like or respect no matter how aesthetically appealing they might be. Just doesn’t work for me

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

That sounds like a path to self destruction "

No, just playing the edge.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can 100% find someone physically attractive if I hate them... butbI couldn't be attracted by them if that makes sense

So you can acknowledge it but wouldn't act on it? Is that what you are saying?"

I wouldnt feel an urge to act on it... I can separate thinking someone is physically beautiful without wanting to fuck them even without hating someone

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

No I wouldn't find someone I despise attractive and there is no way I would sleep with them if I didn't like them.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

No. No matter how handsome or physically attractive an individual is...... If I did not like them for any reason I could not fuck them.

Simple as.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

No. If their attitude stinks then I don’t like them. If I don’t like them as a person I certainly won’t find them attractive

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

They always get in my way of thinking

too many word choices..

And yes I do understand the feelings around it. Giving in to physicality..insicts but thinking brain rejecting it.

The power of naughty overrides the sense of right, the forbidden fruit feeling, I've felt it but not acted on it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I could probably fuck them but not fancy them as I take fancy to me I'd want more than just fucking.

Depends how we understand "fancy".

Maybe I should have just asked - would you fuck them? "

Yes I could fancy someone sexually/physically even if I didn't like them (it probably wouldn't go far). Conversly I could also fancy someone I liked but didn't initially physically/sexually fancy.

For me personality can add or subtract from the desire for that person no matter physical qualities.

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

You could be the be the most the greatest looking in the world but if your attitude is not right and the way you act is not good that makes you so unattractive

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

They always get in my way of thinking

too many word choices..

And yes I do understand the feelings around it. Giving in to physicality..insicts but thinking brain rejecting it.

The power of naughty overrides the sense of right, the forbidden fruit feeling, I've felt it but not acted on it "

I like how you described it. Thanks C x

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

They always get in my way of thinking

too many word choices..

And yes I do understand the feelings around it. Giving in to physicality..insicts but thinking brain rejecting it.

The power of naughty overrides the sense of right, the forbidden fruit feeling, I've felt it but not acted on it "

And what would happen if you did?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

They always get in my way of thinking

too many word choices..

And yes I do understand the feelings around it. Giving in to physicality..insicts but thinking brain rejecting it.

The power of naughty overrides the sense of right, the forbidden fruit feeling, I've felt it but not acted on it

And what would happen if you did?"

I am jumping in. Not a question for me..but..

Boundary crossing? Breaking something what was a hard "moral"

Limit? Regret?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when i was younger there was this guy, friend of a friend who i was often in his company and what an absolute d**chebag he was - totally misogynistic, thought he was gods gift to women, treated them terribly and there was nothing about his personality i liked - but my god he was beautiful and the sexual tension between us was unbelievable. he thought he could work his way round the bar and then at the end of the night click his fingers and i would go home with him, which is why nothing ever happened between us, but that was just out of stubbornness from me - i was absolutely attracted to him and wanted to rip his clothes off

not sure if i would be the same now i am older or if i would just have the dislike side now

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By *oam_ShrimpsCouple
over a year ago

NEC Arden

Everyone who says no obviously hasn't been married longer than 10 years

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

They always get in my way of thinking

too many word choices..

And yes I do understand the feelings around it. Giving in to physicality..insicts but thinking brain rejecting it.

The power of naughty overrides the sense of right, the forbidden fruit feeling, I've felt it but not acted on it

And what would happen if you did?

I am jumping in. Not a question for me..but..

Boundary crossing? Breaking something what was a hard "moral"

Limit? Regret? "

This

Personally I would end up disliking myself and doubting my self worth and I don't want to feel that type of negativity.

I've imagined the scenario but the after feelings are too high a price to pay for adventure

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Honestly? Yes. Some of the best sex of my life has been with someone who is actually a bit of a throbber. Maybe I don't despise him but I can see what a dick he is. Yet the sex will always be incredible, even now, ten years after we first met. We wind each other up something rotten but there's always that magnetic draw of his beautiful penis.

I do find people less attractive/desirable if there are certain things I really don't like about them. If you're talking about in terms of Fab, I don't really *know* people as such, perhaps their trait I dislike isn't as my bias sees it. Maybe in person I'd lust after them? This is just waffle.

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By *amie HantsWoman
over a year ago

Atlantis

I don’t think I’ve ever hated/despised anyone.

There are some people I think are total melons and I’ve never fancied any of them, so I wouldn’t have thought I’d be able to fancy someone I really really hated.

Sometimes my vagina has a mind of her own though so I really don’t know.

