FabSwingers.com forum: Boundaries?

By *armupartist OP Man
over a year ago

York

I approached a couple who were very interested in hooking up. We exchanged several warm messages but after I thought I understood what would be involved and was expected of me, the need for me to play with the husband, wanking him, oral...? was introduced, not my scene. Shouldn't the etiquette of this life style require players to be open about what they wanted at the outset?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How long were you chatting before they introduced this?

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By *armupartist OP Man
over a year ago

York

"How long were you chatting before they introduced this?"

A couple of weeks, I thought I was setting up a threesome mmf looking after the lady's needs!

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

After chatting for a while I'd expect to know the score

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did you speak to the woman at all? Sounds like just a man chatting and wanking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few weeks is a bit much to be fair.

It's bad form but it's also life.

At least you found out before the bedroom

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats why its important to discuss things beforehand.

Much better to find out before meeting than at the meet?

2 weeks doesnt really tell us whether or not the timescale is right, obviously it was for them, but not for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Least you found out through text, and not by him putting his cock in your hand

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By *rightonfranceMan
over a year ago

brighton - chalais france

I've had just that recently, chatting to what I thought was a couple for a couple of weeks. Arranged the meet, got the address and time, then two hours before the meet, and they were over an hours drive away, husband said it would just be him giving me a blow.

Needless to say I cancelled the meet until the wife was around.. never heard from them again. So yep suspect it was a guy having a wank at my expense..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not good form really. Especially as it says straight on your profile. MMF can be taken to mean guys playing with each other as well, with MFM being more what you are looking for.

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By *armupartist OP Man
over a year ago

York

"Not good form really. Especially as it says straight on your profile. MMF can be taken to mean guys playing with each other as well, with MFM being more what you are looking for."

I wasn't aware of this distinction!

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By *armupartist OP Man
over a year ago

York

Does sound like the male jacking off on the scenario. Come to think of it he 'liked' a couple of photos of my cock erect, which 'his wife' had asked for! Obviously I am still a bit naive when it comes to this stuff... despite my age!

Thanks for your observations all.

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Not good form really. Especially as it says straight on your profile. MMF can be taken to mean guys playing with each other as well, with MFM being more what you are looking for.

I wasn't aware of this distinction!"

I wasn't aware of this until recently either.

That's why open dialogue is so important. Any misunderstandings can be ironed out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wonder if you'd agreed to their play request, the next message you got would be an excuse about the 'wife' being unavailable/etc. Do you still want to meet up. A lucky escape I believe for you OP.

Why can't people just be honest, I'm thinking of taking my Adonis figure and 14" asset elsewhere.

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By *armupartist OP Man
over a year ago

York

"I wonder if you'd agreed to their play request, the next message you got would be an excuse about the 'wife' being unavailable/etc. Do you still want to meet up. A lucky escape I believe for you OP.

Why can't people just be honest, I'm thinking of taking my Adonis figure and 14" asset elsewhere.

Do I still want to meet them?

I was very taken with the photos of the Mrs. I would have tried my best to give her as much pleasure as my senior years can muster but not at the expense of going against my natural instincts. Not a homophobic bone in my body but I'm not the slightest bit curious!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In a short answer yes. Everyone needs to be open from the get go and have their boundaries on the table. No point pursuing anything further otherwise

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I approached a couple who were very interested in hooking up. We exchanged several warm messages but after I thought I understood what would be involved and was expected of me, the need for me to play with the husband, wanking him, oral...? was introduced, not my scene. Shouldn't the etiquette of this life style require players to be open about what they wanted at the outset?"

Did you state you weren't bi from the outset if it isn't your scene?

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By *armupartist OP Man
over a year ago

York

Did you state you weren't bi from the outset if it isn't your scene? "

Not me, my profile says straight (as does theirs) and my message specifically said, "I am straight but comfortable in a threesome working to give the lady the pleasure she seeks"!

They were looking for males for a threesome or gang bang!

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

some couples do not necessarily into bi-play with every meet and their behaviour changes depends on the person they meet so I won’t expect them to be open about it publicly.

I’m not listing every detail of my looking so why would they.That’s the reason you chat beforehand so you can see where it’s heading and find out their expectations. That’s my humble thinking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Least you found out through text, and not by him putting his cock in your hand "

Or mouth or ass

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Least you found out through text, and not by him putting his cock in your hand

Or mouth or ass "

Or from ass to mouth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am straight and as a couple some years ago we met other couples who then said the guy wanted to give me oral. I politly declined as i am not bi but i asked why they asked when they said they were straight and they told me they are straight but "bi-playful" dureing fun so apparntly this is a thing that some straight folk do.

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By *histlerMan
over a year ago

Guildford

I had an mmf and whilst I was kissing her, the guy suddenly started wanking my cock. We definitely hadn’t talked about it before.

I just rolled with it as I was in the moment. We had a laugh about it at the end. And I’ve since become a lot more open to it lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How long were you chatting before they introduced this?

A couple of weeks, I thought I was setting up a threesome mmf looking after the lady's needs!"

mmf = play by man/man and woman

mfm = no play by man/man

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By *histlerMan
over a year ago

Guildford

"How long were you chatting before they introduced this?

A couple of weeks, I thought I was setting up a threesome mmf looking after the lady's needs!

mmf = play by man/man and woman

mfm = no play by man/man

That’s news to me lol

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By *heonixRaven 777Woman
over a year ago

Guildford

For me personally I don’t class myself as bi but I

would and do play with women, yes I have sex with them or what ever else they may like.

I class myself here as straight as that the choices on here another site I use hete

exible.

Whether someone is gay or not is not solely down to the gender that have sex with in my opinion.

If it is a hard limit for you OP perhaps that should have been one of the first questions you asked?

The couple have made an request of what they would like, while some like to get to know someone a little before they make such requests to see it they may be compatible. Some state it up front everyone is different in their approach.

Maybe this couple wanted to treat you like a person rather than just a cock to tick off a fantasy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be very wary of the couples with onlyfans accounts....

I met a couple recently who asked if it was okay to take a couple of pics/videos for personal use...

I agreed and when I showed up to their hotel room.

There were 4 cameras on tripods pointing to the bed .... 2 huge flood lights , and the husband with a GoPro strapped to his head with a 4K camera in his hand....

I politely declined and was hurled abuse by the husband.....

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

Does feel like it should have been raised in that time.

However, you could have also raised that male on male is something you weren't interested in. After all you were entering a threesome and so it's also up to you to make sure your boundaries are known.

Sounds like communication on both sides failed a little.

At least it came out before you got in the bed. That would have been worse.

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

"How long were you chatting before they introduced this?

A couple of weeks, I thought I was setting up a threesome mmf looking after the lady's needs!

mmf = play by man/man and woman

mfm = no play by man/man

Some follow that rule, but as far as I've seen most don't, as it doesn't really work.

With mmf can the first male play with the female? What if he is gay and only wants to play with the male?

Then this format fails completely when getting into foursomes.

It's just best to use communicate properly and say what you want.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try it you might enjoy it

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