I hope you enjoy this unhelpful post OP

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

No way.

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

They always get in my way of thinking

too many word choices..

And yes I do understand the feelings around it. Giving in to physicality..insicts but thinking brain rejecting it.

The power of naughty overrides the sense of right, the forbidden fruit feeling, I've felt it but not acted on it

And what would happen if you did?

I am jumping in. Not a question for me..but..

Boundary crossing? Breaking something what was a hard "moral"

Limit? Regret?

This

Personally I would end up disliking myself and doubting my self worth and I don't want to feel that type of negativity.

I've imagined the scenario but the after feelings are too high a price to pay for adventure"

Boundaries are cognitive construct to keep our world safe.

Important where trust is an issue, especially projected trust a byproduct from the past.

I spent time with a Peruvian mystic (most odd person), who pointed out there are different levels of energy in this world.

The worst being domestic.

He said, “you should stand in line in a post office and start exaggerated singing and dancing, people will look at you, most will feel uncomfortable and smile. Yet most will remember you, remembering isn’t an event that happens in some lives”.

Pushing boundaries is not always safe, yet it can be made safe with trust.

Personally, I don’t trust those that cannot.

So domestic energy or free energy? Remember or just live in the murk of domesticated life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I would hate that, I have to like the person I’m having sex with, and I think that would be bad for me, allowing someone ‘into me’ that I didn’t like?

We have rough sex, but I love it because I know and trust him, but if it spilled over into proper anger or hatred, that would terrify me, and that’s damaging.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I could probably fuck them but not fancy them as I take fancy to me I'd want more than just fucking.

Depends how we understand "fancy".

Maybe I should have just asked - would you fuck them?

Yes I could fancy someone sexually/physically even if I didn't like them (it probably wouldn't go far). Conversly I could also fancy someone I liked but didn't initially physically/sexually fancy.

For me personality can add or subtract from the desire for that person no matter physical qualities."

If you take enough time with people it might be just like in that experiment in the big bang theory.. you might feel sort of affection or in this case attraction if you are willing to spend time and listen.

If you can't stand what they have to say .. yes best to come together quickly and.. leave. Don't think neither would be fully satisfying though. No?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I once knew a very attractive girl who flirted with me but I turned her down. I would not say I hated her, but the way she spoke to people and acted/behaved, made her unattractive to me."

Did she treat you right then?

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

"Think semantics are getting in the way.

Had sex with someone I didn’t want too, adored it physically, hated it mentally... yet so glad I did.

Would never do it again, well unless....

If that’s what you are talking about, yup.

They always get in my way of thinking

too many word choices..

And yes I do understand the feelings around it. Giving in to physicality..insicts but thinking brain rejecting it.

The power of naughty overrides the sense of right, the forbidden fruit feeling, I've felt it but not acted on it

And what would happen if you did?

I am jumping in. Not a question for me..but..

Boundary crossing? Breaking something what was a hard "moral"

Limit? Regret?

This

Personally I would end up disliking myself and doubting my self worth and I don't want to feel that type of negativity.

I've imagined the scenario but the after feelings are too high a price to pay for adventure

Boundaries are cognitive construct to keep our world safe.

Important where trust is an issue, especially projected trust a byproduct from the past.

I spent time with a Peruvian mystic (most odd person), who pointed out there are different levels of energy in this world.

The worst being domestic.

Pushing boundaries is not always safe, yet it can be made safe with trust.

Personally, I don’t trust those that cannot.

So domestic energy or free energy? Remember or just live in the murk of domesticated life."

That is a really interesting thought and yes for me it's brought from my past and my domesticated life is my hard fought safe space

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I could probably fuck them but not fancy them as I take fancy to me I'd want more than just fucking.

Depends how we understand "fancy".

Maybe I should have just asked - would you fuck them?

Yes I could fancy someone sexually/physically even if I didn't like them (it probably wouldn't go far). Conversly I could also fancy someone I liked but didn't initially physically/sexually fancy.

For me personality can add or subtract from the desire for that person no matter physical qualities.

If you can't stand what they have to say .. yes best to come together quickly and.. leave. Don't think neither would be fully satisfying though. No? "

Degree of sexual satisfaction for me depends on what it feels like regardless of personality/looks. If I like how they kiss or suck my cock then it'll be good on my end. If they like what I do then, hopefully, they'd enjoy it to.

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

I can't imagine wanting to have sex with somebody I disliked. Luke

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Difficult.

There is someone I dislike, but I still would physically because he is Very good. Mentally though its a no.

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By *aughty_tonyMan
over a year ago

King's Lynn

"I once knew a very attractive girl who flirted with me but I turned her down. I would not say I hated her, but the way she spoke to people and acted/behaved, made her unattractive to me.

Did she treat you right then? "

Yes in general, but did slap me when I told her I was not interested lol. Just in general a disrespectful person, and for me thats a turn off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you can & I have.

I wouldn’t be able to go near them though as their personality would disgust me which would means I’d be dry as a bone!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I once knew a very attractive girl who flirted with me but I turned her down. I would not say I hated her, but the way she spoke to people and acted/behaved, made her unattractive to me.

Did she treat you right then?

Yes in general, but did slap me when I told her I was not interested lol. Just in general a disrespectful person, and for me thats a turn off."

You kind of knew it was coming based on your observations !

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think you can & I have.

I wouldn’t be able to go near them though as their personality would disgust me which would means I’d be dry as a bone!

I believe it's possible too. Maybe that's what some people call dirty sex. Hanging between wanting to scrub off your skin but still trembling at memory.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

No I can’t. I’m an all or nothing kind of person

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have enough trouble getting a shag from people I like.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have enough trouble getting a shag from people I like.....

Are you a man with one of those faces?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In short.. Yes.

And I know the chemistry would also still be there too xx

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

No. I have to like someone to want to have sex with them, if I disliked them I couldn’t let them touch me. I don’t think I’m even capable of “make up sex” because a row needs to be fully resolved and forgiven before I can consider having sex with the person.

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By *-man24Man
over a year ago

northwest

"I have enough trouble getting a shag from people I like.....

You nicked my Hymn sheet ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have enough trouble getting a shag from people I like.....

Are you a man with one of those faces?

How did you know?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have enough trouble getting a shag from people I like.....

Are you a man with one of those faces?

How did you know?

Don't need to be that observant to notice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have enough trouble getting a shag from people I like.....

Are you a man with one of those faces?

How did you know?

Don't need to be that observant to notice

I thought I hid it well

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"Can you still fancy someone sexually/physically if you despise them as a person/their behaviour/personality? Or the two cannot be separated?

I can be instantly turned off by behaviour and attitude, however attracted I was initially.

There's no way I could fancy a person I really disliked.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No. I have to like someone to want to have sex with them, if I disliked them I couldn’t let them touch me. I don’t think I’m even capable of “make up sex” because a row needs to be fully resolved and forgiven before I can consider having sex with the person."

Yes. Nell pointed at something similar.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are people on here I don't like but are physically attractive

I can admire the physical without ever wanting to spend a second in their company.

But people I hate. I can't even look at them...

I can't have sex with people I don't like. Even in a group scene I can't.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

https://youtu.be/aW6xG6YpIok

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

I couldn’t physically bring myself to sleep with someone who was a awful person no matter how good looking they were.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've only ever despised someone based on their terrible actions and I would not let them anywhere near my life.

But I've certainly been sexually attracted to people whose personality I disliked and acted on this, although that was when I was younger. Now I only want to spend time with good people who I really like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please don't be too led by the subject line. Pondering a question based on a conversation I had.

Can you still fancy someone sexually/physically if you despise them as a person/their behaviour/personality? Or the two cannot be separated?

And what on Earth is a hate fuck BTW?

Excuse me if i don't reply to all.

No can’t fuck someone I hate or hate their personalities.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've only ever despised someone based on their terrible actions and I would not let them anywhere near my life.

And who like you back I hope. Always two way street

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"https://youtu.be/aW6xG6YpIok

Thank you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very interesting topic Tuberose... I believe this can definitely happen and its so annoying when it does... Her picture is on your dart board but for some reason you just can't throw that dart!!

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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago

upton wirral

"Please don't be too led by the subject line. Pondering a question based on a conversation I had.

Can you still fancy someone sexually/physically if you despise them as a person/their behaviour/personality? Or the two cannot be separated?

And what on Earth is a hate fuck BTW?

Excuse me if i don't reply to all.

"
Yes have done

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Very interesting topic Tuberose... I believe this can definitely happen and its so annoying when it does... Her picture is on your dart board but for some reason you just can't throw that dart!!

That's all I have to give. Odd thoughts

I like that analogy. Thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I once knew a very attractive girl who flirted with me but I turned her down. I would not say I hated her, but the way she spoke to people and acted/behaved, made her unattractive to me."

As they say, they're personality was a natural contraceptive!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please don't be too led by the subject line. Pondering a question based on a conversation I had.

Can you still fancy someone sexually/physically if you despise them as a person/their behaviour/personality? Or the two cannot be separated?

And what on Earth is a hate fuck BTW?

Excuse me if i don't reply to all.

If I despise someone or don't like their personality I wouldn't fuck them.

An angry/hate fuck in my opinion is "I fancy the arse off you but I'm really pissed off with you."

It's brilliant. Imagine fucking them because you REALLY want to but at the same time get to be aggressive and call them a (insert worst swear word) whilst doing so.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

You can appreciate someone’s physic even if you don’t like them, but that is as far as it goes for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It could be a power thing in certain circumstances depending on the nature of the hatred.

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

Yes, I can feel sexual desire towards someone I personally dislike, or even who I consider to be evil.

I would love to "hate fuck" someone, simply because I've never done so and would be interested to discover what it's like.

I accept it's unlikely to ever happen, though. Antipathy is generally a two-way street, and it's difficult enough to get people who *like* me to have sex with me! Hah.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for sharing your thoughts

I'm sending good luck vibes all around, whether you happy where you are right now or you are just travelling there doing what you can in a meantime.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It could be a power thing in certain circumstances depending on the nature of the hatred. "

That gives me an idea for another thread actually. Thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Very interesting topic Tuberose... I believe this can definitely happen and its so annoying when it does... Her picture is on your dart board but for some reason you just can't throw that dart!!

That's all I have to give. Odd thoughts

I like that analogy. Thanks.

"
.. Thanks Tuberose... Very interesting thread... Oh and your new profile pic is so amazing.. Wow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No absolutely not.

I can't be attracted to arseholes no matter how good they look

This!!

Her x

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

I think attraction and hate are two sides of the same coin. I am going to disagree with most of the forum and say you can have/want sex with someone you intensely dislike.

I would argue it is more common than most people want to let on because often the reason you hate someone/thing is because there is an element inside it you really want but can’t admit it to yourself.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

"I've only ever despised someone based on their terrible actions and I would not let them anywhere near my life.

And who like you back I hope. Always two way street

I actually prefer this one;

https://youtu.be/o90GHE0r_n4

Especially the line “we (are) different people; Adam and Evil”

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Nope. If someone is an unpleasant person, no amount of physical attractiveness would make them sexually appealing to me. I've had a number of incidences in my lufe of being totally put off someone I did find attractive when I got to know their personality.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d struggle to have sex with someone I didn’t find mentally, or physically, attractive.

If I actually ‘despised’ them as a person, I cannot imagine the physical attraction would be sufficient to compensate, nor can I imagine the situation arising where this might become a possibility.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've only ever despised someone based on their terrible actions and I would not let them anywhere near my life.

And who like you back I hope. Always two way street

I actually prefer this one;

https://youtu.be/o90GHE0r_n4

Especially the line “we (are) different people; Adam and Evil” "

I liked the pearls tied around like a noose..;-) and I need her collar.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

"I've only ever despised someone based on their terrible actions and I would not let them anywhere near my life.

And who like you back I hope. Always two way street

I actually prefer this one;

https://youtu.be/o90GHE0r_n4

Especially the line “we (are) different people; Adam and Evil” "

I quoted the wrong person. What a nugget I am today

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

"I've only ever despised someone based on their terrible actions and I would not let them anywhere near my life.

And who like you back I hope. Always two way street

I actually prefer this one;

https://youtu.be/o90GHE0r_n4

Especially the line “we (are) different people; Adam and Evil”

I liked the pearls tied around like a noose..;-) and I need her collar. "

Try Dr Watson once you know the meaning behind it (Watson Pharmaceuticals) it all makes sense

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I don't like the personality, I would be unable to see the apparent beauty in their looks.

And conversely, a beautiful soul will have beauty beyond their physical looks.

As for hate fuck, I associate that with too much porn...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Very interesting topic Tuberose... I believe this can definitely happen and its so annoying when it does... Her picture is on your dart board but for some reason you just can't throw that dart!!

That's all I have to give. Odd thoughts

I like that analogy. Thanks.

.. Thanks Tuberose... Very interesting thread... Oh and your new profile pic is so amazing.. Wow

It is not new but I didn't "wear" it in a while. Spring clean of profile;-) Thank you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think attraction and hate are two sides of the same coin. I am going to disagree with most of the forum and say you can have/want sex with someone you intensely dislike.

I think it would be good if you elaborated on second paragraph. I'm not sure if I understood?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someones physical attributes can be attractive and yet you can dislike or hate them. The connection people describe is more emotional of psychological than physical?

I think a hatefuck speaks more towards the fuck being a dominating act over someone you hate or hate in that moment?

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I think it depends if you can dissociate looks and personality. Someone's attractive looks don't change just because the exhibit bad behaviour. We look at people as a whole package I think, so initially looks are what draws you in, but it's personality that keeps you interested. So even though they are two different things I think, you can't have one without the other.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it depends if you can dissociate looks and personality. Someone's attractive looks don't change just because the exhibit bad behaviour. We look at people as a whole package I think, so initially looks are what draws you in, but it's personality that keeps you interested. So even though they are two different things I think, you can't have one without the other. "

I did wonder that. How many people actually do that? Just drawing a line and not bothering about liking each other as long as there is a desire.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I did wonder that. How many people actually do that? Just drawing a line and not bothering about liking each other as long as there is a desire. "

If I go from some of my friends responses over the years. I know he's an idiot but he's so cute etc. So I think it depends on if it's a night of passion or a relationship they are after.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I reread the thread and realised I missed the bottom part of the original post. Hate fucking.

My understanding is its that you fuck someone like you would if you hated them.

Rough hands pulling at tits and ass, hard and fast, hair pulling, no tenderness.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh good god no. To fancy someone is to fancy everything about them.

Someone can still look hot, I accept lots of celebrities to be good looking and all that, but they are assholes so no, that’s when all attraction stops,- when someone is a prick.

Nice looking, nice person = attractive.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Not at all,

I have to like a person to find them attractive, as soon as I had any negative feelings to someone, they'd become unattractive to me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I did wonder that. How many people actually do that? Just drawing a line and not bothering about liking each other as long as there is a desire.

If I go from some of my friends responses over the years. I know he's an idiot but he's so cute etc. So I think it depends on if it's a night of passion or a relationship they are after. "

I tbink if we stick to just fab context.. probably more likely the former.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I reread the thread and realised I missed the bottom part of the original post. Hate fucking.

My understanding is its that you fuck someone like you would if you hated them.

Rough hands pulling at tits and ass, hard and fast, hair pulling, no tenderness. "

So it's just role-playing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I reread the thread and realised I missed the bottom part of the original post. Hate fucking.

My understanding is its that you fuck someone like you would if you hated them.

Rough hands pulling at tits and ass, hard and fast, hair pulling, no tenderness.

So it's just role-playing? "

That's my understanding. Or acting with genitals

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course I'm positive there are people who do hate the people they have sex with but that's not about sex. That's about power and control

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Of course I'm positive there are people who do hate the people they have sex with but that's not about sex. That's about power and control"

Do you talk here about consented scenarios or sexual abuse?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course I'm positive there are people who do hate the people they have sex with but that's not about sex. That's about power and control

Do you talk here about consented scenarios or sexual abuse? "
sexual abuse and domestic dynamics.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Of course I'm positive there are people who do hate the people they have sex with but that's not about sex. That's about power and control

Do you talk here about consented scenarios or sexual abuse? sexual abuse and domestic dynamics. "

I doubt though being abused they still feel attraction?

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Of course I'm positive there are people who do hate the people they have sex with but that's not about sex. That's about power and control"

I've heard of people having sex with their ex who they don't like anymore though I think that's because of lingering feelings and familiarity so it's kind of bittersweet.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

If I dislike the person or have grown to dislike them over time, any sexual attraction I might otherwise have had goes out the window.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please don't be too led by the subject line. Pondering a question based on a conversation I had.

Can you still fancy someone sexually/physically if you despise them as a person/their behaviour/personality? Or the two cannot be separated?

And what on Earth is a hate fuck BTW?

Absolutely yes!

I’ve had an ex that I actually despise as a person she’s just trash and she would make me really really angry and then fling herself at me and I would pound her as hard as I physically could and she’d love it and scream and scratch and bite and demand more etc and that is a hate fuck in my eyes...obviously there’s more to it than that and I’m summarising very briefly but basically yes.

Excuse me if i don't reply to all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course I'm positive there are people who do hate the people they have sex with but that's not about sex. That's about power and control

Do you talk here about consented scenarios or sexual abuse? sexual abuse and domestic dynamics.

I doubt though being abused they still feel attraction? "
I met a couple here and made real world friends with them. They are in the process of breaking up for the last 5 years although I don't think they know they are. She hates or at least resents him but fucks him because she can't raise the kids on her own. He's not abusing her. He's just not able to read the room. I don't even know if he likes her all that much anymore.

And sexual abuse isn't actually about sex. That's just the expression of the control and power. Even typing this makes me feel ill. But an answer needed to be given

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have had sex with people I dislike

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